Chapter 37

20 minutes later, they were driving past sprawling estates. It was a whole other world as it looked like it remained unaffected by the past three years. Lawns were green and immaculate, gardens growing beautifully. Gardeners out in the sun working to keep it all in check.

"Are we ok, after last night?" Naz asked Mike, they had been driving in companionable silence since they left the house.

"I'm ok, but I am worried about you." He said honestly.

"I'm just going to need time to acclimate back to reality not just society." Naz said in serious manner, Mike nodded as he completely understood. He only had one trip on Nostos but it was enough to give him a taste.

"I know, but you can talk to me instead of just-"

"Sex?" Naz asked with a wry smile.

"Yeah, not that I'm complaining but sex isn't therapy." Mike told her.

"It's a therapy of sorts but I agree with what you're trying to say." Naz said, her stomach churned as she didn't want to have this conversation. She didn't want to overanalyse it. "It's just hard to talk about that time of life, it seems ridiculous that I was a cop for years and never once did I wake up in a panic. One tiny war and a drug habit later, I can't handle a simple thunder storm." Naz told him.

"It wasn't a tiny war. It was a pandemic followed by war to stop the genocide of innocent people. It's different type of trauma to endure. We don't get training for apocalyptic scale events." Mike argued as he didn't want her to diminish herself or what she had endured. He wanted her to accept it at face value and know her strength for being able to keep moving and breathing even when it hurt.

"No, we don't." Naz agreed.

"Nothing wrong with a headshrinker to clear out the clutter. I'm going to check in with one in the next couple of weeks. Maybe we can find one together." Mike suggested.

"We already need couple's therapy?" Naz teased, Mike grinned but shook his head.

"No, but it wouldn't hurt to see the same person separately. I'll ask around for a name." Mike said as he turned down the side road.

"I'd appreciate that." Naz told him, even though she felt apprehensive about it. "So, how far do we have to go?" she asked him.

"Not far, but we'll have to walk to the house." He said as he nodded his head towards where many cars were currently parked in a crowded manner.

"I'll put on my shoes." Naz said, Mike parked the car a couple minutes later, they stepped out of the car. He estimated they had a leisurely 10 to 15 minute walk ahead of them.

"How late are we?" Naz asked as they got out of the car and started walking.

"It starts at twelve and we go about ten minutes to go." He told her, he held out his right hand to her. She smiled at the simple gesture as she took it in her left.

"We'll have to take it slow." She said, her shoes already pinching. She really wished she hadn't gotten it into her head that she had to wear heels. But, she wanted to look a certain way and boots weren't going to cut it.

"No problem." Mike replied.

Sasha felt something tug on the leg of her high waist, dusty rose pink, tapered cigarette suit pants. She had a loose white singlet tucked into the waist band and matched the outfit with a pair of nude heels and a light grey denim moto jacket. Her hair out in loose waves, she was exhausted but she felt like her veneer was perfect. Three hours in front of mirror making sure she looked perfect, proved it was worth the effort. She looked down to the source and found Frankie at her feet dressed in cute tan chinos and a blue shirt with suspenders.

"You Pretty." Frankie told Sasha.

"Awwh, thank you." Sasha said with a smile, Frankie held up his arms at her in the most adorable and demanding manner.

"Me up, now." He demanded. Sasha snorted a laugh as she obliged the boy. She sat him on her hip and looked at him.

"How are you?" She asked him.

"He's trouble." Kara said a little breathless as she joined them. She and Sasha exchanged a brief hello before they turned their attention to Frankie.

"Frankie seems to be in good spirits." Sasha said, she tickled Frankie's belly, the little boy giggled in joy. A sound that was incredibly uplifting. She looked back to Kara and couldn't help but note the dark circles under Kara's eyes that concealer could not cover. Her hair was styled back in the military do of a tight low bun which told Sasha the woman had been operating on low sleep and put her hair back out reflex of years of service. Wake up, put ones hair away as quickly and efficiently as possible. Even so, she wore a beautiful red and black floral summer dress with a dark cream knitted cardigan and brown cowboy boots. It was an interesting look, but somehow it just worked for the woman.

"Yes, well he had a nice nap and some of his lunch. Now, he wants to play with all his aunties and uncles." Kara said with such love and exhaustion at the same time.

"You know, I wouldn't mind hanging out Frankie for an afternoon. Just so you can have some 'Mommy' time." Sasha casually offered, as she did; Frankie pulled on her hair that was loose making her wince. Also making her rethink her offer for a microsecond. It also explained the other reason Kara wore a bun.

"No hair pulling, Frankie." Kara gently chastised Frankie as she gave Sasha an apologetic smile. "Sorry." She said as she helpfully pushed Sasha's hair over to one side so Frankie would be discouraged. Luckily, just the look of on Kara's face was enough for the boy to not attempt it again.

"It's ok. How are you?" Sasha asked her, Frankie rested his head on her shoulder as he hugged her. Somehow, him being cute made his actions quickly forgiven.

"Honestly?" Kara asked in a low voice.

"Promise never to tell a soul." Sasha told her.

"Exhausted. I really wanted to stay home but-"

"Mandatory social attendance." Sasha said, Kara nodded they both wore commiserating looks as no one actually wanted to be at the party. They wanted R&R, to celebrate later when the rest of world could join in. But SECNAV wanted a party, so here they all were.

"Yes, but at least there is real food. Do you think it's poor form if I stuff my purse full of it?" Kara asked her in amusement.

"Yes, but everyone is doing it. I've already squirreled away my dinner in my bag that's in the coat room. I know for a fact that Miller is not happy to see us and that's probably meatballs in his pocket." Sasha said, Kara burst out laughing.

"He needs a girlfriend with a large purse." Kara quipped.

"He certainly does." Sasha said with a smile, Frankie just watched them with a smile on his face. He might not understand all the words but he knew what was happening around him was good and worthy of smiling.

"Oh my god, I'm so glad I found you two." Alisha said as she joined them, she had a plate piled high with food. "SECNAV has the hots for Naz, does he not see the engagement ring? I know the diamonds are small but she's been waving it in his face like a 'f- off' sign." Alisha said with glee that it made the others smile.

"Naz and Mike are here?" Sasha asked, she looked around and smiled as she saw the couple at the far side of the garden. Naz wrapped her arms around one of Mike's, leaning in as a clear message of who she was with. SECNAV just kept chatting, completely oblivious though she was sure he was just faking it as he was too observant to not see it. "I see them." Sasha remarked.

"They are engaged?" Kara asked in mocking surprise.

"Yes, I overheard that it happened the day we got back." Alisha said as she begrudgingly pulled a $20 note from the back pocket of the jeans she was wearing and passed it to Kara.

"A lot of money is changing hands today." Kara said in appreciation as she pocketed the cash.

"You bet on them?" Sasha asked as Kara had been adamant about staying out of the gossip and speculation.

"Frankie's college fund." Kara said with an unapologetic shrug.

"I don't know how you knew." Alisha said to Kara in disbelief. "I knew they were together and were going to get it on but marriage? Hell no." she added before she ate a mini tart from her plate.

"Captain's a traditionalist." Kara said as if it were enough evidence.

"I didn't think he was that strict or even religious." Alisha said with a frown, she seemed to have a light bulb moment. Sasha wondered if the woman had figured out that it was a green card arrangement. "Or, they were doing the dirty on the ship and she's pregnant. So, instead of dating and taking their time; he had put a ring on it quick." Alisha mused, Sasha relaxed as assumptions went it was standard.

"Or they could be deeply in love. They wouldn't be the first romance to happen on the Nathan James." Kara argued with a smile.

"Engaged?" Joshua asked Naz in disbelief, Naz nodded as she had just rebuffed the man's third offer for a date to some social event in the next few weeks. She'd only been talking with him for the last fifteen minutes and she was exhausted.

"Mike asked me when we got back. It was very romantic and we couldn't be happier if we tried." Naz said, Mike nodded while he tried not to show how much he was enjoying this. The rubbing it in the SECNAV's face that he couldn't get everything he wanted. SECNAV blinked and looked at the ring as he wore a mixed expression of resignation and conniving.

"Well, this is great. Two war heroes marrying and starting a new chapter together in America. It'll be great PR for the Navy. It's be amazing if you'd gotten engaged to Tom Chandler, one war hero redeeming another but this will do." Joshua told her, as if he were selling her the idea.

"Rather trite, don't you think?" Naz asked him, she felt offended not just for herself but Mike as well. Yet he took the insult like water running off a duck's back.

"People love a good romance story especially when it's of someone they idolise. You are an idol, Tom is an idol in need of redemption." Joshua told her.

"Do you not get that I'm marrying this man?" Naz asked Joshua gesturing to Mike. "But you feel free to marry to Tom Chandler. I think you two would make a great looking couple." Naz added, Joshua blinked at her, before he laughed.

"Of course, the Navy is progressive but not that progressive. What I'm suggesting is if it doesn't work out between you and Captain Slattery, then you should think about Tom. Or even me, the things we could do together would be magnificent." Joshua told her.

"I'm right here." Mike said, his amusement evaporating as he went from feeling smug to being demeaned. Joshua smiled and slapped Mike on the shoulder. A brave move given their size differences.

"I don't see my relationship with Mike as something disposable. I love him and I'm fully invested with him. So, I'd appreciate it if you would respect that." Naz told Joshua, Mike relaxed at her sentiments. She said it was such conviction that he almost believed her. Part of him actually wanted to believe it. But he brushed it off and kept his head in the game.

"Of course, my apologies. It's just that Military has one of the highest divorce rate. I mean, look at yourself." Joshua gestured at Naz. "You're beautiful, you saved lives and she's a public figure without even trying." he told her, Naz tensed at his suppositions as she knew what he was doing. He just wanted to parade her around like the UK government after the war.

"I'm not interested in being a public figure. I just want to put the past behind me, move forward with Mike." Naz said, wishing she could be anywhere else and discussing anything else but this.

"With a nice quiet life." Mike said, standing up her. Joshua didn't look too happy about it.

"Just how I want it." Naz said as they smiled at one another.

"So, I can't even entice you into a large public wedding for you two?" Joshua asked taking a different tactic.

"No." Mike and Naz said in unison.

A while later,

"Sorry," Sasha said as she accidentally reached for the salad tongs as someone else. She turned and saw Tom to her right. He looked good dressed in a white button-down shirt and jeans. "Go ahead." She told him.

"You first." He said, Sasha picked up the tongs and piled some salad leaves on her plate. She wondered how much of the feast SECNAV had the table came out of cold storage that was meant for others. She brushed it away as she just wanted to be spoilt without the guilt.

"Thanks," she said as she passed the tongs to him. She wished she felt easy around him but instead she felt awkward and apprehensive. She couldn't help the tight knot of stress in her chest as she looked at him. Part of it was that she wasn't sure how to act around him, she didn't know what to expect from him. She certainly didn't want to know what his expectations of her were.

"I can't remember the last time I've seen this much food in one place." Tom said conversationally.

"16 months ago." She told him wryly, she chagrined at her faux pas. "You missed the banquet in yours and the Nathan James crew's honour." She informed him.

"I hope everyone enjoyed it." Tom remarked.

"It was good, even if we all weren't in a celebratory mood. But hey, no sense in wasting free food and booze." Sasha said, she hated how callous and bitchy she sounded as it wasn't hard to read between the lines.

"You know, one day, you'll cut me some slack." Tom joked as they finished piling their plates with food and moved away from the table. He followed her as she sat down at one of the empty tables that circled the backyard.

Majority of the crew were standing around drinking and talking. Some were playing with Frankie and the other kids to keep them entertained as their parents got a break to eat and socialise. They really were one big family. For better or worse they were all in it together.

"You'd be surprised how much slack I've cut you since the day I met you." Sasha said before she took a bite of her lunch. She wished that Naz or Azima were here to rescue her from the hole she was digging herself into. But Azima was flirting with Wolf who was holding Frankie in his arms. Naz was talking casually with Kara, while Mike was talking with Meylan and some bigwigs. "I didn't see Mira, did you?" Sasha asked changing the topic.

"She had to work a shift at the hospital. I asked Meylan about it." Tom said.

"I like Mira, I think she'd be sad to miss meeting Naz." Sasha said sticking to safe territory.

"Mmm, I'm sure. So, Ashley tells me that Mike and Naz are having a quickie wedding." He said between bites of his lunch.

"They want a small and simple ceremony." Sasha said.

"Seems a shame, just because it's there second marriage doesn't mean they shouldn't celebrate it as big as their first." Tom said.

"Naz's first wedding had over 400 people on her side alone." Sasha said wryly, she over sold the number for shock value. It worked as Tom's eyebrows raised in surprise.

"How could she know that many people?" Tom asked flabbergasted.

"Persian Weddings are big events and her one wish was for a small ceremony where she could enjoy the day with Mike. Quick ceremony followed by a nice dinner. Mike agreed, it's how they want to do it." Sasha said in a matter of fact manner.

"Wouldn't it be more fun to throw them a surprise wedding?" he asked her in a low and conspiratorial tone. The idea should've been thrilling as she saw what he was doing. But all she felt was stress as she didn't have the time to organising a wedding with her work schedule.

"No, they both hate surprises and don't want a surprise wedding with a boatload of guests." Sasha told him.

"I doubt that." Tom argued. "I think we as in everyone here minus the Admirals and SECNAV could use a wedding. A happy celebration of love, how many people on the Nathan James have gotten a happy ending out of everything that happened?" Tom asked her.

"I can only think of Kara and maybe Azima, if Wolf plays his cards right." Sasha remarked. She wasn't won by his argument as she knew what Mike and Naz wanted. They didn't want a big event. "But it's beside the point, Naz and Mike want what they want. I know you think you should be making grandiose gestures to make up for lost time, but you don't have to. It's selfish to make everyone here, including me; pool our time and resources for a huge wedding the couple don't want just because you have to make some grand gesture as a friend to Mike." Sasha told him.

"Wow, tell me how you really feel." Tom said dryly as he felt like Sasha had squashed his ego like a bug. She gave an aggravated sigh.

"It's about Naz and Mike. It's not about you and planning a surprise wedding won't salvage your reputation. It repair those cracks you feel in your relationships." She said, going after his ego so he'd drop the idea entirely.

"You think I'm using them." Tom said, reading between the lines very well and getting pissed at her accusation. Just when he thought they were getting to a better place she threw him into a tailspin.

"I think that you genuinely want to do something nice. If so, then do it but you're thinking way too big. Sure, be generous but let them have what they want and if you're looking for excuses to spend time with people then ask them out for a coffee or a beer. Not throw a wedding where you get to take a bow as people applaud your efforts." Sasha said, she felt like she was telling him off but she really wanted to make herself clear as she was frustrated by him. Frustrated at him forcing his way into being the centre of attention.

Maybe it wasn't his intention, but she knew if he did the big wedding for Mike and Naz, the two would thank him and a spotlight would shine on him and people would applause. Suddenly it wasn't about Mike and Naz, it was look at Tom and his magnificent organisational skills.

"Mike deserves something special." Tom said ignoring the sting of her words.

"What Mike and Naz have is special and it's theirs. Their celebration will be special no matter what. But how would you feel if Mike stomped over your wedding day plans and turned it into something you didn't want.?" Sasha asked him.

"I'm not going to do it, ok?" Tom asked her.

"Good," Sasha said with relief. "Anyway, don't you have enough on your plate with PTA and the dress code issues?" she asked acerbically.

"What's wrong with my wanting to be involved with my daughter's education and in trying to make her school life easier. She has another 5 years of school." Tom said, feeling incredibly defensive.

"Nothing, but maybe you should at least ask Ashley if she wants you fighting this." Sasha told him.

"She talk to you about it?" Tom asked, he wondered where he got the reputation of being a meddler as that was what Sasha was throwing at him.

"No, I just remember when I was a teenager. I did not like when my Mum threw her weight and money around to get things done." Sasha said with a shrug.

"I forgot that you were a trouble child." Tom said with a smile.

"I'm not interested in rehashing my childhood." Sasha told him as the thought of rehashing the past made her feel nauseous.

"I think-" Tom started.

"Call General Quarters, Tom is thinking." Andrea joked as she sat down at their table, Darius came and sat down next to her with a grin. Sasha was grateful for them joining the table as she needed someone to distract her from the tension and stress pent up in her.

"What is Tom thinking?" Darius asked, Sasha smiled as she liked Darius. He didn't understand half the Navy lingo or how the military worked but he could charm the knickers off a Nun.

"I was thinking of a surprise wedding for Mike and Naz." Tom said, he wanted to see what the others thought. Darius and Andrea made stink face at the idea.

"No." Darius told him firmly.

"Terrible idea." Andrea said in agreement.

"It would be a celebration." Tom argued, as he couldn't believe his friends were knocking back his idea like he'd suggested he give the couple a dog turd covered in glitter as a wedding present.

"For who?" Andrea asked him, her tone thick with skepticism.

"Hmm, Andrea and I had this conversation as I am one for large celebrations of life whether it be a birthday, wedding and or anniversary. But Andrea also reminded me that the crew just go their first R&R in over two years." Darius said.

"They want to go and spend it with their family and friends. Decompress and relax away from each other. I know I could use a holiday away from my work." Andrea said with a sigh.

"Remind me why we suffer through this?" Mike asked the table as he and Naz appeared at their table; plates of food in their hands. The two sat down on Sasha's side. Both looking exhausted and grateful to be off their feet.

"Naz, I love your outfit." Andrea told her from across the table.

"Thanks, I do wish I went for flats as I've been sinking in the grass all day." Naz said with a wry smile.

"I am wearing boots." Andrea said smugly.

"I wish I had been that smart. Can someone tell me what's going on with these waffles?" Naz asked as she had a piece of it stuck to her fork.

"Chicken waffles, just think shredded chicken cooked in waffle mixture. It's an abomination." Darius told Naz.

"It's delicious." Andrea assured her before she took a bite of her own meal.

"Our baby will have my refined palate." Darius told Andrea, she gave him an incredulous look.

"You drank mouldy water from the bottom of your beer fridge at work last week." Andrea reminded him, proving her point that he didn't have a refined palate at all.

"I was proving a point to my staff." Darius argued.

"Which was?" Naz asked, the question that everyone at the table wanted to hear the answer to.

"I have an iron gut and you drink and that the fridge needs to be cleaned and repaired." Darius remarked.

"He doesn't have an Iron gut." Andrea pointed out, she shot him a look as he wore a pout at her for ruining his story. "You were sick all night." She told Darius, others at the table chuckled in amusement.

"But they didn't know that." Darius argued.

"Hopefully, your kid will have Andrea's brains and common sense." Mike quipped to Darius.

"So, we were talking weddings. Andrea and I have been engaged in several negotiations about ours. We'd like some other point of views. Tom thinks bigger the better, Sasha thinks that I should let Andrea have her way entirely. thoughts?" Darius asked Mike.

"You should find a compromise where both parties come out happy with some concessions. But I think smaller is better." Mike said, Naz nodded in agreement while she continued to eat.

"But what about the crew?" Tom asked him.

"What about them?" Mike asked between bites of his lunch.

"They are family, I think they'd love to see you two get married as much as they would Andrea and Darius." Tom argued.

"Sure, but the crew deserves time off to have a holiday to wherever they want without feeling beholden to my life. I want them to go and be wherever they want to be. My marriage to Naz, is ours not theirs." he gestured to Naz and himself "We've discussed it and we want a small ceremony with our closest friends and their partners followed by dinner." Mike said with a closed lip smile. "Civilian attire, relaxed and low key afternoon and dinner." He added, he loved the idea of just having a relaxed ceremony without having to worry about drunk wedding guests, seating charts or any of the major dramas that came out of a large wedding.

He looked at Naz, she gave him a closed lip smile before she continued to eat. He just wanted it to be just them, a couple witnesses and a justice of the peace. Then a nice, relaxed dinner afterwards as he didn't need to start this chapter off with a bang. He just wanted her and a life with her as her husband. That notion was startling but yet at the same time he was content and satisfied. Something he hadn't felt in a long time.

Sure, he had stress and concerns just like everyone else. He was normal and had problems but in general he felt calm about how his life was shaping. He could see it all panning out for the next few years, it looked like it was going to be ok.

"I can't believe you abandoned me for fried chicken waffles." Meylan griped at the table as he joined them.

"Among other things, you looked like you were having fun." Mike drawled mockingly as Meylan made a sour face.

"Do you know how repugnant those men are? They comment on how I'm not dark enough to really be considered 'entirely black'. What does that even mean? Should I feel as offended as I do?" Meylan asked.

"You are fairly pale." Naz said, Meylan flipped her the bird and the two knew it was in good humour.

"I'm darker than you." Meylan told her.

"Well, according to Base Commander's wife, I'm too swarthy for Mike." Naz half joked, Meylan made a face while the others felt uncomfortable.

"Yeah, I give her a wide berth since the last function we were at, she asked me I wanted to put my dark chocolate in her milk." Meylan said, everyone at the table winced and cringed at everything that was wrong with that sentence.

"Oh, why do we have to share our base with that woman. She is ferociously uncouth." Andrea said making a face of disgust.

"I'm so glad that she is not here today. Now, speaking of people not here. My better half wants a photo of you two." Meylan said looking at Mike and Naz. "She doesn't believe that Mike has broken his vow of celibacy." He joked, Mike glowered at him.

"I took no such vow." Mike told him.

"Yet, you turned down all her beautiful nurse and doctor friends. For her." Meylan said as he pulled out his iPhone.

"Why do you say it like I'm roadkill in comparison to your wife's hot friends?" Naz asked him.

"Well, you scrub up ok." Meylan told her, she flipped him the bird which the others laughed."Now, get the ring in the picture and smile." Meylan told them, Naz and Mike posed for the photo, smiles on their face. "A little less teeth Mike, you're looking a little crazy." Meylan mocked, after a few other 'pro' tips the photo was taken. "Perfect." He told them.

"Send me a copy of picture, Man Ray." Mike said in a dry manner. His mobile phone pinged as Meylan sent him the picture. "Thanks." Mike said.

"Mira sends her love and congratulations by the way. She's going to crash your hen's night." Meylan told them before he pocketed his iPhone and sat back in his chair.

"I look forward to meeting her." Naz said as she didn't mind who showed up for the hen's party. "Though, I can't remember when we're having it." she added.

"Next Friday," Sasha said, deciding on the spot.

"I'll text her the details given we'll be having it at Darius' restaurant." Andrea told Meylan.

"Mi casa es su casa, I know how to throw a party. Good food, best moonshine in Norfolk and we're only a block away from the nightclubs and Salsa clubs." Darius said, promoting his business.

"I like the sound of that." Naz said with a smile.

Several hours later,

Naz flopped onto the couch beside Mike; exhausted to the bone. But feeling pretty good as she had gorged herself on the food at the party. So much so, there was no need for dinner.

"That was a long day." Naz said as she curled her feet under her and leaned into Mike. He wrapped a lazy arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer into his side as they both relaxed.

"It was, but a good one." He told her.

"I really liked your speech." Naz told him as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"You should hear Tom speak, he gives the best speeches." Mike said.

"I don't know. I liked the part where you said…" She drew the words from her memory. "This may be the last time we're all together, but no matter what the future holds, no matter how far we travel. A small part of us and our stories will forever remain on the Nathan James just as we'll carry a piece of her in our memories for rest of our days. To the very best crew a Captain could have." Naz said, mimicking his inflections but thankfully not his accent. She gave a relaxed sigh. "I really liked that." She told him.

"It wasn't too bad." Mike accepted, he hadn't wanted to give a speech but SECNAV called him up. Mike knew it was unrealistic for all the crew to return after their R&R. That many would move onto new positions or be forced into transfers to other posts given how thin the Navy was stretched. So, it was good to say a few final words.

"I have to ask, are you are ok with a small wedding ceremony?" she asked him, Tom's odd conversation has made her wonder if he was up to something.

"Yes. I've spent the last two years sacrificing my life and time to larger causes. This wedding, this marriage is for me and you. Not them, not the Navy or the human race. I want it to be ours." He told her as he rubbed her back in a soothing manner, it more for his sake than her own. But he did enjoy just relaxing on the couch with her.

"Then it will be ours. I know how stressful big weddings are and how you can feel lost the crowd; thanking everyone. I don't regret my wedding to Elias, but I do love the idea of our small wedding." Naz said with a smile.

Sasha returned to her quarters and kicked off her shoes before she walked to her fridge. She stored away the food she'd take from the party and pulled out a ginger beer. She popped the cap off and took a long pull and gave a sigh as she was happy to be home. BOQ weren't really warm or cozy but it was her space. She walked over the bed and climbed in, not bothering to get changed as she just needed a moment to decompress. To breathe, it seemed to work as the first sip eased the knot of tension inside her.

She clicked on the TV and tuned into an old episode of Stargate Atlantis. She wasn't a big sci-fi fan but she just needed something to zone out to and all the other channels were adverts.

Twenty minutes into the episode, she wished she lived in a whole other galaxy. She had to admit the apartments didn't look half bad and the ocean views were as stunning as the architecture. She wasn't so sure how she felt about the aliens with life sucking vagina hands… but it had to be preferable to living on Earth at the moment.

She felt her thoughts go dark, as she thought about Tom. How close she was to verbally tearing him to shreds. She wished she could get over herself and her problems with him. He still left her angry and twisted with bitterness.

She knew what she needed, a new mission on another continent. Far, far away from America and Tom. What she truly wanted was a clean slate, a fresh start where she could be happy, where the weight of the world wasn't weighing heavily on her shoulders.

The only time she felt that she could be happy was when she was away from work, Tom and not thinking about either of them. When she hung out with Naz and the crew, she felt a part of their world. Somewhere, where she belonged. She had times where she was genuinely happy.

Then Tom came back, all she could think was how he kept shifting the focus back to his problems, his dramas. She understood why he left, she understood the breadth of his pain better than before. But she wondered how she could be friends with a man who wanted to swim in his grief, to use it to fuel his anger and find dramas and fights to keep himself in a perpetual state of stress. She didn't want to be sucked into his world if he was incapable of being happy and living a more peaceful existence.

"I'm full." Ashley told Tom before he could even ask they wanted him to make a shake of soylent for dinner. Sammy was already halfway up the stairs to his bedroom.

"Thank you for coming today and behaving well." Tom said sincerely to them.

"We know how it goes." Ashley told him, he frowned as she made it sound like it was a chore. Maybe it was for her, which made him think that maybe next time he'd ask or organise a babysitter; so, the kids didn't have to go.

"Thanks anyway. I do appreciate it." Tom told her.

"Yep, I'm going to go bed early." Ashley said.

"Ash, come sit with me for just a minute." Tom said as he gestured to the couch. Ashley sat on the opposite end to him and looked apprehensive.

"Did I do something wrong?" Ashley asked him, Tom shook his head.

"No, I was wondering how you felt about me going to PTA, trying to change the dress code." He said, hoping she would give him an honest answer.

"It's your business." She said pragmatically, while at the same time not answering his question at all.

"I'm doing it for you." Tom told her.

"Not really, I mean I get that you think you're helping future girls or whatever. But Naz made it pretty clear that it's impossible to please everyone. That I'll be met with prejudice due to my gender no matter what I wear or what I do. I can't win, I dress conservatively and I'm a dork. I dress slutty and I'm trying too hard and must like boys staring at my ankles. Can't win." Ashley said with a shrug.

"It's not really the point of it. I don't want you to think that you can't win." Tom said a little confused and not sure whether he should approve of everything Naz said or not.

"Naz said that it's like way better to dress conservatively and smart for school and work. She said that it might be a pain but it's just a fact of life if I want a job in a serious workplace. I need to dress like the person I want to become. I don't want to be the girl who just skates by on her looks. Sasha half agreed, she said I could wear whatever I wanted to in my own time. That whatever people think of my outfit is a reflection on them, not me." Ashley said.

"I'm not sure what to think of that." Tom said as he felt like Sasha and Naz were teaching Ashley on how to live in an oppressive society. But then, he never truly took the time to appreciate the latitude his gender gave him. While he was progressive enough to believe women were his equal. He still had moments where he had strong views against women gaining equality. They were based on the social constructs that were built into him over the years.

"They said a lot of stuff. I like them as they really make me think about the image I want to present to the world." Ashley told him.

"Your image?" he asked.

"Yeah, Naz and Sasha agree that perception is everything. If I feel comfortable in my clothing and skin, then I will look and feel confident. They just want be myself and be comfortable. I like that." Ashley said.

"That's fair. But do you want me to drop the fight for the dress code?" he asked.

"It's up to you, I know how you need something to fight. You always win, for most part." Ashley said with a shrug.

"I don't need to fight." Tom told her, she snorted a laugh.

"Yeah you do, Dad. It's why you're in the Navy, why you saved the world and couldn't give up even when the Red Rust happened. I just don't get why you don't fight for your own social life." Ashley told him.

"I have a social life." Tom lied, he just didn't like his teenage daughter pointing out his lack of a life.

"No, you don't. You know, you could start dating again. Like genuinely date someone you like, not because they are the closest woman around who's under 50 yrs old." Ashley informed him, it stung for him to have Ashley judge him so harshly. But she wasn't wrong. Cali was nice but she had been the only woman under 50 who wasn't a Nostos addict.

"What do you know about dating?" Tom asked incredulously, he hoped the answer was nothing as he couldn't handle the idea of her dating. She was too young.

"More than you." Ashley informed him.

"Should we be talking about it?" Tom asked her.

"No, Mom told me I couldn't date boys until I was 16. I assume it's the same for if I dated a girl?" Ashley asked him, Tom blinked as he was not ready for this conversation.

"Do you want to date girls?" he asked, unsure of if he wanted to know his little girl was becoming a sexual being let alone what her preference was. Ashley gave a noncommittal shrug.

"I don't know." She replied.

"Did Sasha or Naz give you advice on this?" he asked out of curiosity.

"Naz said to keep an open mind about life and food. That I should always keep mad money in my purse for when I get angry at the moron that I have to get home on my own. Sasha told me that you don't want me dating until after you're dead." Ashley said with a smile, Tom glowered as he knew his daughter was being a smart ass.

"Not true, I think 16 is old enough for dating with conditions applied. But we'll discuss that when we get there." Tom said, comfortable that he had a good year and half before he had to worry about it.