A/N:
For those of you wondering, Prim didn't give Paavo nightlock. Daphne mezereum is a plant found in taiga biomes with poisonous berries- I was trying to be climate-specific :)

Chapter 37:

I cannot bring myself to take my eyes away from the TV screen. I know that Peeta is still beside me, I can feel him look my way- but I can't face him yet. I just stare straight ahead.

As soon as the cannon booms, Annella and Mouseface approach the area where Prim sits, and Jack and now a deceased Paavo lay. Annella just smiles at Prim, says to her 'I knew you could do it, girl,' in a confident voice, and sits down beside her, putting her arm around Prim's shoulders and pulling her close for a hug.

Prim replies, "Annella, don't. I feel awful. He was my district partner! But when I was asking him questions just a couple of minutes ago, he basically said- not his exact words, I'm paraphrasing here- but he basically said that he might have attacked you guys, that he wanted only the two of us to be left. Obviously he didn't care about the rest of you. We're all in this together now- that just isn't right. I had to do it- preemptively- to protect our alliance."

I suppose that it doesn't matter at this point whether the Capitol knows about the alliance- because the four tributes that remain aren't going to fight each other- so if the Captiol didn't about it already than they will figure it out real quick. The million dollar question is- what are they going to do in response? Of course my hunch is that they will try to throw every natural disaster possible in the alliance's path; see if they can pick them off as quickly as possible. On the other hand, this is one of the fastest Games I've ever watched- not even three full days have elapsed, and already we're down to four tributes- which has to be some kind of record. Perhaps the Gamemakers will want to space out the deaths from this point forward, just to keep the people of Panem entertained for another week or so. I suppose the moral of the story is to be prepared for anything.

I finally muster enough courage to look over at Peeta. When he sees me looking at him, he glances back- but his face grimaces after a moment and he looks away, trying not to cry. He finally speaks up, but I almost don't recognize his voice- it sounds so strained, out of control.

"Katniss, I know that you had nothing to do what just happened on the TV screen. But- my brother just died. And your sister killed him. And I just don't understand her reasoning. Because down the road he may or may not have wanted to attack someone else in the alliance?! He was a member of the alliance, too- and he risked his life to kill the Careers. So they repay him by killing him, before he even does anything wrong? It's not justified." Anger and resentment flood his voice.

I immediately find myself getting defensive for my sister. "He couldn't be trusted," I shoot back. "I didn't think you trusted him yourself. Did you?"

I'm right- and I think Peeta knows it. But he won't acknowledge it now, not while he's hurting so much. He shakes his head, but not in response to me. "I can't talk about this now- I'm sorry. I can't talk to you. Please- leave me alone for a little while. Promise me. Please."

I'm not used to Peeta shutting me out- and I despise it. "Wait, Peeta-," I begin, desperation in my tone, but Peeta has already turned around and fled the sitting room. A moment later I hear the door to his bedroom slam shut.

I feel such an odd combination of emotions right now. Even though he was my district's tribute, I can't help but feel a strange sense of relief that Paavo is gone. None of the other alliance members- Annella, Jack, or Mouseface- have done anything that has made me remotely question their allegiance to the alliance, to overpowering the Capitol- but Paavo has. And I long feared that Paavo, in his drive to win, would be willing to sacrifice the alliance, and most importantly my sister, in the process. But Prim is safe from Paavo now- they all are. She may not be safe from the Gamemakers, the arena- but I can finally breathe a little easier knowing that the other tributes are no longer a threat to her survival.

Then again, I think of Peeta running away, pulling away from me, and it tears me up inside. I think about what would happen if Paavo had succeeded in killing Prim- if the situation were reversed- and I know in my heart that I wouldn' t be able to keep Peeta close either, if I knew that it was his brother who was the cause of so much suffering. I keep this in mind when I go to my own bedroom, passing Peeta's locked door on the way. I want to pound on his door, tell him that I want to be there for him, like he's always been for me- but I don't.

Instead, after cleaning myself up a bit, I head down to the wagering bar to see Haymitch. Effie has been MIA- but I suppose I shouldn't expect to see her unless I'm willing to suck up to Capitol people just for the sake of being in their company- which I most certainly am not. The wagering bar is definitely more my style. I look around for Haymitch- and realize that he hasn't moved seats or changed position since I saw him last, and hordes of empty shotglasses with a faint green residue litter his end of the bar. I look at the time- 7 a.m. I realize that I haven't seen him in roughly a day and a half- I've been tucked away in my own little world consisting of Peeta, the sitting room, and the arena through the TV screen- and I am suddenly overcome with guilt.

"Well, hello sweetheart," Haymitch slurs to me as I quietly pull up a chair next to him, "Haven't seen you in a while." Clearly he's had some shots of regular alcohol as well.

I flush with embarrassment. "I'm sorry," I say simply. "I've been-,"

"I think I can wager a guess as to what you and your star-crossed lover have been doing, hon," Haymitch replies, giving me a sly glance. "You can spare me the gooey details."

I turn an even deeper crimson. "Look, I'm sorry," I repeat. "That's over anyway, Peeta won't even talk to me now- after what just happened," I glance up at the TV, then back at Haymitch, "and maybe it was a mistake to begin with," I explain. "I should have been here, helping you."

Haymitch's eyebrow raises in surprise when I mention Peeta, but he quickly shifts tone, chuckles, puts his arm around me. "Sweetheart, I've been doing this a long time- longer than you've been alive, in fact. I don't need your help. Especially not the kind where you and lover-boy team up to take down one of Prim's biggest sponsors." He looks at me pointedly, clearly referring to the Armondo debacle.

I feel even sicker- like the wind has just been knocked out of me. "That's exactly what I was most afraid of," I whisper, "making things worse when I was trying my best to help. But I still should have been here- that is still better than sticking my head in the sand." I have never been so ashamed. "Do you need me now? Does Prim?"

Haymitch coughs, clears his throat, pats me on the back. "That was a joke, sweetheart. Don't worry, I would have called you guys if I had really needed you." Haymitch shakes his head. "Look, I know you are better suited to the Games compared to your sister, but Prim came into the Quell with all kinds of advantages over you- four months of training, an alliance. They cleaned up at the Cornucopia. She's only really needed the sponsors once so far. As for here on out, since, er- what just happened a little while ago, Prim's starting to gain some ground with sponsorships. She's a lot stronger than people gave her credit for- what she did to Paavo proved that. But there's still time for things to go awry, I guess."

"So what's going to happen now?" I inquire, with a hint of desperation. I lower my voice. "What's going on with the rebellion?"

Haymitch sighs. The bar is pretty rowdy, giving us some license to speak freely. "That's not as hopeful. Districts 11 and 7 are back under complete Capitol control now. They won't be involved in the arena-break at all. So it looks like only Districts 3, 4, and 8 will be staging it- and that could happen imminently. If they win, they're going to care about rescuing their own tributes- not Prim. But there won't be enough rebel armies to pull it off against one of the Capitol's most guarded fortresses. They're going to lose." He takes a swig of liquor.

"So what's going to happen?" I repeat my question even more anxiously. "Can we participate? We have to get Prim out of there!" I exclaim. I watch Prim on the TV- the cameras are showing Paavo being lifted out of the arena- and can't stand the thought of her trapped in there, regardless of whether she's alone or not.

Haymitch shrugs. "I don't think we should do anything. Like I said, they're going to lose. And when they do, the Capitol is going to want their revenge. They're going to kill the rebels that they catch. It's a death trap." He looks at me seriously. "Besides, given what she's survived so far, Prim has an excellent chance to survive a few more Gamemaker stunts. Jack's injured, Carrie is too timid- but I like Prim's chances. She clearly takes after her sister." He gives me a little wink, and for the moment, he calms me down.

Unfortunately, the calmness lasts about 3.1459 seconds. Because as I'm watching the TV screen, I notice a dense fog quickly overtake the arena, completely obscuring the camera's views of the tributes and leaving nothing but whiteness.