It had been three days since Jemma and Fitz last spoke.
She was sat on a stool in a rehearsal room, a band of people around her, ready to help her try out a new musical arrangement for her final exam piece.
"Let's um, let's do a different song just to warm up. I've been practicing this a lot." Jemma said, handing some sheet music to a guitar player, who inspected it and nodded apprehensively; he could see the pain in Jemma's eyes and the remains of her dried tears on her cheeks.
"Okay, whenever you're ready." Jemma sniffed, returning to her stool. After a few moments and a deep breath from Jemma, she gave a false smile as the guitar player started to play. At the right moment, Jemma began to sing, her mind on only one thing. Him.
"Summer after high school when we first met
We'd make out in your mustang to Radiohead
And on my eighteenth birthday, we got matching tattoos
Used to steal your parents' liquor and climb to the roof
Talk about our future like we had a clue
Never planned that one day I'd be losing you
In another life I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world
In another life I would make you stay
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away
The one that got away
I was June and you were my Johnny Cash
Never one without the other, we made a pact
Sometimes when I miss you, I put those records on
Someone said you had your tattoo removed
Saw you downtown singing the Blues
It's time to face the music, I'm no longer your muse
But in another life I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world
In another life I would make you stay
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away
The one that got away
All this money can't buy me a time machine
Can't replace you with a million rings
I should have told you what you meant to me
'Cause now I pay the price
In another life I would be your girl
We'd keep all our promises, be us against the world
In another life I would make you stay
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away
The one that got away
The one
In another life I would make you stay
So I don't have to say you were the one that got away
The one that got away."
The song ended as a tear fell down Jemma's cheek, and she felt a surge of fresh tears approaching.
"Excuse me." She mustered politely before getting up and rushing out of the room.
…
Fitz sat in silence next to Callum's tree, the gentle breeze causing a loose branch to occasionally brush his shoulder. He stared into space, not even knowing what time it was. It had been so long since he'd gone this long without talking to Jemma. She'd been staying in Skye's room for the last few nights; he'd only seen her in Mrs Byron's lessons and even then they never exchanged a word. Ever since the night she told him about Mr Gonzales' offer things had never been the same; all of their plans had been changed. She had yet to accept or deny the offer, as far as he knew, and while he wanted her to accept and spend a year living the dream, it would mean he'd lose her, possibly forever. What if she met someone else out there? What if, after the year, she decided she didn't want to get back together? Fitz didn't even know if they were broken up. He never thought they'd go back to the time they stopped speaking.
Deep in thought, Fitz didn't even register Grant walking up to him and sitting down beside him.
"You okay, buddy?" Grant asked. Fitz slowly turned to acknowledge his presence, his face expressionless.
"I have no idea."
"…Are you to broken up or…?"
"…I have no idea."
"Well, how are you gonna sort this out?"
"…I have no idea."
Grant placed a supportive hand on Fitz's shoulder for a brief moment before looking around the campus, taking it all in for what could easily be the final time.
"Did I ever tell you about when I saw Skye for the first time?" Grant asked.
"Look Grant, I know you mean well but I'm not in the mood for-"
"-Just, let me speak, okay?" Grant asked. Fitz reluctantly nodded.
"…I'll never forget it. Our first day. I was going around inviting all the first years to the party in the common room and then I walked into room 32. There she was. I just saw these big brown eyes and that was it, I was hooked. There was just something about her. A warmth, a glow. Jemma was there too, but I couldn't take my eyes off of this gorgeous girl in front of me. I fell in love with her the moment she told me her name. That was a long wait, those two years wondering if we'd ever get together, if I'd ever find the courage to admit how I felt, but man was it worth it." Grant explained, turning to Fitz.
"Was that how it was when you saw Jemma for the first time?" Grant added.
"I guess so. Just took me a while to realise it. I mean, I knew from the start how beautiful she is, I just…I can't talk about this, it makes me sad. I can't talk like everything's okay. I've finally got so many people in my life to care about again and in a few weeks I could end up just like I did after Jamie died." Fitz said, tears threatening to burst out of his eyes.
"Do you love Jemma?" Grant asked.
"What kind of stupid question is that? Of course I do!" Fitz said passionately.
"And you know Jemma loves you. Just as much, if not more."
"That's not possible, Grant."
"Okay, fine. The point is you two love each other, that's not a bond easily broken. If you're meant to be together, you'll be together. A year apart, ten years apart, who cares? She saw you at your lowest point and she still fell in love with you. Nothing can change that, Fitz, nothing. You are linked for life. If anything, a year apart might make your love even stronger in the long run. That's even if she decides to go at all." Grant said.
"But she SHOULD go, it would be her dream come true!" Fitz protested.
"Maybe it is."
"What do you mean?"
"I think all of this, this huge decision she has to make, might have put things in perspective. Maybe she has a new dream; being with you. Maybe you two haven't spoken in days not because you're afraid she'll end things, but because she's afraid you'll tell her to go." Grant said.
"…What do I do?" Fitz asked desperately.
"What you've always done. Be Fitzsimmons. Talk to her. Set things straight. Save the world." Grant smiled. Fitz looked at Callum's tree as he digested Grant's words, knowing he'd give exactly the same advice.
…
Fitz and Grant headed to Skye's room and opened the door gently, where Jemma and Skye were sat talking lightly on Skye's bed, not even realising the boys were there. Skye had a CD player set up nearby and pressed play.
"So, you're the first one to hear the final version of my exam song." Skye said as the music began. Jemma smiled slightly as she closed her eyes to listen to her friend as she began to sing. Fitz and Grant listened too.
"So far away
Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore?
It would be so fine to see your face at my door
Doesn't help to know you're just time away
Long ago I reached for you and there you stood
Holding you again could only do me good
How I wish I could but you're so far away
One more song about moving along the highway
Can't say much of anything that's new
If I could only work this life out my way
I'd rather spend it being close to you."
The words of the song resonated deeply with everyone in the room.
But you're so far away
Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore?
It would be so fine to see your face at my door
Doesn't help to know you're so far away
Travelling around sure gets me down and lonely
Nothing else to do but close my mind
I sure hope the road don't come to own me
There's so many dreams I've yet to find
But you're so far away
Doesn't anybody stay in one place anymore?
It would be so fine to see your face at my door
Doesn't help to know you're so far away
Yeah, you're so far away
Ooh, yeah
You're so far."
The song ended and Jemma clapped as Skye smiled.
"That was amazing!" Jemma said happily.
"I agree." Fitz said delicately, causing Jemma and Skye to turn and face the boys stood at the door. Fitz looked at Jemma and smiled.
"Hi." He whispered.
"Hi." She replied quietly.
"Babe, how about we get some food at the café?" Grant suggested.
"Good idea. Not like it's my room or anything." Skye said as she stood up and walked out with Grant, tapping Fitz on the back as she went.
"Babe?" Skye asked as they walked down the corridor.
"I was trying it out. You and pet names just don't go." Grant admitted.
"So painfully true." Skye agreed.
Now alone, Fitz shut the door and sat on the empty bed next to the one Jemma was sat on.
"…I'm sorry I haven't spoken to you since…everything." Jemma said.
"No, it's okay. I'm sorry." Fitz said.
"I'm just…I'm confused. I don't know what to do." Jemma admitted, putting her head in her hands. Fitz sighed and took a moment to think for himself before getting up, sitting next to Jemma and taking her hand in his, a feeling both of them had missed tremendously.
"Grant was telling me about when he first met Skye, and I got to thinking about the day we met. It was like you were my calling. Like I'd been searching for something my whole life without even realising it but I found it in you. You're my essence, Jemma. The only light in the darkness. I carry you with me wherever I go, so we'll never be alone. We were always going to be apart for the next year, even the next few years." Fitz said.
"I know, but if I do this I'd get about ten minutes with you a week. That's not fair on either of us." Jemma said.
"Jemma, this would be your dream come true. I love you too much to tell you not to take it. I'll let you go so you can be a star without me. That's how much I love you." Fitz said.
"…Sitting here, looking into your eyes, holding your hand…this, right now, this is a dream come true. All those stories I read when I was little, finding your true love…that was my first dream, the dream that meant the most, and it came true. You've made all my dreams come true, Leopold Fitz. I…I can't be apart from you for a year, not in the way Gonzales wants me to be. I love you too much to let you break your heart. How do they know it'll be the only chance I get? I'd rather never make it big but have you by my side than make it big without you there." Jemma said, tears rolling down her face and a smile slowly forming. Fitz was near tears himself.
"Are…are you sure?"
"Of course I am. I love you, and I'm never going to leave you, not like that. I can dream of being a big star and having the glitz and glamour, but I could never dream of not having you around." Jemma said.
"I love you so much." Fitz said, kissing Jemma passionately and hugging her tight. Suddenly, an idea popped into his head.
"What appealed to you most about Gonzales' offer?" Fitz asked.
"…Seeing the world." Jemma said.
"Then let's see the world."
"I don't understand, Leo."
"Let's travel the world. You and me. We could go anywhere and everywhere. The big cities, all the landmarks, do it all. Leo and Jemma seeing the world together. What do you think?" Fitz suggested.
"That sounds…incredible. But we have university! We couldn't go everywhere I'd want to in one summer." Jemma said.
"You would have deferred your place for a year anyway…how about we both do that?" Fitz said. Jemma's face lit up.
"YES, YES, YES, YES!" Jemma said excitedly, hugging Fitz again. It was a rapid and dramatic change of plan for them both, but it was exactly what they wanted and, more importantly, needed. University could wait for a year; Leo Fitz and Jemma Simmons had to take the world by storm first, and do it together. Just as it should be.
"This is mad! You really want to do this?" Fitz asked.
"I really do. A year seeing places I may never get the chance to again, with you? THAT would be a dream come true. Let's do it. Screw the future." Jemma beamed.
"Screw the future." Fitz agreed, kissing Jemma again, a smile very much on his face.
"I love you." Jemma whispered as she rested her head on Fitz's shoulder. Fitz wrapped an arm around her, resting his head on top of hers.
"I love you too."
"And Fitz?"
"Yeah?"
"…You're my only light in the darkness too."
…
A/N: Only 5 chapters left! Thank you so much for all the amazing things you've said, and I hope you enjoy the rest of the journey.