A/N: This chapter was so freaking HARD to write and I hope you all understand by the time you are done reading. My god. Anyway, this was supposed to be a Valentine's Day gift to you all, but it's a little late now. So, happy belated Valentine's Day! Or Single Awareness Day! Whichever you celebrate! (I don't celebrate either, but whatever.) I hope you all enjoy and let me know what you think!

Disclaimer: I own nothing but Charlie and this plot

Heart

The doors shut before I could get a good look at whoever it was that turned the corner. Oh for the love of Christ please tell me that wasn't him. I don't think I'll be able to handle it if he actually heard a single syllable that Peter and I said to each other. Oh god, please… "JARVIS?" I call as the elevator starts moving upwards. "Can you tell me exactly where Loki has been for the past twenty minutes?"

The AI is silent for a minute and I get increasingly more nervous. "I am afraid my scans cannot pick up his exact location," he finally says, voice unsure.

I close my eyes in mortification. Shit shit shit. "What do you mean, JARVIS?"

"My scans can confirm that he was in fact in the banquet hall, however they are also picking up unusual readings. It is as if he was not completely solid." He pauses for a moment. "I am running a diagnostic on my facial recognition software in case there is flaw within the algorithm."

"Oh, don't bother, JARVIS." I sigh and bang my head against the back wall of the elevator. "You're dealing with a magician. I highly doubt there is anything wrong with your software." In fact, I'm pretty sure I know exactly what he did. Which means I am royally screwed.

The elevator comes to a stop and the doors open. I step out. "JARVIS? Can you put my floor on lockdown? I don't want anyone up here for the rest of the night."

"Of course, Charlie. Would you like to attach a message?"

"Yeah. Just say that I have a headache and I just need some sleep."

"Consider it done. Good night, Charlie."

"Good night, JARVIS."

I walk into my dark room, stripping the wings off my back as I go. Going on lockdown means that no one can come onto my floor for a desired amount of time: for this instance, the rest of the night. JARVIS's surveillance gets turned off so no one can spy into my room to check on me, but it also means I am cut off from JARVIS as well. Not that I mind. That's kind of the point, actually. The only instance where this isn't the case is if there is an emergency—say I fell in the shower and hit my head, someone else in the Tower would be notified of what happened and lockdown will immediately be cancelled. It's a program my dad came up with in order for us all to have personal time with no questions asked. It's pretty easy for us all to forget about boundaries when we all live in one Tower and can just zip to any desired floor. I'm just grateful I was added to the list of those who can call on lockdown.

It came in handy quite a bit after my kidnapping.

I walk over to a screen that is beside my bed and touch it to activate it. This is a more high-tech version of my music library. I scroll through the options and finally decide on "Through Glass" by Stone Sour. I need some rock in my life. I also need something to distract myself of the implications of the last five minutes.

Well, last half hour to be more precise.

As the song starts, I walk into my room and turn on the glaring light. I gently peel off the mask and wash the makeup off my face, which actually took a lot longer than I wanted it to. Apparently giving myself raccoon eyes was a bad idea. Once the water starts running clear again, I finally finish, turning off the light and walking out into the pitch-black room again. I don't turn on any lights as I walk over to my bed and collapse on it, legs dangling off the side. I think better when I'm in the dark anyway. I don't know why—and it's probably morbid as hell—but I've always been comfortable in the dark.

It's also a pretty convenient place to hide.

I rake my hands through my hair and sigh out in annoyance. This is honestly the last thing I need right now. I'm already going through so much and dealing with so many different emotions. Yeah, sure, why not add love to the list? Er, like… er, infatuation. Whatever the hell this is! I growl in frustration at my own thoughts. I mean, I suppose it's not that surprising that I would have feelings for Loki—I'm around him enough and I'm certainly comfortable. More comfortable than I should be. No one else outside of my family has seen the full extent of my scars like he has. Adam couldn't even stand seeing the little that he did see. It made him feel particularly uncomfortable for whatever reason. Okay, they make everyone uncomfortable, so I can't blame him for that.

He's saved my life and my sanity more times than I can count over the past month and a half. Let's face it, that's probably all this is—some twisted sense of paying him back for all he's done for me. I shake my head. That doesn't really make much sense though. I'm not the type to be overly sensitive about that. And that would just make me some clingy bitch rather than the independent woman that I actually am. I actually feel a deep sense of annoyance over how many times he has had to help me. I really am not this much of a damsel in distress. Everything just seems to be happening at once and I really don't have the experience in fighting like he does. It's no wonder I keep getting overpowered by my opponents and he has to come sweeping in to help me. Yet again. And that's not even mentioning how many times I've had to face my world getting completely ripped out from under me. To be perfectly honest, I am so glad that I have only had one mental breakdown. I've had a couple existential crises, yes, but not any crying fits besides the one.

And I can't count when I had my nightmare as a mental breakdown. That's just my PTSD rearing its ugly head once again.

I really hope this isn't some weird Stockholm syndrome type deal. No, that can't be it either. I have been around other people and it's not like I'm his prisoner. I roll my eyes. Well, according to my dad I am. But he is just being unreasonable. Then again, I thought he was being unreasonable when he thought there was something going on between Loki and I. There isn't anything going on right now, but if Peter picked up on all of the subtleties, who's to say that Dad's concerns aren't legitimate?

I groan and roll over onto my stomach. I wish I could say it was just infatuation. I mean, he is attractive. Very much so. But I don't fall for guys that easily. If that were the case, I would have been in George's arms years ago. I cringe at that thought. Ew. No, it's something more than just his good looks that makes me actually like him. More than his looks or his ability to keep me alive or his ability to keep me sane. There are plenty of people in my life that can do all of that (or just one of those things) and my heart doesn't unnaturally pound in my chest when I think about them. I glare at the distant wall. My heart needs to stop doing that, now that I think about it.

So what is it? To be perfectly honest, he's an ass. He's snarky and sarcastic and a complete annoying pain in my ass the majority of the time. But…

But he's protective. He's kind underneath that shell of cynical sarcasm. He's courteous and honorable in a fight and when he's teaching me or the boys. He understands everything I am going though and walks me through my crises with patience. He is wicked smart and he actually has a sense of humor. And it is a nice bonus that he is very attractive.

Okay, so maybe it's not that surprising that I like him.

The music changes to The 1975, a band I haven't listened to in forever. I smile slightly at the change. It falls after a second though. Okay, I can admit that I'm getting feelings for Loki. It doesn't change one small fact: there is no way in hell that he feels the same about me. It's just… why would he? I can fully admit that I am an annoying, complicated, broken woman. I can't think of a single reason for why he would want to be with me in any romantic sense. Not to mention that he probably thinks I am no more a child because of the simple fact that I am twenty-four and he's over a thousand years old. My brain still twitches at that thought.

Let's go through the list: I am freaking young compared to him. I have more mental problems than one woman should be allowed to have. I have a pretty scary family and a couple of its members actually wants to kill him. I have childish outbursts that rival that of a five-year-old. I'm apparently completely useless in a fight. And there's that whole flaw of me being half-goblin and the majority of the Asgardian kingdom treats me as if I am a walking nightmare. I don't have a solid handle on my fire and I haven't even attempted to handle my magic. And I'm not even that pretty.

And now I am thinking of Kelly again. Damnit.

To be honest, he deserves someone like her. Someone who isn't so guarded, pessimistic, and, well, broken. I smile thinking about Kelly. She is actually a wonderful girl, once you get to know her. She's so carefree and boisterous. She loves life with both arms wide open. When she's in front of her kids, it is scary her transformation: patient, kind, able to adapt to just about any situation, and so fun. She's the teacher I wish I had in high school. I may not approve how she handles her sex life, but that's her problem and not something I should judge. And I never have until now.

I'm irritated again.

Not to mention she is completely gorgeous: long black hair, piercing blue eyes with almost snow white skin. You can thank the odd mix to her parents: her mom is an Ojibwe Indian and her dad has strong Scandinavian features. Not to mention she is tall, skinny, and has a nice set of assets. And a metabolism that I would kill for.

I sigh and roll back over to stare at the ceiling, my legs dangling on either side of the corner of my bed. I really should just forget about this whole thing. I'm sure that wasn't Loki when the elevator doors shut. I mean, plenty of people wore black and red tonight and he probably is still in the hall with all of the other guests. My heart is still a shattered mess and I just can't give him that. I can't hand him something that is so tarnished and expect him to handle it and be okay to settle with that. I'm pretty good at shoving my emotions aside and forgetting about them. That's what I've done for the past five or six months with Adam, I can do it with Loki.

I close my eyes and try to get my heart to come back up from my stomach. Granted, being around him is going to be really hard now that I realize just how much I actually like him. Damnit, Peter. Damnit, Kelly. I could have just gotten through this night remaining blissfully unaware and nothing would have changed. And it's not like I can avoid him, either! He's supposed to be around me all the time.

I groan and rub my face in aggravation. "What am I supposed to do?" I mumble to the room at large. If I could get a sign from something, that would be awesome.

The song changes again, this time to OneRepublic. I sigh and sit up. I might as well get some things done before going to bed. I walk over to my desk and turn on my tablet. I open up my email and whistle at the number I have. There is no way I am sitting down and answering all of those tonight. I don't think I'll be able to answer them all tomorrow either. I shrug. Oh well. Something for another time. I quickly write out an email apologizing to the girls and giving them a more thought out excuse for why I disappeared and thanking them for showing up. I am glad I got to see them all before returning to Asgard and I have to remember to thank Dad in the morning. I send another email to Kyle, thanking him for once again keeping me sane and to have him say hi to Amanda for me. I fully expect to get those ultrasound pictures from him. I get up from the desk and pull out a backpack from my closet and start packing a few things to take back to Asgard: mainly a few more books, my sketchpad and pencil set, and the journal. I don't want to forget that.

Once that is done, I zip the bag shut and walk into my closet. I am able to get myself into a pair of comfortable pants at the very least. Getting out of this corset, on the other hand, is going to prove to be a bitch. While it has silver clasps in the front, there are simply for show, not actually of any use to me. And wiggling out of a corset without help is not an easy thing to do. I walk out of my closet and head towards the bathroom. I at least need some light to help me.

The song changes and I stop halfway across my room. It's "Whistle" by Flo Rida. I'm really not that much a fan of this song, but it's in my library because my friends like it. I walk over to the screen and start skipping through the songs. I'm not usually a music ADD person, but I just don't want to listen to pop songs right now. Or lovey sappy songs. And that seems to be what my music wants to play. I finally just roll my eyes before shutting the entire thing off. I'm not in the mood to find something appropriate to match my mood.

I finally walk into my bathroom, squinting from the glare of the light, and turn around so I can try and see the ribbon in the back. Untying it was a small struggle—Aunt 'Tasha made sure to double knot it so it stayed in place—but once is was free, a small portion of the struggle was over. I now have to try and loosen it all so I can slip it off. I don't like unlacing the ribbon because getting it laced back up is a pain. After a few minutes of wiggling and stretching and groans of pure annoyance, I finally just fling my hands in the air. "You know what? Screw it!" I say, turning out of the room and shutting the light off. I'll just sleep in the damn thing and get Aunt 'Tasha to help me out of it in the morning. I walk across the dark room blind and flop face down on the bed again. "Is the night over yet?" I ask my comforter.

"Would you like help with that?"

I shriek and sit up in bed, taking hold of one of my pillows. "Goddamnit, Loki!" I yell, flinging the pillow in the general direction of where his voice came from.

"You missed."

"I can't fucking see!" I bury my face in my hands and growl in frustration while also attempting to bring my heart rate back down to normal. Not that that is going to happen now that he's here.

"Charlie, are you alright?" comes the smooth voice of JARVIS.

I sigh. "Yeah, I'm fine, JARVIS," I answer, lowering my hands and looking up to the ceiling. "This isn't an emergency."

"Okay. Have a good night."

I don't bother responding. I simply glare in the general direction of my desk where I know he's just sitting there smirking or something at me. Damn him. There's no way I am going to be able to have a good night now. Not that I was having a good night before… Ugh! "How did you get up here?" I finally ask, making sure to let my annoyance coat my voice.

"The way I get anywhere," is his cryptic reply.

I roll my eyes before flopping back down on the bed. Can't he just go away? It's bad enough I am only just coming to realize my true feelings for the ass, but now he has to be right freaking here. I haven't been given a chance to shut my emotions away yet and I really need to do that before I get hurt yet again.

"You did not answer my question," he says. I can hear his amusement and I can't help but feel an irrational surge of anger at him.

Emotions are stupid.

"Yeah, why the hell not?" I answer into my comforter. I don't move off the bed though. I really don't want to face him, mainly because I am afraid it will be obvious to him. My heart is still beating with an uncomfortable amount of pressure against my chest and I am not okay with this.

I hear him walk over to the bed and feel the edge of it dip down. I keep my back to him. I can feel the ribbon slowly but surely loosen bit by bit. It becomes infinitely easier to breathe the more he works the bonds loose. "This garment is very odd," he finally mutters.

"How so?"

"It is obviously uncomfortable and limiting. If someone were to put too much pressure into tying it together, you could easily harm the one wearing it. It does not seem very practical."

I shrug, but smile into my arm. Leave it to him to figure out something isn't practical. "It's not supposed to be practical. It's really just to highlight a woman's waist."

"Why?"

"Today? Simply to make women look good. Back in the day when it was invented? Mainly as a tool so women couldn't run away." I know, that was cynical. But probably true. I really don't know the actual answer to that. Why did they invent these damn things in the first place?

We lapse back into a somewhat comfortable silence. After a particular rough tug, my ribs fall back into a comfortable position and I gasp in a breath of air. Yes! I can breathe again! I sit up and peel the corset over my head. After it's off me and in my hands, I stand up and walk to my closet to put it away. "Charlie," Loki calls. I ignore him in favor of putting the corset in my dresser. I finally walk back out, move to my desk, and check the contents in my bag again. I have to make sure I have everything I need, after all.

I hear cloth rustle before I feel him touch my back. His hand is warm through the lace of my top. Maybe I should have changed? "Charlie, what is wrong?" he asks.

I shrug. "What makes you think anything is wrong?"

"You refuse to look at me."

Damn. I really hate that he is so perceptive. I roll my eyes and turn around to stare up at him in defiance. "I'm looking at you now." Not that I can really see his face in the dark, but I'm just trying to be defiant and not let on about how I actually feel. I notice that his costume is gone, replaced with his usual black outfit that he wears when he isn't wearing his characteristic armor.

Granted, he may already know and this entire exercise is futile. I'm really not going to dwell on that though.

I can see him shake his head. He moves forward and I take a step back until my back is pressed into the desk. His arms come to rest on the desk on either side of me. I lean a little way from him. His eyes shine slightly in the dark and they are very close to my face. "Let's try this again," he mutters. His face is close enough to mine that I can feel his breath against my cheek. "What is on your mind?"

"Are you trying to intimidate me, Loki? Because you know that isn't going to work."

"Just answer the question, Charlie."

I roll my eyes and sigh. "There is nothing on my mind."

He can see him smirk. "It is unwise to lie to the god of lies."

I glare in response. "Drop it, Loki."

"No."

I growl in annoyance, diverting my eyes to the ground. Damn him. I'm not going to answer him, so I guess we are at an impasse. I do not appreciate the close proximity though. It's making my heart do funny things. I finally push one of his arms aside and slip underneath it to walk away from him. I really don't have to deal with this overbearing bullshit when I am in my own room.

I don't get far. He grabs my forearm and spins me back around. Before I can open my mouth to yell at him, he grabs the back of my neck and crashes his lips onto mine.

My entire being freezes. What… what is he doing? His kiss is surprisingly soft and chaste. My eyes flutter shut and I just allow it to happen. My brain is yelling that I should push him away, but I can't. His arm moves to my back to bring me closer and I wrap an arm around his neck. The kiss continues for an extra couple moments before he moves away. He rests his forehead against mine and I finally open my eyes to stare into his bright green eyes.

"Stubborn, foolish woman," he chides, a grin tugging at his mouth.

I roll my eyes. "First you're kissing me, then you're insulting me. Is this what our relationship is going to be like, Loki?"

He smiles. "Has it ever been any different?"

Okay, touché. I shake my head. "Why?" I finally ask.

"Why what?"

I laugh humorlessly. "Why me?"

He narrows his eyes. His hand moves to cup my cheek. "Do not think so little of yourself, Charlie," he answers.

I close my eyes and shake my head. I grip his wrist and move his hand away so I can take a step back. All of the molecules in my being don't want me to move away, but I need to. I need to be able to think clearly. I swallow the sudden lump in my throat and look back up at him. "You could have anyone, Loki. Truly, you could. Why would you settle with me?"

He cocks his head to the side in confusion. "Why do you believe you would be nothing more than a settlement?"

I tear my gaze away from him to glance around my room. "Because I am? There are so many other better girls out there. Girls that aren't broken, that don't have a giant crack running down the center of their heart. Girls that can actually take care of themselves." I rake my hands through my hair in frustration. "Girls that are more tolerable, more kind, more fitting. Girls that are prettier than I am." My eyes reconnect with his. "Why me?" I ask again.

"I do not know," he mumbles.

I lower my head. See? I knew this was foolish.

Before I can fall too far into a spiral of despair, he steps forward and lifts my chin again. "Let me finish. I do not know why you. Other than the fact that I can no longer get my thoughts away from you. I cannot bare it when you are hurt or in pain. And I certainly could not handle it when you died. I anticipate the moments I am in your presence and I do not understand why that is. Yes, there are better girls. However, you are not a girl—you are woman who has been through so much, many of which most girls would not be able to handle. It was your strength that captured my attention and your attitude that kept it." His thumb rubs against my cheek. "If anything, I should be asking you that question. How is it that someone so strong can love a broken monster such as myself?"

I give out another humorless laugh. "I thought we've been over this, Loki. You aren't a monster."

"Only in your eyes."

I grin. "You'd be surprised." I sigh. "I'm still trying to figure out my own emotions let alone the why to them. All I know is that I like you, a lot. I don't like it when you disappear and I certainly didn't like it when I thought someone else could capture your attention." I shake my head. "I trust you with all that I am, and that means something. I just can't give you my heart yet. It's still far too broken and that is something you do not deserve."

"Then let me ask you a simple question. Will you allow me the chance to earn it?"

I can only blink at him. I'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around this entire exchange. I just… I can't believe he would honestly want me, in any sense of the phrase.

He shakes his head at me. "Charlie, I am inexperienced in this… area of life. I will not lie to you about that. I can at least promise you that I will try. I do not believe I can heal your heart or fix your soul, but I do believe that I can help."

Tears unwillingly well up in my eyes. "Really? Because I can use all the help I can get."

He smiles at me. "It would be my genuine pleasure."

A few tears slip out and he wipes them away. I nod. "Okay," I finally whisper, answering his question.

He tilts my head up again and places another chaste kiss against my lips. Honestly, I think that is going to kill me more than anything else. I never pegged Loki to be the sweet type, but I'm liking it so far.

He takes a step back and glances around my room. "So these are your chambers," he mutters.

I raise my eyebrow at him before also looking around the dark room. "What you can see of it, anyway." I glance back up at him suspiciously. "Don't tell me you can see in the dark."

He glances back down at me and I see that smirk. His eyes flash just slightly. I give him a disbelieving look. Seriously? There has to be something this man can't do. Before I can say anything, he leans down and kisses me again. I grin again. As a way to get me to shut up, it's a pretty effective method.

"You should finish changing," he suggests when he finally pulls away. My eyes flutter open. "We can retire when you are done."

I give him a suspicious glare. "Are you trying to get into my pants?"

I get an amused smile in response. "I would require your heart for that particular activity," he responds. "Although I suppose my silver tongue could make you wish for much."

I blush and look away. And I know he can see it. He chuckles at my reaction. "I will so judo flip you," I threaten as I walk towards my closet.

"Mm, sounds like fun."

It's official. This man is going to be the death of me. I strip the lace top off and slip on an oversized T-shirt. I know, so sexy. I come out glaring at him. He simply smiles in response. I move onto my bed and he follows. I pin him a suspicious stare when he sits on it to which he holds his hands out in the universal "I'm innocent" gesture. Yeah, I don't buy it. But, I suppose I can trust him for tonight. I wrap my arms around his stomach and rest my head against his chest. I listen to his heart beat while his hand trails through my hair. I drift off to the steady beat, thinking vaguely that this is certainly going to be a new adventure, dating the God of Mischief himself.

I can't help but feel excited.