...not dead.

A special thanks to Awerry, GayMexicanBatman, NotCharlotte, Beachwishen, BelowtheFire, TheLoverOfLit, Valdra Dae, Zyophia Clari, skullcandygirl21, EmmaRipley, NyxOwl3579, ShikiSalamander, SlvrSrpnt, and Taywawa for the reviews, follows, and favorites. I haven't abandoned this story guys, I promise! Life doesn't chill, even when you want it too. What keeps me going is the love and support I see from y'all on this story. Thank you all so much.

The case was a…difficult one, to say the least. Keila was wary of Travis the minute that they walked into the motel room and his eyes locked onto hers. She could see the pain in his eyes, the darkness that swirled around in them from all of the horrors he had seen from his time hunting. That's not the part that bothered her the most. What bothered her was how he talked about the creatures that he dealt with.

Now, she understood where this hatred came from, the terror and agony that these monsters brought onto other was horrendous in itself. But, she couldn't help but feel the small tug in her stomach when she found out their suspect was born with the gene. It was thrust upon him without his warrant, much like hers had been, and it was hard. It was hard on her, and it was hard on Sam.

She could see the way he struggled with this case, watched the battle within his head, with Travis, with his brother. He was trying to prove to them that sometimes they had a choice. They could choose whether they fell into the temptation, or whether they could fight it. And, he had wanted Jack, the human man who was rapidly turning into a rugaru, to have that choice.

It bit them all in the ass in the end, actually tore Travis to pieces, which was hard to walk up on. And, despite everything that same had been hoping for, it all fell to the wayside when he lit Travis on fire in his own living room, Dean crumpled against the coffee table, and Keila bound and gagged on the couch.

After the case was said and done with, the drive out of the town was filled with a tense silence. Throughout the entire case, Keila could feel the tension between the two brothers, and she knew it was about to hit its crescendo. Which, made her wish that she could meld into the backseat of the Impala until the whole ordeal was over with. She felt bad for basically third-wheeling the brother's issues, and she was so happy that her iPod was fully charged.

As the trees flew past her window, Keila couldn't shake the tension that was in her body. Watching Jack succumb to his monstrous genetics put a bit of fear in her. She knew the struggles that the man faced, more so than Sam did, because her demonic blood was kinked inside her DNA. She could often feel the tug of powerful energy pulling at her, making her skin tingle as if she were about to be struck by lightning. And, sometimes her mind ran into some of the deepest, blackest pits, reminding her of the monster she truly was.

Frowning to herself, Keila let out a small huff.

She would never be given the chance for redemption.

"You did the right thing, you know. That guy was a monster, there was no going back." Keila glanced towards the front of the car, watching Dean give out a muffled response as Sam lowered his head. She discreetly lowered the volume that was blaring from her earbuds and looked out the window again.

She didn't want to be a part of it, but then again, how could she not?

She was nosy.

"Sam, I wanna tell you I'm sorry. I've been kind of hard on you lately." Sam lifts his head slightly, forlorn eyes watching the scenery pass. Keila caught a glimpse of his face and felt her heart tighten a little.

He looks so broken.

"Don't worry about it, Dean." Dean glances towards his brother momentarily, not fully catching the pain that was etched across his face.

"It's just that your, uh, your psychic thing, it scares the crap out of me." Keila held back the snort that almost escaped through her nose. She forgot out how shit Dean was about explaining how he felt.

"Look, if it's all the same... I'd really rather not talk about it." A small smile creeps onto Dean's lips as he raises and eyebrow towards Sam. Sam continues to stare blankly at Dean before he speaks.

"Wait a minute. What? You don't want to talk? You?" Sam doesn't respond to Dean's little joke, doesn't take the bait and leaves Dean hanging in the tense atmosphere.

"There's nothing more to say. I can't keep explaining myself to you. I can't make you understand."

"Why don't you try?" Sam scrunches up his face in annoyance, letting out a ragged breath.

"I can't. Because this thing, this blood, it's not in you the way it's in me. It's just something I got to deal with."

"Not alone." Keila gave a discreet head nod, one that the younger Winchester picked up through the rearview mirror. He squinted his eyes at the woman in the back seat, but it seemed that she was just listening to her music. Her returned his attention back towards his brother.

"Anyway, it doesn't matter. These powers... it's playing with fire. I'm done with them." Dean glances over at Sam, then towards the back seat momentarily, then back towards the road.

"I'm done with everything." Keila feels her body tense at the harshness in Sam's voice. She forces herself to continue to stare out the window, but catches a glimpse of Sam's reflection.

Oh God.

"Really?" Dean lets out a deep breath that he was holding in, his shoulders relaxing ever so slightly. He casts a small smile towards his brother.

"Well, that's a relief. Thank you." Sam scoffs, turning his body towards his brother and staring at him with cold eyes.

"Don't thank me. I'm not doing it for you. Or for the angels or for anybody. This is my choice." Dean appears taken aback by Sam's outburst, but doesn't say anything, just nods his head slowly.

It was another tense 45 minutes in the Impala, before Dean pulls off the highway and into a gas station. The brothers step out of the car, both stretching out their long legs. Dean heads towards the store to pay for the gas, while Sam stays at the Impala, waiting for the credit to be applied to the machine.

Keila pushes open the back door and lays down in the seat, stretching her body against the cool leather, her feet sticking out of the car. She holds the stretch a little longer than necessary, and odd noise escaping her mouth as she finally relaxes. She places her feet on the oiled concrete outside the car, her elbows perched on her knees.

"How much of that were you listenin' in on?" She tensed for a minute, looking up bashfully as Sam's hazel eyes bore into her golden ones. She feigned a look of innocent and slight shock before she pushed herself out of the car.

"I don't know what you're talkin' about." She made leaned against the black sports car, arms crossed at her chest as she stared at the younger Winchester. A small smile tugged at the edge of his lips.

"Bullshit." Keila gasped and gently slapped Sam against the chest, his body reverberating with a chuckle at her action. She smiled at him sweetly, before responding.

"Do you know how hard it is to stay out of y'alls moments? I feel like I'm watching a Lifetime movie from the back seat." Sam smiles at her, before it slowly falls down into a frown. He huffs slightly, pushing his long hair out of his face before locking eyes with Keila's again.

"I'm sorry. I don't want you to feel like you have to choose sides." Keila smiles warmly at Sam again, placing her hand against his cheek gently.

"You don't have to worry about that, Sambo. I really don't like either one of you that much anyway." Sam can't stop the laugh that bubbles up in his throat, slightly leaning into Keila's open palm. She pats his cheek, once, twice, before she drops her hand down and crosses it back over her body. She stares at Sam for a moment, watching the temporary happiness that was in his eyes swirl and fade away, a somber look taking over.

"Sambo, I don't think you're a monster." Sam looks up at Keila, eyes slightly wide. She smiles at him again, this one soft and tender, before she brushes past him, squeezing his massive shoulder as she does.

"How can you not? Knowing the things I've done?" He swivels towards her, eyes wide and searching. Keila turns her head towards him, her long chocolate hair falling in waves over her shoulder. Her eyes glimmer with a hint of sadness as she speaks.

"Because, I know monsters, Sambo, and you're not one of them."

Comments and constructive criticism is appreciated.