His eyes slowly moved from left to right, his fingers twitched and he groaned lightly; he was fighting through the fog, trying to get back to his safe place when the pain hit him again and he gasped, eyes opening wide and a panicked strangled cry stuck in his throat. He tried to breathe through the onslaught of memories, tried to breathe through the sight of his family lying dead at his feet, he couldn't shake them and he started to shake.

"Why, for the love of god why?" he hissed through the pain barrier as he tried to move.

His body was killing him from the pain and memories of his team mate, his brother, shooting his Ma and brother. He couldn't begin to describe the burning fire in his heart, how he felt sick to his stomach; he didn't want to eat or drink, he definitely didn't want to see anyone. As much as he hated what his family was doing, he didn't want them dead, he knew with Antonio it was probably going to happen, but not his Ma.

He slowly moved his hands over his stomach and side, he felt the padded dressings over his wounds and groaned when he felt the small tube coming out of his ribs; he wanted out of here as soon as possible, he wanted away from the nightmares. His eyes shot open again as the door opened, he looked wildly at the curtains and relaxed slightly as he saw it was a doctor and a nurse team carrying what he assumed was his medications. Both stopped suddenly and smiled gently as they saw he was conscious again.

"Constable, welcome back to the living - how do you feel?" the doctor asked gently.

The nurse was busy checking the monitors and charts and Spike looked directly at the doctor.

"I want out of here, sign me out AMA if necessary, but I want to leave!" Spike said hoarsely.

The doctor looked down at him shocked, he knew with his injuries he was in no condition to move off the bed never mind out of the hospital. He clicked the wild determined look in his patient's eyes and sighed; he had been made aware of the events in the SRU, he had a feeling that he knew where this was going to go.

"I'm sorry Constable but that is against my better judgement, you are nowhere near strong enough to be released into home care and your medical rights were removed when you required extreme measures, Ed Lane and Greg Parker have full authority for your care now," the doctor replied.

Spike tried to sit up and both the nurse and doctor stopped him immediately, his heart rate was still too low for comfort and his lung was barely healing after the 5 days of being unconscious, he needed more time and more care.

"You cannot leave Constable, you have four serious deep stab wounds, one which collapsed your lung and caused you to go into distress in the SRU, your blood loss was severe and it's taken you five days to even wake up." the doctor hissed holding him down.

"I remove their authority, I have no next of kin, both of them are currently lying in the morgue because my so called NOK shot them in the head!" Spike hissed with venom.

The doctor was shocked again, he knew both men well and to hear someone they worked with speak about them with such venom was pretty difficult to hear; he motioned for the nurse to administer the medications, Spike glared at her and slumped back down on the bed.

"Do you see how weak you are, the months of stress and worry, the lack of food and drink has seriously caused some issues in your system but thankfully we can treat them and they will recover in a short time, but you have serious internal damage and if I need to sedate you so you can heal then I will do so, do I make myself clear?"

Spike had guessed by now that they had injected him with a sedative, his vision was blurry and he was feeling warm and relaxed, the last thing he heard was the doctor speaking to the nurse.

"Get Parker and Lane to my office as soon as possible, we have a serious issue."

Blackness claimed him.

Greg and Ed are in the meeting room going over the massive amounts of paperwork required for the internal investigation the SIU is hammering out, they are both exhausted and really can't handle the constant photos from the crime scene the is less than twenty meters from where they are sitting; Ed runs his hands over his face and remembers the moment all too clearly.

Five days ago (Ed's view)

He watched in horror as Spike tried to talk his mother out of shooting him, he looked on in horror as he wasn't wearing his vest, and any shot with the Glock was a lethal one in the hands of someone who is not trained in the weapon. He was tense, muscles taught as an archer's bowstring and he had his eyes on the target; he watched proudly as his buddy talked his own mother down, he didn't know if he'd have the strength to do that after going through what Spike had endured.

Things changed too quickly, Antonio shouted and Spike's mom raised the weapon again with lethal intent.

"Ma don..."

Ingrained into his fingers, when the subject went to red his finger was hitting the trigger.

He watched as the woman fell backwards, a hole above her eye, a grapefruit hole in the back of her skull.

He clenched his eyes shut and snapped back to the present.

Greg wasn't beside him, he looked around and spotted him pacing the open area and he was looking stressed, he picked himself up and headed over to where his boss was talking to someone over the cell phone; he waited until the call finished and looked at Greg.

"What's wrong?" he demanded.

"Spike woke up and demanded to be released AMA, he's demanded to remove us as his NOK and the doctor has had to sedate him."

Ed looked at Greg; he took a deep breath and nodded.

"What does the doctor suggest we do?"

"He is checking legal grounds for the request, since Spike required invasive care, he isn't capable of making his own decisions at the moment, the doctor wants to speak to us, we may need to make a decision based on Spike's mental health.