A/N: At killerbbb's request, we now have more! And a new theme song, too! (It turned out a little edgier than I intended, though)
Subtle VI
To the tune of Die Another Day. Google it.
A time to Live,
A time to Die,
A time for Asuka,
A time for Rei,
It's not my time to go!
A time to Sin,
A time to Save,
Another Shinji,
Another Rei,
It's not my time to go!
I'd sing song,
Another way,
I'd tell this tale,
Another day,
This is the only way!
---
Gendo was sitting in front of a desk, the chairman of SEELE arrayed before him.
"You have nothing to worry about, gentleman," said Gendo, calmly. "Project E is on schedule. Human Instrumentality will soon be complete."
Gendo's phone rang. Opening, he heard Asuka's exuberant shouting. He coughed to cover his surprise, and quickly hung up.
"Ikari?" one of the chairmen asked, suspiciously.
"Nothing of importance," said Gendo.
---
Shinji sensed something was wrong the moment he entered school, Rei in tow. Everyone looked at them funny, and Toji kept giving him the 'boo-ya' sign, whatever that might be. Sitting in his desk, he made sure Rei took her usual seat by the window, then sat at his usual desk. Asuka was singing something under her breath, which was unusual.
Shinji kept getting odd looks over the class, and Hikari turned up her nose and looked away. Shrugging, he tried to sneak over and hear what Asuka was saying. She had been gagged, he discovered.
Bemused, Shinji returned to his desk.
---
After class, Shinji was walking towards the apartment, Rei following, when Toji and Kensuke ambushed him.
"Hey guys!" they said, innocently. Shinji immediately knew something was wrong.
"What's up?" he asked, suspiciously.
"Oh, we just wanted to talk about you and Ayanami," said Kensuke, sweetly.
"And how you were able to lose your virginity before me," said Toji.
Shinji paled. "Uh… that was why they gagged Asuka, huh?"
"Yep. She was shouting in the streets."
Shinji turned almost as pale as Rei. Almost. "But… that's not what happened!"
"Sure!" said Kensuke, poking him in the side. "Then why were you in Misato's room together?"
"With condoms?"
"And why was there heavy breathing?"
Shinji remained silent. "We were playing a duet – that is in no way an innuendo! – because Rei could play the flute – also in no way an innuendo! – and I can play the cello, which also isn't an innuendo. And there were no condoms."
"Wait a minute," said Kensuke, "How was that last bit an innuendo?"
"I'm surprised pervs like you didn't notice it," said Shinji, crossly. "The point is, that Rei and I were absolutely not having sex. See? I said it!"
There was a silence. "Prove it," said Kensuke.
"Huh?" demanded Shinji.
"The school's putting on a concert showcasing everyone's music skills. You and Ayanami play, and we'll vouch for you."
A/N: Short, but I'm in a hurry. Tune in next time, for the... umm... another angel, a school concert, a twist, and Asuka continuing her Excel impression.