Disclaimer: I don't own Firefly, Serenity, or TSCC.
Precisely measured steps echoed through the passageway leading to the crew's quarters. Derek slipped out of the galley, relieved to have missed Cameron as the terminatress left the bridge to visit John. Derek was not deceived into thinking Cameron had not registered his presence on her sensors, she'd simply chosen to ignore him.
Derek listened until the sound of John's door closing reached his ears before picking up the two mugs of hot tea and walking carefully towards the bridge. River had drawn the night watch. With the crew asleep or in their quarters, Serenity was quiet except for the reassuring low hum of her engines.
Conflicting emotions pulled the soldier in two directions. When Derek looked at River he could not help but see Allison and feel his lingering rage at Cameron for terminating the young woman. Nor could Derek ignore the attraction he felt to River, the desire to protect her and make things right in her 'verse.
Derek also knew the player in him viewed the pilot as a challenge. After all, how does one pursue a woman who is a reader, a trained assassin, and made it clear she desires a relationship with you and still wear the pants?
After working up his nerve, Derek ordered himself to walk with confidence onto the bridge. He was greeted by the sight of River sitting in the co-pilot's chair, her knees pulled up to her chest, and the toes of her bare feet protruding from underneath the hem of her long dress. With her gaze fixed onto a point in the black, River ignored Derek's presence, yet held her arm extended with hand held open to accept the mug of hot tea he'd brought her.
Without a word, Derek carefully put the mug in River's hand, sat down in the pilot's chair, and turned his gaze out into the black. River would talk, he hoped, when she was ready.
"Why does the soldier create conflict with the girl's twin?"
Not this Derek thought.
"Inner turmoil over extended periods of time is not healthy. The girl knows this firsthand."
"It's complicated," Derek answered, trying in vain to keep the hostility he felt from his voice.
"No, it's not. Cameron killed Allison. Twin thought it was the right thing to do. Under the control of the evil master Skynet, Twin had no other moral frame of reference. Now Twin knows what she did was evil. With the ability to choose now part of her code, Twin would make a different choice."
"River, Terminators are great deceivers. If Cameron told you she would make a different choice, you need to realize she will lie to you to achieve her agenda."
"Of course she could lie. Has lied and will lie again. You know I am speaking the truth. Explain to River how she knows what she has told you is true?"
In spite of his desire to avoid the issue, Derek considered River's request. "She has an agenda. To tell you the truth about this one issue fits that agenda. So I'll grant to you it is possible Cameron is telling the truth."
"The soldier is only partially right."
"No, I am right. River, you've only dealt with one Terminator, Cameron. You can't read her like a human. I've dealt with hundreds. I'm telling you, she could be lying, probably is lying."
Derek risked taking a peek at River. She was staring at him, her chin pointed towards the deck tilting her head forward. Big brown eyes gazed at him with the corners of her mouth curled upwards to form a grin oozing sarcasm.
"The soldier is more logical than that. You base many of your ideas about people based on their actions, not their words. Is the girl correct?"
"Yes, actions speak much louder than words."
"Based on Cameron's actions, what is her priority?"
"John."
"This shall be accepted as a given. John is Cameron's priority. Would you agree, based on Cameron's behavior, that the girl's twin loves her John?"
River's expression of hopefulness wounded the words in Derek's mouth, causing them to die on his lips.
"It depends," he muttered in frustration.
"If the girl's twin's love language includes saving John's life, monitoring his health, trying to make his life meaningful, and controlled applications of traditional affection, then it is obvious to the girl that her twin loves John. Does the soldier agree?"
"Yes, but…"
River interrupted, speaking as if Derek had not uttered a word. "The second given has been established. Would you say Cameron is being truthful when expressing a desire to become John's mate, to be his wife?"
"Yes, but it's because she wants to control him," Derek protested.
Ignoring the second half of Derek's response, River continued her speech.
"The third given has been established. Twin desires to marry John. Based on what the soldier believes to be normal logic used by a Terminator, it is logical to eliminate opposition to the third given by terminating the source of opposition. The soldier has made his feelings clear about the subject, yet Cameron has allowed the soldier to live and interact with her John. Is this not inconsistent with normal Terminator logic?"
Truth spoken in opposition to a dearly held belief can, and often does, cause the conflicted part to feel anger and Derek was certainly feeling anger. His face flushed red, causing River to giggle.
"It's not funny," Derek choked out.
"The soldier does not like the girl's logic."
"I came here to bring you some tea, not get ambushed. I don't appreciate this, not one bit, River."
"It is not the girl's intent to anger the soldier. Rather, she wants to bring resolution so her strong soldier can be stronger. So he can better comfort and protect the girl."
"Well, this is not how I would go about trying to accomplish that," Derek answered in a raised voice.
"The girl needs for there to be calm between the soldier and the twin."
Derek's face felt flush as the irritation caused by the truth River spoke rankled him.
"River, you mean well. I know you do, but you are messing with something you shouldn't."
"The girl knows how you feel," River snapped back, frustration pouring out of her. "You shout at Cameron all the time. She tries to make peace with the soldier! Told him about his child, has saved his life, cooked his meals, anything Twin can think of to build a bridge for the one bad act. But you won't let go of your anger! You won't forgive Twin! The girl cannot be with the man she wants if he is consumed with anger and bitterness that only he can resolve. Leave the bridge!"
Stunned by River's angry response and hurt by her sudden outpouring of tears, Derek found himself speechless. Once again, River was staring into the black, ignoring Derek as tears fell down her pale, white cheeks. The reader was alone with her thoughts and emotions, as if Derek didn't exist.
Numbed by her outburst, Derek turned and left the bridge. He traveled at a brisk pace to his bunk and hurriedly climbed down into his quarters. Without kicking off his boots, Derek sprawled on his bunk. Picturing River's tear stained face, Derek felt anger, so much anger. Anger at River because she might be right. Anger with himself for hurting this woman he felt he barely knew. Most of all Derek felt angry at life, for the troubles it had visited so unjustly upon him and those he cared about.
Rolling over to face the wall, Derek felt surprised by the tears welling in his eyes. Something he had not allowed to happen since he'd witnessed Cameron dancing alone in her room in L.A.
"I barely know River," he whispered. "How can that skinny little thing do this to me? What's wrong with you Reese?"
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Unable to sleep, the Captain had relieved River of her duty on the bridge. Returning to her quarters, she was disappointed to find Cameron gone. Wanting to talk to Cameron about the fight with Derek, the reader lay down on her bunk and focused her mind.
Picking up the box River used in her mind to store her link to John, she carefully opened it and peered inside. As River had thought, Cameron was with her John in his bunk. The pair had been engaged in "private time" until something had caused John to stop. River paused, hesitant to go further, not wishing to intrude on the emotional privacy of her friend via John's mind.
Unable to resist her curiosity, River reached a slight bit further into the box she'd made to surround John's thoughts. In seconds River learned John had stopped making out with Cameron not because she'd drawn the line as usual, but because John had sensed Cameron was upset.
Now worried about her twin, River probed deeper, searching for clues. It didn't take long. John was focused on comforting Cameron and reassuring her, promising as soon as mother Sarah was settled and the family safe, he would do right by her. Apparently, this had led to an unsettling discussion for John who was now concerned with how to deal with his uncle, Derek.
Saddened by her discovery, River closed the box surrounding John's mind and set it back on its shelf so she could wait for Cameron to return. Tense with frustration, River sat down on her bunk for a bit, knees to chest wondering how she would survive if the Connors left Serenity. Simon, as much as she loved him and depended on him, would no longer be enough for the girl to hold her mind together.
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Frustration and the ability to deal with it in a constructive manner was not one of Sarah's strong points as an individual. Control was the current source of frustration, or rather the lack of it.
The matriarch of the Connor family respected Captain Reynolds. He'd taken a big chance taking her family aboard, especially since he still did not fully comprehend just how dangerous Cameron was. The truth of the matter if Sarah was honest, Mal didn't know how dangerous her entire family was if provided with the right equipment and they held both strategic and tactical surprise.
If it weren't for the not so small matter of the vacuum of space, Sarah felt like opening Serenity's airlock and running away. Not being in command, holding the reins of power that gave her control frightened Sarah. Each day John came closer to severing the last ties that bound him to his mother. Ties that kept him from finally taking Cameron as his own.
When that happened, her purpose would be gone. Sarah would have no hold over Derek. With the apparent demise centuries ago of Skynet, Cameron had even argued they had won in their struggle to prevent the A.I. from coming on line, Reese was showing signs of wanting to live a regular life.
As much as Sarah hated to admit it, Cameron would have little need for her. As John went, so did Cameron. Without the certainty of the need to be ever vigilant, ever watchful, and most of all, ever fearful of what could happen, Sarah felt confused.
Heavy footsteps followed by silence and then a gentle knock broke Sarah's fearful thoughts, bringing her to the now.
"Uh, Sarah. It's me, Jayne. I'm goin' to do a workout. Was wonderin' if you'd want to join me, or at least spot."
Alone was the one thing Sarah did not want to be at that precise moment.
"I'd be happy to. It would help me keep my mind free of unpleasant things."
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Some forms of technology irritated Mal. The gorram Cortex was one of them. How John and Cameron had mastered it so quickly, flitting from one search to another amazed him. After nearly three hours of sitting alone on the bridge with Serenity flying by autopilot, Mal had finally found what he was looking for.
Unfortunately, it was written in legal language, which Mal believed was designed to confuse anyone with common sense, thus forcing the person to hire a lawyer who could understand the feng le language. The flowery decorations on the page surrounding the print annoyed the Captain. It wasn't enough he had to focus his weary mind to understand the confusing wording of what he read, the Captain had to deal with the unmanly distractions on the screen.
After another hour, Mal cleared the screen and leaned back in the pilot's chair. In his mind he tried to calculate how much money he had hidden away, some for the parts Kaylee begged him for and Cameron insisted he buy or else, some for the surprise.
Based on what he could understand of the confusing page, he was getting close. If the next job panned out and there were no surprises, he might have enough.
Simon had proven himself to be trustworthy. Perhaps he would get the doctor to read the page for him. Simon was smart and well educated. He would be able to decipher the contract language and help him figure out what he needed to know. Of course, the risk now was not Simon betraying his trust, it was River taking an unwanted look inside her brother's mind and blurting out Mal's secret.
He'd have to think a bit before making his final decision.
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Light from the passageway entered through the silently opening door, falling on River's eyes. She sat up promptly and ran to greet Cameron with a hug.
"Girl needs to talk. Will Twin talk with her? The soldier and the girl had a fight."
Without saying a word, Cameron took River's hand and led her to a bunk and sat down.
"What did Derek do?"
"Refused to be reasonable."
"That sounds like Derek."
Encouraged by Cameron's responses, River proceeded to sing song her way through the argument. Pacing back and forth, River vented her frustration, not noticing Cameron's reaction.
The sound of a single sob stopped River's pacing.
"Twin?"
"Derek is right to feel the anger he does. What I did was wrong. I didn't know it then, but I know it now. He is right to not trust Terminators, River. Everything he told you is true!"
"But Twin, you have never betrayed me. You have always told the girl the truth."
"I could go bad again, River. Everyday, I the terminate order comes up on my HUD. Everyday, I have to override it. I still want to kill my John," Cameron wept.
"Anyone could go bad, Twin! The girl could lose her mind again, kill everyone on Serenity. Jayne could get stupid and try to sell the girl and Simon to the Alliance again. Twin, can't think about that. Just make good choices!"
"I have to make peace with Derek," Cameron whispered, tears running down her face, frightening River. "It frightens me more now than before. I have you to think about now, not just John and Sarah."
