Part 1
Part 2
Chapter 37 Broken Eggs
By this time, KOS-MOS was able to get out of bed. She walked downstairs to the pope who was silently reading a book in the living room.
"Bored?" asked the woman to the man.
He looked up from his rather intriguing story, "You should be in bed, young lady."
Her eyebrows furrowed at this, "No I shouldn't. Where is Ziggurat? Did you get any word from him?"
"I know only as much as you do, KOS-MOS."
The woman sighed and crossed her arms, "I hate this waiting. We should be doing something to help."
"I don't think we can help. It is well out of our hands, but maybe it is better this way."
"What do you mean?"
"I have no doubt in my mind that we would only serve to get in Ziggurat's way and make this situation even worse."
KOS-MOS looked down at herself as he said this and tapped her foot on the ground twice. "You really believe that? Ziggurat needs all the help he can get—he just doesn't know it. You don't either. What if going after Angela is a trap in itself and Ziggurat fell right for it."
"Well if that was the case, there's nothing we could do for it. If we had come with him, would we have made it less of a trap? Despite my misgivings, I think he made the most logical choice possible. All we can do now is hope everything goes well."
KOS-MOS looked at the pope with an annoyed expression and then shook her head, "Yeah, I'm sure you're right."
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"When is he going to wake up?" asked the anxious Kenshi.
"In a while—four hours to be exact," said the scientist assuredly.
Kenshi looked up in the air in disbelief. He had a long wait in front of him. "That's a long time. Does maintenance usually take that long for him?"
"Why no, of course not. All cyborgs take the same amount of time—although some choose the traditional span of time; eight hours. This situation is much different; typical for a combat cyborg, but still different. There was some brain damage due to an incomplete maintenance process, dysfunction in the joints from some spasm of electricity, and decreased ability of quick reaction from running so long on low energy."
"My, gawd, what has he been doing all this time?" asked a surprised Kenshi looking down at his friend. It was a rhetorical question, but the scientist felt the need to answer.
"Rescuing Captain Angela Wakana; or at least that's what I heard."
Kenshi glanced over at the man, "She must have been in some real trouble."
"It would seem. Excuse me for asking, but are you a cyborg yourself?"
"Yeah. So."
"It's just…most cyborgs don't like to associate themselves with their own kind. It's a fact that cyborgs don't get along with other cyborgs."
"That's a bit stereotypical, you know…but it's true and I hate it. It's like this big competition—survival of the fittest. No one trusts anybody; every man for himself. I wish we could all get along, then our worlds wouldn't seem so gray and lifeless. We already don't have human rights—we can't do things like normal people and other people see fit to dictate our lives—why am I even talking to you. You don't even understand what I'm talking about."
"Oh, but I—
"Shhh. Be quiet. I heard something."
The scientist immediately quieted himself and watched Kenshi silently make his way to the entrance door. He didn't even sense the Black Testament appearing behind him. The scientist let out a yelp and Kenshi quickly turned beholding the intruder.
"It's you again—you leave Ziggurat alone! Your fight is with me."
The Testament grinned, "Alright," said he casually.
Before Kenshi knew it, his hand shot out and grabbed his entire face. Kenshi threw a few hard punches, but it hardly had any effect. Suddenly, the Testament thrust him with malicious force into the door behind them. He continued to bash his head over and over again with increasing glee. No matter how hard he tried, Kenshi would not yell out in pain. There were a few grunts and groans, but that was it. As Kenshi's life grew closer and closer to its end, he began to grope around with his hands at the air. To the Testaments surprise, he found the Testament's neck. As soon as the cyborg found his grip, he was hell-bent on squeezing it to death. The Testament continued to hammer him with even more eagerness. Kenshi growled at the dark from and sent a spark of energy down his arm and into the assailant. The Testament's assault quickly began to slow. He glared at Kenshi angrily.
"So you think you can stop me, huh?" asked the Testament.
Kenshi wasn't able to say anything. His concentration was on healing himself. A white glittering light began to surround him while his hands still grasp the Testament.
"Die already!"
With one final thrust, he smashed the cyborg's head through the door. He pulled him back out to see if he was dead. Kenshi's body had become limp. The Testament grinned at his victory and threw the corpse to the side. The Testament turned to his next victim; the scientist who cowered in the corner. The scientist was by far easier to kill than the annoying cyborg; he didn't put up a fight in the least. Voyager walked regally towards the other cyborg, Ziggurat, and looked down at him with interest.
"You should have died years ago, imbecile, but you continue to deny your fate. What makes you so special? Why does Wilhelm spend so much time and energy making your life a living hell? Why not do away with you like the rest of the nuisances? There's still one more person I have to kill, Captain—someone who I'm sure would push you over the edge once you see the corpse. It's like history repeating itself ay, Captain. You still haven't learned. You can't put all your eggs in one carton. What happens when all the eggs break—you won't have anything left."
With that, Voyager twirled away from his once-Captain and disappeared from sight. Ziggurat may have been in a coma, but he heard everything that was said. However, he could do nothing about it.
The glistening light was dim, but it was still there. He too had listened to the Testament's speech. Kenshi began to crawl over to the helpless cyborg with waning strength. He grabbed on to the armrest of the maintenance seat and painstakingly pulled himself up to the cyborg's level. He reached out to grab on of Ziggurat's hands and began to let his healing power flow into him. The last of his strength was put into it.
"Zig-gur-at, you…have to…fight. Fight. Re-act-ivate…yourself. Do it now…as I heal you."
Kenshi felt the other hand make a slight movement. There was hope in his eyes. Unfortunately, Kenshi's strength was spent and he fell unpleasantly to the hard ground before he could see Ziggurat fully awaken.
"Kenshi…?" asked a dazed Ziggurat.
His head was spinning uncontrollably and he wondered if all he had heard was a dream or indeed reality. The first thing he did was look over the side of the chair. Kenshi seemed impossibly damaged to the point that you could no longer tell who it was, but the clothes gave him away.
"Kenshi! No Kenshi…"
Ziggurat had to stand up first to actually get to the other cyborg. As he did so, another wave of nausea overtook him and he stumbled. He was glad when he bent down to his knees to get a better look at Kenshi. Again he did not look at his face. This time it was easier because Kenshi's indescribably scarred face was turned to the ground. Ziggurat instinctively took the other's hand into his.
"Thank you, Kenshi. You were a true friend. If I ever meet another cyborg, I'd want him to be just like you."
Ziggurat did not cry—it was impossible to do so and besides that, he knew that it would only hinder him from his real task to save KOS-MOS. When Ziggurat stood again, he only briefly noted the dead scientist. Blood seemed to decorate the walls and floor. The cyborg opened the damaged door and stepped into the crisp morning air. A sense of déjà vu came over him as his feet made harsh noises with the concrete sidewalk.
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"Are you sure we should be doing this?" asked Lang to Chloe worriedly.
"We've already skipped school, Lang, so we have to go through with it."
"Hey! What are you guys doing out her skippin?"
The two kids nearly jumped out of their socks when they heard the intruding voice.
"Oh, it's you!" said the two in chorus.
"That's right. And I'd like to know what you guys are doing."
"Leah, we're going to look for Kenshi—we never saw him this morning so he couldn't drive us to school like usual. I think something bad happened…" said Chloe.
Leah crossed her arms thoughtfully, "Him too? Ziggy didn't show up either."
They all looked at each other as they both realized that they were in the same situation.
"That's it; I'm coming with you two. Where are you guys going to look first?"
The two looked at each other, but Chloe spoke up, "Our house. Maybe he came back by now."
"Your house? That's a long walk. Mine's a lot closer. Let's try there first. They might've met up with each other there."
The two realized that this was a better plan and commenced to following Leah. Along the way, they talked and joked about all the things the two cyborgs could be doing together and by the time they arrived at Leah's house, the possibilities were growing quite ridiculous. Leah told them so, claiming that they'd never catch Ziggurat doing anything remotely fun or stupid. However, the way Leah had described the blond cyborg; he was supposed to be immensely fun to be around. Leah took the house key from around her neck to open the door. Chloe and Lang followed close behind; they had never been inside the enormous house.
While Chloe and Lang looked around the house curiously, Leah looked in the usual places for Ziggurat.
"Look at this, Leah," said a mystified Lang.
He held up a small stack of notebook paper. Chloe came over to him first with interest.
"What is it?" asked Chloe.
"Just read it."
Chloe looked down at the neat incursive writing and started reading it aloud:
"Such a strange occurrence happened to me that sometimes I wish to forget of it, but as I hold this babe in my arms, I am reminded…Having to withhold such events proves even hard for me. Even for a cyborg. So I write in hopes of relieving my pains my feeling, but never truly doing so…"
By this time, Leah had walked through the doorway to the living room where they were.
"He had just finished his latest assignment. As suicidal as it had seemed, he had survived another day. With a crack of his knuckles and his neck he seemed prepared for anything. He stood at attention as a woman he had come to know as "Boss woman" came to his presence.
She smiled at him stiffly in her orderly demeanor.
"You seem to have a knack for the impossible, Ziggurat 8."
He stared at her with emotionless eyes that matched hers. He knew that she cared little about him.
"It's about Ziggy," said Lang in conclusion as Chloe read this.
"Let me see it," said Leah as everything suddenly registered.
Chloe gave her the small stack of paper.
"This is his handwriting. I mean, this is some kind of…biography, but he's always referring to himself in third person besides the italicized sentences at the beginning of the first few chapters," said Leah hurriedly and excitingly analyzing it, "I bet…I bet I'd find out a lot about him if I read this…and about that KOS-MOS woman…"
Chloe and Lang looked at each other again; Leah seemed to have all the answers. Then suddenly, the papers fell from her hands as some mysterious pain began attacking her. Leach clutched her stomach as she fell to her knees.
"Leah, what's wrong! What's happening!" cried Chloe full of genuine concern.
"I…don't…know," growled Leah struggling with words.
Chloe bent down with Leah and put her arms around her, "If only Kenshi was here, he'd heal you in no time. Do you have any pills here that I can give you?"
Leah gave her a barely perceptible nod.
"Okay. Where?"
"T-the…cabinet." Leah breathed in sharply as the pain became unbearable.
Chloe's eyebrows furrowed, "Which one? There's so many around here."
Leah finally collapsed from the effort.
"Lang, quick; look through the cabinets for some pills. Motrin…Aleve, anything with Ibuprofen in it."
Lang nodded and looked for a bathroom to begin his search.
"Oh, Kenshi, where are you when we need you…"
Chloe took Leah by her hands and dragged her to the nearby couch. Their plan of skipping school was slowly crumbling. She felt somehow responsible for the string of events that had just occurred. Chloe bent down and gathered the conveniently numbered papers. Maybe these papers held some valuable information that could help them find the cyborgs.
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The world was spinning around him and his senses were dulled. Voices swarmed in his head repeating and echoing. He could barely understand anything that was happening around him as he dragged his feet. In fact, he almost forgot where he was going. Eventually, he found that he was lost. He knew then that this had been an extremely bad idea. One time he had ran into a man. The cyborg had gotten yelled at for his clumsiness, but he wasn't sure if he had stopped to listen or even apologize to the man. Ziggurat looked up to blurry road signs. For a moment, he couldn't read them. He had to waste precious minutes deciphering the street name. When he finally did this, he realized that he was approximately three blocks off from his destination. A metal hand reached out to the wall to lean on it. By now, Ziggurat was sure that he had gathered a lot of attention. How many times did one get to witness a seemingly drunken cyborg?
Ziggurat pushed off again, but he simply couldn't keep himself walking in a straight line. People noticed this and made sure to keep out of his way. He almost found himself colliding with a fire hydrant. Only luck kept him from falling flat on his face. He stopped for a moment to get his bearings and then continued. Ziggurat proceeded in this way until he believed he saw the Pope's small house. He slumped forward a little as there was nothing else to lean on. The ground was very unbalanced so his pace slowed even more. It took him an eternity to reach the door which he knocked on with uneven intensity.
"Pope Sergius…KOS-MOS," called Ziggurat in baritone with a bit of slur as if he was partially drunk.
The door opened immediately when they knew who it was. Once again, it was the pope who greeted him at the door. Ziggurat refrained from falling on him when he opened the door so suddenly.
"Oh my, gawd, Ziggurat, you look terrible."
"Do I?"
As soon as he stepped in, another wave of nausea swept over him. The environment had changed from the outdoors to the indoors and his senses had to familiarize itself with the new settings. He waited for his vision to clear a little more as he noticed a woman rushing down the hallway. It was exactly who he though it would be.
"KOS-MOS? Are you safe? Was there anyone else here besides myself and the pope?"
"Don't you worry about me, Ziggurat. I'm fine. The real question is: are you alright? You look rather dizzy."
Ziggurat continued to stare at the beauty before him. There was a bandage on her face. What had made him do such a cruel thing? A strange thing happened at that moment as his eyes swept over her. Perhaps it was his disheveled mind, but for once in a long while, he saw her in all her glory. He wondered how it was possible to be so cold to such a warm person. He wondered how he could look at such a woman with cold eyes.
"Is there something wrong?" asked KOS-MOS noticing his stare.
"Has anyone ever told you how magnificent you are?"
"Ziggurat, you're tired and—
"No, I'm fine," lied Ziggurat, "I'm fine. Better than ever."
"Better than ever?" KOS-MOS repeated. She knew that he wasn't himself then; he just didn't use those kinds of phrases.
"It's just…when I looked at you, I couldn't believe that it was actually you. Maybe I got here before Voyager. Maybe this isn't reality and you're just made up."
"I'm here. I'm as real as you, Ziggurat. Tell me what's wrong. What's Voyager up to?"
"You should be dead yet you live I didn't expect it to be…it's more like a dream. You're real, though…at least you say you are."
"Ziggurat, please, come sit down. Explain to me what's happening."
"No, I don't need to sit. You don't either."
"Then what?"
Ziggurat looked confused for a moment, suddenly at a loss of words.
"Ziggurat, your nose is bleeding. Let me get a napkin."
"No don't, please. There's something I wanted to do before…I never see you again. Before you forget about me forever."
"Pope Sergius, tell him he needs to sit and rest. I'm not sure what's wrong with him."
"You stay out of this, Sergius. This doesn't concern you," said Ziggurat with surprising speed and vehemence.
With this request, the pope was never given any time for his input. KOS-MOS was startled by this. She started to move towards him to put her arms around him and comfort him. He did not resist her touch.
"KOS-MOS, there's something I wanted to do," said Ziggurat softly.
"What is it? What is all this about me forgetting you?"
"You will forget me, KOS-MOS. Everything else now is muddled. I can barely decipher anything right now. But I know—I just know that all that we've been through will be nothing more than a fantasy. I'm afraid that I've…lost. I know that there's something important that I have to tell you. Voyager. It's about him. Even if it did somehow come back to me…the outcome is clear."
"Ziggurat…I don't have anything to worry about. You're here. You'll keep me safe."
"I wish…I only wish that were true. I'd die for you, you know. I'd let him do what he pleases to me if only he'd leave you alone. I'd let him torture me…ruin me over and over again to his heart's content if only…" He looked up at the woman with sullen eyes and then his eyes dropped down to her lips, "Will you let me…kiss you…one last time, KOS-MOS?"
"Ziggurat, I thought you'd never ask."
She smiled at him with her luscious lips and together they moved in until their lips were locked on each other. KOS-MOS was thoroughly excited and Ziggurat couldn't wish to be in a happier place. Their spirits were so high that the cyborg could scarcely believe it. He began to feel a warm liquid crawl down his stomach though it was slight. Ziggurat wanted to ignore it, but more of it began to fall and slowly dampen the fabric of his clothes. He hardly believed that he could be sweating this profusely.
"KOS-MOS…" managed Ziggurat in between mouthfuls a bit embarrassed with himself.
He began to feel her intensity slacken and her head began to drop as if all the energy had been soaked out of her. Was she this tired? The warm liquid did not slacken; it began to creep onto the metal.
"KOS-MOS, speak to me. Lie down. Rest if you must."
Her arms were still clasped around him and his arms around her.
"Zig-gur-at…I'm so…tired," said a weak tender voice of KOS-MOS.
"Then rest…"
"Alright."
He looked at her blue eyes as they finally began to close. All his concentration was on her. Her clasp began to weaken and her head lay lazily on his shoulders. Her legs wouldn't support her. The liquid made its way down his metal legs. His arms moved up on her back as he tired to lift her, but it had all suddenly become slippery. A look of horror crossed his face.
"KOS-MOS, KOS-MOS, please wake up! Wake up!"
There was no response.
Wake up! Do you hear me?" His voice was loud and frantic yet unsteady from so much emotion.
He couldn't cry, he was a cyborg, but it was as if he did so as he fell to his knees and his face became cringed with immense sorrow and pain. His hands ran over the entirety of her back and his hand became completely covered in the cooling soon to be sticky liquid. She was dead.
"How…? Why…? …Pope Sergius. Sergius answer me."
The cyborg turned his head around as he still held the corpse. And yet another lifeless body found his eyes…or body parts. Quietly and smoothly the Black Testament had moved in for the kill. He had been waiting on Ziggurat so that he could make his move. He had neatly mutilated the old man's body into thousand's pieces without the pope letting out as much as a scream. Only his head was recognizable. His eyes seemed to stare at him with an eternally shocked expression. What had he been shocked at? The brutality of Voyager's act or the love that Ziggurat and KOS-MOS held for each other?
Ziggurat reached over with wet, shaky hands and closed his eyes as gently as he could muster at that moment. He was trembling all over and weak from the sight of so much bloodshed…even for him. KOS-MOS silently slipped from his grasp and laid gently onto the ground. There was a deep puncture would through her back. Voyager had keenly struck her with a sharp, piercing object and avoided Ziggurat completely. He had done so on purpose so that she would die in his arms. The message was suddenly crystal clear to the cyborg. The Testament wanted to announce just how powerless he was to the whims of fate or more specifically Wilhelm.
At first he was shaky, but it had slowly turned to stiffness. He couldn't leap or run; he had to walk slowly out of the house. It was all his energy would permit. Immensely sluggish, his feet crushed down on shards of bone, mounds of flesh and skin, and slithers of brain until he was out in the fresh air again. He felt so cold and alone that his mind seemed eerily devoid of thought. One name suddenly came to mind: Leah. A sense of direction came back to his eyes. Ziggurat was no longer thinking, simply doing.
The attention on the cyborg grew as they looked upon all the blood that covered him. He looked deadly and sickening and people made sure to stay out of his way wherever he was going. It seemed as if he had murdered someone, but no one would even think to call the police until much later when the shock passed.
Angela's house was a long way off. It took him hours to get there on foot. Those hours seemed to slip past Ziggurat and in his mind he was there in a few moments. The cyborg didn't think to knock on the door. Instead his metal hand turned the locked doorknob until it opened by force. He hardly realized that he had done this when he stepped in. Once again the same annoying nausea came over him.
"Z-ziggy! It's you! We were just looking for you," exclaimed Chloe.
Chloe did not receive an immediate response; he was still trying to catch his bearings. This gave the girl some time to really look at the cyborg. She grimaced at the sight of all the dried blood and began to step back from him in her newfound fear. Was this the Ziggy from before? Why was he acting so strangely?
"Little girl, where is Leah? Is she well?" asked Ziggurat. He could not think of the girl's name at that moment. Kenshi had told him before, but that time seemed so far off.
Chloe sensed the concern in his voice. She stopped and answered despite her fear, "No, she's not. She's on the couch. I gave her some Motrin."
"What? No…this can't be…" His voice wasn't as steady as it used to be.
"I don't know what happened. There was this pain that came out of nowhere and then I had to treat her quickly, but I'm sure she'll be fine. She's resting."
"Let me see her…" said Ziggurat though he did not wait to be guided there.
Chloe moved aside instinctively as he made his way into the living room. She wasn't sure how he had figured that she was there. Chloe's words were true as he saw her sound asleep on the couch. He took her pulse and temperature. She was fine for now.
"Ziggy…what happened to you? Where's Kenshi?"
"Kenshi is dead along with Sergius and KOS-MOS. They're all gone."
Chloe was shocked by his bluntness. The way Leah had talked about him; she thought he'd be nicer. Lang was in the living room too, but the timid boy was hiding behind the couch. The boy was utterly frightened of the combat cyborg and he didn't want to be anywhere near him.
"A-are you sure?" asked Chloe.
"Very."
"Then that's his blood on you?"
Ziggurat shook his head, "His death might've been painful, but not so messy as Sergius and KOS-MOS. This blood that you see is hers—KOS-MOS. She died in my arms. Blood seeped from a flesh wound—it took me awhile to even notice it. I wasn't thinking right. Just like now…"
Suddenly Chloe understood what was happening or at least a gist of it, "You need maintenance, don't you? But somehow you weren't able to do it."
"Yes, that's what happened. I couldn't finish it because the scientist was done away with. It was all Kenshi could do to save me. I guess he healed me to some extent and I went to the other two: Pope Sergius and KOS-MOS."
Chloe suddenly looked saddened, "So Kenshi won't be coming home? I won't ever see him again?"
Ziggurat shook his head no, "I'm truly sorry."
"But, Ziggy, there's something I never got to tell him."
"What was it?" asked a mildly interested Ziggurat.
"That I…loved him. He did so much for my brother and I. Mom wouldn't do half as much. He deserved to be honored, but I never once thanked him."
"I'm sure he knew."
"It's really sad how cyborgs are dying or becoming replaced by inhuman realians. To hell with realians! They can't replace Kenshi…they can't replace you…" Chloe was already beginning to cry. The shock of Kenshi's death was intense. She knew that Lang too was shedding quiet tears.
Chloe looked up at Ziggurat who simply stared at the resting Leah.
"Kenshi was set free, little girl. When you live a life that never ends, one day you'll get tired of it. Kenshi, I can tell that he was one of the few people who truly enjoyed life. He wasn't bored with it at all—that was what made him so special. He wanted me as a friend even. I envy that, you know. I wish life didn't seem so grim and gray to me. Maybe I've seen too much of it."
Ziggurat moved towards the couch when suddenly the hairs on the back of his neck stood up.
"Voyager…"
"You're getting better at this," confirmed the Black Testament.
"You've come to kill her."
"No, that would be too easy. I can, of course, if I choose, but instead I'll give you an ultimatum."
"I'm listening."
"You forget that Leah ever existed and you kill these two snot-nosed kids. Show me how much you want her to live."
"I-I can't do that."
"One would think after the deaths of all the people close to you, you'd be desperate for your daughter's survival. Is there anything that might move you? Would you rather that I woke her and tortured her right before your eyes? Would that push you over the edge?"
Ziggurat wasn't sure if he should respond to it or not. His mind was swirling with silly ideas of how to improve the situation. What would he do?
"There's no way he'll ever do what you say, mister!" proclaimed Chloe, "He can take you. How dare you come in this house uninvited."
The Black Testament laughed, "So naïve, Chloe. But you don't know anything about him. In fact, you should be scared. Look at him, he's thinking about it."
Chloe looked over at Ziggurat. They met gazes and a sudden fear struck the girl.
"There's just no way. Cyborgs don't do things like that."
She watched him raise his arm.
"Wilhelm said you were special. Now I see why. You'd make a perfect Testament."
"No, Ziggy! This isn't you. You don't do things like this."
Lang finally built up the courage to make himself seen when he heard his only sister in dire trouble.
"No! Don't do it!" cried a shrill voice.
The young boy was hardly thinking and he tried to tackle the cyborg. He was little more than a nuisance. Everything became quiet when he heard two shots from a gun. Lang began to sob uncontrollably when he turned to him. The boy took a chance and looked up to the cyborg. The cyborg's eyes were so eerily blank. He was no longer thinking simply doing. Leah chose this time to awaken just as Ziggurat aimed his gun at the boy and shot him in cold blood.
There was an ominous silence. Ziggurat didn't notice the awakened Leah.
"Oh, my, God. This…can't…be…"
His arm lowered and his eyes looked over at her.
"Well done, Ziggurat," said the Black Testament smugly as he turned around.
Before anyone could say a word to the Testament, he vanished.
"Z-ziggy…what did you do?"
"I…saved you."
Leah was at a loss of words as he too began to walk away from her. He couldn't bear to look at her eyes.
"Ziggy…" sobbed Leah, "Ziggy, where are you going?"
The only response he got from the exhausted cyborg was the sound of a door closing.
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AN: Finally, we've reached the last chapter of Part 2. Remember I said there's going to be three parts? Don't worry there'll still be three parts…only this last part will be significantly shorter than the other two…hopefully. I'm shooting for two-three more chapters. I'm trying to get it finished before September 4 before school starts. Let's hope I can….
Told ya there was going to be another kiss. That's what took me so long to update; I was trying to figure out how I would put it in(not to mention how long this chapter is...). I'm not sure if anyone noticed, but the pope and KOS-MOS never found out about Angela. Lang and Chloe found out that Leah was Ziggy's daughter from a convenient slip from the Testament…however, they took that little secret to their graves. (That Black Testament is starting to get on my nerves….I mean, I'm trying to stay true to the game, but somehow Ziggy's gotta get him back….)