Chapter 37

Three days later Diego, Victoria and Ramon boarded the stagecoach to Santa Barbara; they had decided to go by public coach instead of their own private carriage as the weather had been overcast for the last two days and they did not want run the risk of rain because the de la Vega's carriage was an open one and none of them wanted to sit in the carriage all wet and cold. They loaded their luggage at the rear of the stage and as they climbed aboard and settled into their seats, they greeted their fellow passengers, an older man and his wife who were on their way to Monterey and soon Victoria began chatting with the lady about babies and Diego talked politics with the gentleman, leaving Ramon with his thoughts.

Ramon was feeling a little anxious; he was leaving the tavern for the first time since Diego and Victoria signed the ownership over to him and it didn't feel right to leave it unattended. He had asked their Alcalde if one or two of their lancers would keep an eye on the business, to make sure that there weren't any problems with rowdy patrons and the Alcalde had agreed. He also offered to station two lancers in the tavern at night if they had any overnight guests. Ramon was most grateful for the offer considering that both Pilar and Raquel had agreed to stay in the tavern themselves; he didn't like the idea of leaving them alone.

The thought of Raquel brought a small smile to his face as he remembered a month ago when he asked if she would be willing to delay her journey to San Diego and to take a job at the tavern as their cook. Her face had lit up with the most genuine smile he had ever seen causing his heart to skip a beat at how radiant it made her and then she had impulsively hugged him as she accepted his offer but then she scrambled backwards as she realised what she had done and had blushed deep red and apologised profusely. He couldn't stop thinking how lovely she was, with her rosy cheeks and stammering apology and now a month later, he knew that he was attracted to her but at the moment he was content to let their friendship grow. And besides he wasn't sure of what she felt, if anything, for him and he didn't want to ruin what they had in case he was wrong.

But now as they approached the outskirts of Santa Barbara, it was Victoria who dwelled on her thoughts while Diego and Ramon chatted. She looked out the window and reflected that it had been exactly a year ago since she had last travelled on this stage coach to attend Francisco's wedding. Little did she know how much her life would change just by the simple act of travelling to Santa Barbara. Not only had she attended her brother's wedding, she had also worked out the secret of Zorro's identity after five long years and discovered that she had always loved Diego and just when they were making plans for their future, she had been shot trying to help a young woman from being assaulted and the outcome of that, changed her life forever. She felt as though her life had come full circle as she returned to the place where it all started and she was having mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, she was excited and eager to see her nephew but on the other hand, she didn't want to go through it all again; she had put it all behind her and had gone on with life but now she had to confront it over again.

They came to a lurching stop outside the office of the stage coach company and waiting for them was Felipe and Francisco, who was in his uniform. Victoria smiled broadly as she stepped down from the coach and embraced her eldest brother. "Oh Francisco, it's great to finally get here. I can't wait to see little Alfonso. What's he like? How's Rebecca?"

Francisco laughed as he hugged her tight. "They're both fine little sister, as you will soon see. But I see that you are looking wonderful yourself." he complimented as he stepped back and took in her slightly swollen stomach.

Victoria grinned as she placed her hand on her stomach. "Yes, I'm fine now that the sickness has gone."

"So, brother, what is it like to be a father?" Ramon grinned as he stepped down from the stage and embraced him.

Francisco chuckled and shook his head. "Let's say that I have gained an understanding into our parents that I never had before."

Diego smiled warmly as he turned to his son. "How did it go with the Alcalde?"

Felipe shrugged. "It went okay." he replied.

Francisco grinned as he turned and faced his brother-in-law. "I say it went rather well. Felipe has made it to the final list of three applicants and I believe that the Alcalde will be making a decision in the next couple of days."

"That's wonderful son." Diego felt a surge of pride through him.

Felipe shrugged again. "The other two men are lancers and I don't have any military experience at all." he was trying not to get his hopes up too high in case he wasn't selected but he was really interested in the posting. He knew it would be a challenge but he felt that it was something he needed; ranch life was hard physical work but he wanted more than that, he wanted to use his mind as well.

Victoria offered her support. "If the Alcalde was really concerned about your lack of military training, I don't think he would have put you on the list. Isn't that right Francisco?"

Francisco nodded. "Yes, that's very true. You have a high chance of obtaining that post. But let's get your bags and if you don't mind Victoria, we can walk home. Or if you like I can get a wagon from the cuartel."

Victoria shook her head. "No, its fine, walking will be good for me."

"Good, good. Ah here we go." he said as the driver handed down their bags and once everyone was right, they started walking towards Irene's home, chattering with high spirits.

As they turned down the street where Irene lived, Victoria started feeling anxious, her heart started to race and she felt a rush of nauseous surge through her and she didn't understand why. She no longer had the sickness that she had earlier in her pregnancy and she had eaten nothing spicy or food that had tasted bad but it wasn't until they reached the house, that she understood her unease. She came to a stop outside Irene's house and stared down at the ground, shivering in recognition of the place. She put her hand to stomach and took deep breaths in an effort to calm herself but she felt it rise up in her throat.

Diego soon noticed that Victoria wasn't following them anymore and turned around. When he saw how pale she had become, he went back to her. "Victoria, what's wrong?" he asked worried as he put his arm around her waist and was surprised by the strength of her shudders.

"This is where it happened, wasn't it? Where that man shot me." she replied hoarsely. "Oh god, I'm going to be sick." she quickly turned around and vomited on the side of the road.

Diego silently cursed himself as he held his wife as she bent over and was sick on the road. He should have realised what coming to Irene's would mean to her; that it would bring back all the horrible memories of the shooting and then the operation that saved her life; he should have booked into one of the taverns and save her from this. "It's alright Victoria, everything is okay." he tried to soothe her.

She nodded as she straightened up and wiped her mouth with a handkerchief that he gave her; she was glad of Diego's supporting arm around her; she didn't think she would be able to stand without it.

"Come inside, my dear." Irene said worriedly as she crossed over to them.

Victoria tried to smile but she was still feeling a little ill. "Thank you Irene." she replied as she allowed Diego to guide her through the small gate and then inside the house.

"I'll show you to your room and you can rest for awhile." Irene said as she walked down the corridor and to a room near the back of her house that she had set aside for them.

"I'm sorry." Victoria said as they entered the room and she sat on the bed, still shivering from shock.

"Nonsense, there's nothing to be sorry about." Irene said as she fussed over her charge while Diego placed their bags on the floor. "Here, put this wrap around you." she said as she reached to the end of the bed and pulled a soft wool wrap around her trembling shoulders before she crossed over to the window and pulled the drapes closed, darkening the room. She turned and saw Diego sitting on the bed beside her with his arm around her waist. "Now there's a water jug on the side table and a pot under the bed in case you need it." she said kindly.

"Gracias Irene." Victoria replied as she leant into Diego's embrace.

Irene smiled warmly. "You're welcome, my dear. Now just rest until you are ready to come out and if you need anything just send Diego to me."

Diego nodded and gave the older woman a smile of gratitude. "Thank you."

She smiled back and left them alone, closing the door behind her.

Victoria sagged into her husband's arms. "Oh Diego, I thought I was over this." she whispered hoarsely.

He held her tight against him. "It's just the sudden shock of seeing the place where it happened, that's all. I should have realised that coming here would bring back bad memories." he said as he gently rocked her.

She shook her head as she slowly relaxed in his arms. "I didn't realise it either, until I stopped and saw...Oh Diego, I have never hated anyone like I hate that man, not even Ramone and de Soto for all the evil things they had done."

He planted a soft kiss to her hair. "That's only natural querida; in a way, he stole your life from you. A life that would have been so different from what you have now." He paused for a moment. "Do you remember much of it?" They rarely spoke of the actual shooting and wondered how much she remembered.

She sighed as she straightened up but still kept within the circle of his arms. "I do remember you coming here to make sure we were okay and then you left to get your things from your lodgings. Irene and I waited for you and then there was a woman's scream from outside..." she paused as she frowned, her memory was still somewhat hazy. "I grabbed a pistol and went outside...the woman was struggling with two men and I think I shot one of them." her frown deepened. "I think I heard Irene calling out my name but I don't remember much else."

He nodded. "That's pretty much what happened, I guess you'll never remember of all it." he replied as he gently pulled back. "You should lie down and rest for a while querida, you'll feel better if you do."

She nodded, for once not arguing with him as she struggled to remove her jacket; she was feeling tired both physically and emotionally,

"Here let me do that." he said softly as he started to unbutton her jacket and once that was off, he then started on her blouse, just enough to reach the lacings of her corset and loosened it for her before he knelt down and removed her shoes. "Would you like some water?" he asked as he stood up.

Victoria nodded as she realised that her throat was sore and dry. "Yes please."

Diego went over to the side table and poured some water into a glass and moved back to her. "Here." he said as he held it out to her.

She took it gratefully and carefully sipped at the water, soothing her raspy throat. "Thank you." she said as she gave the glass back to him and then she lowered herself down onto the bed and laid on her side while Diego pulled up a light coverlet over her and kissed her head. "Sleep if you can Victoria."

She nodded as she settled more comfortably and before she knew it, she was fast asleep.

Several hours later when Victoria woke with a start; she didn't know where she was and it took her a couple of moments to remember. She stretched and tossed back the cover and slowly sat up. She swallowed in an effort to ease her dry and slightly sore throat and then she remembered the water jug on the table. She rose stiffly and crossed the room and poured herself a glass of water and took a long drink; she was thirstier then she realised and poured herself another glass.

She placed the glass back on the table and looked around the room; the large bed took up most of the space, with just enough room for a cupboard and a chest of drawers as well as the side table and a chair. She also noticed that Diego must have unpacked their things while she was asleep as she saw some of their clothing hanging from the slightly open door of the cupboard. A small smile tugged at her lips; she was one lucky woman to have such a caring husband, she mused to herself as she adjusted her clothing. She left her room and walked down the hallway towards the sounds of happy chatting.

As she entered the sitting room, she smiled as she saw her family all gathered together.

"Victoria, you're looking much better. How are you feeling?" Irene asked as she stood up and hugged the younger woman.

Victoria smiled as she returned Irene's warm embrace. "I'm feeling much better now." she replied

"Good, good. Now let me look at you." she grinned as she looked down at Victoria's swollen stomach. "Yes, you're coming along now, aren't you. How many months is it now, five?"

"Yes, just over five months." Victoria replied with a grin of her own as she placed her hand on her belly.

Irene nodded thoughtfully as she studied the younger woman. "Mmmm. I think you're having a boy." she predicted.

Victoria raised an eyebrow as Rebecca came over to her. "A boy! How can you tell?"

"It's in the way your baby is sitting; it's all out in front of you whereas a girl sits more lower around the hips." Irene said.

Rebecca chuckled. "Mama said the same about me and she was right." she said as she hugged her sister-in-law.

Victoria chuckled too. "Well I don't care if it's a boy or girl, I just want a healthy baby. You're looking good yourself." she said as she hugged her sister back.

Rebecca smiled. "Thank you Victoria but I am feeling a little tired; it's from all the early morning feeds." she said.

Victoria nodded in sympathy; it was something that she would have to get used to herself. "I understand. Now when can I meet my nephew?" she asked, almost bouncing on her toes in her eagerness to see the baby.

"How about right now." Francisco's voice came from behind her.

Victoria twirled around and saw her brother walking through the doorway, proudly cradling his baby son in his arms. "Ooohh, he's so adorable." she cooed as she saw her nephew for the first time. She reached out and gently brushed her finger along his cheek. "Sooo soft and he has the cutest little nose and look at his black hair; it looks like he has been out in the wind." she gushed as she smoothed down the soft wispy hair causing him to whimper and open his eyes.

"Ohhh, hello little Alfonso, I'm your Aunt Victoria" she said softly as she ran her finger down his soft cheek again. She so much wanted to hold him but she wasn't sure how she could; not with such a small and precious bundle.

Irene saw the longing on Victoria's face and she had a sudden idea of how to help her. "Diego, come and stand behind Victoria."

Everyone looked up at the older lady in confusion but Diego did as he asked and stood behind his wife.

"Now put your right arm around in front of her. You'll be using your arm as Victoria's." Irene said.

Diego nodded as he realised what she was trying to say and placed his arm around her shoulder. It was then Victoria realised what Irene meant; that Diego would use his arm in place of her own and she fought back hot tears in gratitude.

It took some moments to work out the best position but Francisco finally placed his infant son into the combined arms of Victoria and Diego.

"Ohhh, thank you Irene. I would never have thought of this." Victoria said as she gazed at the little babe in her arms or rather, in their arms. "Isn't he the cutest thing you have ever seen Diego." she whispered as she reached out and gently touched Alfonso's tiny hand and fingers causing him to scrunch up his face at the sensation.

Diego's warm breath tickled her neck. "Yes, I must admit he is cute." he said as he gazed over her shoulder and down at Alfonso, longing for the day when they could finally hold their own child.

Rebecca placed her arm around Francisco and smiled warmly at the sight of Victoria and Diego entranced by her son; it was something she knew all too well. "You two look very comfortable with him." she teased.

Victoria chuckled but didn't look up, she couldn't take her eyes of her nephew. "So comfortable that we might just take him home. You would like that wouldn't you Alfonso, to come home with us and see all the cows and horses and chickens." she babbled as she leant down and planted a feather light kiss to his forehead.

Diego rolled his eyes and exchanged a look with Francisco. "They're called cattle, Victoria, not cows." he teased his wife.

"Shush Diego, to a little baby, they're just cows and they go moo moo, don't they little one." she said softly.

Felipe and Ramon, who had both been quiet since Victoria came into the room, laughed out loud at the sight of a well dressed Doña, mooing at a little baby but one look from her silenced them, although it couldn't keep the silly grins off their faces.

"You shouldn't be laughing Felipe, not after the last time you held a baby." Diego teased his son as he remembered the time he rescued the Russian baby from bandits.

"That sounds like an interesting tale." Francisco said.

Diego grinned but before he could reply, Alfonso started crying.

"Shhhh, little one." Victoria crooned trying to settle him but his cries intensified until Rebecca moved closer and carefully took her crying baby from their arms and tried to sooth her son but then she realised what was bothering him.

"I think he needs changing." she said with a smile as she turned and left the room.

"I'll come with you." Victoria said, she couldn't get enough of the little babe as she followed her sister-in-law out of the room.

Later that evening Francisco persuaded Diego to tell them about the tale he had alluded to earlier.

So with great humour, Diego regaled them of the story of the Russian baby that he had come across in the wagon that had been attacked by bandits and of how both he and Felipe, two bachelors who had no idea of how to care for a baby, tried to comfort the baby girl. He simply couldn't tell his father for that meant explanations as to not only why he had this baby but HOW he came to find her; he might have been able to think up some silly reason but for almost the first time in his life, he just didn't know what to do.

They all laughed hilariously when he told them that Felipe had used his study of Archimedes as a diaper because he couldn't think of anything else to use, not even a clean shirt that was hanging on the rack; which caused the younger man's ears turn pink in embarrassment because he never even noticed the shirt and he quickly reverted back to his signs to tell his father what he thought; which Diego studiously ignored.

They laughed again as Victoria recalled the time when he had brought the basket carrying the baby girl to the tavern kitchen and when she had asked him if he had feed the baby, she had been shocked to hear that he wasn't sure if she had been. She had thought that it had been a rather simple question; either she had been feed or she hadn't. And then with a little embarrassment, she told them of the relief that she had felt when he told her that the baby wasn't his and as expected, she received some light hearted teasing from her brothers to her reaction.

They stayed up chatting and laughing together before the toll of travelling overcame them and they said their goodnights and retired to their rooms.

The following day Francisco had to go back on duty so Diego, Felipe and Ramon went sightseeing around Santa Barbara, while leaving the three ladies to gossip together about marriage, husbands and babies.

"Are you sure you don't mind me being here while you feed Alfonso?" Victoria asked as she sat down on a chair in Rebecca's room.

Rebecca smiled as settled down on another chair and put her son to her breast. "Of course not." She replied as she gazed down at her suckling baby. "You know you can ask me anything about this, I mean I had mama to show me what to do but I know there is no-one you can turn to for advice or help."

Victoria nodded sadly; it was at a time like this that she really missed her own mother, not only for her love but for advice about marriage and babies. "I will hold you to that Rebecca." she said with a smile.

Rebecca grinned. "I don't doubt it." she replied as she shifted slightly to a more comfortable position and started crooning softly as she touched the fine hair on Alfonso's head.

Victoria watched with growing emotions of love and happiness, soon she would be holding her own child to her breast but underneath the happiness was the realisation that she wouldn't be able to hold her child without help; the day before had shown her that and now watching Rebecca feeding her son, it became even more apparent that she couldn't do it on her own. She was beginning to suspect that even with the wooden arm that Diego was going to make for her, it may not be enough, especially with changing the baby's soiled clothing and washing him or her.

She hated the idea of having someone else care for her baby but she was realising that she would have give up some more of her strong sense of independence; just as she had to when she first lost her arm. It had been hard to accept that she couldn't do everything anymore and this was just something else that she had to face. I guess this is how my life is going to be from now on, having to adjust to each and every new situation that comes along, she mused to herself.

"Was it terribly painful, giving birth?" she asked somewhat fearful. She supposed that all women felt the same anxiety about the birthing process, especially for their first child but she was glad that she could actually talk with someone about it; someone who would tell her what it really was about and not gloss over it in any way, just to spare her feelings.

Rebecca looked up and nodded. "I won't lie, it was the most painful experience that I have ever had but mama told me that when I hold my baby for the first time, I would forget all about the pain and she was right. Seeing and holding this little miracle made everything I went through worthwhile. But having said that, I want to wait awhile before going through it again." She smiled warmly at her sister. "Have you and Diego thought about a name yet?" she asked as she noticed that Alfonso had stopped suckling and she moved him to her shoulder and gently rubbed his back.

Victoria grinned when she heard a little burp from her nephew and watched as Rebecca placed him on her other breast. "Yes, we have and if we have a boy, Diego wants to name him Edmund, after his mentor at university. He was rather close to him and I think that he had been like a father to Diego in ways that Alejandro wasn't." She had known of the high regard that Diego had for Sir Edmund ever since the time the English Knight had come to Los Angeles and had died in Diego's arms. She wasn't going to deny him the right to name their son after him.

Rebecca nodded. "And if it's a girl?"

Victoria shrugged. "We're not sure yet but Diego is letting me choose since he wants Edmund for a boy. I was thinking about Maria, which was my mother's name but our cook is Maria and I know a number of other ladies with that name. There's my grandmother's name of Mercedes that I quite like and I also like Luisa or even Josefina." she shook her head. "I can't really make up my mind."

Rebecca chuckled. "I know, we had agreed on Alfonso but we couldn't decide on a girl's name at all. It was lucky that we had a boy."

While Rebecca and Victoria discussed baby names, their menfolk were seated at a tavern nearby the barracks; they had arranged to have lunch with Francisco when he had his break. They had just been served their drinks when Francisco entered the tavern with a small frown on his face.

"What's wrong?" Ramon asked his brother as he sat down beside him.

Francisco sighed. "I've just been ordered to report to the garrison at Monterey and I have to leave by the end of the week." he said.

The others glanced at each other but it was Ramon who asked the question. "How long will you be gone for and what about Rebecca and the baby?"

Francisco shrugged. "It's a permanent assignment for at least a year so they will be coming with me." he answered as he looked at Felipe. "If you do get the position, you'll have to understand that you can be transferred at any time, to anywhere they tell you. Sometimes with your family but other times you will have to leave them for months or even years at a time."

Felipe nodded thoughtfully. "I know and I do accept it but I never realised until now that it would be hard to leave a wife and children behind, not after staying with you over the last couple of days."

Diego nodded. "Father he missed my birth because he was with his men; it's something he regrets but mother understood." Diego said.

Francisco nodded. "Rebecca understands as well. We talked a great deal about it before we married and she still married me even with the knowledge that one day, I would get a posting where she couldn't come. And of course there's always the possibility of going to war and never coming back." He sighed and shook his head; he didn't want to leave Rebecca a widow before her time and have Alfonso live without a father but he knew he wouldn't have it any other way, he liked being in the military.

In order to change the subject, he turned to his brother and grinned. "So what's this I hear about a senorita throwing herself into your arms..."

Ramon groaned. "Did Victoria tell you?"

Francisco chuckled. "Actually it was Rebecca who told me but..."

"She heard it from our sister." Ramon added, shaking his head, the tips of his ears turning pink with some embarrassment.

Francisco exchange a grin with Diego; it wasn't often that he saw his brother affected this way about a senorita, perhaps there was something more to the story than what he was led to believe. "So Ramon, will there be a wedding soon." he teased him.

Ramon grinned at his brother. "Maybe, maybe not." he replied vaguely as he held up his glass. "Here's to all the senoritas in the world, may they throw themselves at me, anytime they wish."

Diego, Felipe and Francisco laughed out loud as they raised their glasses. "Here, here."