Disclaimer: I own nothing.
In A Heartbeat
By LilyxJames4ever
Chapter 35 – The First Date
Saturday cannot have come any faster if it had sprinted towards them. The morning of September sixth dawns freezing cold and everyone in the castle is shivering, albeit for different reasons. For some, it is the nervousness/anticipation of going to Hogsmeade. For the rest, however, it is because the fires in the common rooms had gone out and the House Elves still have to relight them.
Lily wakes up wondering why she is so excited and then she remembers what day it is. It is Saturday aka her and James' first official date. She wonders if he is as excited as she is about doing this. She figures so since he has been asking her for the past three years and she finally gave in.
She stands up and is immediately bombarded by Marlene, Margaret, and Alice, prepping her for today. Part of her wishes that they had not camped out last night but the other part is glad that she does not have to do this alone.
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James had decided to sleep in his old dormitory last night and when he wakes up, he immediately remembers why he had barely gotten any sleep last night. Lily and him are finally going on their first date and he is beyond excited but his nerves are completely out of whack.
"Are you okay, Prongs?" asks Remus, sensing one of his best mates being awake.
"Just nervous," replies James, shivering slightly. Remus looks at him concerned.
"Are you feeling okay?"
"F-Fine. It's just really cold in here."
Remus feels his forehead and nearly yelps in pain.
"Prongs! You're burning up!" he shouts. "You have to go to the Hospital Wing –"
"NO. Poppy will make me stay there for the day and I am not canceling my first official date with Lily again! Besides, who gets sick in September?"
"At least go under the Invisibility Cloak and get some Pepper-Up Potion," implores Remus. "You won't be able to enjoy your first date with Lily if you're sick as a dog."
"Excuse me, I take offense to that," says Sirius, waking up immediately.
"You would."
"Can you go and get it, Moony?" James pleads. "I need to get ready."
Remus sighs and nods. "Where's the Cloak?"
James turns to look at Sirius who turns to look at Peter who looks under his bed and pulls it out. He throws it to Remus who throws it over himself.
"You guys take such good care of personal possessions," he says sarcastically.
"We know," say the other Marauders as one.
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Lily decides on a formfitting green turtleneck and a pair of her flower lined jeans since it is so cold today. Alice has also succeeded in helping her pick out a pair of shoes, Margaret in curling her hair for the occasion, and Marlene had put a light layer of makeup on her.
"Do you think I look all right?" Lily asks worriedly.
"Are you kidding, Lily?" cries Marlene. "You look gorgeous!"
"You're biased."
"Trust me, if you looked ugly I'd be the first to tell you."
Lily smiles. "At least I know that that's true…but are you sure -?"
"YES!" cry all three girls.
"Lily, James loves you in any form," says Alice.
"That's right," agrees Margaret. "Don't worry so much, you look great."
Lily smiles again. "Thanks guys. I'll never be able to say how much it means to me to have friends like you."
The four of them do a big group hug and then let go so Lily can take one more look before going downstairs.
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"Eurg, that's the most vile thing I've ever tasted," cringes James.
Remus feels his head. "But your temperature has gone down so a little grossness is okay."
"Says the person who didn't have to drink it."
"Try taking the Potion I take every time before the full moon and then we'll talk."
James cringes. "Right, sorry."
"Now quit your complaining and go meet your girlfriend," teases Sirius.
James grins and slides down the railing of the guys' dormitory staircase and runs to the Head dorm.
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Lily walks down the stairs to already find James waiting for her but looking into the fire.
"Hey," she greets nervously.
He jumps in surprise and gapes at her. She looks drop-dead gorgeous.
"Y-You look amazing," he stammers.
Lily smiles widely. "Thank you. You don't look too bad yourself." James laughs and that breaks some of the initial nervousness.
"So, are you ready to go?" he asks. Lily nods and takes his hand and they walk out of the common room, knowing that they will be attracting a lot of stares today.
Once they arrive in the entry hall that is when people really start to stare at them.
"Is that -?"
"Are they on a date -?"
"No way -!"
"Has hell frozen over -?"
"According to suicide statistics, Monday is the favoured day for self-destruction –"
"Well, we both knew this would happen," sighs Lily. "People really don't have better things to do than gossip, do they?"
"Nope," says James, shaking his head. "You'd think they'd be used to it now though. I mean we have been together for a while now."
They walk outside and feel the crisp, fall air, whip harshly across their faces.
"I don't think we've ever started off with such a cold year," says Lily thoughtfully. "Look! The leaves are already starting to fall off the trees!"
James frowns. Something seems unsettling about all this cold by the school but he cannot put his wand on it.
On the walk to Hogsmeade they talk for a while about classes and how the teachers are piling work on them so they are buried every second of everyday. They also talk about what they want to aspire to after they leave Hogwarts and about their friends.
"So, Sirius and Marlene seem to be getting stronger each day," smiles Lily.
James nods. "I've never seen him care for anyone so deeply before. It's almost strange…he's never held onto a girl for so long…"
"Really? How long has he ever been with a girl before?"
"A max of a week."
Lily's eyebrows disappears behind her bangs.
"Really? He's never had a girlfriend for more than a week?"
James hesitates. "I wouldn't go as far to call it a girlfriend…more like a – a fling of sorts." Lily bursts out laughing.
"Yes, that does sound very much like Sirius," she says, wiping her eyes. "I just can't believe that he is that much of a womanizer. It's insulting and degrading what he does to women by having sex with them and then dumping them."
"Not that I condone it, but honestly who am I to judge? I think Sirius feels like if he stays with one girl for too long that they may lose interest in him and take off. Kind of like how his parents abandoned him in more ways than just disowning him."
Lily nods. "I guess that makes sense but it still isn't right."
"How about we agree to disagree?"
"Good idea."
They walk the remainder of time in a comfortable silence, neither one speaking but knowing that it does not matter.
"Where'd you like to go first?" asks James once they arrive.
Lily grins. "Anywhere's good as long as we don't have to go to Madam Puddifoot."
James looks relieved. "I'm so glad you said that, I heard that it's all covered in frilly laces…"
"Yeah, it is and I'm sorry to say that I nearly barfed when I walked in. I usually don't mind pink to a certain extent but that's just over-the-top. It's like you walk in there and everyday is Valentine's Day."
James laughs. "How about the Hogs Head? It's quiet so we won't have to worry about younger kids and Aberforth can be a right laugh."
Lily smiles. "Sounds great."
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"Hey Sirius, can we talk?" Marlene asks him nervously.
"Isn't that what we're doing now?" he teases. He then sees that she is serious, however, and sobers. "Sure, what about?"
"Can we get out of here? It's too crowded, anyone care overhear." They are in Zonkos Joke Shop, which Sirius had insisted them going to so he could pick up the later pranking materials.
Sirius nods and the two of them walk out of the shop and into the busy street. Unsure of where to go, Marlene makes a beeline to the Shrieking Shack and Sirius follows her uneasily.
"What's going on, Marley?" he asks. She is twirling her hair around her finger, a habit she picked up years ago and one she only does when she is nervous. She does not even reprimand him for calling her by that name.
She sits down on the bench and does not respond, trying to collect her thoughts. She is not sure where to begin and only looks up when he sits down next to her and calls her name again.
"H-How's your Transfiguration project going?" she croaks, her throat suddenly dry. She curses herself inwardly for being so nervous.
Sirius' eyebrows shoot up and he looks at her in surprise.
"Erm – fine, I suppose. I mean working with Daniels is no treat but it's getting done…"
"What exactly do you guys do in the library?" she blurts out before she can stop herself.
Sirius' eyebrows contract and his eyes narrow dangerously. He seems to understand now what she is trying to say.
"What are you playing at?" he says coolly. "What do you think we're doing in there?"
Marlene flushes angrily and it is now her turn to turn defensive.
"I'm merely wondering –"
"No, you're beating around asking if I was flirting with her behind your back and the answer is no," snaps Sirius. "Why don't you just admit that you don't trust me?"
Marlene glares back at him but she can feel the knots in her stomach dissipate upon learning what she should have known and then tighten again. Why does it have to be so hard to trust him?
Because a leopard does not change its spots and she would be foolish to think that he will change just for her.
"Fine, I'm finding it incredibly difficult to trust you, Sirius," she says bluntly.
His heart skips a beat now that he has heard her admit it and he looks away from her. He knows though that she has good reason not to trust him but it still hurts to think that she thinks there is good chance that he will cheat on her.
"Sirius?" she whispers, leaning over and looking into his downcast eyes.
"What?" he asks more harshly than intended. Marlene winces but continues on as if she was not affected by it.
"I'm sorry Sirius, you know how hard it is for me to trust people and your reputation is –"
"My reputation isn't me anymore, Marlene! I stopped hooking up with random girls, including Kristina, months ago! Tell me, have you always felt this way or is it only because I'm suddenly not attached to your hip 24/7 that you're beginning to worry. Honestly, I'd like to know because I fear you have forgotten that I don't like clingy bitches."
Marlene gapes at him and stands up angrily. He counters her by also standing up, a much more impressive move by far. Somehow though she is still more intimidating than him.
"You take that back Sirius Orion Black," she snaps. "Never have I once been clingy to you these past several months and I am only worrying now because I know what Daniels is capable of!"
"And I don't?" he yells. "I dated her and spent more time in bed with her than –" He stops abruptly there, knowing he has gone too far.
He barely blinks an eye before Marlene is gone and running back up to the castle. He sighs and debates on running after her, ultimately deciding that right now he will only make her angrier. He just sided with the girl he is supposed to hate instead of his girlfriend.
Even someone as daft as Sirius at times knows that he is playing with fire.
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"How do you think Lily and James' date is going?" Margaret asks Remus as they look around Scrivenshaft's Quill Shop.
"Well, we could see for ourselves," grins Remus. Margaret's eyes widen.
"Are you saying that we should invade their privacy for our own self-interest?" she asks.
"Are you saying we shouldn't?"
"Hell no! Let's go!"
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As Lily and James walk down the street they attract many stares and not-so-hushed whispers from passing bystanders. While most are that they are shocked, some are not so nice.
"He still likes her?"
"He should be with me. I haven't been playing mind games with him!"
"That slut."
"Just ignore them," James whispers to Lily.
"I could care less what they have to say about me," she says defiantly. "They can whisper all they want but it's not going to change the fact that they're not the one's on the date with you."
"That's the spirit!"
Lily laughs as they reach the old bar with a severed Hogs head above the sign that reads the name of the bar and when it was established.
They walk in to find it completely empty, obviously taking a toll since Voldemort's reign is growing, except for Aberforth. He is behind the counter, wiping it down with a filthy dishrag.
"Afternoon," he greets James. He squints at Lily. "Ah, and if it isn't Miss Evans. For a while there I thought she was a figment of your imagination. You finally wooed her, huh?"
Lily stifles a giggle at James' expression.
"Something like that," he replies in a cool-about way. "Can we have two butterbeers?"
"Be right back," he says gruffly. He goes behind the dark curtain and James turns to face Lily.
"I told you that he's a laugh," he grins.
Lily smiles also. "Between him and Rosemerta…have you talked about me to everyone in Hogsmeade?"
James grins sheepishly. "Perhaps?"
Lily's only response is a smile before Aberforth comes back out with their drinks and James is about to pay him when he holds up his hand.
"If one of you two can answer this riddle then drinks are on the house," he says, smirking.
"Try us."
"Why wasn't Bertha put in jail after killing dozens of people?" Aberforth asks.
Lily looks at James intrigued.
"Can we confer with each other?" asks Lily. Aberforth nods. She leans over and whispers something in James' ear. He shakes his head but then she whispers something else and his eyes widen.
"Yeah, that's definitely it," he says, grinning. He turns towards Aberforth. "You shouldn't have tried to pull one over on Lily Evans."
Aberforth turns to look at Lily. "Your answer?"
"She was a hurricane," Lily states. "Am I correct?"
Aberforth grins. "Drinks are on the house. She's a bright one," he says to James.
"Tell me something I don't know," James grins, and Lily beams at the two of them.
"I'm going to have think of something much harder to test you."
Lily grins at James and mouths, "The fun is just beginning", making him grin too.
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"I wonder where they are," wonders Remus aloud. "We've checked the Three Broomsticks, Madam Puddifoot's –"
"I told you that Lily isn't one for frilly, frilly stuff," smirks Margaret. "Hey, let's try the Hogs Head!"
Remus shrugs. "It's worth a shot."
They walk to the bar at the end of the corner and peeks in the window. They see Aberforth, who appears to be thinking hard, and Lily and James laughing.
"They look like they're having a good time," says Remus. Margaret looks at him.
"Of course they are! They're practically made for each other! I wonder what they're talking about…"
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"All right, I've written a paragraph down for you," says Aberforth. He slides the paper to Lily and James. "There's something unusual about it. How quickly can you figure out what it is?"
"All right, do you want to do this one?" Lily asks James.
He shakes his head grinning. "I'd much rather watch you figure it out. He's given this one to me before."
Lily nods. "Once I'm done reading, time me." Aberforth nods.
"Gatsby was walking back from a visit down in Branton Hill's manufacturing district on a Saturday night. A busy day's traffic had had its noisy run; and with not many folks in sight, His Honour got along without having to stop to grasp a hand, or talk; for a mayor out of City Hall is a shining mark for any politician. And so, coming to Broadway, a booming bass drum and sounds of singing, told of a small Salvation Army unit carrying on amidst Broadway's night shopping crowds. Gatsby, walking towards that group, saw a young girl, back toward him, just finishing a long, soulful oration ..." (A/N: The above passage is taken from the book "Gatsby" written by Ernest Vincent Wright in the late 1930's.)
"All right, time me," says Lily absentmindedly.
Aberforth looks at his watch and begins timing. After ten seconds, Lily says:
"I got it. The letter "E" is the most commonly used letter in the English language, yet in the whole passage, there was no "E" used."
"You're good," says Aberforth impressed. "You beat Mr. Potter, here, by two seconds."
"I'm wounded," says James dramatically. "Well, I guess there's no doubt that Transfiguration is the only thing I can be better than you at."
Lily sticks her tongue out playfully. "Well, you have to be good at something." She winks at him and he and Aberforth laugh. "So, do you have any other riddles?"
"Hmm…this won't be very difficult most likely but I do have one new one."
"Try me."
"What is greater than God, more evil than the devil, the poor have it, the rich don't need it, and if you eat it, you'll die?"
"Nothing," answers Lily immediately. "Nothing is greater than God, nothing is more evil than the Devil. The poor have nothing. The rich need nothing. And if you eat nothing, you'll die."
James grins at Aberforth. "Told you she's brilliant."
Lily blushes and takes a sip of her butterbeer.
"You didn't lie. No one's ever been able to answer my riddles so fast," compliments Aberforth. "You've got a good head on your shoulders Miss Evans and it'll help you out in more ways then none."
"It already has," James murmurs. Lily smiles sadly at him and grabs his hand under the table and gives it a squeeze. He smiles and squeezes her hand back, trying to convey that, that simple movement has made him feel better. He notices her smiling too and knows that the message was received.
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Lily and James only stayed in the Hogs Head for a little while longer before they leave to wander around the rest of the village. Their next stop is Honeydukes for some warm chocolate on the cold day, and they take refuge in the shop for a while.
"Mm, I love warm chocolate," smiles Lily, and James grins.
"I can tell. I never realized how much of a sweet tooth you have."
"I really don't. Chocolate is about the only sweet I can bear. The rest tastes bitter to me."
"Hmm…I'll keep that in mind during your next birthday or Valentine's day," says James winking. Lily blushes.
Afterwards, they continue down the street and run into a very confused Margaret and Remus.
"Hey guys, where have you been?" asks Lily.
"Erm – down by the Shrieking Shack," lies Margaret.
"Why?" asks Lily. "Not exactly a cheering sight. I mean, - she lowers her voice and addresses Remus – you have to go there once a month for your transformations. I would have thought that you were sick of it."
"Yeah, why the sudden interest in going there?" asks James, looking at Remus closely as if x-raying him. Remus squirms.
"We just thought the view was nice," he says. "Besides, it's not a bad view from out here. It's just inside…"
"Perhaps we should go indoors," suggests James. "It's getting a bit chilly out here."
"Perhaps that's because the aura of the ice queen is coming closer and closer," says Lily, narrowing her eyes.
James, Margaret, and Remus turn to see Miranda walking towards them arm-in-arm with Kristina.
"Hello all," she greets.
"Don't pretend like you're welcome here," sneers Margaret, "when you're so obviously not."
"A little birdie told us that little Miss Slut was on her first date with Jamsiepoo," supplies Miranda. She looks at James and Lily and smirks. "Obviously the rumours are true."
"Well now that you know that the 'rumours' are fact, perhaps you can leave," suggests Lily coolly.
"Hmm…how about no? Come on Jamsiepoo –" she begins.
"Don't call me that," snarls James. Lily grabs his hand and squeezes it in hopes that it will calm him down.
Feeling her presence in a reassuring way does the trick and he backs down but only a little. This only makes Miranda smirk more.
"Come on James. You could have any girl in the whole school but you choose the one who never wanted anything to do with you? She's probably only going on a date with you to make herself look like she's doing you a favour."
"Don't listen to her, James," says Lily, trying hard not to show the disgust she is feeling. "Don't listen to the person who wants anything but the two of us to be together."
Remus turns to Kristina. "What are you even doing here?"
Kristina smirks also, glad to be getting some attention of her own.
"If you must know, Miranda and I met up earlier and we –" she begins but Miranda cuts her off.
" – Decided to become best friends," finishes Miranda.
"The insert 'match from hell' would be appropriate here," says Lily thoughtfully. "Especially since you two are all the other has in ways of friends. You don't even have significant others since you've been with every guy in the castle."
"At least we realize that Sirius and James will dump you and McKinnon when they realize how boring the pair of you are," jeers Miranda.
"Where is Sirius anyway?" asks Kristina suddenly, and Lily feels her blood boil to the surface. It has been a long time since she has gotten so mad.
"Probably off cheating on his leech of a girlfriend," mocks Miranda.
That sets Lily off.
"Shut your mouth you vindictive bitch," growls Lily. "Marlene is a million times the person you'll ever hope to be. Come on James, let's go."
She is about to turn around when Miranda grabs her arm.
"Oh no, don't you talk to me like that and then try and walk away," she snarls. She swings back and slaps Lily's left cheek hard. Everyone gasps in surprise.
"I can't believe you're making me do this but thirty points from Gryffindor," says Lily, internally seething. Miranda glares at her.
"Lily!" shouts Margaret. Lily turns to glare at her.
"What am I supposed to do? Let her walk off with no punishment?"
"You screwed us though too! You could always just, I don't know, slap her back!"
"Thanks for backing me," says Lily dryly. "Honestly, what example would I be setting if I slap someone? James, Remus, do you think I did anything wrong?"
James makes a face at being thrown into the crossfire and Remus shakes his head.
"While I hate the fact that we had to lose House points over something so pathetic on Harris' part, I see where you're coming from." James hesitates but then nods in agreement.
"Thank you. Now let's go."
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The rest of the day goes by uneventfully and Lily and James push Miranda and Kristina far from their minds. They talk and laugh about their teachers and their friends and overall, it is a successful first date.
"See? Going out on a date with me wasn't teeth wrenching, was it?" grins James as they headed back to Hogwarts.
Lily smiles sincerely. "You're right, it was actually delightful. I just wish I hadn't taken so long to say yes."
"I am," says James honestly, and Lily looks at him in surprise. She would have expected him to say the opposite. "It made it even more special. You were the one girl who wouldn't give into my act, Lils. You were able to change me for the better and I'm glad you didn't go out with that jackass and instead went out with me."
Lily smiles. "I guess I'm glad of that too but I think you're giving me too much credit. You have yourself to thank for changing. You are the one who ultimately decides if they are willing to change." She then grins widely. "Also, I wouldn't mind doing this again if you asked."
"I'll keep that in mind," he smirks.
They continue their walk to the school, jovially talking, neither noticing Severus lurking behind them miserably.
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She finally gave in is all that Severus can think of as he follows them. She finally gave into Potter's wishes and went on a date with him. I can't believe she'd sink so low.
Severus cannot believe that she has "descended" to the level of Potter. Somehow the fact that she has gone out with him now is even worse than them dating. He is such an arrogant asshole that had given Lily and him hell from the moment they met. When Severus had told her that Potter fancied her she had said that he was an bullying toerag and had basically said Severus need not worry since the feelings were not a reciprocated.
He had believed her, even felt reassured by those words until last year. He had noticed an increased difference in the way that Lily looked at Potter and definitely the way she looked at him, Severus. It is like the roles have been switched and now Severus is the big, bad bully and Potter is some saint to be praised.
It disgusts him that Lily has fallen for such a façade when it is obvious that Potter will only use her, use her heart, and then break it. He has to get to Potter before he can truly manipulate Lily. It is the only way to protect her and protect her, he will, especially since he failed her at the Malfoy Manor.
As they continue walking up the steps to the entry doors, Severus changes routes and heads towards the Forbidden Forest, the place he knows all too well.
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When Lily and James enter the common room, they see it is full of sixth and seventh years that had, had no interest in venturing into the town today.
"Today was great," says Lily smiling widely.
"So it was worth finally giving in to me?" jokes James.
Lily pretends to think hard. "Yes, I believe it was, Mr. Potter."
He bows to her and kisses her hand, attracting many odd stares. Lily blushes but smiles all the same.
"I'll see you later, I'm going to go up and see if Alice and Marlene have returned yet," she says. She runs up the girls' dormitory stairs in a hurry.
James watches as her blazing red hair disappears around the corner and sighs. Date one a success…
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"So, how was your date?" Alice asks later that night after dinner.
They are sitting in the Heads common room, which is considerably smaller than the Gryffindor common room. That is to be expected though since it is made for two people and not hundreds.
"Good if you look past the whole Miranda and Kristina showing up halfway through," grimaces Lily.
Alice looks concerned. "What -?" she gasps. "Lily, what's that mark on your cheek?"
"The place Miranda's hand connected to."
Alice stares at her incredulously. "Tell me everything."
Lily tells her everything that happened, starting with James and her walking to Hogsmeade.
"It was great, Al," she smiles, reminiscing. "I felt a real connection between us that I've never felt before and that I can't explain."
"Lily Evans can't explain something? It must be a sign of the apocalypse!"
Lily sticks her tongue out in response.
"Anyway," she continues. "Later on we met up with Remus and Margaret and then Miranda and Kristina showed up, arm-in-arm."
"Ah, never a more perfect pair," smirks Alice.
"You could feel it drop ten degrees when she came over. Miranda was really the only one who talked though and it was just insulting Marlene and I."
"Wow, she's really matured with age," says Alice dryly.
"The only time Kristina really spoke was to ask where Sirius was and Miranda continued insulting Marlene and I just got so fed up with her," said Lily, practically spitting fire. "So I called her a vindictive bitch –"
"Good on you."
" – And that's how I got this," Lily indicates to her cheek. "It doesn't matter though. I mean, I did take thirty points from Gryffindor…"
"The others must have been thrilled about that," laughs Alice.
"Margaret certainly wasn't and she made that perfectly clear. Remus and James though…they made it clear they weren't thrilled but both backed up my decision. I'm sure if Sirius had been there he would have wanted me to slap her back instead because you know how much he loves catfights. Remember Dorcas and Margaret?"
"How could I forget?"
-Flashback-
"So, you and Remus seem to be spending a lot of time together, huh?"
"Jealous?"
"Not really. I just hope you know that Remus doesn't stay with any girl for too long."
"Why's that?"
"Well, I know but why don't you ask your boyfriend? Then again, clearly you're not that special to him if he hasn't told you already."
"Take it back."
"Take what back?"
"Guys, stop!"
"Moony, you are one damn lucky dude."
"Are we going to do anything?"
"I'll go get some popcorn – alright, alright."
"Are you guys okay?" asks Remus, looking at the pair of them. Margaret nods and walks up the girls' dormitory stairs and slams her door shut. Dorcas follows suit seeing as they share a dormitory.
"One of them probably should have gone the other way."
"I'm going to go up and make sure neither of them kill the other."
"'Night."
-End Flashback-
"Those were good times," laughs Lily, and Alice is laughing also. "Well, not really but they're funny now to look back at now that we're friends with Dorcas again."
"That's for sure," Alice nods. "Do you know where Marlene is?"
Lily shrugs. "I haven't seen her since this morning. Something tells me I probably don't want to do my rounds any time soon." Lily groans and stands up. "Too bad Professor McGonagall would have my head."
Alice laughs and walks out with Lily to the common room. They walk over to where the Marauders and Frank are sitting, minus Sirius. Lily groans.
"We have to do rounds and neither Sirius nor Marlene are here," she explains. James makes a face.
"I hope to Merlin we don't have another run in with them," he whispers to Lily.
"Secrets, secrets are no fun unless you share with everyone," sings Alice.
"Trust me, this type of secret is best kept one," says Lily wisely. "Come on James, let's get this over with."
They walk out of the common room, ignoring the stares from their friends.
"Do you think they're hiding something?" asks Margaret.
"Oh, most definitely," smiles Remus. "I suggest if it has to do with Sirius and Marlene, however, we don't pry. It may be something very disturbing."
"But secrets aren't fun unless you share with everyone!" pouts Alice.
"They also wouldn't be secrets anymore," points out Frank, much to Alice's annoyance.
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"You don't think they're in that room having –" begins Lily but stops midsentence.
"I hope not," replies James. "If they are though, I say we walk away."
"I told Marlene though that I'd have to go to Professor McGonagall if we caught her again!"
"Why'd you say that?"
"Because being Heads means we can't play favorites with people. We're supposed to be unbiased to everyone and not make exceptions. We could get in trouble for not giving them a punishment last time!"
"It wasn't like we were supposed to find them!"
"That doesn't matter! What if it had been Professor McGonagall who found them? Then what? Do you think she would have let them off with a warning and skip back to the common room?"
"Why are you so determined to punish our friends?" James asks heatedly, stopping in the middle of the corridor. "Just because they've had sex you only got laid once –" He slaps his hand over his mouth.
"I cannot believe you just said that," whispers Lily, tears threatening to fall. "Look, I'll go finish rounds. Why don't you just go back to the common room?"
"Lily, I –" begins James frantically.
"GO!" she screams. She turns on her heel and begins speed walking in the other direction.
James makes to run after her when someone grabs his arm.
"Let her go, Prongs," says Sirius. "She'll only become angrier if you go chasing after her trying to act like her 'knight in shining armour'."
"I'm an eejit, Pads," James groans. "Just throw me off the Astronomy Tower right now, please!"
"We already knew that Prongs and as appealing as that sounds, Lily loves you, that's a given. You wouldn't want to commit suicide and get me arrested for homicide when we both know it'll be counterproductive."
"It doesn't seem like she loves me."
"If she doesn't have deep feelings for you, why'd she get so upset?" asks Sirius.
"Erm – perhaps because I just completely disregarded the fact that she was raped last summer?"
"While it may be a touchy subject, if she didn't care for you she would have stayed around to kick your arse like the old Lily Evans and not start crying and run off."
"The way you present your evidence astounds me."
"One of my greatest gifts."
"One of your only gifts," coughs James. Sirius punches him on the arm but laughs and begins walking back to the common room with his best mate.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
Lily runs down several flights of stairs, tears streaming behind her, and when she reaches the fourth floor she collapses in a heap. She does not know what is wrong with her. Usually she never lets what people say upset her but with James it is different. Perhaps it is because she has grown so close to him this past year…or maybe it is because the person you love tends to hurt you the most.
She gets up, brushing off her skirt and continues walking the corridors aimlessly, taking points from students out of bed but only halfheartedly.
Eventually she begins making her way back to the Heads dormitory, dreading having to see James but knowing that avoiding him will be impossible. Plus, she is not fifteen-years-old anymore. She does not hide from her "crush" or more if something goes wrong. She will just go on with her life regularly with as limited contact as possible with James.
"Lemon drops," she says to the portrait wearily. It swings open and she sees Marlene sitting on the couch staring into the fire. Her eyes also look wet but that could be the lighting.
"Marlene, what's wrong?" asks Lily, sitting down next to her best friend. She realizes her friend has in fact been crying.
Marlene looks at Lily. "I talked to Sirius earlier like you guys suggested," she whispers.
"And?"
"It went horrible. He got defensive and come to think of it, so did I. He…"
"What Marlene?" presses Lily. "What happened?"
Marlene just shakes her head but then looks at Lily properly. "Lily, what's wrong? You look as if you've been crying!"
"Don't change the subject!" she objects. She does not want to talk about James in all honesty right now.
"I damn well get to change the subject if I'm concerned about my best friend," snaps Marlene. Lily smiles weakly and Marlene groans. "Oh good God, it's James, isn't it? What happened? Didn't you date go great?"
"It did," says Lily. "But then…" She recounts everything that had been said, albeit somewhat awkwardly since it has to do with Marlene and Sirius.
"Oh Lily, I'm so sorry, this is all my fault!"
"No it's not!"
"Yes it is, if we hadn't been in that freakingly obvious classroom where anyone could find us you guys never would have fought!"
"You don't know that. Part of James and my relationship is arguing. It's what makes us who we are today and I don't think I'd have it any other way. Besides, he's the one who said what he did when I had in fact more than once, the second time against my will."
"I'm so sorry Lily," whispers Marlene at a loss for words. "It must be horrible to fight with someone you care so deeply about."
"That's it though, isn't it? We tend to fight with the people we care about the most and you have to have some feelings, whether it's love or extreme loathing, about someone if you can put so much into disagreeing with them."
Marlene smiles. "You're probably one of the wisest people I know, Lily."
"Thanks but I beg to differ since we both know Professor Dumbledore."
Marlene laughs. "Well, you're a close second. Come on, why don't we head down to the kitchens for a late night snack. I think we could both use a little excursion."
"You know I could never allow that!"
"Who says you have to? You could simply have been sleepwalking because you were still hungry after dinner and all."
"Enlighten me on what your excuse would be," Lily laughs.
"I saw you sleepwalking and I decided to run after you because I was concerned you would have a run-in with a nasty Slytherin by accident." Lily still looks uncertain. "Come on, we can get our stories straight later. Let's go!"
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
"So, how was rounds?" asks Remus when James arrives back with Sirius to the boys' dormitories.
James groans and bangs his head against the wall of his previous bed repeatedly.
"It didn't go too well," Sirius whispers.
"Really, I hadn't noticed," says Remus dryly.
"What happened?" asks Peter. "Weren't you guys happy when you left?"
"We were."
"What'd you do, Prongs?" asks Remus.
"WHY DO YOU ALWAYS ASSUME IT WAS ME WHO DID SOMETHING?"
"Well, was it not you?"
James averts his eyes. "No, it was." He groans. "Damn it Moony, I royally screwed up this time!"
"What else is new? Remember when you called her as good as a Death Eater? Déjà vü much?"
James scowls at Sirius. "Thanks Pads, you always know how to make a guy feel better."
"No problemo, compadre!"
Remus rolls his eyes. "So, what'd you do this time?"
James looked at Sirius who sighs and nods. James had told him what had happened on their way back.
James turns back to Remus and tells them what happened.
"Basically, I threw the fact that she had been raped at her without realizing it," finishes James miserably.
Remus stares at him for a moment. "You've said a lot of bad things to Lily, James, but this one surely takes the cake. What were you thinking?"
"I wasn't."
"At least he's not in denial," jokes Peter, trying to lighten the mood. Just then the door opens and Frank walks into the room.
"Hey guys – oh Merlin, what'd you say to Lily?" he asks, recognizing the grim faces.
"How the hell could you guess that I said something to Lily?" cries James.
"I've been living with you four for the past six years, please don't insult my intelligence."
"A fair point," nods Sirius. "He even knows to run out when we begin wrestling!"
"Well yeah, especially after that one last year! What was it that Sirius was going to say about you anyway, Remus?"
Remus winces and Sirius gapes at Frank, shocked that he could even remember that, let alone care about it.
"I honestly don't remember," says Remus simply. "I'll be back in a little bit, I'm going to go visit Margaret."
The others nod and are silent as he walks out of the room and down the stairs.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
"Mm, I love chocolate chip cookies!" cries Lily. Marlene grins.
"And you didn't wanna come here," she smirks. Lily sticks out her tongue and hops onto the counter just as the house elves come with more cookies and a large chocolate cake.
"You made them bake a cake?" cries Lily.
Marlene shrugs innocently. "What's the harm? We're both hungry and depressed."
"Speak for yourself, I'm not depressed!"
"Really? I think the gallon of milk you just drank and the dozen of cookies speak otherwise."
"I was hungry!"
"My point exactly. Thank you," says Marlene, as the house elves put the food next to Lily. They bow and retreat to their respective corners.
"We're going to get fat," murmurs Lily.
"I'm already there."
"No you are not!" Marlene raises an eyebrow. "Don't give me that look! You are not fat!"
"Sirius said so last year."
"Sirius was and is a git who says stuff that isn't true just to get a rouse out of people. Don't take what he said seriously!"
Marlene shrugs and eats a brownie.
"You never told me what he said," Lily says, changing the subject slightly.
Marlene is silent as she takes a drink of some butterbeer.
"I'll backtrack so it makes more sense in context," she whispers.
-Flashback-
"H-How's your Transfiguration project going?"
"Erm – fine, I suppose. I mean working with Daniels is no treat but it's getting done…"
"What exactly do you guys do in the library?"
"What are you playing at? What do you think we're doing in there?"
"I'm merely wondering –"
"No, you're beating around asking if I was flirting with her behind your back and the answer is no. Why don't you just admit that you don't trust me?"
"Fine, I'm finding it incredibly difficult to trust you, Sirius."
"Sirius?"
"What?"
"I'm sorry Sirius, you know how hard it is for me to trust people and your reputation is –"
"My reputation isn't me anymore, Marlene! I stopped hooking up with random girls, including Kristina, months ago! Tell me, have you always felt this way or is it only because I'm suddenly not attached to your hip 24/7 that you're beginning to worry. Honestly, I'd like to know because I fear you have forgotten that I don't like clingy bitches."
"You take that back Sirius Orion Black. Never have I once been clingy to you these past several months and I am only worrying now because I know what Daniels is capable of!"
"And I don't? I dated her and spent more time in bed with her than –"
-End Flashback-
"He didn't," gasped Lily, and Marlene nods. She looks down at the now crushed cookie in her hand. "I'm so sorry Marlene, he had no right defending her."
"I don't think he meant to but it came out before he could stop it," she whispers. "That's not it though. After dinner he suddenly disappeared…"
"Yeah, I noticed he wasn't there when I looked for you," says Lily confused. "Please, continue."
"Well, I went looking for him after and…" Marlene sighs. "I thought I saw him in the library working with Daniels on their project."
"Well, that's not horrible –" Marlene shakes her head.
"She was flirting with him again and…he was letting her."
If Lily's jaw had not been attached to her head it would have fallen off then. She cannot believe a word she is hearing.
"He was – no, that can't be, Marlene! He was so adamant that he won't stand for that at the welcome feast!"
"Something's obviously changed," she says softly. Lily shakes her head.
"No, there has to be an explanation."
"I can't even explain it, Lily. I got…so mad when I saw her flirting with him and remembered the flings they had constantly up until this year…"
"I don't blame you, I'd be furious too if I saw someone flirting with James."
Marlene nods. "Anyway, I wasn't exactly subtle –"
"That never has been a strong suit of yours."
" – And I marched over to where they were and basically kicked her out. Merlin, Lily, I could kick myself because her face showed blatantly that I did what she hoped I would do."
"After, I demanded to know what they were talking about from Sirius and he kind of looked at me strangely and said it was about History of Magic. That's the best part, it wasn't even Transfiguration. I know that's a load of bullshit though, he always sleeps in History of Magic! No, it has to be about something more than that."
"Or she could simply be just looking for an excuse to talk to him, in which case I think you should let it be."
"Why?"
"You're worried that he'll go for her and dump you, right? I'm convinced that if Sirius loves you half as much as he says he does, he would never go after Kristina. She's a 'been there, done that' and I can tell that by the way he looks at you, he doesn't want to go back."
"I hope you're right, Lily," says Marlene worriedly, "because I don't think I would be able to take losing him. Not after all we've been through."
"So, did you guys have a fight again?"
Marlene hesitates. "Yeah. It ended with us getting nowhere though. By that point Madam Pomfrey had kicked us out though…"
"I'm sure he only brushed you off because he was still pissed that you were questioning his loyalty. By tomorrow he'll be over it and you guys will be fine again."
"I hope so." Marlene bites down on her lip as the door to the kitchen opens. The two whip around but relax when they realize it is only Remus.
"Evening ladies," he greets.
"Hey Remus," they chorus.
"How come you're down here and not with Margaret?" Lily asks. "Not that we're not happy to see a friendly face."
Remus smiles. "She decided to turn in and I was feeling a little claustrophobic in our dormitory. Frank had come in and he was wondering what Sirius almost admitted during that wrestling match last year."
"Oh, Merlin," murmurs Marlene. "What'd you do?"
"Feigned not remembering and left saying that I needed to take a walk," laughs Remus. He cuts a piece of the cake and puts it on a plate for himself. "So, what are we talking about?"
"The eejit guys we're dating," snickers Lily. "Feel free to jump in at any point."
Remus rolls his eyes. "Sorry, I can't relate since I'm straight."
"That rhymed!" cries Marlene. Remus rolls his eyes again and snorts before turning to look at Lily.
"I heard what James said to you though and I don't whether you'd be glad or not to know that even he realizes he was out of line."
Lily looks at the marble countertop. "I don't know whether I'm glad or not either."
Remus sighs. "Look Lily, you and James have something special, there's no denying it because that would be just plain stupid. Yet for whatever reason, whenever you guys get close, one does something to make the other push away. It's been like a back-and-forth tug of war game from day one and it seems to be a recurring pattern for you two."
Both Lily and Marlene are silent; Lily contemplating what Remus has just said and Marlene watching both of them steadily.
"It's a hard pattern to break," whispers Lily. "Speaking for just myself, I know I must try to get him to push away at times because I'm afraid of getting in too deep."
"What are you worried about? James losing interest in you and finding someone else?" Lily nods. "Lily, you're crazy! I've never seen James so smitten with someone like he is with you!"
"Who the hell uses the term smitten?" asks Marlene, choking on her drink.
Remus throws a brownie at her, which she skillfully dodges with great ease.
"Who wants to play truth or truth?" asks Marlene, getting back to her original position. Suddenly the previous topic is forgotten.
"Let me guess, the whole game revolves around making people tell the truth," says Remus dryly.
"Ding, ding, ding! Okay Remus, I'll ask you a question first," says Marlene. "If you could take back anything that you've ever done or not done, what would it be?"
"Waiting so long to tell Margaret how I feel," replies Remus without batting an eye. He then hesitates. "And that I still haven't told her that I…that I love her."
Lily and Marlene look at each other with wide eyes and shriek so loudly that several house elves drop their frying pans. Remus covers his ears in pain and glowers at them.
"Tell her! Tell her!" choruses Lily and Marlene, and Remus groans.
"I've never particularly wanted my own Greek choir."
Lily laughs. "Come on Remus, you have to tell her or we'll explode. Just imagine how guilty you'd feel if you had to watch the house elves clean up our remains."
Remus groans and puts down his cake and pushes it away.
"Suddenly images of the fourth of July fireworks in America are going off in my minds eye, except instead you guys are attached to the firecrackers and you're lighting up the night sky.
Lily and Marlene look at each other.
"Well, I wasn't going to take it that far but that sounds lovely, I've always dreamed of being strapped to a firecracker and exploding for millions of Muggles," Marlene replies sarcastically.
"So, do I ask the next question?" he asks. Marlene nods. "Marlene – Marlene groans – who was your first shag?"
Marlene looks at him confused. "Sirius told you guys that way back when. Why do you want to waste a question on that?"
"Because I want to actually hear you say it," grins Remus.
Marlene scowls at him. "Chuck Blaire in our third year."
"Hmm, more than I asked for," smirks Remus. Marlene throws a cookie at him but he only catches it in his mouth. "Yum. Okay, it's your turn again."
"Lily…hmm I know too much about you," she groans, and Lily laughs. "Ooh, okay, would you ever consider marrying James if he asked?"
"I don't know! I'm only seventeen for Merlin's sake!" cries Lily. "Plus, I really don't feel comfortable answering that with one of his friends in the room!"
"Aw come on, I won't squeal," says Remus, genuinely interested. "Have I ever betrayed you?"
"No, but you're a Marauder so it's bound to happen eventually," says Lily, only semi-joking.
"Come on, you can trust me. I won't tell if you promise not to let on how I feel to Margaret."
Lily sighs and still seems hesitant but she gives in and nods. "Fine. I guess if he asked me…yes. Only though if I was ready and I wasn't seventeen-years-old and still in school!"
"Fair enough," grins Marlene. "Now all we need to do is tell James…"
"MARLENE!"
"I'm just kidding!" cries Marlene, jumping off her stool as Lily begins chasing her. "Remus, help me!"
"Nah, this is far more entertaining," grins Remus. "I'd love to see a Lily vs. Marlene fight."
"You've been hanging out with Sirius too much," calls Lily from the other side of the room. "I think he's starting to rub off on you!"
"Tell me something I don't know," says Remus more to himself than the girls.
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
"So Pads, why were you out tonight anyway?" asks James as they lay sprawled out on the Head couches.
"Why do you care? Are you going to report me to the Head girl?" he teases.
"Nah, I don't think she'll be in any rush to talk to me anytime soon."
Sirius laughs and swings his legs off the back of the couch so he is sitting straight up. He looks solemn now instead of joking.
"I was taking a walk. Marlene and I had a fight of sorts."
"What happened?"
Sirius explains what went down in Hogsmeade and then later in the library and how Marlene had reacted to seeing Kristina by him.
"To tell you the truth, Marlene's suspicions were right. Daniels wasn't asking me about History of Magic," says Sirius guiltily. "She asked me out."
"What?"
"I know. I obviously told her no and that's when Marlene came over and I lied to her. I didn't want to upset her."
"I think you managed that already, Pads," sighs James. "You should have told Marlene that. She's bound to find out and it'll blow up in your face one way or another."
"How's that?"
"Well, if Daniels goes and mocks her with it she'll be angry with you for hearing it from her," explains James. "But if you tell her, she'll still be angry that you lied to her in the beginning. If you had just told her straight out her anger would have been solely towards Kristina."
Sirius groans. "So basically it's a lose-lose situation!"
"Hey, you brought this upon yourself!"
"Thanks, I really needed that," says Sirius sarcastically.
"Sometimes things just need to be told how they are."
%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%
"You two should probably start heading back to the Gryffindor Tower and me the Head dorms," says Lily, catching her breath after chasing Marlene several times around the kitchen. "We wouldn't want to risk getting caught."
"Oh yes, we wouldn't want Miss Evans to lose her badge," mocks Marlene. Lily sticks her tongue out at her and pushes her and Remus out of the portrait hole.
"I'll lead the way and if anyone asks why you two are here, we'll stick to the story that Remus was also patrolling and you lost the time while studying in the library and I already reprimanded you."
"Why do I have to get in trouble?" sulks Marlene. "Besides, who would believe that I was studying?"
"Because you don't have a badge on the line and just go with it," snaps Lily. "Come on, let's go!"
They walk in silence towards the Gryffindor Tower, not meeting anyone along the way. They are almost there when they hear a slight rustle.
"What's that?" asks Remus, his werewolf senses kicking in.
"What?" asks Lily.
"Shh." They are silent and they hear the noise again.
"Lumos," whispers Lily. She points her wand down the dark corridor. "Show yourself! Is that you, Peeves?"
They see a figure reveal themselves and know it cannot be Peeves because they are walking on solid ground and have long, brown hair.
"Who's there? Show yourself," repeats Lily.
The figure smirks and comes into the glow of the wand light, only to reveal Kristina.
"What are you doing here?" sneers Marlene.
"I could ask you the same question," retorts Kristina.
"I was studying in the library and Remus was patrolling, as was Lily. Your turn."
"I was out," says Kristina simply.
"Detention, this Monday night," says Lily coldly. "Now tell us the real reason you were out."
Kristina ignores her. "How's Sirius?" she asks Marlene.
Marlene stiffens. "What's it to you?"
"Well we did use to go out and he is my Transfiguration project partner."
"You went out two years ago for a week and just because he's your partner does not give you the right to worry about him!"
"Like hell it doesn't! Sirius and I have always had something special and you've just gotten in the way of it."
Marlene snorts. "You and Sirius had nothing." Kristina's eyes flash.
"You'd better watch yourself, McKinnon. Sirius isn't used to having a long-term girlfriend, especially one as territorial as you. He might one day just get too fed up and leave you for someone else."
"Like who?" snarls Marlene.
"Me. Didn't he tell you that I asked him out today?"
Lily gasps and Remus groans. Marlene looks ready to explode.
"What shite are you talking about now?" she asks harshly.
"In the library before you stormed over to us," elaborates Kristina. "I asked Sirius out but he said no. I know though that it's only a matter of time before he caves in. You played your role perfectly McKinnon, acting the role as the overprotective girlfriend. Guys don't like clingy girls."
Marlene glares at her. "He'll never dig so far to the bottom of the barrel."
Kristina glares right back at her. "We'll see," is all she says. She smirks at the three friends' expressions and walks off in the opposite direction.
"That girl is a piece of work," mutters Remus. "She gives Miranda a run for her money."
"Are you okay, Marlene?" asks Lily concerned. "Sirius probably just didn't want to upset –"
"Save it," says Marlene, holding up her hand. "He lied to me and that's the extent of it."
"It's not that black and white, Marlene," begs Remus. "Don't do anything –"
"I don't care! We promised that we would tell each other everything but apparently he's above that rule as well! Well, he's going to regret lying to me, I can promise you that much."
"What are you going to do?" asks Lily nervously.
"I don't know yet but I do know that it's going to start and end with a little talk with Sirius."
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A/N: I got the riddle idea from PottedLilies story Raindrops, Flowers and Wishing Wells.