A/N: Requested by thordisx.

Bucky and Jane arrived at the cemetery to find Darcy and Steve waiting for them. Darcy had a little altar set up with candles and crosses and a thick leather book laid out and open to a seemingly random page. Steve, meanwhile, shuffled his feet behind a tree and in general looked like he'd rather be anywhere else but here. Bucky could relate. Oh boy, could he ever.

He'd been in bed with jane when that idiot Lewis started calling their cell phones incessantly. He'd just gotten her out of her bra and he was feasting on her perfect breasts, making her beg for it... and then little miss 'I'm Stupid And Annoying But I'm Also Pretty And Quirky So It's Okay' had to go and do whatever it was she'd done this time to screw things up for them.

"I'm really sorry about this," she said, running to meet them. "Believe me, I wouldn't have called if it wasn't an emergency."

"Yeah, you look to be in real dire straits out here," Bucky said, glancing around at the vast, empty cemetery surrounded by trees and headstones.

"Hey buddy, just because you're my best friend's boytoy and probably know six dozen ways to kill me doesn't mean I won't taser your ass if you get smart with me."

"It's more like eight dozen, and I'll be tempted to try if you don't cut to the chase, Lewis."

Jane shot Bucky a disapproving look. "Just tell us what's going on, Darcy."

Darcy sighed heavily. "Fine. So Steve and I were trying to conduct a seance."

"Let me stop you right there," Bucky said, holding up a hand. "Why were you conducting a seance?"

"Her old friend from college dared her to," Steve piped up.

"I'm telling the story!" Darcy pouted. "Anyway, I got a call from my old buddy, Daryl. He's kind of a paranormal enthusiast, and he's been on all these ghost hunts taking photos of haunted buildings and houses, and he told me this cemetery gets a lot of reports of spiritual activity."

"Yeah, I'm sure it does," Jane said, rolling her eyes.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Darcy snapped.

"Come on, Darcy, you know ghosts aren't real. There's nothing out here but corpses, and they're not about to just spring out of their graves."

"Well duh," Darcy said. "That would make them zombies. We're talking about ghosts."

Jane opened her mouth to continue the debate, and under any other circumstances, Bucky would've happily stood back, held her flower, and let her skin her former intern alive with her sharp, biting words. Under the current circumstances, nobody was getting a shot at her but him.

He could be getting laid right now! Darcy was going to pay for that.

"All right, forget about why you're doing this for a second. Why did you call us out here?"

Darcy bit her lip. "That's the hard part. See, it turns out holding a seance on your own doesn't really work, so I called Steve-"

"I was not helping her, I was trying to make her leave."

"Shut up, Steve, or you're sleeping on the couch tonight! Anyway, I called Steve, and I lit some more candles, and I started some chants to raise the dead that I found in this book I got at the dollar store."

"You got that at the dollar store?" asked Jane.

"Dollar stores are a doorway to another dimension, and quit interrupting," Darcy said. "So I said the chant, and at first, I didn't think it worked because nothing was happening, but then-"

"Does this story even have a point?"

"It will if you guys would let me get to it," Darcy said, hands on her hips. "You should be watching how you speak, Barnes. This mainly concerns you."

"How's that?"

"Well, did you know your parents are buried here?"

He did, and it was the other big reason he didn't want to be here. He visited his family's graves whenever his mood allowed it, usually once every two or three months. In fact, he'd planned to bring Jane on his next visit so he could introduce his mom and dad to their new daughter-in-law. He hadn't been to church once since his rehabilitation, but he liked to think they were up there watching over him.

Unless they happened to be down on earth, floating out from behind Steve looking no different from the day he shipped off to war.

"James!" His mother shouted. She was completely see through and floating a foot off the ground, but he could hear her clear as day. "Oh, my baby!"

Bucky's jaw was on the ground. He couldn't see Jane, but he could feel her squeezing his arm hard enough to snap the bones, and he could relate.

"M-m-m-mom? B-but?"

"Hey now, I'm here, too," his dad said with a grin. "Don't tell me you forgot your old man, son!"

"I- I- I-"

"And who's this enchanting young lady?" His mother floated up to Jane, who sunk to her knees, white as a sheet. "You're just as lovely as I hoped you'd be. I'm so happy to finally meet you, Jane."

"Ghosts aren't real," she said, screwing her eyes shut. "There is no scientific evidence to support the existence of ghosts so you're not really here right now."

"She's a bit of a jumpy one," Bucky's dad whispered in his ear. "Pretty, though. I always knew you'd choose your wife well."

"Th-thanks, Dad."

While Bucky tried to coax Jane to her feet and his mother bombarded them with questions about the wedding, Darcy backed up into the shadows with Steve. She blew out the last remaining candle and tucked the book under her arm.

"See? I told you we'd get something good out of this," she said.

"I guess," Steve said, pulling her into a one armed hug. "I'm still burning that thing when we get home."

"Aw, you're no fun."