What You Missed On Glee: Finchel Edition Chapter 37: Blame It On The Alcohol, a glee fanfic

Hey guys! Thanks for all your reviews on the last chapter. This was one of my favorite Season 2 episodes, so I had fun with this. I've always wondered how Brittany heard "My Headband" - so in this chapter, we get to find out! Also, as much as I love both Finchel and Klaine, I have a guilty pleasure for Rachel/Blaine as a crackship, so I got to have some fun with that here! Anyway, enjoy this chapter and review if you want me to keep going!

Chapter 37: Blame It On The Alcohol

Finn had told Rachel that she could do the songwriting on her own, but it was proving to be harder than she thought. As she sat in the choir room trying to think of a song, she thought about how much easier it would be if she had someone else to help her out. Finn hadn't wanted to do it with her and no one else in glee had told her that they liked the idea (in fact, they all wanted to do My Chemical Romance instead). She wasn't fond of any of the songs she'd come up with so far. She'd sent a text to Finn, asking him to come and maybe hear what she'd come up with. Right after Rachel sent the text, Brittany came into the choir room. "Hey Brittany," Rachel said.

"Hey Rachel," Brittany said. "I forgot my bookbag in here. What are you doing here?"

Rachel was embarrassed to tell Brittany that she was still interested in writing songs for Regionals. "Oh, just trying to write a few songs, you know, for fun."

"You should write a song about Lord Tubbington!" Brittany said.

"Your cat?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, totally," Brittany said.

Well, Brittany had at least never been particularly mean to Rachel. "Want to hear one of the songs I wrote?"

"Sure," Brittany said.

"This one's called My Headband," Rachel said. She wasn't sure if this was going anywhere, but maybe it could work. She played a few notes on the piano and began to sing.

There you rest
With all the rest
Of my accessories on my night stand
You're red or yellow
And like a good fellow
Sometimes you get lost in my mess
But when schoolgirl pigtails won't do,
And I need to control my 'do,
You're the only one I can count on
My headband
You're my headband
Wrapped right around my melon
You're a product like Magellan...

"Wow Rachel, I love that!" Brittany said. "Maybe that's the type of trend you should set."

Rachel felt a little better now. "You think it's good?"

"Yeah, it's great!" Brittany said. "You should sing it in glee club tomorrow." As Brittany left the choir room, Puck came in and sat next to Rachel. "What's up, my hot, little Jewish-American Princess?"

Rachel wasn't happy to see Puck. Ever since she and Finn broke up, she'd been trying to avoid him. "What do you want, Puckerman?"

"Well, word on the street is that your dads are out of town, and you're all alone in your house," Puck said.

"They are on the Rosie O'Donnell cruise. Was that..." Rachel began. Wait. How did he even know about that? "Who told you that?"

"This is the kind of information a guy like me tends to know. So, uh, party this Saturday? I'll bring the beer ball. That's a mini-keg," Puck suggested.

Rachel shook her head. Her dads would not like it if she had a party while they were out of town. "Forget it."

"Oh, come on," Puck protested. "Just the Glee kids. We're losing our minds, all stressed about Sectionals and stuff."

"Regionals. Besides, you just want a place to have sex and get drunk," Rachel said. She knew that was true.

"Yeah. There's a word for that: a party," Puck said.

"No," Rachel repeated. "My dads, they left me alone in my house because they trusted me to be responsible." She knew they wouldn't if she had a party though.

"They left you alone 'cause you suck and are a total bore," Puck snapped as he started to leave and Finn came in.

"Hey. How's the song writing going?" Finn asked.

Rachel tried to put on a convincing face. "Hey. It's going amazing. I think I might have a really big hit here, which is why I wanted you to come by. I want you to hear it." That wasn't true, but maybe a little confidence would help her get Finn back.

"Oh. Yeah. Cool," Finn said.

"Come here," Rachel said. As Finn came over, Rachel gave Finn a big hug. She'd missed his hugs and she'd almost forgotten how good they felt.

"What was that for?" Finn asked.

Rachel tried to think fast. "To break the tension. We were boyfriend and girlfriend, Finn. It's silly for us to pretend like we aren't comfortable around each other."

Finn gave Rachel a half smile. "Yeah. Totally."

"And I know that we have some unresolved feelings, but like my two new role models Carole King and Gerry Goffin, I think it's important that we just put them aside and stay focused on our mission which is just to write an amazing song to win Regionals with," Rachel said. Yes, there were unresolved feelings.

Finn shrugged. "Well, I have no idea who those people are, but I'm on board. Let's hear it."

Rachel figured she'd sing the one Brittany had liked. If Brittany liked it, maybe Finn would, too. "Okay. It's just... It's a little rough, but, uh... I think it's really special, so..." She played a few notes and then began singing.

Finn held up his hand. "Hold on. Is this song about your headband?"

Hadn't he figured it out. "Yes. It's called, My Headband."

"Right," Finn said, not sounding impressed.

"They say you should write about what you know," Rachel said.

"Well, it's really interesting," Finn stuttered. "But it's not emotional or, like, good."

Rachel had a feeling she shouldn't have taken Brittany seriously. "It sucks."

Finn nodded. "Yeah."

"How am I supposed to write a song like Joni Mitchell or Carole King?" Rachel asked both herself and Finn. "They've lived."

"Well, maybe if you want to be an artist like them, you should do a little living," Finn said.

Rachel realized Finn was right. She lived such a sheltered life in comparison to her peers. "You're so right. I mean, even now, it's Alcohol Awareness Week, and we're supposed to sing songs about the dangers of drinking, and I've never even had a drink."

"Wait, seriously?" Finn asked.

Rachel started to leave. She remembered what Puck had suggested earlier. It was time to stop being a goody goody and break some rules. "Wait. Where are you going?" Finn called.

Rachel turned around. "To find Puckerman. You know, my journey from little princess to natural woman begins this Saturday night at my house."

Finn wasn't sure if this had been a good idea.

Rachel had texted the entire glee club, telling them to come to her house at 8 p.m. on Saturday night. Finn had tried drinking before, but his mom had been furious. Now that he thought about it, the drinks hadn't tasted that good anyway, and he hadn't felt well afterwards.

It was the night of the party. Finn didn't even want to go, but the rest of the glee club had nominated him to be the one to drive everyone home. All he wanted to do was sit in his room and look at the pictures of him and Rachel on Facebook.

"Finn, are you almost ready?" Finn looked up and saw Kurt and Blaine in his doorway.

"I thought this party was just for the glee club," Finn said.

"Please, I'm still part of the glee club," Kurt said. He looked at Finn's computer screen. "Are you Facebook stalking Rachel?"

Finn looked away. "No. Just seeing what came up in my news feed."

"Finn, those photos are from Sectionals last year," Kurt said as he took a closer look.

"I think you're still into her," Blaine said.

Kurt clicked some buttons. "Finn, you've spent all night looking at her photos!"

"Kurt, what I do on my computer is my thing!" Finn said.

"Sure," Kurt said. "I won't tell anyone you've been obsessively Facebook stalking Rachel if you let Blaine and me go to the party with you."

Finn would be in trouble if Quinn found out. They had after all started tentatively dating again. Finn didn't even know why. He hadn't even enjoyed himself on those dates.

"Let's go!" Kurt cheered. The three of them drove to Rachel's house, and when Rachel answered the door, Finn was immediately taken aback. Rachel was wearing - Finn didn't even know what that thing was that she was wearing. Some green dress with a bunch of lace - it looked like the type of nightgown someone would sleep in in the 1800s. Finn saw Kurt smirking and he knew why. Finn didn't even know where Carole bought most of his clothes, but he knew that thing Rachel was wearing was awful.

"Welcome," Rachel said as she led them inside. "Kurt, Blaine, I wasn't expecting you guys."

"Kurt's been blackmailing me ever since he saw my browser history," Finn whispered to Rachel as they went to the basement. "He kind of insisted on coming."

"I'm totally off the clock right now, Rachel," Blaine said. "I'm not a Warbler. I'm just Blaine. I'm not even wearing my uniform."

"So, this is your dads' Oscar Room," Kurt said as they looked around.

"Yes. They transformed our ordinary basement for our famous annual Oscar parties," Rachel said.

"Is that a stage?" Blaine asked.

"I like to give impromptu performances for our neighbors sometimes," Rachel said.

Yes. Finn knew that. He and Rachel would sing duets on that stage. He looked around the basement. Everyone looked really bored. He felt bad for Rachel. This was the first party she'd ever hosted and no one was having any fun. Rachel didn't seem bothered though. She got out some red tickets. "Let's go over the rules. Everybody gets two drink tickets to keep things from getting out of hand. We're serving wine coolers today. That is our specialty drink. That's actually all that we have." She looked around. "Brittany! Remember the rules. No sitting on anything." She smiled at everyone. "Okay. Okay, everybody. Cheers!"

Artie, Brittany, Mike and Tina came over to Rachel. "Great party, Rachel. We got to run," Artie said.

"Yeah, dinner reservations," Tina added.

"But we haven't even played Celebrity yet," Rachel protested. "Why is everybody leaving?"

"Because this party blows," Puck snapped. "Look, if you want everyone to stay, you have to let me break into your dads' liquor cabinet. No one's gonna get buzzed off two wine coolers. I'll replace it before they get home."

Rachel looked at Finn. He could tell this meant that Rachel wasn't sure if she liked this idea. Finn reluctantly nodded. He wasn't supposed to be too attached to Rachel.

"Let's party!" Rachel shouted.

Puck went to Hiram and LeRoy's liquor cabinet and somehow managed to open the lock. Everyone else ran to get drinks, and Finn still couldn't take his eye off Rachel as she gulped down a drink.

"Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug!" Puck and Lauren shouted, egging Rachel on.

"It tastes like pink. It tastes like pink!" Rachel laughed. As Rachel reached for another drink, Finn looked around. The speed at which people were swallowing these drinks was a bit disturbing. This was the most drunk he'd seen most of them.

"Are you not drinking?" Kurt asked, coming over to Finn.

"No. Designated driver," Finn explained. "What about you?"

"I'm still trying to impress Blaine. Can't get too sloppy," Kurt said. They both looked over at Blaine, who was dancing like he had a seizure. "Clearly, he doesn't have the same concern."

Blaine came over and put his arm around Finn. "Hey! It is so cool that you and Kurt are brothers. Right? Like, brothers! Wow! You're so tall."

"You having fun, Blaine?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah. This is the best party ever!" Blaine shouted.

Rachel came over to Finn. "Finny. Dance with me." She sounded even worse than before, and Finn was wondering if Puck had slipped something into her drinks. Rachel began swaying with Finn. "We had it going on, right? I wasn't making it up or anything? I would do anything for you. Anything!"

Yes, they had it going on. And he would do anything for her. But right now, he couldn't. He'd sort of started dating Quinn. And even though she was drunk, Rachel was being pretty pathetic. Finn helped her sit down. "Okay, Rachel. Since this is your first time at this, I'm going to break it down for you. Guys and girls fall into certain archetypes when they get drunk. Exhibit A, Santana, the weepy, hysterical drunk." He pointed to Santana, who was crying to Sam about how she thought he was more into Quinn than into her. Since when were those two dating anyway? Then he pointed at Lauren and Quinn, who were both yelling at Puck. "Lauren Zizes and Quinn, the angry girl drunks." Next he pointed to Brittany, who was taking off her clothes as Artie threw money at her. "Brittany, also known as the girl who turns into a stripper drunk." He then pointed at Mercedes and Tina, who were laughing hysterically. "Mercedes and Tina, happy girl drunks, and then we come around full circle right back to you, Rachel. And right now, you're being the needy girl drunk. Hanging all over me, being overly lovey. It's not cool."

Rachel may have been drunk, but she wasn't drunk enough to clearly be hurt. She pulled away from Finn. "What kind of girl is this?" She stood up. "Let's play spin the bottle! Who wants to play spin the bottle?"

Oh no. That wasn't a good idea at all. What if Rachel kissed someone else? And worse, what if that someone else liked it?

Everyone except Finn seemed to like the idea of spin the bottle, much to Finn's surprise. Had just about everyone forgotten that they were with people? The first few spins weren't much of anything. When Tina had spun the bottle, it had landed on Finn. Mike pulled Tina off Finn before it could amount to anything, but Finn couldn't help but wish it was Rachel.

Now it was Rachel's turn. Maybe the bottle would land on Finn. Maybe...

No. It landed on Blaine. Well, Blaine was gay, right? This couldn't do any harm. "Blaine Warbler, I'm gonna rock your world," Rachel said.

To Finn's horror, Rachel and Blaine's kiss lasted longer than anyone else's had. And even worse, they seemed to be more into it than any couple that had kissed yet. Everyone else was cheering them on. Well, everyone but Finn and Kurt. "Okay, I think we've had enough of that," Kurt said, pulling Rachel and Blaine off each other. If Kurt hadn't done that, Finn probably would have.

But Rachel was still looking at Blaine. "Your face... tastes awesome. I think I just found a new duet partner!"

Rachel went off with Blaine. Not with Finn. With Blaine. A few minutes later, Rachel and Blaine both came back. Rachel turned on the stereo and they got on the stage and began singing.

Blaine: You were working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when I met you...
I picked you out, I shook you up, and turned you around, turned you into someone new
Don't, don't you want me?
You know I can't believe it
When I hear that you won't see me
Blaine and Rachel: It's much too late to find
You think you've changed your mind
You'd better change it back, or we will both be sorry
Don't you want me, baby?
Don't you want me, ohh
Don't you want me, baby?
Don't you want me, ohh
Rachel: I was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
That much is true,
But even then I knew I'd find a much better place
Either with or without you
Blaine: Don't, (Rachel: Don't,) don't you want me? (Rachel: don't you want me?)
Blaine: You know I can't believe it
Blaine and Rachel: When I hear that you won't see me.
Don't, (Rachel: Don't,)
Blaine (Rachel): Don't you want me? (don't you want me?)
You know I don't believe you
Blaine with Rachel: When you say that you don't need me.
It's much too late to find.
When you think you've changed your mind,
You'd better change it back or we will both be sorry
Don't you want me, baby?
Don't you want me, ohh
Don't you want me, baby?
Don't you want me, ohh

Rachel was singing with Blaine. Rachel was having a good time with Blaine. At the end of the song, Rachel went off with Blaine again. Finn couldn't help but wish that he was in Blaine's position.

Since just about everyone else was involved with their own things in the basement, Finn went upstairs. He needed a little break. What he found upstairs wasn't a relief at all though.

Rachel and Blaine were making out on the living room couch.

Finn went back downstairs. As drunk as everyone else was, at least he didn't have to watch the girl he still loved making out with another boy down there. He couldn't wait to drive everyone home.

Rachel was feeling better by Monday, but there was something about this weekend that she couldn't get out of her mind. Blaine.

Clearly Finn wasn't interested in getting back together with her. It sucked. But there really wasn't anything Rachel could do about it. To be fair, she couldn't blame him. She was the one who'd made out with Puck.

There was no way she'd want to get back with Puck. He was too out of control for her. She knew Puck's main interest in relationships was sex and she wasn't interested in that. She also knew she didn't want to get back with Jesse. He was too full of himself, he encouraged her worst qualities, he was mean to everyone she cared about and he was too Broadway-centered.

But Blaine - Rachel had never thought about him before because she thought he was gay, but maybe it could work with Blaine. Blaine was nice. When Kurt had come to spy on the Warblers, he reached out to Kurt rather than trying to sabotage the New Directions. It had felt really good when they'd kissed, and their voices had sounded good together.

Maybe Blaine would be willing to give things a shot? Rachel picked up her phone and dialed Blaine's number. "Hi, Rachel! Kurt and I were just talking about you," Blaine said as he answered the phone."

Blaine and Kurt were talking about her? Maybe Blaine was into her! "You're such a cutie pie with your blazer and your pants," Rachel giggled. "So... I have a question for you. I wanted to know, would you like to go out with me?"

"Uh, yeah," Blaine said.

He said yes? This was perfect! "The revival theatre's doing Love Story tomorrow, maybe want to go to dinner and go to it?" Rachel asked.

"All right, I'll see you then," Blaine said.

"Great!" Rachel said. "Bye."

"Okay, bye," Rachel said.

Rachel was dressed up as one of the characters from Love Story. She knew it was kind of stupid, but she always liked to go all out when she went to the theatre.

Blaine's car pulled up in front of her house, and she was surprised when he got out. He was dressed as one of the characters from the show, too. Rachel had to smile to herself.

"Hey!" Blaine said, coming up the steps. "You ready to go?"

Rachel smiled. "Yeah." She headed to Blaine's car with him. "I was surprised you wanted to go out with me. Kurt made me think you were gay."

"I've never been with anyone, boy or girl," Blaine said. "Kurt's pretty annoyed that we're going out tonight, but not everyone can be as sure of their sexuality as he is."

"Maybe you're bisexual," Rachel suggested.

"Yeah, that's what I was thinking," Blaine said. "I've never really been attracted to a girl before, so I just assumed I was gay."

"Well, we can't always be sure of anything," Rachel said. She'd learned that in the past few weeks.

"Yeah," Blaine said. "So, are you ready for Regionals?"

Rachel sighed. "I'm sure you guys are going to beat us. You and Kurt are so talented."

"You're pretty talented yourself," Blaine said. "And so is Finn."

"We're lucky to even be going to Regionals, our setlist at Sectionals was awful," Rachel said. Between the weak setlist and her breakup with Finn, she was trying to put Sectionals out of her mind. "I want to do original songs at Regionals, but everyone else thinks that's a bad idea. Plus, writing songs has been harder than I thought it would be."

"Have you tried writing any songs?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah, I wrote one about my headband," Rachel said. "Brittany liked it, but Finn said it sucked."

"Your headband?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah," Rachel said with a small giggle.

Blaine pulled up at Breadstix and Rachel got out of the car. Blaine held out his hand for Rachel, and Rachel took it.

The rest of the evening with Blaine was great, but Rachel still hadn't cleaned up from after her party. When Blaine dropped her off at home, Rachel went to the basement and started to clean when she heard the doorbell ring. She went upstairs and saw Kurt.

"Hey," Rachel said. "What's up?"

"What's up with you?" Kurt asked.

"I was just cleaning up from the party," Rachel said.

"I'll help you," Kurt said.

"Okay," Rachel said. She led Kurt to the basement and continued cleaning. "Thanks for helping with the party cleanup. Especially considering that you didn't even drink.

"Well, I was in the neighborhood," Kurt said.

Rachel had a feeling she knew why Kurt was really here. "At 10:00? Are you sure you're not here just to find out how my date with Blaine went?"

"Oh, was that tonight?" Kurt asked.

"Look, we're friends, so I'm gonna be honest with you," Rachel said. "The date was lovely. We saw Love Story at the Revival Theater. We even dressed up as the characters."

Kurt smirked. "That's not gay at all. Did you kiss?"

That was the one disappointment for Rachel. "No. Our lips spent the evening mouthing Ali McGraw's dialogue. Frankly, I did expect a little snog as the date drew to a close, but I guess the timing just wasn't right."

"Or the blood-alcohol level," Kurt mumbled.

"Look, I know that you have feelings for him, and I'm sure you think I'm crazy for asking him out, but Blaine is obviously conflicted, and if he turns out not to be gay, well, then I guess I will have done you a favor," Rachel said. She had felt something between her and Blaine.

"And I'm doing you a favor by telling you that Blaine is the first of a long line of conflicted men that you will date that will later turn out to be only the most flaming of homosexuals," Kurt shot back.

"Blaine and I have a lot in common," Rachel protested.

Kurt didn't look convinced. "A sentiment expressed by many a hag about many a gay. Look, I don't doubt that you and Blaine would have a jolly good time shopping at Burberry and arguing who would make the better Rum Tum Tugger, I don't dispute that, but there's something you and Blaine'll never have, and that's chemistry."

"Fine," Rachel said. "Then I'm gonna prove you wrong. I'm gonna take the beer goggles off, and I'm gonna kiss him sober. And if the spark is still there, then I'm taking you to your bakery of choice for a piping hot slice of humble pie."

"Deal," Kurt said. "Tomorrow, you can meet up with him at the coffee shop. I'll go too so I can watch."

The next day, Rachel and Kurt were at the coffee shop, waiting for Blaine to arrive. "So, you said he comes this way at 3:30?" Rachel asked.

"Like clockwork. For his post-rehearsal medium drip," Kurt said.

"I just can't wait to lay one on him," Rachel said. Why hadn't Blaine kissed her last night?

"I've got a bad feeling about this, Rachel," Kurt admitted. "I mean, I don't mean to be schooled, but I don't want you to get hurt, either. There's no victory in this for me, either way."

Rachel still couldn't stop thinking about her and Blaine. "Who cares about you, buddy? I might get a new boyfriend out of this, who can keep up with me vocally, and in the future, give me vaguely Eurasian looking children." Then she realized she'd been a little mean to Kurt.

Blaine came in. "There he is. Dreamy as ever," Kurt said.

Rachel took a deep breath. "Okay. Wish me luck."

"Hey, Rachel. What's going on?" Blaine said.

Rachel didn't even give Blaine time to answer. She leaned in and kissed him.

Blaine pulled apart. "Huh. Yep. I'm gay. 100% gay. Thank you so much for clearing that up for me, Rachel. Listen, save my space in line, will you? I got to go hit the restroom."

So Kurt was right. Blaine was gay.

"That was hard, wasn't it?" Kurt asked Rachel.

Rachel decided not to let Kurt think she was upset, but she was. "Are you kidding? That was amazing. I am speechless. I just had a relationship with a guy who turned out to be gay. That is songwriting gold."

Maybe she could write a song about this. She couldn't help that Blaine wanted to experiment. But on top of everything else, it stung.

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