It's not much, and it's basically just a silly chapter that serves no purpose. But I just had a taste of Volterra craziness pop into my head.

So.. The story will continue, I will update as often as possible ... as long as I can maintain the spirit of the story. Because it's all about fun, really. And if I am in the mood to chain-smoke and scream at my neighbors, it will not benefit the story. So I won't be writing then. I'm trying to continue, but I will not just type mechanically. If it is too difficult to write, it doesn't belong in this story. This story is about random insanity and I have every intention of keeping it that way.

So, enjoy. I'll be writing more, I promise.

Much love to all of you for your ideas, support, encouragement, and um... demanding natures.

Twilam rocks, as usual. This Chapter is dedicated to twilam. Because of the awesomeness.

And to teamswitz09, because having someone go through my story and review every single chapter (practically) after I've had it on hold for so long really renewed the story for me. So, thanks for that.

As usual, each and every one of you is awesome. I love the reviews you guys send me. It makes me sad when I don't see many reviews in Fight For Me. But, I have to keep reminding myself to be patient because this story is on Chapter 37 now and it's on Chapter 5. So, if you haven't checked it out - please do so. It isn't as light hearted as this one by any means. Still, Yeah, I'll shut up, sorry, read away, I love you all.

Um, no el owno el twilighto.

Review, all 94 + 72 of you.

"SERIOUSLY, EDWARD! STOP!" I managed to giggle out through the tickle fest my husband to be was torturing me with. We had managed to sneak away while Esme was with the babies, of course, had I known this was coming – we wouldn't have. I'd had, er, other things in mind.

Suddenly, Edward cried out and the tickling ceased. Never one to miss an opportunity, I threw him on his back, sat on top of him, and pinned him down.

"Thanks, Jane. You can stop now." I heard a giggle from one of the connecting hallways and a few brief footsteps before we were alone again.

"Never mess with me, Edward Cullen." I chuckled, "You forget – I am straight gangster homie, and this is my turf." He rolled his eyes at my awful impersonation.

"Yes, Master gangstress, ma'am." Then he coughed out, "Cheater."

I raised an eyebrow, "Cheater? If I were a cheater you would've lost a long time ago, lovey." I said the last word with immense sarcasm – fighting off my laughter about the ridiculousness of our conversation.

"Ha! You said it out loud!" Shit.

"Prove it, Cullen." Another eye roll – totally symbolizing defeat.

"Yeah, Cullen." A manly voice attempting to be a girly voice mimicked me in the background.

"The enemy surrendered, D. Tell the troops to retreat." I giggled. I saw Demetri smirk out of the corner of my eye.

"NEVER SURRENDER!" Came out of the mouth of Edward, directly before he flipped me over and had me pinned – Bella style.

"That's my move, sweetheart. Not fair." I tried my best to pout and wipe the look of evil off my face. It didn't work – Edward looked both amused and terrified. Good, he should be.

Oh, Demmmmeeetttrrriiii

Yes, Bella-ella?

Show him what happens when you mess with your baby sister, please? I threw in a mental pout, just for fun. Quickly, Edward was flung down the hall and I regained my stance, smirking a little at my second victory of the day. Well, Jane and Demetri's second of the day – but I am so calling it mine.

"Don't mess with my sister, punk." It took extreme effort not to laugh at Demetri's impersonation of a macho man. Charlie would have been proud; Edward had a total what-the-hell-??- look on his face. I turned to Demetri and mock saluted, military style.

"Thank you, Soldier. You're bravery will be rewarded." He saluted back, ready to respond before we were so rudely interrupted.

"No, no, no, NO! You are doing it all wrong, Bella. You too, Demetri." A fourth voice announced as he approached. I huffed in annoyance before spinning around.

"Tell me, oh Colonel Whitlock, how do I do it?"

"First – I wasn't a Colonel. Second – Your fingers are curving, you can't do that, your angle is all wrong, and you aren't even positioning your fingertips correctly! They go here," He moved them off my forehead, closer to my eyebrows. "Push your elbow back, straighten out your hand." I was learning diligently the correct way to salute, but apparently Dem had another idea.

"Right. Sorry to interrupt your lesson plan, Colonel Whitlock, but I was sent in search of the lovebirds in hiding for a reason. Your –"

"Really? I found them, no problem. It was ridiculously easy, actually. Why do they keep you around anyways?" Jasper cut him off and I heard Edward snickering in the background.

"So it's easier for little sister here to stalk you guys." He shot back, nodding his head towards me. I rolled my eyes and fought off a smile – because it was so true. "Anyways, your kids keep chewing through the bottles and someone needs to run into town and pick some up. We figured you two should go – unless, you're too busy with the tickling war?"

"Nope," I said, "We'll go. But I get shotgun!" I screamed in mock excitement.

"Love, you realize we're the only two going right?" Edward eyed me skeptically.

"Yes." Duh, I'm not an idiot here.

"So –"

"Edward, when will you learn to quit questioning my actions?" I giggled.

"Probably never."

"Well, it's going to suck for you then. Most of the time, there is no reason at all. Like this time."

"Oh." He said, so cleverly. "Well, let's go get our 'uniforms'"

"No need, I brought them for you. Like the good soldier I am." Demetri smirked and saluted again – and judging by the look of frustration on Jasper's face, it was still wrong.

"Thanks, Dem. Is that all that's needed?"

"Yes, that's all us vampires will be needing from the human store, Colonel." He rolled his eyes.

"Sweet! I'm a Colonel now?" He nodded. "Go Bella!" I shouted before turning to Edward, "To the batmobile, Robin." He lifted one eyebrow at me and I rolled my eyes, "Hurry along, we don't have all day – make me wait to long and I'll actually make you wear the costume."

"You have costumes?" Jasper asked.

"Volturi, duh. I have everything." I gave him a you-should-have-known-that-you-idiot glare and he shrugged.

"Wait, why do I have to be Robin?" Edward piped in.

"Because I doubt you want to stay here while Demetri goes as Robin."

"I can't be Batman?" He asked, and I, along with Dem, faked a look of complete horror.

"Never ask that! I am Batman, always. It never changes. You can be Catwoman."

"Hey!" Demetri interrupted, and I chuckled.

"Okay- you might have to clear the Catwoman thing with Dem – it's kind of already his."

"Well, what about Nico? Who is she?" Jazz asked. Seriously, he had way too much to learn about what really goes on in Volterra.

"She is just awesome. She doesn't need a name, silly." I rolled my eyes, "If she decides in good spirit to use an alias, you may refer to her as Superman. But 'Your Awesomeness' will generally suffice when she isn't in the mood for Superman." Demetri chuckled while the other two rolled their eyes. Only Demetri knew exactly how serious Nico and I got about our games. He only really understood because he was always just as involved as we were – when he was around. He was our right hand man. Or right hand Catwoman, anyways.

"Colonel Whitlock, Lt. Volturi." I commanded in the most authoritative voice I could muster given today's mood. They both snapped to attention and saluted. Looking at the difference I could completely tell that Jasper knew exactly what he was doing and Demetri didn't have a clue. Because Demetri's salute sucked. "At ease." I said, fighting off giggles, "You must save Jake – I don't think he's been around Nico in a mood like this before. And if I'm in this mood, then – most likely - so is she." Demetri's eyes got a little wide and Jasper got confused. "RUN! Volturi, explain to Whitlock along the way." They both saluted and took off down the hallway. As we began down the opposite direction, I turned to Edward - who was looking at me with a million questions. "Don't ask, you'll see the damage when we get back – I'm sure. Nico doesn't have the control I do…" The questions apparent on his face didn't go away. "We take our games very seriously here in Volterra. Told you we weren't the bad guys. Nico, Dem, and I are very much brother and sisters… We are a family, beneath everything else." I stuck out my tongue at him, just to be the immature child that I am. He rolled his eyes as we approached the car and he opened the door for me before crawling into the driver's seat himself.

"Alright, partner, our first mission. Are you prepared?" I said in my very best (but still awful) undercover-agent-voice. Edward rolled his eyes and mumbled, "Yeah," under his breath. One day, Edward will be fun. If it's the last thing I do.