THIS IS MY FAVORITE CHAPTER!

Okay, I amend my previous statement. This is (arguably) my favorite chapter in the first book/story/whatever.

Read and tell me what you think! (Very excited right now ;D)

Chapter Thirty Eight – Ming

My progress in moving about is somewhat restricted with Kai now part of my alliance that kind of just mutually happened. He can tell, though, and has never asked to rest or stop, so I have to call when we should take a break, which is kind of awkward, because I know he's subjecting himself to a lot of pain for my sake. I've done everything I can for him without totally blowing what cover I have left, but it's not enough to take the perpetual look of pain out of his eyes, even if he can keep it from showing in his other features. Still, although Kai may think he's a hassle, his help and companionship definitely outweighs any cons of having him as an ally. I'd be dead ten times over if it weren't for his weird trader super-senses, which I still don't entirely get, but am grateful for nonetheless. He's also particularly good at finding food, no easy feat now, because it seems like the Gamemakers are pulling the drawstring on edible things left in the Arena. The Careers are surely well-off, eating their pre-packaged meals from the Cornucopia, feasting like kings – but it turns out that mudroot paste isn't as totally unappetizing as it sounds, and I would qualify myself as someone difficult to please, especially after the rich foods of Borg Tower.

Conversation, though, or any other normal non-Hunger-Games stuff, is strange to say the least. Kai and I both keep to ourselves, which suits me just fine, repacking our supplies while he stares at his leaves for hours on end. After a while it's grown a little comical, watching him scowl intensely at the small scrap of green unrelentingly, looking dead-serious, which I guess is in its own way a bad Games pun. Whoever is trying to contact him, do it faster!

As I start a fire Kai watches from the opposite side of our camp, leaning casually against a tree trunk like this is just a picnic in the woods. I can tell from his pinched expression that he's in pain, and feel the same guilty pang knowing I could repair his arm in an instant. You've already done enough magic in the Games! Any more would endanger the alliance, too. I don't want to admit to Kai my gift, or that teaming up with me may not have been a smart move. But he has those freaky-awesome trader skills, has he gleaned as much already?

"No deaths today?" I ask, trying to make conversation more than anything else, because today has been canon-free.

"Nah. Slow day. This'll have tided them over for the time being. Lots of good pictures of us gazing into each other's eyes at the campfire…"

"Ugh! You wish!" The Fire boy grins roguishly, then his smile turns into a wince.

"Don't pretend Borg isn't going to warp this like that…"

"I prefer not to think about it – don't incite anything or on your own head be it!"

"Consider me forewarned, darling." I roll my eyes and kick some more needles on the fire. Soon the air is filled with the smell of pine, strangely comforting in the darkness.

"Umm… Can I ask you something?" I begin, and Kai raises an eyebrow at me.

"Who said to not incite anything?"

I'm pretty sure my blush lights up the night sky. "That's not what I meant – mean – whatever."

"I'm listening."

"I just wanted to ask… What is life like in Fire? Really. I know there's the stupid competition-segregation thing, so you never get to know what living is like in other elements." Suddenly, I recall the interview my ally had with Chen. "I hear you have a rite of passage. Something with lions?"

Kai smiles, and I can tell he remembers his quip, too. "Well…" He sighs, then looks at me with a hint of sadness in his eyes. "My life, or just life in general?"

I shrug. "Either."

"My life, then." For a moment I'm surprised he chose the more personal option, but maybe it's a gesture of trust or something, I don't know. "My mom died when I was really young. They say she was ill, and that's what my dad said, too, and I hate to think he'd lie to me or anything, but there's always the question. To protect me or something." The flames cast shadows across Kai's face, maximizing the look of pain on his face, emotional and physical, until his face is a mask of anguish. "My dad was great. You probably heard that on the interview, that part was true. He traded, like me. Taught me everything I know – or what I didn't learn on my own." Extending his right hand, the Fire boy's lips twitch up in a half-smile. "Trading is illegal, everyone knows that. Death penalty. So one day… He got caught. All the male children in the family have to witness the execution and… I don't really want to talk about it, if that's okay."

"It's fine," I say softly, crossing my legs and leaning back.

"So it was just me and my sister for a long time. She knits and I trade her stuff, and I trade anyways… We got by. Pretty well, too, compared to some of the other kids in our position. Borg never caught on. Or maybe he did and didn't care. Or… See, this is how it goes. All the questions, no answers. But, yeah. Then Nya convinced me to go to school that one day…"

"Lucky thing, too." I mutter. "You probably saved my life."

"Sounds really dramatic and all."

"I know what you're thinking, shut up."

"You asked!"

"Fine."

"Fine yourself. Then the Reaping. And now this."

"Hmm."

"That was really unenthusiastic. How about your life story, huh?"

"You want me to cheer or something?"

"No, don't. Hate to bring any Careers on our trail." Reminding me that we are still in the Hunger Games, not just casually chatting at school.

"You asked for my life story? Here it is."

"I can hardly breathe for anticipation."

"You asked!"

"Touché. Continue."

"Kind of the same way. I dunno who dad was, Mother had a weird thing where she just wouldn't acknowledge he existed. Wouldn't speak his name. She died in childbirth, and my sister soon after." Kai doesn't say anything, which I respect, just dips his head. "So I guess we're the same in one way."

"And Darkness? What's it like there?"

"Nice, once you get how things work."

"Nice?"

"People always pick on Darkness, because they want to be higher than someone else. So we're the scapegoat. Okay, it kind of sucks, but only if you want friends or company or something."

"Which I'm guessing you don't."

"No. I prefer being alone."

"Go on."

"So… Darkness people, we have a mutual dislike for each other, so we all leave each other alone. And the other elements leave us be 'cause they're scared or something, so we're loners. Admittedly," I address the stereotype of Darkness, "There are some hardcore Darkness kids like you think of them. Okay, a lot."

"But not you."

"What makes you say that?" I snap back, maybe a little too quickly, because Kai withdraws.

"You're the mysterious one. How am I to know?"

"Can we stop bringing this up?" I huff, and the Fire boy laughs.

There's a few minutes of silence, where I tend to the flame and Kai watches the sky, which is speckled with brilliant stars. After seeing him, I look upward also and gaze at the celestial bodies.

"There's Orion's belt. He's a man from mythology. I learned it in a trade. Same with Hephaestus – I called a Nindroid that back in Borg Tower. Whatever, right?"

"Yeah." I say, more focused on the stars than what my ally is saying.

"Ming?"

"Yep?"

"The first day I met you, you were saying stuff about Borg, and the ideas forced upon the civilians about elements and stuff. At least, that's what I think you meant." My mouth goes dry and I anxiously glance at Kai, who is still looking up at the sky. "How do you think they do it?"

"W-what?"

"How does Borg does it? Gets us to hate each other, to divide the elements. Has anyone ever had a friend in another element? Seems common, right, like someone would eventually do it?"

"I guess…" I wonder where Kai is going with this…

"But I'm willing to bet no one has. Really. Do you agree?"

"I don't know, I think someone would…"

"Do you think? Borg would make them an example, and the civilians would see, and it would become a bedtime story. 'Now, kids, never be friends with other elements, or you'll be just like that man.'"

"Then the kids would wonder, and ask questions, and try it out just to see."

"I guess you're right…" Kai blows out a breath of air, and I can tell he's frustrated.

"I didn't ask for this." He points to the Fire badge on his jacket, and I subconsciously reach up and brush my own emblem with my fingers. "Did I get to choose? No. Borg chose for me. Borg chooses everything. And here we are, his perfect unquestioning little peasants." He spits the last word out like it's a curse. "They say the test is flawless. What if it's just another of his devices, to funnel us into groups, perfectly balanced so as not to rebel, to cause something to happen?"

"But the character traits…"

"You spend enough time in one place you adapt. It's a way of life."

"I doubt it. Too much of a change."

"Fine then. There is some aspect of filtering in the test. Satisfied?" His tone is so defiant and suddenly charged with anger than I can only bite my lip and nod. "Has he ever explained elements? What do they even mean? We display an aptitude towards one – what does that prove?" Again, I'm speechless, partly because his words make sense, to some degree, at least. "Can you summon darkness from your hands, Ming?" Yes, I think, and the irony strikes me as funny. Still, I've never met another person with my gifts before. "So can I make fire, too? Wave my hand and this flame'll go out?" Now I'm nervous. Borg is obviously watching, and to have a tribute question the basis of his crafted society, the elements themselves…

"Kai," I say, and he fixes me with a glare so intense I can almost feel its heat. And for the first time since we have made our alliance, I am afraid of him.

"No, don't you start. It's the labels that keep us apart, too. Don't you get it? All of the other kids at the school, all the civilians – Ming, that day at school, I thought you could think like I did. I thought you could see through all of this."

"Stop." I whisper, balling my fists, and am surprised to feel tears in my eyes, but Kai doesn't notice.

"That's what keeps us together, the elements, all cozied up with our group, who needs the others when we can have Borg…" The cynicism in his tone is almost tangible.

"Kai, stop."

"Well, you know what?" In one swift motion Kai reaches up and tears the badge from his jacket, then from his shirt, and tosses them in the fire. "I'm a Fire tribute, huh? Let the badges burn. See how he likes that. How good are your boundaries now?" He shouts at the sky, and I stand, now angry at him.

"Kai, stop." Our eyes meet, and as I stand there looking down on him the rage melts away, replaced by pain again, and the look is enough to make me almost cry. Slowly my ally leans back, collapsing from the absence of the anger that fueled him a moment ago. The tears sting my eyes but I don't break eye contact until Kai looks down, seeming so small and vulnerable now, and begins to speak.

"Ming." Now I lash out at him, snapping back at what he said.

"Oh, don't you start now, either! It's enough to get our sorry hides killed by blaspheming against god almighty Borg, but you have to alert every tribute in the Arena where we are by sending off a signal flare! Burn your badges all you want, see what good it does!"

"You're frightened."

"I – what?"

"I scared you." His voice is quiet now, and I look down at my muddy boots, searching for something to watch besides his face.

"No – it's fine, I'm fine."

"No, you're not. Ming…"

"Oh, don't apologize," I retort, and Kai takes a sharp breath. When he speaks again, his voice is slightly strained.

"The part about you not seeing past Borg… I didn't mean that."

"You did."

"No, I did not."

"What, you were just mad, or you didn't know what you were saying, or wanted to use me as an example? Forget it!" The Fire boy sighs, then grabs his knife and slides it to me.

"What's this for?" I ask, trying to keep the snip in my voice, but I can tell Kai wants to end our conversation. He knows I won't be consoled – at least, not now. Partially, though, I want him to try.

"Keep it. Prove me worthy of your trust again. And if the Careers come, I'm not much use in a fight anyways." Defeat laces his voice, but fine, let him feel sorry for himself. Big deal.

I gather my stuff and curl up with my back to the fire, facing the woods, and am glad that sleep takes me quickly tonight – I don't want to have to face Kai again.

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