Chapter 37: It's Me That I've Lost
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This story is now Beta'd by the fabulous Northman-Snape . I am so lucky to have her! I feel like she really loves the story and I believe it will be better for it. As always, Please review! The good, bad and ugly.
"How long has he been asleep?" Atheena asked, seating herself for lunch in her brother's chambers. It had been a forced meeting, one that Severus had fought against. "Stop pouting. I had to check on my baby brother didn't I?" She smiled sweetly.
Severus grunted as he sat down. Meddlesome woman. "16 hours now. He shows no sign of waking."
"Is he... did his return go smoothly?" She feared the answer. Her brother was being quiet. The kind of silence one would need to hide their sadness. She hated that he was hurting.
"I need a new bedside table," He answered shortly. "It's broken." Snape sipped his tea, moving a biscuit around his plate.
"Sev what happened? Tell me..." The woman prodded. She'd get the whole story if it killed her.
"He returned Atheena. We had words. I issued rules. He went to bed." His lips formed a tight line on his face. He didn't want to talk. He'd no desire to go over the events of the previous night.
"You need to talk about this. I can't imagine what you're going through. If Rachel ever..." She trailed off, not allowing the thought. "He had an affair...with your Godson," She all but whispered. Snape's posturing had grown more aggressive.
"He is under the age of twenty and we are childless. He did not have an affair." His retort was ridged.
"Bullshit. Those outdated traditions are insane, not to mention barbaric. Don't let him use The Marriage Codes as an excuse Severus." She shook her head, placing her mug loudly on the table.
"I requested a union that followed The Codes. He knew nothing about them until a few days ago," Severus sighed and lean back in his chair. He knew the look on his sister's face well. She wasn't going to let this go.
"You what?" She asked through gritted teeth.
"I believe in The Marriage Codes. I had them sent to him several days ago. He was agreeable."
"Severus! You can't possibly... Our Father hid behind those stupid rules as a way to treat Mom like garbage. How could you..." She was livid. She did not believe her brother to be so close minded.
"Our Father beat our Mother. That's not what this is about. He is mine to protect and The Codes allow me to do that. Do not pass judgment Atheena. They are very effective and I've never turned my back on our customs entirely. I know that you have. That was your choice. This is mine." He did his best to keep his voice down, not wanting to wake Harry.
"So he'll go around banging Draco until he's twenty? That's how you want to live? Marriage is about commitment Severus. It's not legal contract. It's a sacred covenant. I can't believe you're doing this." Atheena was aghast at the conversation. She wanted these customs abandoned and they were happening within her own family.
"The bond won't allow any further...interactions. He had to Occlude the bond to achieve it the first time, with all of this as the fallout. I've forbidden a repeat performance." Severus spoke in his best monotone. "It is a legal contract. A contract that allows me certain privileges to... shorten his leash, if you will. He's proven that he requires that. He'll be safer this way."
"You're going to treat him like he's less than you, something you own... it's disgusting Severus." She was on her feet pacing.
"Harry Potter is The-Boy-Who-Lived. He is lesser to no man. Myself included. He will belong to me; A treasure to be protected and cared for. I can think of no better gift to give him." The Potions Master crossed his arms over his chest. He would not back down.
"You'll expect him to obey you... to ask for permission... he's an adult for Christ's sake! What about his freedom? His dreams? What about him Severus? What about Harry? He'll become a quiet little mouse like Mom, jumping at your every word?" Her voice was too loud. Severus didn't like it.
"I will never treat Harry as our Father treated our Mother! How dare you accuse me of such! My Husband will receive all of the freedom that he can safely have. He will have dreams and I will help him reach them. I will give him the best of everything and he will be protected because of it! I am the head of this house, your house. It is my job alone to protect all of you. I have work to attend to. See yourself out." Severus turned his back to his sister, retreating into his study. Atheena sighed and exited the front door, distraught over her brother's behavior.
HHH HHH HHH
"Get back in bed." Snape issued the command when he heard Harry's light foot steps behind him. He did not turn around.
"I can't believe I slept all day and I'm still so tired. I'm just going to find something to eat quickly and then..." Harry yelped as he was picked up off of his feet. The embrace was not affectionate. He was rushed down the hallway and tossed onto the bed.
"I told you yesterday to stay in bed. I told you to request anything you might need from me. Were my demands too complicated?" Snape's voice was tight, he towered over Harry.
"No... I didn't think..." Harry stammered his words, trying to understand what was happening.
"Yes, it seems like you haven't been doing much of that as of late." He snapped.
"I just thought... that I should probably eat something..." Harry was so tired.
"You should have called for me." Severus grunted in disapproval. "Did you misunderstand me? Was I unclear?"
"No... Well, yeah kinda. I didn't know I was confined to the bed. I didn't think that you were being that literal..." Harry rubbed his eyes, attempting to wake further.
"You'll find that I am always very precise when giving instructions." Snape warned. "You need rest. You will stay in bed. Am I understood?"
"Yes." Harry hated this. It was like living with his professor. The man was cold and harsh.
"At least I know your whereabouts this way. You might have the urge to take another holiday. Perhaps Australia? I hear it's very pleasant this time of year." He poured himself a drink from the overly used liquor cabinet.
"Severus... I'm not going anywhere. It was one time. I left because I had to. You left in the middle of the night once. You're being a hypocrite." Harry hadn't meant to say his last sentence. He was in no position to anger his bond mate. He had to fix what he'd done. He had to keep his promise.
"I didn't bend over for one of your relatives while I was away." He finished his drink. "I don't want to see you Harry. All I want is to hold you, to heal you and I can't stand the sight of you." He chuckled.
"Ironic isn't it? Draco sends his regards by the way. He's very concerned with your well-being." Snape said matter-of-factually. He downed a calming drought out of his pocket.
"You... saw him?" Harry whispered. A million thoughts rushed through his mind. Would that make Sev angrier at him? Had it caused the man pain to see his godson? Was Draco alright? Did Severus hurt him?
"I did. He is my godson after all." He sneered, but seated himself on the bed. He wanted to be close to Harry, hear his voice. He just couldn't look at him.
"Is he... did you..." Harry stuttered, sure that it was unacceptable to ask about Draco.
"He's being fawned over by the fleabags. I didn't cause any damage. I'll save that for when he's well." He dropped his head back on the pillow. He knew that they would need to talk about Draco, he had many questions. Another drink and he began to gather the courage to ask them. "Was it just once or did you two have a busy night?" Snape stared at the ceiling.
'Severus..." Harry pleaded. He didn't want to do this. He would rather do anything but this.
"You will answer my questions and you will be truthful." The older man ordered.
"It was... the night." Harry fumbled with the edge of the blanket.
Snape showed no sign of emotion. "I felt that you enjoyed yourself. Did you discover a fondness for the rougher side? The marks on Draco's neck give the answer I suppose."
"It was... different. Not better, just different." Harry's cheeks shown with a furious blush.
"Who topped?"
"Severus! What does it matter..." Harry was shocked. That felt very personal.
"Answer Me!" The bellow seemed to shake the room.
"...Both." He whispered. His tone held a slight anger.
"Well you were rather adventurous, weren't you? I underestimated you Potter." Snape stung.
Harry cringed at the use of his last name. "Sev... please...it had nothing to do with you. I love you. You are my bonded. I don't understand why you're so upset. Your traditions practically encourage it. You've been with loads of guys..."
"I believe that you love me." Severus assured him. "But, I was a spy. I spent my life reading people. I can see it all over your face and his. You fell in love." His tone was unaffected.
"I can't...I don't...I do care for him...I share my soul with you. I could never love another as I do you. Please look at the bond," Harry begged, he was desperate. Severus had to know that he loved him without question.
"Oh I have. You, without a doubt, are in love with me. Do you believe it would still be so without the bond?" He asked the question he'd been dreading.
"Of course! Sev... you were my soul mate before the bond. You... you were meant for me. You would always be my choice. You are my home. I can't feel for him or anyone, what I feel for you. You make me feel whole. The bond could end tomorrow and it would still be you, without question... Severus," Tears threatened Harry's eyes.
Severus wanted to believe him more than he'd wanted anything. His hand found Harry's, his eyes still refused. He squeezed it tightly.
"Are we going to be alright Sev?" Harry asked afraid. His hand was on fire from the touch of his fiancé.
"We are. You broke no rules willingly. I am a selfish man, and will remain as such. I am furious. I will have my vengeance. I will no longer put up with your insolence. But, in the end we will be fine." Severus was certain of it. They had to be.
"I wish you wouldn't hurt him... he's not as strong as you," Harry said lightly. He worried what Severus would do to Draco.
"It is of no concern of yours what I do to him. Do not interfere."
"Will it always be like this? You issuing orders? I don't like it." Harry lost his patience momentarily.
Snape sighed and rubbed his face with his free hand. "No Harry. I'm angry. I'm very... angry," he finished with his voice dropping off. "I'll have dinner brought to you. Go back to sleep when you are finished. I'll join you later." Harry was too tired to argue.
DDD DDD DDD
"Hey Pup, have you gotten any sleep today? You've been buried in all of those books and notes. You should be resting." Sirius stuck his head into Draco's room when Remus had informed him that he had skipped dinner.
Draco looked up. His face was tired, but his eyes were ablaze. "I have to see Marius." There was no question in his voice. "Before you argue with me, I've been reading about the spell I used and because my magic is now one with Harry's. Magical law gives me the right to defend it. Marius. I want to see him." He mustered more strength in his stance.
"Draco... do you really think that's best? You're weak and Marius is... a mess. Severus would never approve. Albus... it wouldn't be allowed." Sirius shook his head, leaning against the door frame.
"The Headmaster is not here. Uncle Sev... well I don't really care what he has to say on the matter. I know you can get me to him and I must see him. Sirius it is my right...Harry..." His voice held conviction.
"Maybe when you're stronger," Sirius suggested. He couldn't think of a better reason to deny his charge. Draco knew his magical law; Marius now was Draco's to deal with. There was no danger of Draco knowing where Marius was being kept. Severus would have his head if Sirius permitted the visit. "To hell with it! I've yet to piss off the dungeon bat today. I'll meet you in the sitting room."
DDD DDD DDD
Draco followed Sirius down a set of stairs that he had been unaware of. He was dressed in his best. He wore tailored gray dress paints, a black cashmere sweater, and black Italian loafers. His hair was gelled to a messy perfection. He wouldn't want Marius see him as anything other than a wealthy Pure-Blood.
"Do you want me to go in with you?" Sirius stopped in front of a large door.
"No. I'm better on my own." Draco held his head high, hiding any trace of weakness.
"You'll need this if you want any answers out of him." Sirius handed over a small pocket knife. "Severus... he... well you'll see. I'll be right out here."
Draco wasn't nervous as he entered the room. Marius sat unaffected against a wall. He smirked at the blonde through his stitched lips. Draco didn't show his surprise at the disaster of a man before him. "Fallen quite a bit haven't you Mar? All that talk of ending your brother...now you're chained up like a dog... very fitting..." He squatted in front of his ex-lover.
"Where are my manners? I haven't told you why I showed up unannounced..." Draco stood quickly, the full strength of his fist colliding with the youngest Snape's mouth, shredding the stitches, as planned. Marius moaned slightly, attempting to mask the pain. "I'm sure we'll find it much easier to converse this way." Draco looked around the room distastefully.
"You really should hire new people. How are you supposed to entertain in these conditions?" He clucked his tongue before transfiguring a small pebble into a posh arm chair. He seated himself with pride, dusting off his hands.
"Look at you, dressed up in big brother's clothes." Marius chuckled. "Potter wasn't able to scratch that itch for you? I'm a little weak at the moment but I'm sure I could still make you squirm." He rocked his hips.
"It was you who could never quite...satiate my needs Marius. Harry's done a splendid job. It's amazing how talented he can be when he's not repulsed." Draco sneered. He didn't enjoy talking about Harry in this way. But, he knew how to work Marius and this was the only way to get to him.
"He really is making his rounds through the Pure-Bloods isn't he? Loose little thing." His laugh sickened Draco. "You were never one to turn down the pleasures of flesh if I remember correctly. You're very much the wanton boy yourself. I enjoyed turning you into a muttering pile in my chambers... you were never a screamer, shame about that." Marius shook his head, remembering the time he'd spent breaking the youngest Malfoy.
"Much as I'd love a trip down our demented memory lane, that is not the purpose of my visit. I'll find the spell. You think no one ever will. I know the dark arts Marius. I was taught by the best, but then again so was Severus. The difference is, I've bonded to Harry's magic..." He paused, enjoying the tiniest glint of fear in the eyes of his once-tormentor.
"I used The Commander's Link so I can feel you in there. If I can feel it, I will find it. When I find it Marius... I will break the spell, breaking your hold on him and when that's done..." He leaned in closely, grabbing the bruised and broken chin of the prisoner, forcing eye contact.
"I will kill you. I will end your life before anyone, including Severus, gets a chance. You won't harm him again." Draco released the man's face and returned, gracefully, to his chair.
"The son of Lucius Malfoy has fallen in love, has he?" Marius cackled hysterically. "With a bonded man! Harry Potter no less... This is just... fabulous," The younger Snape continued to giggle. "Your Godfather's bond-mate and fiancé. I have underestimated the size of your balls Draco. You'll still never find the spell." He shook his head.
"You have." Draco smiled. "You are not as clever as you think Marius. It's Voldemort's mark, we all know that. You simply adjusted the spell. Give me a few days. The spell will be broken. You'll lose Harry and then I'll be back for another chat."
"You won't, but my door is always open to you pet." Marius purred. "It's you that's lost Harry isn't it? He's with Severus and not you. They're bound. You can never come between that. Harry Potter will never be yours."
"Perhaps not, but I'll be damned if any part of him belongs to you." Draco slid a phial out of his pocket, a knife out of the other. "I'll just get what I came for." He chirped. Marius had no strength to fight, though he feebly tried. Draco held his forearm by his wrist, slicing a large gash through the Dark Mark on Marius's arm. It took little time for the container to fill.
"Blood magic Draco? For a Potter? Who knew you had that much darkness in you." Marius seemed proud.
Draco stopped at the door. He didn't know why he began speaking. "It's not darkness Mar. It's love. You were right; I know how you enjoy that." He was gone before Marius could retort.
DDD DDD DDD
"Is that what I think it is?" Sirius asked suspiciously when they reentered their rooms.
"Draco... you can't do blood magic. You can't use the dark arts whenever you please," the dark haired man chastised, pouring a drink.
"No, I can use the Dark Arts whenever I please, I just shouldn't. It has nothing to do with my ability. I'm extremely proficient." He said in classic Malfoy cockiness. "...When I have my magic, that is. For now it's just research but when I'm healed... Sirius I will break the curse. I've been reading and he used a variation of Voldemort's Dark Mark. I'm sure of it, only no one except the Dark Lord has that kind of power, not even Marius. He must have simplified it. He tied himself to Harry, and ties can be broken." He allowed himself to fall tiredly into a chair. Their outing had used too much of the blonde's strength.
"Draco we've all been working on the spell... stronger wizards than you. Dumbledore..." Sirius sighed.
"Dumbledore isn't bound to Harry's magic. I am. I read that I'll be able to see our magic; to know if anything is threatening it. I know I can do this. I just have to research more. I have to make sure he's..." Draco's voice dropped off. "He has to be safe. He can't be as long as Marius has a grip on him. You're all so concerned over him losing his invincibility that you don't have enough sense to just kill Marius. That leaves breaking the spell. That's what I'll do."
Sirius fought back the urge to argue the reasons that Marius couldn't be killed. He managed to choke them back. "I am very sorry Draco," His voice was quiet.
"What for?" The Slytherin closed his eyes.
"You love him. You're in love with him and he's..."
"In love with Uncle Sevi," His tone held sadness. He put his hand over his eyes. "It's all very unfortunate." Draco waved his hand dismissively. Sirius knew it was an act.
"Perhaps if I hadn't sent The Codes you two never would have... had a chance to fall for each other. I just thought it was fair, that he needed to know what he was getting himself into. I figured you would snog a bit maybe... I never expected... well, this." Sirius sighed.
"I would have pursued him regardless. At least now he's not feeling guilty about it. The rest is...inconsequential." Draco stood weakly. "I have to get back to work."
Black took a long breath. "Alright, let's have a look at what you've got. Shall we?"
Draco grinned to himself. He was being accepted. There was no cruelty here, just as Harry had promised. "...Thank you." He whispered. No further explanation was needed between the men as they walked to Draco's desk.
DDD DDD DDD
"Draco...this...this could work." Sirius exclaimed in excitement. A smile took over his face. He'd had no idea that Draco was so clever.
"Of course it will." Draco snorted. "I've done nothing but research since I woke. I don't have magic but I can still feel Harry's. The stronger it gets the more I can feel..." His fevered speech was interrupted.
"You two are up to something that I'm almost certain I won't approve of." Remus crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the door frame. He had finally left his book when the excited whispering from his charges room had lasted well over an hour.
"Mooney... I think he's done it. In theory, his plan has no reason to fail." Sirius couldn't hide his happiness.
"I hope the plan doesn't involve Harry or Snape. You won't be able to see Harry until Snape allows it and I won't allow your Godfather near you." Lupin shook his head at Draco.
"Should you be encouraging this Sirius?" His tone was disapproving.
"No, it doesn't...well sort of," Draco began to explain. "I'll be able to see our magic, which means I'll be able to find the spell latched to it. It will be weaker if Marius is drained of his power, which Sev can do through the blood magic he used. I can get a power boost from Harry... So all I have to do is figure out what I'm looking for, find it, and use some of Harry's magic to make mine stronger. I'll be able to break it. I'll be too strong and he'll be too weak." The blonde was out of breath, he leaned tiredly back into his chair.
"You've come up with a solution when you haven't yet figured out the problem. You don't know what to look for." Remus didn't want the boy to get his hopes up. He'd been researching endlessly and whatever spell Marius used was nowhere to be found.
"I will. I know a spell Voldemort favored. I'll use Marius's blood to trace the spells that have been born of his magic. I even thought to take the blood from his Dark Mark, which is the basis of the spell. It should make it easier to find it."
"More Blood Magic? Look how the last time worked out for you Draco," Remus reminded.
"This will work," Draco pleaded. "Harry will be free." His eyes fell to the floor.
"You're reasoning is solid. Sirius is right, it sounds like it could work. But, for now you need to rest. You can't do anything until you have your power back and we can talk to Severus without fear of your death. Now, I'm having a house elf bring you dinner and then it's to bed with you young man." Remus flicked his wand and watched the pages and books organize themselves on the desk.
"And you Padfoot... You'll leave him to rest. Do you both understand me?" He watched the men in front of him nod their heads shamefully at his best parental tone.
"Best not to question him when he's like this," Sirius smiled as he walked to the door.
"Draco? Thank you. This gives me hope." Sirius nodded his head at the blonde before exiting the room.
Remus placed his hand on Draco's shoulder. "I'm very impressed. It's a good plan, and I'm sure it will work. We just have to give it some time, yeah?" He grinned and closed the door behind him.
Draco stared at his books longingly, then back to the bed that was beckoning him. After a moment he gave in and crawled between the blankets to wait for dinner. He needed to sleep. A deep smile spread across his face, he was going to be able to save Harry.
HHH HHH HHH
Potter stirred slightly the next morning. A heavy weight held him in place. After waking fully he found Severus's arm tucked tightly around him. His breath hitched, feeling the hard chest of his bond mate pressed against his back. He missed waking this way. Harry was afraid to move and wake up his bonded. Carefully, he scooted as close as he could and closed his eyes, enjoying the moments that passed.
His hand rested lightly on the muscled forearm protecting him. He didn't want Severus to wake up. He had been very clear that he did not want to hold him and Harry was sure that he'd only done it in his sleep. He focused strongly on everything he was feeling, the warmth of skin, and Severus's breath on his neck, the steady movement of his fiancé's chest. He relaxed completely for the first time since he'd returned to the castle. He loved the man holding him.
Severus had opened his eyes to find himself in the same position he'd eased into hours before. The urge to touch the younger man had grown too powerful and the Potions Master found that he could not return to sleep until Harry rested safely in his arms. He had hoped to sneak away from his bonded before he woke but obviously that was no longer an option.
"Remove your hand so that I might move and be comfortable." His voice cut through the silence. It was a lie. He would be content to continue this for the rest of his days.
Harry didn't move. "Please don't. Just stay. Please stay? I need you to stay." He begged, his hand holding tighter to Severus's arm.
"Harry..." Snape's tone was halfheartedly stern.
Harry boldly cuddled closer to his lover, gaining as much body contact as he could. Severus stiffened, growling as he pulled Harry closer. He hated his weak resolve when it came to his bond mate. Harry's gasp sent electricity through his body. Severus cursed the stirring in his groin. The younger man was of no assistance as he pushed back into it.
"Harry stop, we are not doing this." It was an order. The Head of House found the anger that he'd grown accustomed to well in his chest. He wondered if Draco had held Harry like this. Had Harry enjoyed it?
"Why?" Harry questioned. "I miss you. I miss your body. Why can't we?" Harry's voice was full of conviction. He yelped as he was flipped onto his stomach. Harry moaned, knotting his fingers in the sheets.
Severus was on top of him instantly, pulling their pajama pants down to their knees. He whispered a lubrication spell and pushed inside of his lover, ignoring the cry at the intrusion. His strong hand held the back of Potter's neck, keeping him in place. His thrusts were hard, Harry's back arched to meet them, moaning into his pillow. Severus had never made love to him this way, it was fast and hard. The slight pain rippled next to pleasure as his fiancé slammed into him.
"Fuck...Severus... It feels so good..." He panted. Only to fall into the realization that something was amiss. He couldn't move his head. The grip on his neck was too strong, carelessly so. There was no love in the potions master's actions. Harry stopped moving.
Severus didn't speak, instead focusing all of his energy in finding a quick, forceful release that he knew Harry's body could supply. His hips worked as rapidly and as firmly as they could. The warmth and tightness of Harry surrounded him. He couldn't see Harry when he looked down, only something he wanted to hurt. Severus finished quickly on purpose. He grunted spilling himself inside of the man he was so angry with. He withdrew without notice, paying no heed to Harry's protest. He pulled his pants up around his waist and looked down at the very confused man below him.
"We can't because the thought of where you learned to enjoy that is revolting to me." The older man snapped. "I'm far too aware of who introduced you to the pleasure of pain. I don't want his leftovers." Severus removed himself from the bed. "Don't leave the rooms. I have things to do. And clean yourself up; perhaps you can manage to wash a bit of that desperation off." He was gone before Harry could speak.
Harry's head dropped to his pillow, tears falling from his eyes.
HHH HHH HHH
Harry had woken for the second time hours ago. It was passed dinner, he'd eaten with assistance from Dobby. From the Marauder's Map he had seen that Severus had not left the lab that was connected to the potions classroom. He would normally be home and getting ready for bed now.
Harry paced the hallway anxiously, a path he had walked hundreds of times that day. How could Severus have been so cold with him? How could he have been so cruel? Harry had never expected to be treated the way he'd watched Severus treat Mathias and Regulus.
He felt used and disregarded. Tears poured from his eyes as they had most of the evening. He'd been surprised when his attempt at a silencing charm had been successful. He wouldn't allow Snape the satisfaction of hearing him cry should he return.
Harry was losing his mind. Severus had used his body, not unlike Marius. He started to pour himself a drink but decided instead to return to the couch with the bottle. He downed much of it as quickly as he was able, savoring the burn in his throat. He felt like garbage. His attempt to find solace in the amber liquid proved ineffective as the hours ticked by.
SSS SSS SSS
Severus refused to leave his lab. He couldn't look at the man he had hurt that morning. He couldn't bare the pain that he was sure to find in the boy's eyes. He could feel Harry's anxiety and sadness. It was overwhelming. The younger man felt unstable. It was growing more worrisome.
Severus cursed himself when all he could do was sit on the cot he kept tucked against the wall. He couldn't bring himself to face what he'd done. He couldn't comfort Harry, even if he was in desperate need of it. He couldn't send Hermione or Ron, Harry would be too embarrassed to tell them why he was troubled. He would not ask Black as he did not feel like listening to the endless rant the mutt would subject him to.
Severus dropped his head against the stone wall. This was his fault. He should not have lost control. It was unacceptable. It was his job to ensure Harry's safety, despite the fact that he hated his options. He had to make sure that his bonded was alright after the trauma of the morning. A problem of his own creation required an action that made Severus physically ill.
If he could not go clean up his mess, there was only one other choice for this particular situation. He tossed an empty bottle of fire whiskey against the wall before kneeling before his fireplace, whispering the spell to make a fire call with a snarl. It was the very least he could do after the wrong he had committed.
DDD DDD DDD
Severus found the blonde laying on his bed, staring into a book. He did not seemed surprised by the face in his fire.
"Go to my rooms. Help Harry. If you do anything inappropriate you'll never again see the light of day," his voice was dark.
"You're not very foreboding when you're not actually here Uncle Sev." Draco didn't look up from his reading. "Do you really believe that I'm going to walk into one of your traps? It's not even a half-assed attempt..."
"Draco!" The face in the fire bellowed. "I'm currently in my lab, not my rooms. Do you think any part of me wants you near Harry? I've done something and he needs help. My only option is you. Now go. Don't let the canine's see you leave. The password is Gemini. Remember my warning." Severus disappeared.
Draco was on his feet and moved swiftly and silently through the rooms, making it to the hallway unnoticed. What had Severus done? What could possibly be so bad that he would allow Draco to see Harry? He could feel Harry's distress the closer he got to Snape's door. It caused the man to pause.
It was the first time he had felt Harry. It was the first time he'd felt any magic since binding himself to Potter. Part of him beamed with the knowledge that he would soon lay eyes on his lover. He did not hesitate stating the password and rushing inside. Harry had to be alright. He was so close to being free.
Draco didn't stop moving when Harry's drunken eyes bolted up at his entrance. Draco was by his side, pulling him into a tight embrace, taking notice of his tear stained cheeks.
"Harry... Love, what happened?" The Slytherin ran his hand through the dark, unruly hair.
"You can't be here." Harry cried but did not pull away. "He'll kill you if he..."
"Shhh... Baby he sent me. He said you needed help. He wasn't pleased about it but he ordered me. It's ok... I promise that it's ok... you just have to talk to me." If Draco wasn't so concerned he would not have been able to hide the smile on his face. The man he loved had melted into his arms. Feeling him there was right. He had missed him an unimaginable amount in the last two days.
There had been so many times he'd turned to speak to the Gryffindor, only to remember that they had returned home and his constant companion was gone. He savored the feeling of being close to his lover. He could sense his magic growing by the second, full of Harry's essence. It was heaven to feel so much of the man at once.
"He sent you?" Harry sobbed, grasping at his second love. "Drac... Gods I've missed you... everything's fucked up... he... I can't... hold me...please just hold me? Tell me you love me... I don't know what to do..." Harry began to gasp for air, his panic rising. How had his life turned into this? He breathed in the clean smell of Draco, attempting to allow himself to relax.
"Of course I love you... Harry, come here..." Draco was worried. Where was the strong man he had fallen in love with? Where was the braveness that Harry Potter was known for? He gathered Harry further into his arms. "Shhh... what's happened?" Draco took in Harry's face with love in his gray eyes. "Gods Harry you're so beautiful. You have no idea." He kissed the lightning bolt scar, keeping his lips there.
"I'm not... I'm disgusting... I'm...fuck..." Harry tried to rid himself of his tears. "He hates me." Harry whispered. "He hates me and it makes me so sad and he won't let me see you, which is bloody killing me...but it's also unbearable that he doesn't love me anymore and I'm hurting everyone and I just can't..." His hyperventilation had returned.
"You must calm down Harry. You sound ridiculous. Why would you ever think you were disgusting? You're the most amazing thing I've ever seen..." Draco tried to soothe. What was going on? What had happened here?
"He told me...when I got home and then this morning he...Gods I can't tell you..." Harry cried. "I can't tell you. I can't handle anymore hatred..."
"I could never hate you Harry. I love you. I know that he is your bonded. You haven't hurt me... you know that the last month has been the best of my life. Now please tell me Baby...tell me what happened..." Draco pleaded. He was getting scared by Harry's state. He had seen the man drunk plenty of times in the cabin, he was never like this.
Harry sighed, letting it all go. Sobs wracked his body as he began to speak. "This morning he... I thought that we were going to have..." A blush rose high in his cheeks.
"Sex." Draco hid his jealousy. There was no time for such pettiness.
"Yes and he... he... held me to the bed and he... oh my god..." Harry was frantic.
Draco remembered the calming drought he had kept in his pocket since waking. There were moments he couldn't get through without it, without Harry. He uncapped the vial and held it to Harry's lips. "Drink love." He coaxed, pouring the liquid down his throat. Draco hugged him tightly. "Come on now... tell me..."
Harry felt the potion instantly. "He... held me to the bed...I just thought he was being rough but he... he used me. He fucked me...came inside of me... when he finished he told me I was... revolting... your leftovers and that he didn't want me... he left me on the bed... he hasn't returned. I am disgusting... he wouldn't have done it otherwise. I'm ruined." The boy's voice was small.
Draco was furious. His voice was a low hoarse growl. "He... he did that to you?" Draco was going to murder his Godfather. "That's..." Draco thought quickly.
"Baby...gather some clothes. You're coming to stay at Sirius's. Severus has no right. He's not safe for you to be around right now. Go on and get some things. I'm going to get a sobering tonic." His tone indicated that it was not up for debate. It didn't stop Harry.
"I can't. If I leave he'll never let me come back... I have to stay... he'll get better... I can't..." Harry began to cry again.
Draco thought quickly. He retrieved a sobering tonic from the liquor cabinet and placed it in Harry's shaking hands. "I'll return quickly. Just stay right here." He touched a rosy cheek.
"Don't leave..." Harry implored. His eyes panicked.
"I'll be right back. I promise. Two minutes. Just don't move. Take the potion and then I want you to think about the broom ride we took through the mountains... how high up we got... how beautiful it was... how calm you were... can you do that for me?" Draco tried to think of something that would keep Harry grounded. He was definitely on an edge. He needed to be pulled back.
"Yes." Harry shook his head and swallowed the potion. "Promise that you'll be back?"
"I swear love." Draco left quickly, not wanting to leave Harry for long. He rushed back to his rooms, bursting into Sirius and Remus's bedroom, out of breath from the short jog. They both sat reading.
"What's wrong Pup?" Sirius was on his feet. Concern covered his face.
Draco took a deep breath, thinking of the quickest way to explain. "Sev fire called me. He said he'd done something and that Harry needed my help. I got there as soon as I could and he was a drunken mess. I gave him a calming drought and a sobering tonic and he explained. Severus practically forced him to have sex, told him he was disgusting and disappeared to his lab. It's not safe for Harry there and he won't leave. You have to come convince him..." His speech was rapid. He was begging.
"Let's go." Sirius growled, heading out of their rooms. "Mooney would you be so kind as to head down to the potions classroom and cast a restraining charm for me? I'll be along shortly." Lupin nodded and headed out for his task.
Sirius and Draco rushed back to Harry. He was crying on the couch, his knees pulled to his chest. "Oh Pup..."Sirius kneeled down in front of his godson.
"Harry you're going to go with Draco. I'll let Snape know that I didn't give you a choice. I'm still your Godfather and I have to see to your safety. You're going to stay with us for a little while until Snape can control himself." Sirius hid his rage.
"I can't... I can't... I'm not allowed to leave the rooms... I have to stay." Harry cried.
"Harry James as your Godfather I'm taking this out of your hands. You're going to do what Draco says. He's going to help you get some clothes and he's going to take you back to our rooms so that you both can get some sleep. It is not open for discussion," His voice was unwavering. Harry nodded in defeat. He moved carefully towards the bedroom.
Sirius looked to Draco. "Take him to your bed. I don't want him alone. He'll do best with you. Just don't..."
"Say it and I'll hit you. Respectfully of course." Draco's eyes were cold. "I'd never put him in danger. I love him Sirius."
"I know. Get him to bed. Get Dreamless Sleep from Remus and get him to sleep. I have to go... pummel your uncle." Sirius rumbled.
"Any chance you'd let me help?" Draco already knew the answer.
"No. But I'll be sure he knows who's holding his bonded tonight." Sirius grinned darkly.
"Thank you. I'm going to go help him." Draco nodded and headed towards Harry. He found the other man tossing clothes in a bag in his bedroom. Draco attempted to not look at the large bed. Harry and Severus's bed. He didn't want to think of the moments shared on that very bed, or of the humiliation it had seen Harry endure that very morning.
"It's odd...having you in this room." Harry observed, pulling T-shirts out of his wardrobe.
"It's not so great on my end either." Draco quipped. He placed his hand on the small of Harry's back, rubbing his thumb in circles. "I'm sorry..." He didn't know what words to use. "...I'm sorry that this happened to you, after...I promised to protect you. I failed after two days. I was looking at the wrong brother." He couldn't help a quiet sneer.
"You came when I needed you. I was so...relieved to see you walk through those doors. I'm in love with two people." Harry mused. He didn't have the strength to care that he had said it aloud. He didn't particularly like Severus at the moment. "Thank you." He whispered.
Draco was surprised to feel arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. He did not hesitate to return the gesture. "Don't thank me. It is my duty as well as my privilege," his tone was strong.
"I want to kiss you," Harry said abruptly. "I haven't kissed you in too long."
The blonde shivered at the thought. "You haven't. I agree, but not here. It's disrespectful... and weird." He picked up Harry's large bag. "Let's go. We both need to rest. I don't want to be here anymore."
Harry stared at the bed, his eyes filling with tears. "Me neither." Draco grabbed his hand, leading him away.
SSS SSS SSS
"Remus, please return to the boys. They're in our rooms. Snivillus and I need to have words." Sirius looked at Snape's bloody lip. Remus had already taken his revenge. The man had stopped struggling against his magical restraints.
"Of course. I'll make sure they get all tucked in." Remus left in a hurry.
Sirius threw several rage fueled punches before he spoke. It happened in a blur, momentarily blinded by his rage. Snape took them without debate. He felt he deserved worse. "You assaulted my family... my Godson... he's like my son Severus! What were you thinking?! At least we know where Marius comes by it!"
Snape didn't argue. He found himself wishing that he could be killed. "You won't be seeing him until you get a hold of yourself, bond be damned. He will be staying with Draco where he is safe. You will stay the fuck away from both of them or I will find a way to end you. If you were able to be killed Snape I swear that I would. Get your shit together, get over whatever the hell your problem is and remember how you're supposed to treat him or you'll never see him again. I will throw you in a stasis charm where you'll stay. Do you hear what I'm fucking saying to you?!" Sirius hit him again, feeling satisfied when he heard the crack of a breaking nose. "You had no right!"
"Take him..." Snape pleaded. "Take him until I am able to care for him properly. I entrust him to you Sirius." The darker man appeared hollow, lost. "I love him Sirius, I can't believe I...I don't want to hurt him..." His eyes didn't leave the floor.
"You already have! You all but raped him!" Sirius roared, releasing the restraints. "Snape get it together before you lose him! You do remember that The Congregate can end your bond if they find you unfit? What would become of you then?
"He saved your soul! With my blessing! I made the mistake of believing you were capable of change." Black shook his head. "I spoke on your behalf. I convinced James...this is how I'm repaid? I'm leaving him in the hands of a good wizard while you figure out what it is you want. Your anger...or Harry."
"Please put him in a separate room from Draco..." It was all he could say. He'd already checked the bond several times to see if it remained. To his surprise it had. He was sure that The Old One's would have dissolved it after the events of the day. Snape didn't care where he went if he didn't have Harry.
"He needs to be watched thanks to you. He'll be sharing Draco's room and don't you dare say another word about it." His voice was low. He grabbed a handful of black hair, forcing their faces together. "He deserves to be loved, which is exactly what he gets from Draco."
"They haven't seen fit to end the bond so whatever joy you're getting by playing matchmaker will be short lived." Snape couldn't resist the urge to retort.
"I will return him to you when I feel that it's safe and it will be your last chance." He spat. His voice was laced with venom. "The Congregate shouldn't be the only thing you worry about. He could choose to leave you. He's done it before for less; I would not push him to return this time. No one would." Sirius promised.
That had not occurred to Snape. Harry could decide to leave to whatever extent the bond would allow. "I'll fix this Sirius. You have my word." He was ashamed, defeated.
"Prove it." Sirius said as he retreated. He was surprised he had not been met with more resistance. He could hear Snape's quiet cries as he left.
HHH HHH HHH
"Lay down love." Draco guided Harry into his bed. He did as he was told. He was too tired to argue with anyone. He just wanted to be safe. Draco crawled in behind him after placing a vial of dreamless sleep on the bedside table. He relished the feeling of Harry resting in his arms, a feeling he never thought he'd be blessed with again. "I've missed you beyond words Baby."
Harry smiled a little, feeling calm for the first time all day. "You're always saving me."
"I always will. Take the potion Harry. Sleep. I'll be right here." Draco was overjoyed when the lights disappeared after he whispered nox.
"I love you." It was the softest of whispers issued from Harry's lips. He brushed them against Draco's, craning his neck. The kiss was brief but needed by both parties.
"I love you." Draco squeezed him closer. "We'll get you through this." Harry pushed back against his lover.
"I'll have to go back... when he calms down... he's my bonded." Harry said with fear. He didn't know what he was doing. He was so torn. He loved Severus with all that he had. He didn't understand how he could feel the same for the man holding him. He hated himself for hurting two amazing men.
"I know. You won't be going back until he's back to himself, and I for one plan to enjoy every moment with you. Now sleep. We'll talk more in the morning." Draco commanded.
"You'll stay with me?" Harry sounded strong. He rolled over and cuddled his face into Draco's chest, feeling the potion start to kick in. He just wanted to feel close.
"I'd stay with you forever Harry." With that both men drifted off to sleep, both pretending that there was no world outside of them.
HHH HHH HHH
"That was fast." Remus hugged his husband.
"He knew not to argue. We'll be keeping Harry for a while. Do not let Snape in unless I am home. He's not himself. We have to keep the boys safe. I believe Draco will be the best thing for Harry right now. He loves him. He'll get him through this and we'll help when we're needed. I'm going to speak with Atheena about her brother in the morning."
"This is one holy fuck of a mess Sirius." Remus said sadly.
"You're telling me love." Sirius unbuttoned his shirt and fell tiredly to the bed. "I don't know what's wrong with him. I never imagined he would hurt Harry."
"He's possessive. He's never been able to handle emotional hurt. Are you sure removing Harry from his care was the wisest course of action?" Remus questioned heavily.
"Yes. I cannot allow Harry to remain somewhere that he is not safe." Sirius tossed his arm over his eyes.
"But putting him with Draco... rubbing it in his face..."
"It's for the best. I'm going to sleep. Join me. We'll deal with the details in the morning." Remus happily moved to lay his head on his husband's chest, falling asleep together quickly.
SSS SSS SSS
Severus sat with his back against the stone wall of his lab, his knees bent, his feet rested on the edge of the cot. A picture of Harry rested in his lap. A bottle of fire whiskey leaned in his hand, its contents almost drained. No, sleep would not come to him this night. Severus had only his demons to keep him company.
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