Chapter THIRTY SEVEN

Sakura did not see much of Shikamaru for the rest of the day. Once, a long time ago, the boy had explained to her after they had witnessed his parents arguing that giving the other person space was a way to allow both parties to cool down. Sakura wondered if this was what he was trying to do, and a part of her was glad, because every time she thought of him, his last question lingered in her mind; how much worse would it be if she saw his face?

So? she heard, which one do you want?

Sakura had always known to an extent, at least subconsciously and now certainly, that the world she had been seeing and the world she could now see could not coexist. She currently stood in front of two windows showing her two very different views of the same scenery, and she could only slip through one, and once she chose, she could not change her mind.

In one world, everything would be as it was. Her fellow villagers would be footholds towards sacrifices for Jashin and her enemies would be nameless lumps of bones, flesh, blood and screams that she would use to show her God just how much he meant to her.

The other would be something completely different. Her teammates could maybe be friends and the people around her acquaintances, and her enemies would be sacrifices for not her God, but for something she could build herself. She could fill herself with something else, Haku had said so.

Did she want to, though?

Haku had truly been stupid and selfish. He had dug a deep hole of doubt within her heart, and he had somehow found a way for her to make the hole bigger on her own. He had blurred the line of what was choice and what was maybe not, and then he had left her to try and salvage what she had believed her whole life.

Suddenly, a gripping pain erupted from deep within her chest. Sakura gasped and a hand flew up to grasp her shirt where her heart would be and took a few shuddering breaths.

Sakura liked pain. Pain was a sensation given to mankind by the Gods, given to her by Jashin. It was a raw, unmistakable sensation that connected her to him.

However, this pain was different; it was almost like a reminder.

Her knees gave way and Sakura collapsed. She hit the ground hard and she instinctively curled in on herself. With her ear against the wooden floor, she could hear a set of footsteps hurrying closer and closer. The door to the room was thrown open and someone called out her name.

Shikamaru, she recognized.

Her world went black.

"It's almost like her body is acting against her," the doctor told him. "We cannot find what exactly is causing it."

"Is it a chakra condition?" Yukari asked; when Sakura had collapsed, Shikamaru had gone straight to his mother, because his father was out, and the woman had wasted no time in bringing the girl to the hospital.

"We will have to run more checks to make sure."

Shikamaru watched the staff leave the room to give them more space, before he lowered his gaze to look at Sakura. Unconscious, she lacked the mocking sneer that had almost been a permanent look on her face, and she almost looked peaceful. He ran a hand through his hair, thinking. He might be no doctor, but he was a Nara, and he had a few ideas.

The body of a Jashinist was a medium of connection between them and their God, and Sakura was beginning to doubt the part of herself that had been dedicated to her belief for so long.

Maybe the Jashinist part of her was rebelling against her newfound conscience?

He felt a surge of guilt at that thought, but he pushed it down.

In the end, he would just have to help her fight it.

Sakura woke up to the sound of loud voices and she inwardly sighed when she recognized Naruto and Sasuke fighting over what kind of food would be best for her.

"Personally, I'd like some dango," she said. "You know, in case someone wants to know what I want."

Both boys stopped talking at her interruption. "Sakura-chan!" Naruto exclaimed, and he darted over to crouch beside her bed. "You're awake! How are you feeling?"

Sakura glanced around, recognizing her surroundings to be a hospital room. She wondered why no one had come in to scold her teammates for being noisy. "I guess I am," she said.

"What happened?" Sasuke demanded, moving to stand next to the blond. "The doctors didn't tell us much and Nara fell asleep halfway through our talk."

Sakura snorted and slowly sat up. Her body was still sore, something she wasn't used to waking up to, but she managed to draw herself up into a comfortable position. "If the doctors can't tell you what's wrong with me, how do you expect me to know?"

"There's something wrong with you?" Naruto asked, worry filling his gaze. "When will you get better?"

Sakura shrugged, frowning. "Why? Is there something going on?"

Naruto opened his mouth, but Kakashi, who had been leaning quietly against the wall beside the window, stepped up to her side. "The Chunin exams are being held in Konoha," he explained. "Are you up for it?"

Sakura dug through her mind, trying to remember what Shikamaru had told her about it before. She couldn't recall much, but she remembered enough.

"Of course," she said firmly.

If she passed, she would receive more missions outside the walls. That meant more fights. She could hardly wait.

Update, friends!

Darque: Stuff happened. First, I uploaded the first chapter of my original story on wattpad. The link, and details, are on our profile. Second, I created a tumblr, and the link is also on our profile.

Raven: We'll be uploading our stories onto there, too, though that might take some time.

Darque: I might also post other stuff, mostly stupid stuff, but if you feel like it, please do check it out.

Raven: Yeah.

Darque: Also, CHUNINEXAMSKAYBAI~

Raven: I.I

Read and Review~