The long awaited update finally makes an appearance. Short but sweet! :)
John sat in the hollow with his youngest brother leaning up against him and shaking…with laughter. It was the first time in ages that the two eldest Tracy siblings had seen Alan in such a happy state. The conversation for once hadn't been dismal or sad but lighthearted and funny; remembering previous pranks and jokes played on one another. This is how Virgil found them, he crept inside the hollow behind Scott who had his back to the outside world. The middle Tracy brother slapped his hands on his older brothers shoulders suddenly and shouted "I'M BACK!" The unsuspecting sibling jumped in surprise and instantly turned and pulled Virgil down on the floor beside him laughing along with him. Alan had jumped too at the surprise entrance and gasped when Scott tackled their brother down onto the floor where they were sat.
All the brothers stopped the antics and looked at Alan, expecting a bad response to the shock of someone that he didn't yet trust completely; but it was Alan who surprised them this time. He began to laugh again as if nothing had happened that was out of the ordinary. As the four Tracys continued to fool around and talk in the late afternoon, the youngest of them was starting to realise that "maybe everything would be okay". He whispered this statement to himself between laughs but it didn't go unheard by his older blonde brother, who he still was leaning up against.
Tracys weren't supposed to cry. They weren't supposed to show signs of weakness or hopelessness. That's what Gordon kept telling himself; though inside his head and heart, he was trying desperately not to break. He had been left with no support apart from his father who most of the time needed the support from Gordon. The redhead couldn't imagine what their father was going through; maybe it was through sympathy that he had remained loyal to him during the whole family crisis. The man had lost four of his sons to something that he didn't quite understand and only made it worse when tried to help. Now all he had left was Gordon, and all Gordon had left was a wrecked father figure.
He would have complained, he would have spoken out "it's not fair" had there been ears to hear him speak besides those of his father. It had been Gordon who had found Virgil's letter and had to report it back to Jeff. The Tracy patriarch didn't say anything but his son could easily see his eyes drop to the ground and his shoulders sink before he walked back to the villa.
Now Gordon was stuck. He knew in his head that they ALL needed to be home to sort it all out, but he also knew that if that did happen, that their father would try and take control again and things could get worse. Then there was his heart, the part of him that loved every single one of his family members and that seemed to be stuck too. His love for his only younger brother and the instinct to keep him safe willed him to remain in the jungle and not follow after his father. But the sympathy and the respect in his heart for Jeff pulled him back to the villa with his father. He felt like he was the knot in the center of the rope in a tug of war. He just stood in the clearing where they had found Virgil's bag and letter, wishing for someone, anyone to come out of the jungle surrounding him and just help him choose. Or even just talk to him. No one had thought about how he and Virgil had lasted all this time in the stalemate that was between their father and their siblings in the jungle.
Jeff worried too much about losing more of his sons and Gordon guessed that Scott, Alan and John had hated them. But now he had been proven wrong; Virgil had left. He had been accepted by two angry and overprotective older brothers and most importantly, by a terrified younger brother. A brother Gordon longed to be with but also longed to understand. To the redhead, all hope was gone. He had missed his opportunity to be with Alan, he had let his confusion fuel his anger and it got the better of him. He did truly believe that bringing his little brother home would help and like his dad, be solved in a day like the normal nightmares. But after seeing Alan as scared as he was, Gordon now wished for things to be that simple and able to be resolved that quickly.
The fourth Tracy thought back to Virgil's letter; mainly to the part that addressed him. "put yourself in his shoes like I told you. There is still hope little brother, but it's not all going to show in one day. Give it time, you'll see. Just do what you think is right and then your one step close to finding it."
He wanted more than anything to be able to take that step closer to finding hope, but he was still stuck with which direction to step. Further into the jungle? To find his brothers and have them help him and forgive him? Or to the villa? To his father who would now need his remaining son more than ever?
He hated it as he stood there in the clearing; his head battling his heart and his anger slowly seeping away. He hated it up until the point where he knew what he had to do and which way he was supposed to step to find hope.
Sorry for such a long wait between these chapters! Been so busy but should be back into writing now. Reviews are loved!
Check out my new Gordon-centered oneshot "Two-Faced Blue"! x