A Little Too Much. Chapter 36

"Lets love and risk it all, lets love just a little too much.."

Every time I think about having a family with Zak, it worries me. No, not because of him leaving on his investigations for a week straight, not even the fact that he is gone most of the time. Or the fact that his crazy ex-girlfriends like to come around and threaten me. The only thing I was most afraid of , is something following him home. Some spirit gets an attachment to him, and follows him home. That spirit attack myself, or my baby. Either one at that, would kill Zak. I never would want Zak to give up ghost hunting - that's his passion, his career. I wasn't even going to think about telling him to quit. But, honestly. I think deep down, Zak knew his career was coming to an end.

The whole vacation with Zak was a complete wonderful experience. I couldn't have asked for a better experience honestly. It was amazing. It was just Zak and I. Me and Zak. It was so fun and quiet. Until 2 days after we were there, Zak got a call from Nick.

"Dude, we got a investigation. She is only okay with us doing it tonight. We have to go do it. It's a big deal. You'll love it." Nick said as soon as Zak picked up the phone, not even giving Zak the moment to say 'hey' or 'hi'.

"I can't go, Nick. Riley and I are on vacation and I just can't le-"

"Please dude! Just this once! I'm sure Riley will understand! It's for your job!"

"Nick, I just can't leave."

"Please Zak! Dude! Let us do this! Just this once!" Nick was begging. Zak looked at me, his eyes excited for the opportunity - but, he didn't want to leave me. He knew this trip meant so much. I knew this investigation would mean a lot to him. I shrugged, and plastered a fake smile on my face.

"It's okay," I said to Zak, "you can go. Go ahead." Zak's lips turned into a big smile.

"Yeah, She said it was okay. I can go. When are you leaving?" Zak said into the phone, his lips never leaving the goofy smile that was plastered on his face.

I left the room then; I wasn't angry because he was going – I couldn't be angry – because I was the one who gave him permission to go. I went into the bedroom – and I laid down on the bed, curling up in a ball – holding back tears. My emotions were getting the worst out of me – and nearly spinning me out of control when I defiantly didn't want them to.

I cried.

I didn't want to , a natural emotion is what was coming on and I was bawling. I wasn't actually too sure why I was crying, I didn't necessarily have a reason to. I just needed to. Everything was coming down, I didn't want Zak to leave – but I didn't want him to think I thought his job was a nuciense.

I heard the door open, and I shoved a pillow into my face and wiped my eyeliner run off my face. "Riley?" Zak's soft voice said as his body sunk in the bed beside me. "Are you okay?" I didn't answer, I simply laid there – not talking. "Riley, I won't go if you don't want me to."

"No," I sniffled, "I want you go to. Go, Leave."

Zak shifted on the bed, and he gently pulled the pillow from my face.

"Don't cry. Riley, why are you crying? I don't understand." Zak said to me, his eyes filled with confusion.

"I'm not crying," I whispered, trying to disguise my voice. Zak laid next to me, his face inches from mine.

"Your crying," He whispered, gently pulling from the pillow from my face. "Why are you crying? I won't go if you don't want me to."

"No!" I said a little too loudly. "I want you to go! I just.." I mumbled the next words so quietly, I didn't even hear myself say them. Zak stared at me, his eyes morphing into mine. My eyes covered in tears, my emotions taking over me. I shook my head at him, and I tried my best not to let him see me cry. I attempted to cover my face with the pillow again – but Zak refused to allow me to do so.

"Stop crying, what's wrong? I'm confused.." Zak said to me, shaking his head. "I'll call Nick. I didn't want to go anyways.." Zak picked up his iPhone from his pocket and went to call Nick.

"no!" I yelled taking his phone and ending the call, "I want you to go! Go!" Zak looked at his phone, then back at me, and to his phone – then back at me.

"But, your acting like you don't want me to go! Riley, tell me what you want!" Zak demanded from me, his eyes filled with confusion, his voice filled with anger. "Tell me!"

"I want you to stop!" I blurted out, my lips quivering.

"Stop what?" Zak asked me, his eyes confused, his jaw tight.

I thought for a second, realizing what I said my eyes got big. "Baby, stop what?" Zak whispered to me, "Please, just tell me."

"Ghost hunting." I whispered, "i mean, I don't want you to stop – I just, I.. I-I, I'm just afraid that.. uh..." I shuddered, my jaw quivering even more. Zak stared at me, not speaking. His jaw tightened and his chest moved in uneven patterns as he stared at me. I knew he would get angry over this. Could I expect anything more? Ghost hunting was his life – and I'm telling him to quit doing it. How could I be so ignorant to completely forget that he loved this more then life its self.

"Why?" Zak asked, his jaw relaxing, "Why do you want me to quit?" He looked at me as his chest began moving normally again, his anger passing as he began being calm and sweet again, "What did my hunting ever do to you? Are you hurt? Did something follow me home? Please.. Riley, tell me."

"No, It didn't do anything to me yet. I'm not hurt. Nothing followed you home that I know about.. and I.. I'm afraid that after we have this baby.. Something will, I don't know, maybe get jealous? Maybe try to kill him or her. Zak, We don't know what these ghosts are capable of."

Zak stared at me, "They won't hurt our baby.." Zak smiled at me, but my frown stayed plastered on my face, "They won't.. i know they wouldn't.. I help them."
"Zak! You don't know that! You don't know they won't eventually hurt YOU or OUR child. Zak do you not understand that?! When will you get that just because you might occasionally help them, means they will completely put it off that you have a baby. What did you say to me before Zak? Let me rephrase," I cleared my throat, and I began talking again, "Over half of possessions are in baby's." Zak stared at me as I talked, his mouth slightly opening – listening to every word I was saying, and getting mad at me, and sad at me.

"Baby, they won't.. I p-"

"You can't promise anything to me!" I yelled at him angrily. Zak stood up and walked out of the room. I laid on the bed, and thought about what just happened. Was I wrong? No. I couldn't be. Zak didn't understand that just because they haven't harmed him in a bad, bad, bad way. Doesn't mean they won't try with our child. Maybe if he got his head out of his ass then he would see that!

I don't know how long I laid in that bed for. But, when I woke up – the Cabin was silent. And a lone note sat on the nightstand.

I left for the lockdown.

We can talk when I get home.

Love you.

-zak.

So much for talking.

Can you say late? Omg. I'm soooooo sorry about this chapter! I've been so busy because I've been doing poorly in school latly, so much drama with dumb people, and I'm just trying to patch things up. But on a good note, my cusion rebecca is up here for good, and Im on spring break! Expect more chapters! :D

-Sabrina3