Chapter 37

I told Bella about the talk with her dad and she wasn't happy with me. Okay, she was downright pissed, but these days when wasn't she? Despite all her ire though, she couldn't take her eyes off my bare chest and I internally smiled. I knew it was a bit manipulative but hey it was the same thing any red-blooded, all American boy would do, kind of like a peacock strut. Again, I find myself realizing how strangely human my life had become.

Gym class and lunch too, the last week had become one of my biggest problems, Bella's little bits of affection had grown since that night in her room. She always sought to kiss me, straddle me, touch me, and apparently she didn't care who saw. I hadn't been that intimate with her since last Saturday but she had been in a constant state of arousal since then. The school gossip had increased and on Wednesday she got in her first fight. Granted she won and it wasn't much of a fight, but that wasn't the point.

When Lauren came up to her in the cafeteria line and asked if she was screwing her way through the Cullen family, Bella said nothing but in turn popped her in the mouth, hard. On one hand I was shocked and proud, and on the other hand I was scared what this would mean for me, Bella, the family, the school, and just everyone. I didn't want her getting expelled or worse arrested. I promised Charlie I'd keep her safe, it wouldn't look good to have her arrested by her own father while I was supposed to be watching out for her. Lauren picked herself up off the floor and ran to the nurse. Her lip was bleeding and swelling quickly. I held my breath as soon as I saw Bella's arm cock just in case.

I wasn't close enough to stop her and I wondered if I would have. On some level I think Lauren deserved it. The principal came and found us sitting eating lunch with Ben and Angela who had been right by Bella when it happened. Everyone tried to explain that Bella was provoked and Principal Dekker asked us all to his office. Since I wasn't really involved, I was asked to sit outside while the four others explained the situation behind closed doors. Lauren was adamant that she didn't say anything wrong and that Bella hit her for no reason.

There was some shuffling and the sound of a chair falling over and I could feel the fear, anger, and concern coming from the room. I wanted to help but I stayed where I was, listening. It turned out Bella silently went after Lauren again but that time Ben stopped her. The odd thing was Bella never defended herself verbally, she didn't tell the principal what happened, she didn't say one thing. Bella had not had a problem finding her voice recently and I couldn't imagine what kept her tongue tied. She always kept her feelings from me these days. She said it was because she was embarrassed but I started to wonder if there was more.

She got detention which she probably wouldn't have had, if she would have defended herself verbally and/or had she not tried to attack Lauren again. Lucky for us though she was asked to go home for the rest of the day to cool off and her detention was going to be on Saturday from 8-12. I knew Peter and Charlotte were coming that day, but I wasn't sure what time.

She saw her therapist that afternoon. At her therapy appointment she mostly talked about her relationship with me and I tried hard not to listen, but I did catch that she was scared and starting to have feelings for me. To have that confirmed was liberating and constricting at the same time. Liberating because she was starting to feel for me and I was on the right track. And constricting, because I wasn't supposed to know and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it.

On that Saturday, she wanted to drive herself to detention so I let her. I stayed home and reluctantly had brunch with Charlie. I played with Spirit and at 11 a navy blue Chevy Tahoe with dark tinted windows pulled up. The doorbell rang and I was greeted with feelings of happiness and mischievousness as I went to answer the door. I was greeted with a fist in the face. The sound of metal colliding rang through the house; Charlie was in the kitchen asking what the hell that noise was. Fucking Peter, was what I wanted to say.

I called out "nothing" as he came around to see for himself with a worried look. I was rubbing my face cause that shit hurt and Charlie's eyes widened as he took in the two beautiful vampires in front of him, thankfully forgetting the noise.

Charlie's shock and curiosity over took him and Charlotte waved to him with a bright smile. She was just slightly taller than Alice, with shoulder length light brown hair. She wore tight blue jeans, an even tighter black vest with fringe that accentuated her cleavage and black cowboy boots. Peter stood at 6'3" dwarfing the woman next to him. He was eye level with me, wearing loose blue jeans, a tight black t-shirt, black cowboy boots and a black cowboy hat. Not to mention a stupid fucking grin, looking like the Cheshire cat.

"Hi," Charlie said, barely getting it out through his shock and awe.

I stepped back and invited them in, introducing them to Charlie as my brother and his wife, because we truly could pass for brothers. I felt Charlie's confusion and curiosity as he took in this bit of information before his face changed to match.

My answer was simple. "We went to different homes," I explained with a smile as I hugged Charlotte and smacked Peter on the back of the head. Not as hard as I wanted to, but hey you can do that to a brother, right? Charlie shook Peter's hand and Charlotte hugged him before he could even turn towards her. I gave her a glare because I felt her thirst rise as her body connected with his.

"What are you doin'?" I whispered, for only her to hear and she gave me a glare as she pulled back and then smiled adoringly at Charlie.

I told them Bella was in detention which of course had pissed Charlie off since Wednesday and caused Peter to chortle loudly. Once he calmed down, I explained they could go to the Cullen house where Emmett and Rose were and I would bring Bella when she got home. Peter and Charlotte agreed and bid their farewells to Charlie. But before they could leave Spirit came running straight to Charlotte and she jumped and squeaked with shock, never having been approached by an animal before.

We all got a good chuckle at her as she picked up the squirming puppy who was trying to lick at her face, though she refused to let him get that close. I couldn't say I blamed her on that one, puppy breath was horrible. Peter pet the dog in his wife's arms with amazement and Charlotte's emotions agreed. I was actually surprised the all-knowing vampire didn't know about Spirit.

After a few minutes Peter pulled Charlotte away from the puppy and I promised to bring him with us later. Peter's mischievousness sparked again as they made their way to their car and I was worried what he was planning, but there was nothing I could do. 45 minutes later I heard Bella's truck chugging down the street and knew she'd be here any minute. I couldn't help the smile that crossed my face in anticipation. Spirit was just as excited and ran to sit at the door wagging his tail waiting impatiently. He was really cute, and if it wouldn't have seemed weird I would have been standing right next to him waiting for Bella. As it was, I stayed on the sofa watching a ballgame with Charlie in silence.

I felt Bella's cocktail as she pulled in the driveway, this was the first time in over a week she had consciously let me feel her. And more impressive than her cocktail was the fact that she was pissed, fucking pissed. What the hell happened? It was fucking detention, you just sit there. I wanted to go to her but I couldn't let Charlie know I knew something was wrong, that would have seemed odd. She slammed the door to the truck loudly which was a feat because it took quite a bit of force to shut it anyhow. I looked over at Charlie to see if he noticed, he had. We both sat looking at the door full of anticipation and worry.

Bella stomped up the stairs, swinging the door open, and Spirit jumped back still wagging his tail watching her, waiting for her greeting. She didn't care; she walked right past him and into the living room glaring at me. What the fuck did I do?

"What?" I asked, because I didn't know what I did.

But she was pissed and if looks could kill, I'd be a pile of ash right now.

"Peter," she seethed and continued to glare at me like that explained everything, and to a point it did.

I closed my eyes trying to control my own anger because he pissed my angel off; she was already having a bad day having to spend half of it in detention. I opened my now black eyes meeting her hard chocolate glare.

"What'd the fucker do?" I asked angrily.

"Jasper," Charlie admonished quietly, still in shock at his daughter's fury.

I ignored him continuing to meet Bella's glare with one of my own, understanding now that her anger wasn't at me at all, it was at Peter.

"He came to the school," she said through gritted teeth.

I nodded for her to continue, I had guessed that the moment his name left her lips. Charlie sat quietly and Spirit went and sat in front of Bella trying to get her attention. She drew in a deep breath to both speak and calm herself.

"He burst into the classroom I was in, called out 'Bella Baby, I missed you!' came over to me, pulled me out of my seat, and kissed me. In. Front. Of. Everyone." She spoke through clenched teeth and I jumped to my feet.

I was going to rip that fucker's head off! He embarrassed her! He kissed her!

"I'll kill him," I said fuming.

She looked at me and narrowed her eyes.

"I'm not done," she said with anger rolling off of her, Charlie was already shocked and angry but both our eyes widened at the fact that there was more information.

"He turned around and yelled 'see ya later' down the hall as he ran off. Mister Banner asked who he was and yelled at everyone for their laughing, while I stood there in shock. He told me I planned the whole thing to disrupt detention because I didn't want to be there, so since next Saturday is part of spring break I get that one off but following one I have detention all over again!" she shrieked causing Spirit to run for the kitchen, Charlie jumped in his chair and I began heading for the door.

"Where are you going, son?" Charlie asked.

"To murder my brother," I ground out between my own clenched teeth.

That's when Bella's emotions went from being angry to mirthful. I stopped and turned around, she was smiling widely.

"Huh?" Was the best I could do.

She began cracking up and when I say cracking up, I have never seen Bella laugh like that. She had tears streaming from her eyes, her belly was rolling and she was clutching at her sides, pointing at me, and incoherently trying to speak.

"Bella?" Charlie asked, as he and I looked at each other in astonishment.

A smile crept across his lips as he began to feel joy and excitement for his daughter's laughter. I followed because although I was pissed for the trick they pulled, seeing her laugh like that was worth it. She literally wound up sitting on the floor where she stood and Spirit ran to her. She continued to laugh and wipe away the tears as she pet and hugged her puppy.

When Bella had finally composed herself she began to explain, "He did come to the school, but he was waiting for me at my truck. Of course, I knew who he was and he introduced himself and Charlotte. He explained that he had an idea to play a trick on you and wanted my help. When I told him I thought I could pull it off, we laughed and he said he'd see me at the Cullen house in a little bit."

She was smiling and still open to me, her ever present cocktail was there but she was managing it well, maybe the best she ever had. She was happy and proud. I decided after I decked the fucker for having her do that, I'd thank him. That was the happiest she had ever felt since I returned.

I walked back to her and took her hand pulling her up from the floor and hugging her.

"I'm glad everythin's okay, darlin'," I whispered and felt Charlie walk over to us as his emotions became longing.

I pulled back and scooted her into his waiting arms, he smiled at me over her shoulder and we nodded to each other knowingly. She was going to be alright.

Bella and I got Spirit's stuff together and made our way over to the other house. Bella didn't seem to have a problem coming here after those first couple of times. And after Valentine's Day it never seemed to be an issue, for which I was glad. Peter's SUV was parked out front, so I parked next to him. I convinced Bella on the ride over that we were going to play the same trick on Peter and pretend she hadn't told me the truth. I ran into the house projecting anger and hate, sniffing Peter out. Perfect.

I ran upstairs and into the guest room to find Char in the middle of unpacking a bag. When she felt me and saw the rage in my eyes hers widened.

"It was just a joke, Jasper," she gasped out because the anger was affecting her and her fear rose.

They knew better than to fuck with me, I heard the shower turn off and smirked evilly at Char. I shut the projection of emotions off and walked silently over to the door. Peter opened it and I greeted him with a fist in the face the same way he did to me earlier. He was only wearing a towel and when I hit him his hands went up to defend himself effectively dropping the towel. Bella had apparently made it through the door at that moment and gasped.

Peter was shocked at first and then smirked at her as his erection grew and Bella just stared in awe at his growing cock. Char and I continually looked between each other, then at Bella and Peter with shock. Gathering my senses quickly, I rushed to her side threw her over my shoulder and ran her to my room down the hall, while she squealed.

"Fucker!" I called out as I went and I heard Char's giggles overshadowed by the crowing laughter of Peter.

Apparently Emmett and Rose weren't home or they would have come to see what was going on. I was so focused on getting to Peter I didn't even notice they weren't there. I tossed Bella onto the bed and she squeaked again as she bounced lightly and then began giggling as her face heated up. I couldn't help it I just chuckled at her. I loved to see her smile and be happy.

"You, Miss Swan, are a naughty girl." I said crossing my arms over my chest and trying to give her an angry look but her giggles were contagious.

Before I knew what I was doing I leaped on to her, pinning her to the bed. Her giggles abruptly stopped as she looked me in the eyes. I smiled down at her.

"Did you like what you saw in there?" I asked with a smirk and she got even redder as she registered my words.

Her blood pooled in her face and was deliciously close to my own. Her heat and smell enveloped me. I let a little growl escape as I smelled her arousal adding to the mixture. Her eyes widened at first, and then she smirked right back at me.

"Jealous?" she asked with amusement dancing in her eyes.

Why, that little…

"Nope," I said with a grin, when in truth I was, a little bit.

I'm pretty sure that was the first time she'd seen a naked man and I had hoped it would be me and only me for that matter.

"Fucker," I said again loud enough even Bella could hear and Peter's laughter rang through the house again.

I could feel myself hardening as I put some of my weight on Bella, letting her feel me as I soaked up her heat, because yeah I couldn't pass that shit up. Her eyes became hooded and I knew mine began to darken.

I looked from her eyes to her lips in question and she nodded just slightly. It was all very subtle but it was all the communication we needed. I leaned in and gently pressed my cold steel lips to the fiery satin of Bella's and felt as they formed around mine. That was the first contact I'd initiated since last weekend. I opened the same time she did and easily slid my tongue in to taste the warm sugary sweet taste that was Bella. Her blush made her that much warmer and fragrant, and I reveled in the feeling as her heart pounded against my chest it almost felt as though I had heartbeat of my own.

Balanced on my right forearm I brought my other hand tracing lightly down her side, grazing the side of her breast just like I did when I put my shirt on her a week ago. I let my hand linger just under the hem of her shirt at her waist, rubbing my thumb back and forth along the textured skin of her stomach. I slowly began following the vertical scars of her stomach up to her breast and gently cupped it over her bra. She moaned at the contact and I began kissing down her neck and going to that sensitive spot behind her ear, to which she gladly turned her head to allow me easy access as my name slipped in a whisper from her lips.

Her hands ghosted lightly over my back before they started pulling my shirt up and over my head. I pulled back long enough to toss it on the floor. She let her hands run up my marbled chest as I lowered myself back down onto her.

"Jasper," she whispered with pleading eyes as I felt her nervousness and anticipation.

"Bella," I whispered back. I didn't know what else to say so I kissed her, hard.

I tried to let her feel all of my love and desire for her through that kiss. I pulled back giving her a few chaste kisses as I looked down between our bodies to see her trying to undo my pants. I looked back at her with a questioning expression.

She was determined and scared, but I was happy I could still feel her.

"Bella?" I asked finally when the look I gave her was met with nothing but a sheepish glance at me.

Her hands had stilled in the meantime but it was just last week that she was a nervous wreck and trying to seduce me.

"I'm ready, Jasper," she whispered but I could still hear her voice shake as she said it. I knew no matter what she was always going to be scared and nervous her first time. But this wasn't planned; hell I wasn't sure this should happen. The one emotion I wanted to be there wasn't. She didn't love me, she felt affectionately for me and she lusted for me that was obvious but she didn't love me. Although, I knew what she told her therapist and I also knew she could hide specific emotions from me.

As a matter of fact after thinking about her performance earlier in the day I'm not sure anything I felt from her could be legitimate other than her cocktail. I knew that shit was real and not going away anytime soon, or so it would seem. I abruptly sat back as I realized that. It was a second too late to realize it was going to hurt her feelings. I immediately felt her shock followed by self-loathing, embarrassment, and disappointment. I immediately felt guilty in return.

"Bella?" I asked looking at her. "I'm sorry, honey," I apologized for pulling away. "I just realized somethin' though and I have a question for you. What exactly are you feelin' or were you feelin' a moment ago?"

She looked at me puzzled and cocked her head to the side, almost making me chuckle when I thought of Spirit doing the same thing. Spirit? I listened for him, Bella had left him downstairs and I could hear a calm heartbeat. He was resting it sounded like in the living room somewhere. That would work for now and I focused back on the issue at hand.

"Jasper, you can feel what I'm feeling. I've been letting you in since I got home," she said confused as to why I was questioning her.

But I had to ask because she told the therapist she had feelings for me but I couldn't feel them.

"I don' think you're sharin' them all, darlin'."

Her eyes widened just a fraction before she quickly got it under control. It was enough to tell me I was right, her emotions didn't change at my statement so she had that under control as well. She was good. If I was human I'd be lost, as it was, as vampire with the ability to feel and manipulate emotions I still didn't feel like I was doing great.

I rested on my heels looking at her waiting for her to say something. Peter's voice wafted through the house but she couldn't hear it, "Just ask her."

And I bit back the desire to call him a fucker once again. Not sure which question I should ask, I went for the one I hoped to get the best answer to.

"Bella, can I feel all of your emotions, please?"

She closed her eyes and bit her lip. She was biting it so hard I was afraid she was going to draw blood. I moved my hand to cup her face and she opened her eyes. I pulled gently on her lip with my thumb for her to release it.

"Please, Bella?" I inquired again, hoping she'd give me something.

I waited and traced the outline of her lips with my finger. Her lust grew and her eyes fluttered closed again. I hadn't realized I had leaned over her until I felt the gentle warm breeze of her breath on my face. Making a quick decision, I tried a new tactic. I kissed her gently and pulled back.

"Please?" kiss, "Please?" kiss, and I repeated it a few more times as I began to feel the change in the air. An electricity began buzzing between our bodies as I felt her cocktail grow, but I was prepared.

She became nervous, scared, worried, and terrified, as the affection started flowing out of her. It hummed between us. It wasn't true love, but there was affection, adoration, attraction, lust, and passion. It was all in there and it was swirling within her eyes as she held my gaze fondly. She did love me just not deeply and she was terrified.

I wasn't even sure of what. If she was terrified to let me feel her love, of what we were doing, or of her desire to love but not get hurt again. I knew this was a big topic for her in therapy, being able to trust enough to try again. I was anxious and still hovering over her.

"Bella, do you love me?" I just wanted a straight answer; her emotions didn't help me as much as I had hoped.

She was too confused and scared within herself. Not to mention the strength of her cocktail was nearly unbearable. As it was, I was getting pretty good at blocking those emotions, something I never thought I'd be able to do.

I watched her eyes as the fear overtook them and I gently kissed her again. I don't know why but I just started talking. Feeling compelled to reassure her.

"Bella, it's okay to love, it's okay to let go of him, and it's okay to take that chance. You've gotta try, darlin'. It doesn' have to be me but let it go, let go of your pain. You don't have to suffer. I promise I'll take care of you. However, you're willin' to let me." As I spoke gently, tears began to pool in her eyes and her bottom lip began to quiver.

Her emotions didn't change despite the change in her demeanor. I knew she was still hiding something, but I couldn't imagine what, other than the sadness causing her tear up.

"Bella, let it go, open up to me, darlin'," I beseeched her as I continued to pepper her face with kisses, trying to help her keep the tears at bay.

Her eyes closed, the tears forced gently down her face and I lost the one connection I seemed to have with her. The hum between our bodies ceased and I felt empty, though her emotions were overwhelming, the sense of loneliness was infinite. I angled my body above hers and she opened her eyes to the movement. The hum did not return.

I stared into the glassy chocolate orbs for a moment, looking at my broken angel. I decided to make one last ditch effort to get her to open up to me.

"I. Love. You." I said with as much feeling as I could and brought my lips to hers once again.

I forced my love for her out and into her where our bodies touched and she gasped just a little as she felt it. It was difficult to concentrate on as her emotions shrouded me, but I did it. I even gave a little pride in there because I was able to do it and I knew she felt it.

Our mouths moved together in perfect synchronization and my tongue explored the inferno of her sweet mouth. Her tongue gently caressed mine as I let my love flow into her. Then I felt it and I froze. Her fear, anger, and guilt rose to a crushing weight and I nearly collapsed on her. I did not understand how this creature could feel so passionately, so strongly, that she brought me to my knees, literally. I knew she felt me falter but I did my best to ignore it and continue to kiss her gently pulling back a second here and there to let her get a breath before returning to the sensuous kiss.

As my love flowed into her I began to feel a love so strong I didn't know it was possible from a human. She loved me and it scared her to death. Her heart was pounding so hard and quickly, I was afraid she was going to have a heart attack, she began sweating, and her body began to shake with her fear. I tried to calm her down. She wasn't allowing it though and her emotions continued to engulf and confuse me. I was positive of three things at that moment, (1) Bella loved me, (2) this was going to change everything now, and (3) Peter was standing outside the door.

Shit.