A/N: Ok, so here's the long explanation.. I have no computer.. Oh.. that's the short version.. Lol. Basically.. It's dead. Beyond crashed. Gone to the giant Radio Shack in the sky. 3 So, writing was a little hard.. I had to steal my Mom's to get this out..
MelMat: Haha, thanks hun. 3
Deathnotefinatic13: Yeah.. sorry.. You can blame my computer for dying. I need to raise money to get a new one too..
foreverunloved: 3 Well, here it is.. Long awaited..
Tailsdoll123: Maybe..
Miss cCc: Haha. Where's the fun in no risk?
xxMAILxxJEEVASxx: We shall see what happens. 3
Mustached Kira: Everyone wants them to tell so badly. Lol.
Chase Mihael Keehl: I know.. I know.. 3
Lilyru: Welcome to the story. 3 Unfortunate you're so late.. But thanks for all the reviews. Glad you enjoy it. 3
TwistedNachi13: Yeah.. I WANTED to update.. But it's been rough with no computer.. And of course I get all these epic ideas that I can't write! That's for your devotion though. It means a lot to me. 3
Chapter 34: In The Next Room
Mello stretched his leather clad legs out in front of him, his hands folded over his stomach. Why did they give them such uncomfortable chairs? The had waited years to get this interview with Focus, and yet, the chairs are enough to make them want to go back into hiding. His eyes were cracked open behind his sunglasses, watching Matt across the room. He was helping Beyond put his facepaint on for the show. They had agreed that as Focus, they would still use their stage names and personas. Why change what the fans loved so much? He was so glad he didn't have to do as much as Beyond or Misa before a show.
"What's wrong, Mello?" Misa was suddenly next to him, crossing her legs gracefully. Mello eyed her for a moment. She had picked out one of her best outfits for the first public interview. Her make-up was drying, so her mask was pushing her hair up, and off her face.
"Nothing. Just don't know why they use these horrible chairs." He shifted again, groaning in pain. Misa giggled behind her hand.
"Yeah, well, they are meant for sitting, not reclining." Misa laughed. Mello glared at her, even though she couldn't see it. "Now. Tell me what is really wrong." She smirked, crossing her arms over her chest.
"What are you talking about. Nothing. I'm just waiting for the divas to be ready." He sat up, and shoved her lightly on the arm. A flash went off, and he glared at the camera man that had been let back. "What the fuck? We agreed nothing until after the show!" He stood, aggrivated. Matt and Beyond were suddenly by them. Beyond pulled the camera guy away, while Matt pulled Mello in the opposite direction. Misa sat in her chair, confused.
"Ok, what the fuck is up with you?" Matt demanded. "You're so on edge. We're going out to do a public interview for the first time, and you're being an ass." Matt's voice hissed at him. Mello's jaw clenched.
"What do you want from me? This isn't easy, Matt! We agreed no cameras until after the interview." Matt watched him for a minute, his expression calculating. Mello looked away.
"No. What's really wrong? It's not about some camera guy sneaking up on you and Misa. Like you care. The world will know she's your sister and that you're gay soon. So, tell me what's really wrong." Matt's hands rested on his hips and he leaned it to talk more privately with Mello. The blonde turned and looked at him, his face inches from the red heads.
"I told you. This isn't easy." He whispered. Matt swallowed and took a step back, looking around. Mello felt a stab of pain in his chest at the action.
"If you're referring to us, I thought we talked about it. You know this is for the best. But if you want out, then just fucking say so." Matt's voice was low. Mello sneered back.
"Yeah? Maybe that's just what I need." He spat, turning and walking away. Matt took a deep breath, feeling his body shake. Biting his lip, he turned away to do the sound check, thanking whatever God was listening that he wears goggles.
(-line-)
The crowed was cheering on the other side of the curtain. Fog was raising around their feet. Matt looked over at Mello, who was making sure not to look at him. He had been making a habit of having them practice music without hearing his lyrics. It was the only way he could surprise the blonde with them. But now, he wondered if it had been a good idea. He should have changed the song to an old one last minute. But then Shiori would have asked why. With a deep breath, he turned back to look towards the crowed, hand on the mic, as the music started. The curtain rose and he put everything out of his head.
There you go, messin' with my mind
I am usually better when I lie
There i go, stuck inside a shell
And you're living on the other side
A lovers carousel
If you only
Knew
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Mello swallowed as the lyrics started to work their way into his mind and heart. So much for staying emotionless during the performance. He had planned to not look at Matt as much as possible. To just play the chords he was meant to and get lost in the music. Of course, he should have known better. He had never been able to ignore Matt when he sang. And now, he had no idea how he'd get through anything without the red head.
I lose control
When I hear your body move
Through the walls
In the next room
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I lose control
When I hear your body move
And I'm dying to break through
To the next room
Matt took a peak at Mello to see his reaction. Now he knew why the blonde always bitched about his goggles. Those sunglasses made it hard to see his eyes, and even harder to read. But he hadn't spent the past few weeks memorizing the planes of that body to not learn from it. He was stiffer than usual. He had definately been caught off guard with this. But he didn't seem mad. If anything, he seemed distracted. Matt turned his attentionback to the crowed as concealed blue eyes lifted to see him.
You make love to everything you touch
It's a natural reaction
It's a sexual attraction
You play me like I am made of strings
I'm the violin, A melody
I want your lips to sing
If you only knew
How hard it is to handle
How bad I want this scandal
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Mello had seen Matt watching him. He remembered fondly about how Matt always joked about how he didn't play the guitar, that he made love to it. He smiled to himself at the memory. The gesters Matt had made when he said it. Then the memories of Matt calling what they had a scandal. It was. His fresh break up with Near, and the speculation that Matt had cheated with Mello. It would be just what the gossip magazines wanted. Yes, it was hard. They both wanted to publically be together. But between the gossip and their friends and family, they couldn't take such a risk. He kept his eyes on the gamer as he moved around the stage, playing up the crowd. A faint smile lit up his face. He needed to talk to him. Tell him he understood. But how?
I lose control
When I hear your body move
Through the walls in the next room
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I lose control
When I hear your
Body move
And I'm dying to break through
To the next room
Oh, to the next room
Matt could feel those eyes on him as he moved. He couldn't help but add a little extra flare in his movements just for Mello's sake. If he didn't want to be with Matt anymore, then so be it. He'd show him what he was missing. Remind him of what he had wanted so deperately. And now, what he had given up. He knew that his movements became sharper with the flare of anger and hurt. But he couldn't care. Let Mello know how he felt.
Tell me 'my world revolves around you'
Tell me 'boy I can't live without you'
Tell me 'you're losing sleep tonight'
Cuz I'll tell you straight
I'll never wait
I won't take No no no no no no no no no
Oh, I won't take no no no
Mello watched Matt's body give away his anger. He frowned when he noticed a slight glare come over his shoulder. He had his work cut out for him. But Matt had just told him exactly what he wanted. What he needed. The words he wanted to hear. And Mello intended to make sure they reached his ears. And he would remind Matt that the red head claimed he'd always fight. That he wouldn't take no for an answer. That he had said he'd give Mello a swift kick in the ass if he needed it.
Oh I lose control
When I hear your body move
When I hear your body move
Ohhhoohhhhhh
My heart
You stole
Every time your body moves
I'm just dying to break through
To the next room
(I lose control
My heard you stole
I lose control)
He knew Mello was smiling at the word. Or, smirking rather. He listened to Mello sing his own lines at the end, and tried not to let it effect him. He knew that the blonde had issues with his voice effecting him, but he never realized Mello had the same effect on him. He had never told him. Now, he was glad he hadn't. It was a weapin he could use if he wanted to. A weapon Matt was glad he kept away. He didn't need to be continuously hurt. Not after what near had done to him. He stopped moving as the music and the band did, vaguely hearing the crowd cheering again. He closed his eyes as the emotions flooded him again, and he felt like the world would crush him.
(-line-)
Mello took his prearranged seat. He was right next to Misa. She was the only person between him and Matt. The gamer barely acknowledged him. He groaned as he wiggled in his seat. What was with this place and chairs? It was like a wanna be stool half chair, with a low back. Shiori was introducing them to the crowd to start off the interview. She was on one end, angled to half face them. Naomi was on the end, her arm looped with Beyond's. They had decided they could out their relationship, since they weregetting married.
"So, not that I don't love the make-up, but I think the crowd would have loved to see the face of Back-up and Rem." Shiori spoke.
"You want to see my face?" Beyond asked with a smirk. The crowd cheered, so he hopped up and ran to the other side of Mello, where L sat in his way. How he was balanced, Mello wasn't sure. Beyond wrapped his arm around L's shoulders, and pulled his mask off. "This is what I look like. He's my twin." Beyond pointed to L's face with a grin, rubbing the make-up off his face, causing it to smear.
"So this really is a band full of family, then?" Shiori spoke again as Beyond made his way back to Naomi's said. "What's with this thing with Shoko? Related? Last we heard was she was engaged to someone in law enforcement." Naomi blushed. Beyond looked at her, before claiming her lips passionately. The crowd went wild.
"No. I don't think that he's anywhere in our minds at all. He was a douche. She's marrying me in the spring." Beyond said, causing Naomi to blush deeped. He took of her sun glasses, and slid them on his shirt, looking into her eyes. Shiori cleared her throat.
"Moving on then." She giggled. "Matt, what can you tell us about this speculated relationship you have with Rem? Is it true? You admitted to having a thing for blondes. Or is it true you're gay and with Angel?" Mello felt his heart clench. Matt wouldn't even have to lie today. He heard Matt laugh lightly, and could see the women in the crowd swoon. Yeah, he knew. Matt had that effect on people.
"Neither are true, actually. Rem here is actually like the sister I never had." He laughed as a distinctive, 'HEY' was heard from off stage. "Love you, Sayu!"
"Oh, Sayu is your sister, right? As well as Light being your brother?" The focus was shifted just off stage where Light stood on guard, Sayu and Matsuda behind him.
"Yes. Light is in charge ofour security. we can get back to him when we get to L though. You asked about Angel. Well, I am gay." Matt chuckled again at the disappointed sounds from the crowd. "And, I do have a thing for blondes. However, I am not with Angel. After the Near thing, which I am not talking about today, I plan to stay single. I'm not ready to get hurt again. Mello is also one of my best friends." Mello felt his heart shatter.
"Now, Matt. I heard you have the most stunning green eyes. Are you going to show them off to us?" Shirori suggested. Matt blushed. Mello knew he hated showing his eyes. They were too expressive in his mind. A surge of possessiveness entered him at the thought of sharing those beauties with the world.
"Alright. I hardly show them, even outside of Focus. I hate when people can see them, but just this once, I'll show them willingly." He reached up and pulled his goggles down around his neck, smiling sheepishly. Mello had to bite the inside of his cheek.
"Ok, Rem. Is it true that you're a double celeberty?" Shiori moved on.
"Yes, actually. I am not however, smearing my paint like B did. Most of you would know me better as Misa-Misa." She smiled. There was a mixture of gasps and cat calls among the crowd. "And I'd like to say, that I too see Matt as the brother I never had."
"Ouch." Mello hissed jokingly. Misa nudged him.
"I'm just kidding." She winked. "Mello here is my real brother."
"Which is why the headlines that I was dating her were disgusting." He smirked. She rolled her eyes.
"Ok, Angel.. Or Mello. Your turn. I heard Matt has the killer green and you the icy blue." Shiori smiled. Mello stared at her for a moment, before pulling his glasses off, his cold eyes reaching the spectators. The smirk making it more menacing. "Wow, what a set you have. Matt, Mello, and Beyond with his unnatural red. Now, Mello. You're very open about being gay as well, right?"
"Right." Mello smiled as the crowd was disappointed once again. He knew he effected the crowd just as Matt did. Not in the same way, but he demanded attention. He was Mello, for fucks sake! He caught Matt's eyes for a moment, finally thankful Shiori had him remove his goggles. His eyes would always betray him to Mello. The underlining want in them, along with the regret and hurt. He tried to silently apologize as he heard Shiori move on to L.
"Ryuzaki. Matt said we could get back to Light with you. What's that about?" Shiori asked innocently.
"He is my husband." L stated simply. Light moved out when L gestured to him, and kissed him sweetly on the lips in a chaste kiss. The crowd 'awwed.'
The questions continued on, and Mello listened with half an ear, trying not to look at Matt. They all goofed around a bit, with the relief that they didn't have to be careful about what they said anymore. And soon, the interview was wrapping up, and they were walking out while the crowd was wild again, They got into the limo, and took off the Wammy House. Mello was trying to get Matt's attention. Trying to figure out how to get the man alone, but figured he could at the house at some point.
"Alright guys. I'm beat. I'll see you tomorrow." Matt said upon exiting the limo, walking to his car without even looking over his shoulder. Everyone stared at one another confused. They had intended to party tonight, in celebration of their first live interview and performance that was on Nationl TV. Mello felt a shing behind his eyes as he watched the Chevy Chevelle sped away, kicking up dust and gravel as he went.
"I wonder what's wrong with him." Misa mused aloud.
"Maybe he's right. I think we're all tired. We can party when we're all rested enough that the first hit won't knock us on our ass." Naomi reasoned.
"What fun is that?" Beyond pouted. Naomi backhanded his chest.
"I didn't say we couldn't have a private party." She winked. Beyond perked at the comment.
"She's right. Party later. See ya!" He lifted her into his arms and all but ran into the house.
"I guess I'll be dragging my husband along to break in his bed as a married couple now. Matsuda, I trust you to take care od Sayu." Light said, lacing his fingers with L's, kissing the knuckles.
"Our bed." Was L's reply as they walked off.
"That was disgustingly sweet." Mello laughed, his heart clenching.
"No kidding. Mel, let's get home so we can rest. Are you coming with us, Teru?" She eyed her boyfriend who nodded. Mello rolled his eyes.
"I'm fucking surrounded." He joked.
"Do you think that being here was too much for Matt? He just found out about Near in London. He hasn't been here yet since." Misa suddenly perked. Mello's heart clenched harder. Wasn't Matt over that big headed twit? Was he wrong? Did his retreat have less to do with him, and more to do with Near? Had he read too much into his relationship with the gamer? After all, he had loved Near, whereas all he did was sneak around with Mello.
"Let's go, Misa." He said, the sting getting stronger behind his eyes as he turned to walk towards her car. Misa and Mikami followed as he climbed into the backseat, laying down and pretending to fall asleep.
"I wonder what's wrong with him." Misa mused aloud. Mikami rested a hand on hers as she put the car in geer.
"I'm sure he'll be ok, love." She smiled at him as they pulled into the road. Mello smiled to himself. At least his sister was taken care of.
(-line-)
Matt couldn't sleep. He was playing Zelda on his Super Nintendo, half paying attention. This game was so easy, he could do it in his sleep. But he couldn't focus on anything harder. His mind was plagued with memories and images of Mello. The hurt was still fresh in his chest. Then pulling up to Wammy House, brought back the memories of how Near played him. He was just so angry and hurt, he couldn't stay there. It had started raining an hour ago, and he was brought to memories of that first night Mello was in his life. That night, he had crawled into Near's bed, to wait for his return, and Mello? He had crawled into B's. Anger and jealousy flared and he threw his controller towards the TV. He wished he could sleep. But after a nap, he was awake at 3 in the morning. He was still used to London time, it seemed. A knock on the door made him look up at it confused. He stood, straightening his sweat pants as he headed towards it. Looking out the peep hole, he saw blonde hair.
"What do you want, Mello?" He asked coldly.
"We need to talk. Please, let me in, Matt." came the reply. Mello's voice sounded defeated, with a tremer in his voice.
"I don't want to talk to you." He spat angrily.
"Matt, please. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I was just so angry and jealous. Watching all those woman fawn over you. It drove me mad." He defended weakly. Matt saw red. He flung the door open, his face the very visionof anger.
"I'm fucking gay, asshole!" His face crumbled when he saw Mello. He was still in his concert clothes. He was soaking wet, hair wind blown, and his eyes red. "Mello.." His voice was a whisper as he pulled the blonde into his arms.
"Matt. I'm sorry. I am." The blonde clung to him tightly.
"Did you walk here in this weather?" He asked, appauled. Mello just shrugged.
"I couldn't exactly wake Misa and Mikami." He whispered. Matt pulled back and smacked him across the face.
"Then call me! I can't believe how stupid you can be! Of all the stunts to pull! You could get deathly ill from this! And for what? And why the fuck are you smiling?" Mello's smile was small, almost sad.
"I just didn't expect you to care. But for what? For you. For us." Matt sighed, his shoulders slumping.
"Of course I care, Mello. And what us? You broke up with me today." He moved to turn away from the blonde, but was stopped by a cold hand.
"Well, I take it back." He smirked. Matt looked at him like he was stupid.
"You can't just take it back. You hurt me." It was Matt's turn to let his voice drop to a whisper.
"Matt. My world does revolve around you. I can't live without you. And if it were up to me, you really wouldn't get any sleep tonight. I spoke out of anger from the thought that you didn't want me." He moved his body close to Matt's, enjoying the feel of the shudder through his half naked body.
"Mello.." He whispered, eyes lidded as a hand cupped his cheek. Lips descended onto his own, capturing his own in a passionate and hungry kiss. Matt's knees buckled, and the blonde lifted him up, wrapping his legs around his waist. "I don't want to get hurt again, Mello." His voice cracked as he tried to pull away.
"No. I won't let you get hurt again. I'll do my best to talk to you. Not talk from anger. We'll fight, but I promise, we'll always make up." He kissed Matt again, swallowing a moan.
"Mello, please. I need you." Matt squirmed inhis arms, squeezing his waist with his legs.
"But, the deal. You said-"
"Yeah, about that. You know, I'm still on London time.." Matt trailed off, his green eyes lingering over Mello's body. The blonde smirked.
"Oh? Yeah, that sounds like a real problem that I intend to take full advantage of." Mello said, carrying the red head to his room, and depositing him on the bed. Matt watched as his leather jacket fell to the ground, his vest quickly following. Feet lifted one at a time, boots being removed. The blonde battled his wet leather pants, butfinally got them off. He moved over Matt, pulling his sweats off. "Taking a page from my book, Matty?" He smirked, gesturing to Matt's lack of underwear.
"Yeah, well. I was expecting someone, but I guess I should cancel on him, since you're here." Matt joked. Mello growled when the doorbell rang. "Oops, too late." Mello jumped up, and stomped out the room the the door.
"Ok, fucker, take a hike, he's mine!" Mello yelled, as he flung it open, revealing a scared pizza delivery man. Matt appeared, handing him a large bill, mumuring an apology and telling him to keep the change. Mello slammed the door and watched Matt walk and set the box onthe bar that connected to the kitchen, his erection bobbing as he walked.
"You realize that he just got a show?" Matt smirked. Mello stared at him, seething. "What?" Matt asked, feigning innocence, as he took a bit of pizza. "Want some? It's sausage." A saucy wink accompanied the comment.
"I'll give you sausage." Mello finally spoke, grabbing Matt once again, and slamming him to the wall. Matt moaned, pizza forgotten.
"That's it Mello." Matt's back arched. "There's no oneclose enough to hear us scream. A devilish smirk crossed both sets of lips before they joined together in a hungry kiss.
"In that case.." Mello lifted Matt once again, shoving into him without any preparation. Matt's head slammed back into the wall with a cry of pain and pleasure, as he thrust back against Mello's hips.
"Yessss.." He hissed. "Is that all you've got, Mels?" Matt taunted. Mello growled, pulling him off the wall, and slamming his body into it again, then slamming his hands above his head, pulling out and forcing himself back inroughly. They moved together. Matt taunting, and Mello retaliating.
"Holy Jeevas." There was a twinkle in Matt's eyes as he heard Mello's words. "Fuck. Never been better. God.. Matt, you don't even know what you do to me." Mello spoke into his ear. Matt moaned, his back arching.
"Probably what you do to me." He panted, freeing his hands and Mello's bruised his hips. He treaded his fingers into golden locks, and tugged roughly, as he released between them. Mello followed with his own cry, and they crumbled to the floor. "You realize that we still can't come out together, right?" Matt whispered, hesitantly. Mello sighed.
"It's worth it." He kissed his lover on the lips. "I'm in this til the very end. Ya ha-chu, chto-bee mee vseg-da bee-li vmes-te. Ya ne ma-gu bez te-bya zshit'." Matt looked at him questioningly, but Mello shook his head and kissed him.
"I believe you said if you had it your way, I wouldn't get any sleep?" Matt smiled mischivously. Mello returned the lust filled gaze.
"I did, didn't I?" He pulled Matt up and back towards the room, grabbing the pizza as well. Tomorrow, they would part and their lide together would remain a secret. Mello didn't know for how long, but he would wait for as long as Matt needed him to.
end
A/N: OMG.. Focus is really done? *cries* I do have to admit, I can't wait to get to focus on Wammy High. I have so many ideas for it, and this one ending is bittersweet to me. Thank you all for sticking with me. I love you. I am grateful, and surprised with how big this story, and myself as an author have gotten.
Song used in Chapter:
"In the Next Room" by Neon trees.
Translate (Russian.. I googled.. If it's wrong, let me know):
"I want us to be together forever. I can't live without you."