Disclaimer: I don't own the mentalist and I make no money from this

Author's Note: 100+ reviews! Wow I cannot believe it, seriously thanks so much! Glad to know you like this story :) This chapter is way longer than it should be but I don't think you'll mind. Special thanks to Dr Kevorkian, tigerlily 124, No more darkness (well done for reading 36 chapters in one go!), jisbon-sessed and jisbon 14 for reviewing :)

I took a deep breath before leading the Lisbons into the hospital, they stayed in the waiting room while I found my way to my Dad's room. To my immense relief he was now propped up in bed grumpily flicking TV stations. I let out a relieved breath as I saw him. I walked over to his bed and he finally glanced at me.

"Well hello Pat, nice of you to finally make an appearance," he announced in his usual manner.

"Hi Dad," I muttered nervously, "how are you feeling?"

"How do you think?" he snorted in reply, "some psycho maniac stabs me and now I'm stuck in a bleedin' hospital!"

"At least your alive," I mumbled quietly.

"Pat, don't be so melodramatic," he snapped irritably rolling his eyes at me, "if I wanted to die I'd be dead wouldn't I?"

"Why are you so mad at me? If I hadn't found you then you would be... dead," I answered feeling slightly hurt he was being so mean to me when I was just pleased he was alive.

"I'm mad at you Pat because some bloody fed was talking to me, he accused me of abusing you and then said he thought you were the one who stabbed me!"

"You don't really think I stabbed you?" I exclaimed in shock, his face was expressionless as he studied me.

"Did you?" he said eventually.

"No! I came home and found you like that, I swear. You really think I'd attack you? You're my Dad, I love you," I answered tearfully, not bothering to mask my hurt. How could he think I'd stab him? He looked carefully at me for a minute before sighing.

"I know Pat, you're not the violent type. I'm tired, I think I'll sleep now," he added.

"You're tired?" I muttered bitterly half to myself, he didn't even know the meaning of the word. When was the last time I'd slept? I shook my head as I went to say goodbye to him but he was already snoring loudly. Sighing I rejoined the Lisbons.

"Is he okay?" asked Teresa conversationally.

"He seems much better," I answered and forced a smile, "he's be back to his old self in no time."

"You mean angry and cruel and will hit you some more?" Chris inquired innocently.

"Chris! Be nice okay?" Teresa snapped immediately defensive.

"If I be nice will Patrick cook us meatloaf for dinner?" he replied just as sweetly and I couldn't help chuckle slightly.

We were soon on our way to their house. It felt good to be back there as I started on the meatloaf as was Chris' request. I enjoyed the playful banter with Teresa, I had really missed this and thankfully I did actually manage to prevent her from burning anything.

"Yummy meatloaf Patrick!" Chris informed me happily.

"Yeah, when Teresa cooks you're lucky if it's not burnt," James agreed.

"I was partially afraid I would die of food poisoning," added Matt.

"Okay, okay, I get it my cooking sucks can we not make a big deal of it?" moaned Teresa causing us all to laugh. Yes I had definately missed this.

Chris volunteered to do the dishes and James wisely offered to help him, just to make sure there was some dinner plates left for tomorrow. Teresa and I worked on our homework, by worked I mean she gave me the answers because I was too tired and distracted to focus. How could I concentrate with John...?

"You really are tired Patrick," Teresa stated as we put our books away.

"Yeah, I really am beat," I agreed and we both flinched at the word, I was still sore too, "I should probably be going home."

"Won't it be taped off by cops?"

"Err... yeah actually..." I mumbled in agreement, "what am I going to do now?"

"Don't whine Patrick you can stay here of course," she informed me brightly with a smile.

"Thanks Teresa, you're the best," I said also smiling, my grin became sly as I added, "well except at cooking."

"Patrick!" she moaned as we exploded into gales of laughter.

"What you guys laughing at?" asked Chris from the doorway, tilting his head curiously to one side.

"Oh nothing Chris," Teresa answered swiftly, "come on let's get you ready for bed," she told him getting up and leading him away.

I stood up and stretched while she was gone before wandering out of her room and aimlessly about the house. James was in his room, strecthed out on his bed as he listened to music while reading a comic. Matt was also in his room, sitting at his desk playing with little toy soliders. I envied them in a way, my Dad never allowed me comics or toys.

I continued my drifting and found Chris snuggled comfortably into his bed, Teresa sat beside him reading him a bedtime story. I leaned against the door frame and listened to her voice telling the exciting tale of Green Eggs and Ham, I hadn't heard it since kindergarten.

I hated kindergarten, not only did it mark my first days in school it marked the first time my Dad had seriously beaten me. It was also the start of teasing children as they mocked me spitefully for lack of money or for having a girl's name, whatever took their fancy. By the time they accepted me, we moved. The same thing happened in the next school, and the next and the next. I'd given up on friends by the second grade.

I sighed as Teresa continued the tale, it made me think of Angela. She'd mentioned she always read her youngest son a bedtime story, she'd really loved her kids. I wondered if I'd still be friends with Teresa if she hadn't have died. So many things to consider, so many worries. Maybe that was why I found it so hard to sleep. I smiled as a memory floated gently towards me.

My Mom held me closely, rocking me gently as she walked up and down. She was singing softly, her musical voice sounded magical as she sang me `Hush, Little baby.`I was half asleep as she gently sang the words.

"What?" she said suddenly half laughing, my Dad was in the doorway beaming at her. He looked so young and carefree, his clothes were clean and his hair combed. He actually looked presentable for once.

"Nothing," he answered simply as he continued to smile at us.

Teresa finished the story and kissed Chris goodnight, I slipped away back into her room and slumped to the floor. I put my hands in my pockets and remembered John'd note, I pulled it out and re-read the words already imprinted into my mind. Teresa appeared a few minutes later with a sleeping bag, she threw it in front of me. I was so engrossed in the note, I didn't notice her swiping it from my grasp until it was too late.

"Teresa give it back!" I cried but she was already reading the note. I watched as her smile faded to a look of absolute horror.

"Oh my god, Patrick. R-red John was the one..." she stuttered in shock as she too sank to the floor beside me, "he killed Sam's family."

"He said..." I was going to be honest with her I decided as I forced the words from my mouth, "his foster siblings picked on him and the baby cried at night... he said they deserved it for bothering him and he Sam's Dad would have tried to stop him."

"That is just... and Mick because of his insults," Teresa mumbled numbly as she absorbed the information, "he killed his own mother and so many others..."

"I know! It's a total nightmare and in his twisted mind we're friends, he thinks he's protecting me."

"How long have you known?"

"That he's a murderer? Awhile. That he attacked my Dad? Not until I saw the note when I tried to call for help."

"Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"Who would believe me? Would they think I had something to do with it?"

"They already think you have something to do with it!" she protested, "why didn't you tell me?"

"You were sort of mad at me," I explained.

"Before that?"

"I hoped I was wrong... would you even have believed me? Besides I was scared. Now I'm even more scared," I added as an afterthought and silence descended.

"Goodnight," called Matt as poked his head through the door, we muttered goodnight back and he left.

"Does everyone usually go to bed this early?" I wondered absently.

"Dad's less likely to beat us," she said simply and then sighed, "do you remember when you were a normal kid? A few months ago my only worries were homework, being embarrassed by my brothers, that I didn't have any best friends... remember those days?"

"No."

"Whereas now... I have to take care of my brothers, protect them from my Dad, worry about Red John..."

"I'm sorry," I told her guiltily, "if you'd never met me your life would still be normal."

"Don't talk like that Patrick," she informed me seriously, "I don't regret meeting you."

"Night Tess, Patrick," James said from the doorway before moving away.

"We should probably be going to bed too," Teresa muttered, "unless we want fresh bruises."

She grabbed her PJs and left the room, presumably to go get changed. I rolled out the sleeping bag and stripped to my undies, I didn't have any PJs with me or a change of clothes come to think of it. Teresa reappeared as I wriggled into the sleeping bag, she turned off the light and clambered into her oen bed.

"What are we going to do Patrick? About Red John?" she whispered into the darkness.

"Worry about it in the morning," I replied sleepily, my eyelids drooping.

"Did you brush yout teeth?"

"I don't have a toothbrush with me."

"Use mine."

"But I'm comfy," I moaned drowsily shifting into a more comfortable position.

"Fine let your teeth rot."

"Fine I will."

I heard her giggling in the darkness and I smiled before my exhaustion finally took me, dragging me down into a dreamless sleep...

*****

I was awakened as I felt something jabbing my in the back. Groaning I rolled to see Chris poking me with a toy sword.

"Yes?"

"Tessie says it's time to get up," he informed me brightly, "so get up!"

I groaned again as he scampered off. Sighing I forced myself to get dressed, it was actually hard considering myself wanted to climb back into that lovely peace. I was still tired but at least I had actually slept for once. I joined the Lisbons in the kitchen for breakfast, ceral. I was surprised to see a hungover Dan also eating some ceral. They were all seated already at the table, but Teresa had saved me the seat beside her.

"Who are you?" growled Dan glaring at me.

"Patrick Jane, I'm Teresa's friend. We met befor-"

"Yeah, I remember," he continued without removing his frosty stare, "why are you eating breakfast with my family?"

"I invited him for a sleepover," Teresa put in defensively.

"Cuz his Dad's in hospital," added Chris bravely, Dan just grunted and we resumed our silent breakfast.

Well silent except for Dan's groans of pain from his hangover. Bastard, I thought, he was annoyed by a little headache when he had hospitalized his five year old son by beating him half to death with a fire poker! I'd never had a hangover but it had to be pathetic in comparison.

"Is your Dad called Alex?" Dan demanded suddenly.

"Err... yeah."

"I know him, met him at the bar a couple of times. Guy's a total jerk!" snapped Dan then moaned and clutched his head, "what did I do to deserve this?"

"You got drunk," I informed him. His eyes immediately snapping up to resume glaring silently at me with those stones of hatred he had for eyes.

We finished our ceral as fast as we could and then almost ran out of the house for school. We walked for the most part in silence, we dropped off her brothers but still arrived on time. Grace and Wayne were already there, sitting on the wall holding hands again.

"They're good together," Teresa observed.

"Yeah," I agreed, she was right.

"Ever think of asking anyone out?" Teresa inquired giving me a weird look I was not accostumed to.

"No," I scoffed and she rolled her eyes at me, "why? Do you?"

"Sometimes," she shrugged walking over to them. I felt an odd surge of jealousy as I followed her, why was I jealous? We were just friends after all, best friends. I should be happy for her if she wanted a boyfriend. But I wasn't.

"Who?" I half asked, half demanded.

"Oh no one in particular," she answered slyly, I could tell she was lying.

"What are we talking about?" Kimball questioned bluntly as he completed our group.

"Teresa's crush," I said as calmly as I could, who did she have a crush on? I had to know, "so who?"

"I do not have a crush on anyone!" Teresa protested.

"Just someone," Grace announced ignoring Teresa's protest as they looked at me curiously.

"Why, jealous?" grinned Wayne.

"No!" I protested feeling my cheeks going red, "just curious..."

Luckily I was saved by the bell and they seemed to have dropped the matter by recess. I found it easier to concentrate on my lessons today now I felt more sure about my Dad being okay. I was still curious about Teresa's crush though. The rest of the day passed unevently, unless you count them giving me food again as eventful.

After school Teresa and I picked up her brothers again before heading straight to the hospital again. They waited in the waiting room while I went to see my Dad. I went to the same room but it was empty. I felt my heart clench painfully. My Dad wasn't there...