Disclaimer: The characters still don't belong to me, just messing around with the plot line.

A/N: I know I say thanks every time I post, but you all really do inspire me to keep writing as fast as possible. And thank you so much for all the get well wishes! I'm definitely feeling better, just a lingering cold. Happy early Thanksgiving, or just happy Thursday!

Special Thanks to Jess and Stacy, my fabulous betas, and Ulli, my German translator!

From Before…

Harry couldn't help but snort in amusement at Ron's exaggerated tone. "Alright," he found himself agreeing as he nodded his head. He was rewarded with a grin from his red-headed friend.

Ch. 37- Repercussions

Receiving another lecture from Albus was not Severus's idea of a good time. They had spent much of the afternoon working on new information to feed to the Dark Lord, but of course he couldn't escape without another conversation about his personal relationship with the Boy Who Lived. He should have seen this coming.

"Now, how are things with Harry?" Dumbledore asked cheerfully, as though the whole incident last night had never happened.

"This conversation seems a bit redundant, does it not?" Severus answered, as though extremely bored.

The wizened old wizard folded his hands together on his desk and gave Snape a long look over his half moon spectacles. Severus just barely managed to squash the feeling to squirm like a petulant child under his father's glare.

"You underestimate the amount of love that child has to offer," the headmaster said solemnly.

"And you overestimate mine," Severus deadpanned, causing Albus to chuckle.

"If we are done here," Severus added, gathering up his papers, "then I have work to do."

He was halfway to the door before Dumbledore stopped him.

"Severus, many people have given you another chance, and Harry has already proven he will as well, and yet you still will not give the same to that boy?"

He didn't give the Headmaster an answer as he stormed from the office.

It had nothing to do with giving Harry another chance. If anyone deserved that it was Harry, but Severus knew he was not the one worthy of giving it to him as Harry had made it quite clear that he had his godfather to worry about.

Unfortunately for Severus, in the process of promising to help the boy this summer, he had grown far too attached. He already wanted the child in his life in a much more permanent way and it was obvious that was not possible. If he didn't put a stop to it now, it would hurt far worse later and Severus would not be humiliated like that again.

-SS-

Severus half expected to find Harry waiting for him in the study, attempting to continue their conversation from the morning, but the boy wasn't there. A little pang of hurt struck him at the idea that he had succeeded in pushing Harry away so quickly. He couldn't deny it had been nice knowing someone who cared was waiting for him. But it didn't matter. He didn't need Harry just like the teen didn't need him, or at least that was what he tried to tell himself.

It was almost time for dinner and after a quick check of Harry's room, Severus was certain the boy was still at Grimmauld Place. Although he hadn't given Harry a set time to return and they wouldn't routinely have another Occlumency lesson until tomorrow, Severus decided he felt like being spiteful.

In a matter of minutes he was stepping gracefully into the kitchen of Grimmauld Place. The sight that greeted him only served to fuel his resentment.

Harry's two little side-kicks were seated at the table while the room was distinctly void of the brat himself. It took only a second for Severus to conclude that Harry was off spending more quality time with the mutt.

"Where's Potter?" he asked coldly. He watched in amusement as the Granger girl's eyes widened to the size of galleons and the Weasley boy gulped nervously. Hmm, so the brat was up to no good.

He was greeted with silence from the two teens.

"Questions customarily warrant answers," Snape drawled before snapping out, "Now!"

"Uhh, he's not here, sir," Granger managed to stutter out.

"What do you mean, he's not here?" Snape hissed angrily. Who authorized the boy to go somewhere else? Certainly not the Headmaster. If that idiot, Black, did something foolish he would strangle them both.

"He went back to your manor about an hour ago, Professor," Granger continued meekly.

Severus' train of thought came to an abrupt halt. But he had checked Harry's room and the boy hadn't been there, or in the study, the two most logical places. And he distinctly remembered seeing the teen's Firebolt propped up by the patio door.

"He said he wanted to brew more potions to help you out," the young witch continued to explain even as Weasley blatantly tried to get her to shut up by elbowing her in the arm.

"What?" Severus thundered, effectively hiding the panic invading his mind. The foolish brat was brewing without any supervision and Severus hadn't even had a chance to put away the new ingredients he had acquired. It would be so easy for an untrained child to confuse powdered root of phytolacca and asphodel.

He turned on his heel, intent on getting back to the manor and grounding Harry until he turned thirty, but Weasley had him halting in his tracks.

"You can't be mad at him!" he shouted bravely.

Severus turned slowly and gave the teen his best scowl, proving he most certainly could be mad at Harry. The look would have typically had Weasley petrified in his spot, but surprisingly the Gryffindor plunged on ahead.

"He's brewing potions to help YOU," he said indignantly. "He said you've been mad at him and he's trying to fix things. But why you mean so much to him is beyond me."

The scowl never left Severus' face, which probably only fueled the anger in Ron's voice, but internally Severus was dumbfounded. Had Harry really said that and went through that trouble to try and fix things?

He didn't give the Gryffindors any type of response, but turned quickly and disappeared through the floo. Before even stepping completely out of the fireplace he was already shouting.

"POTTER!"

He hoped his demanding tone would at least have the boy meeting him halfway, but that didn't stop Severus from picking up his own pace.

A thousand scenarios were now flying through his head, each one involving a far worse potions accident than the last and the panic was starting to creep into his voice.

"POTTER!" he shouted again, hoping to see the boy appear at the top of the stairs as he passed by or come out of the kitchen door, but there was no such luck.

The hallway to the lab seemed to go on for miles and Severus cursed having such a large manor. He burst through the door with such force that he didn't have time to prepare for the cloud of gas that assaulted him. He'd been breathing heavily on his brisk trek and took in a huge gulp of the noxious chemicals.

He had to turn back to the door, choking and coughing as he covered his mouth with his sleeve until he could find fresh air again. The smog had already begun to sting his eyes, but he quickly pulled out his wand and cast a charm to clear some of the immediate air.

The haze hung so thick in the room that it muted the lights, but Severus would know the lab blind-folded. He quickly cut a straight path towards the workbench and once within a few feet of it, he spotted the crumpled figure on the floor.

There had only been a few times Severus had felt his heart plummet to the floor quite like this and every muscle in his body seemed like it was gripped in fear, but he wasted no time in scooping Harry up and dashing back out of the room, letting the air cleaning charm fail as he waved the door open. Without really a thought he had it sealed shut again, preventing any of the dangerous fumes from following.

Once out in the relative safety of the hall, Severus cradled Harry's head in his hand as he laid the boy down on the floor. With his wand hand extricated, he shot off two frantic Patronuses to Madame Pomfrey and Dumbledore, before leaning over to check Harry's breathing. It was shallow and sporadic and Severus had no idea how long the boy had been breathing in the toxic fumes.

He could feel his heart beating in his throat and the panic was threatening to overwhelm him. He wanted to scream and shout and shake the child. He always remained calm and in control in the face of any emergency, but he'd never really been presented with someone he cared about being dangerously injured. He felt unbelievably helpless. Even with the threat of the Dark Lord going after Lily and desperately approaching Dumbledore for help, he felt as though the situation had been controlled, that he had made a difference. Then she had been ripped away so suddenly that Severus hadn't had the chance to panic over it, only grieve the loss. Here with Harry, things were so different. It was like his worst nightmare playing out.

He stared at the unnaturally pale face of the child trying to force his normally calm and practical brain to formulate a plan. He summoned a set of his emergency potions and tore through the bag like a madman, scattering vials all across the floor until he came to a pale green one.

Severus hadn't even realized he had been murmuring to the boy, pleading with him to wake up.

"Come on Harry. Keep breathing," he begged hoping the boy would follow his command as he pulled Harry up to elevate his head.

The teens' eyelids fluttered open for a second and Severus exhaled a breath he didn't even realize he had been holding.

"Harry," he whispered in relief. "You have to swallow this," he said, pressing the vial to the boy's lips and tilting it back.

"And this," he said, quickly casting the first vial aside once it was empty and scooping up another of deep midnight blue. He'd only taken his eyes off Harry's face for a split second, but it was enough time for the boy's eyes to close. The cool liquid hitting his tongue reawakened him however and Severus felt himself exhale another sigh of relief.

After doing as told and swallowing both potions, Harry slowly let his eyes fall shut again and Severus faintly heard him whisper, "Sorry."

"Don't be ridiculous Harry, you have nothing to be sorry for," he answered back softly, but after a few minutes, the boy's eyes did not reopen.

"Harry?" Severus questioned with renewed panic, his voice trembling more than he would ever admit.

Another thought struck him and he quickly conjured a small oxygen ball around the boy's mouth and nose, but still he didn't stir.

"Harry, please wake up," he begged again, holding the child close to him. The potions should have helped clear out his lungs and open his airways. Was there something else wrong?

Severus frantically ran through the ingredients he assumed Harry had combined incorrectly, and the resulting toxic gas that would have occurred. If his predictions were correct, the phytolacca that he had left on the counter, introduced to an ordinary sleeping potion, would have caused the thick gas he had seen in the lab. The toxic vapors would have quickly filled the boy's lungs, hindering his breathing, causing his airways to constrict and burning his pharynx on the way down. But the potions he gave him should have helped to correct that and prevent any further damage.

If he hadn't been so irrational with fear he would have noticed that Harry's breathing had evened out, but his thoughts were interrupted by Poppy calling his name.

"Severus?" she shouted from the foyer, instantly picking up her pace once she spotted them.

He craned his neck to meet the Mediwitch's eyes and silently pleaded with her to do something, unable to form any words. He still sat with one arm wrapped protectively around Harry while the other hand carded through the boy's hair.

"What happened?" she demanded even as she already had her wand drawn and began running diagnostic spells. She managed to keep her composure spectacularly as she listened to her colleague stutter for the first time in as many as twenty years.

"I – he-" Severus shook his head as he took a deep breath.

"Severus, what happened?" Poppy repeated as she slowed her wand movements and turned her attention more towards him than Harry.

"I believe he mistakenly used powdered root of phytolacca in a Dreamless Sleep Potion instead of powdered root of asphodel." The Mediwitch's eyes widened as he continued. "I found him unconscious and his breathing was labored."

"Did you give him anything?" Poppy demanded, her eyes darting back and forth from the scattered potion vials to the potion master's eyes.

"An instant acting anti-inflammatory and a general antidote."

Poppy's face immediately softened in relief as she gazed at Severus, but his eyes were still wild with fear.

"Poppy, do something," he begged. "He won't wake up."

"Severus," she said softly, laying a hand on his shoulder. "You administered the correct potions. His vitals look good and he is stable, but his body has been deprived of oxygen. Why don't we get Mr. Potter to a bed where he will be more comfortable?"

Severus stared at his colleague dumbly.

"Severus," she snapped, finally breaking through his shock. "It will be a rough couple days for Mr. Potter, but he is stable right now. Let's move him to a bed and I will finish checking on him."

He finally gave her a sharp nod and stood, scooping Harry up with him. The weight of the fifteen year old boy didn't faze him as he quickly and carefully led the way up to Harry's bedroom.

After situating the boy on the bed, Severus stepped back to allow Poppy to work. He watched with a million thoughts flooding through his head that even his Occlumency shields couldn't hold. Harry's face looked so unnaturally pale and his lips were tinted blue. What if he had been deprived of too much oxygen?

He'd worried about Harry in the past whenever the boy managed to find trouble and near death, but now, this feeling was entirely new to Severus. It was as if a piece of him was being ripped out. The part he thought he had long since buried back when Lily died.

The last he had spoken with Harry could only be characterized as an unpleasant conversation, leaving Harry to think that Severus was angry with him. And now… Severus tried to shut his mind off from going in the direction of all the horrible outcomes that could befall the boy. He just simply couldn't think about losing him.

"Severus," Dumbledore said softly, laying a hand on his arm cautiously, almost reassuringly.

He hadn't even noticed the elder wizard had arrived, as he was so wrapped up in his own thoughts and fears watching Harry lying so listlessly on the bed with Madame Pomfrey bustling around him.

Severus found he could only nod his head in one sharp movement in reply to the headmaster. His gaze remained locked on Harry's face, wishing more than anything to see the boy's eyes open, even though he knew logically that the potions they had administered at this point would not allow it.

He could hear Madame Pomfrey and Dumbledore conversing in hushed tones next to Harry's bed, but all that registered was a dull hum. Rather than join them, he stood rooted to his spot, wanting nothing more than to pull up a chair as close as humanly possible to the boy, but also feeling unworthy of such a position.

This was his doing in more ways than one. His actions had driven Harry to the potions lab. Weasley had made that very clear. And he had carelessly left out all those ingredients, not properly stored or labeled, breaking one of the first rules of a potion master.

It was all like one terrible nightmare and Severus was so frustrated with himself for having no idea what to do. He ripped his eyes away from Harry and in one swift movement, exited the room, drawing his wand as he went.

-SS-

Albus had come as quickly as he could after receiving Snape's frantic Patronus saying Harry was injured. He knew Severus could handle most anything and wouldn't have called him unless the situation was dire. He had spotted the scattered potion vials when he entered the foyer and quickly made his way to the second floor in search of Harry's bedroom.

He had been right in his assumption and found Severus standing like a ghostly presence on the perimeter of the bedroom as Madame Pomfrey worked her magic over Harry. The boy was extremely still and he didn't want to interrupt the Mediwitch, but after three failed attempts to reach Severus, Albus was left with no choice in order to receive answers.

While Poppy was explaining what she knew of the potions accident and Harry's condition, Albus tried to keep an eye on Severus. The potion master's eerie silence and heavy breathing indicated how disturbed by the incident he really was. And then he tore from the room without a word.

Albus didn't need to hear the spells to know that Snape was expending a large amount of magical energy. He only hoped he didn't injure himself in the process.

-SS-

Severus let out a long shuddering breath that shook his whole frame before letting his head fall back. He caught a glimpse of a black scorch mark from one of his angry spells marring the white ceiling before he closed his eyes and rubbed a weary hand across his face. With his own silencing spell up, he was startled by Dumbledore's hand on his arm for the second time that evening.

He had put the hallway back in order aside from that one scorch mark, but there was no point in pretending the headmaster didn't know what he had been doing. The elder wizard knew him too well.

"Severus, Poppy tells me Harry seems to be in the clear although it will be a couple weeks before his health is restored completely. If not for your quick thinking, he may have sustained much more permanent damage," Dumbledore explained.

"And if not for my actions, the boy wouldn't even be in this situation," Severus ground out.

"Perhaps you could explain the incident in more detail and allow me to be the judge," Dumbledore said more calmly.

Severus didn't even register Albus' words. Instead he started to pace back towards Harry's door before changing his mind at the last minute and retracing his steps. Guilt had been a driving force in his life for so long that it came naturally to him now. After years of torturing himself with Lily's death, seeing Harry lying so lifeless was destined to just add fuel to that fire.

Abruptly he squared off to face the headmaster, adopting a stony face.

"Would you prefer we move him to the hospital wing or Grimmauld Place?" he asked seriously, trying not to let any of his pain show at the thought of relinquishing the boy.

"If you believe I don't see what you're trying to do, Severus, you really are slipping," Dumbledore returned in an equally serious tone.

Snape merely squared his jaw and tilted his chin higher. "Someone will need to notify Black."

"That will be unnecessary at the present moment. Poppy has already explained to me that it may be a few days before Harry regains consciousness, what with the potions he has been dosed with and the prolonged exposure to the fumes from the Dreamless Sleep Potion, but he is out of immediate danger. You're perfectly qualified to care for him and thus there is no reason to move him. Notifying Sirius would also be unnecessary until Harry is up for visitors. So please explain to me how the accident occurred and yes, it was an accident," Dumbledore said in a stern tone.

Severus had been trying his best not to lose his temper and keep his obvious anxiety a bit more guarded, but Albus' comment of 'immediate danger' pushed him over the edge.

"My carelessness caused the accident," he snarled. "The boy should be under the care of someone more fit to watch a teenager."

He wanted to continue shouting at the Headmaster but managed to clamp his jaw shut. He actually wanted to just sink to the floor and cry, but tears were simply something Severus did not indulge in. He'd been trying to deny, even to himself, how much he had started to care for Harry, but this situation was forcing all the feelings to the surface and he had no idea what to do with them.

He wanted to be in there taking care of the boy, but he didn't know if he deserved it. Even Black probably wouldn't have let something like this happen. He had left a poisonous root just lying around the lab unlabeled.

"Severus, why was Harry brewing alone?" Dumbledore asked, his blue eyes piercing Severus until the potion master had to look away.

It took a few moments of silence before Severus finally answered. "He believes I'm displeased with him and was trying to get back into my good graces by brewing potions for me."

"Ahh," Dumbledore hummed thoughtfully while tapping a long finger to his lips. His tone sounding as though all the puzzle pieces finally made sense and Severus snapped his eyes back to glare at the older wizard. He hated the way his mentor implied that he could always read Severus' emotions. Although, truth be told, he probably could.

"Enough!" Severus snarled after another bout of silence had stretched on. "So, not only did I drive him to the lab in the first place, but I also left out an unlabeled ingredient! A very poisonous ingredient! I'm not only an incompetent guardian, but also a brewer unworthy of the title of Potion Master!"

Severus swung away from the Headmaster, breathing heavily and trying to reign in his temper. He hadn't intended to rant in self pity, but Albus Dumbledore always knew how to bring out the worst in him. He paced a few steps away and gazed down the long hallway and out the window at the end. The bright sunlight sparkling in was such a contrast to Severus' mood that he would have much preferred to see it pouring.

He could feel more than hear the Headmaster approaching and let his eyes fall shut trying to gain some sort of clarity.

"Severus, don't allow jealousy and the idea of unworthiness to cloud your judgment and hinder your ability to see what is right in front of you," Dumbledore said softly.

"The boy doesn't need me," Severus answered in defeat, finally admitting the heart of the matter.

"You and I both know that isn't true, but even more important is what he wants, and Harry's actions today go a long way in illustrating that."

Severus didn't know how to respond. Yes, he had thought of that earlier. Why would the boy go to such lengths to rectify their relationship? Could it possibly mean what Severus hoped? He swallowed around the lump forming in his throat as Dumbledore began speaking again.

"He's only a child and one who has been hurt far too many times, something you can easily relate to," he said, coming up to stand next to Severus and staring out the window as well. "This is your chance, Severus, your chance to get it all back and so much more. But you will need to make the next step."

Severus stayed silent, unable to come up with any sort of reply.

"Or, at the very least, do not abandon that child when you are one of the few people he has come to trust so deeply," Dumbledore added after a moment.

Severus wanted so badly to seize the headmaster's first suggestion, but he knew for certain he had to agree to the second at the very least. He gave a swift sharp nod of acknowledgement and felt some of the tension clouding his brain slowly ease away. He had made this promise once before during the summer and he let it slip. This time he would make good on it and support Harry through everything he needed, no matter what it would cost him in the end.

"Thank you for coming so quickly, Albus," Severus said as he made his way to Harry's room.

"Call on me for anything," the headmaster replied. "Oh, and Severus, there really is no need to notify Sirius, yet. Allow Harry to make that decision once he wakes."

Severus had paused at the boy's door and turned to give Albus a quick nod of agreement. Harry needed his full attention and time to rest. The obvious fight that would ensue with Sirius Black was not necessary at the moment. Only the ill child inside this room mattered and with that thought in mind Severus crossed the threshold.

-SS-

TBC…

Thanks for being so patient everyone! My readers and reviewers are the best!

-Mara