Disclaimer: I do not own CSI:NY. I wish I did. The characters belong to CBS. The ones invented by me are completely fictional.
Summary: Danny Messer's life is in danger. The past even he had forgot isn't a secret anymore, neither is the future he doesn't want to embrace. Danny/Don friendship. Set some months after Snow Day. No season four. Please read and review.
Warning: Rated for violence and mature references.
"Good to see that your sense of humor is intact.", Flack looked at him, amused.
"Yeah... I'm a pretty tough guy.", Danny smirked and looked at the door as they heard a knock.
"Danny... Oh, you have company... Do you need anything? How's the pain?", Georgia asked from the door, looking briefly at Flack and then focusing on Danny again.
"I'm fine, Georgia. Pain is bearable right now. No need to worry. I'll call if anything changes, okay?", Danny smiled.
"I come here to give you my attention... I mean, medical attention... and all I get is a shoo?", Georgia pouted.
"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to be rude...", Danny started.
"Oh, I'm joking, I know you didn't! But I'm starting to think Miss Monroe is a white lie. She's never around.", Georgia raised her eyebrows.
As the only answer Danny gave her was a shrug, Georgia added before closing the door: "Okay, then... I'll let you go back to your chat but the offer still stands if you get tired of waiting for this invisible woman."
"What was that all about?", Flack asked, laughing.
"She came on to me yesterday but I told her that I'm with Lindsay. Although this may be a lie, I'm not sure right now. As she pointed out, Lindsay hasn't been around. I tried to call her this morning but she didn't pick up. She's pissed.", Danny scrunched up his face.
"Well, you know women. When they say the three words to you, they want to hear it back.", Flack stated.
"Have you ever heard it?", Danny asked.
"Yeah, it happened.", Flack answered.
"Have you ever said it back?", Danny raised his eyebrows.
"Well... Yeah...", Flack nodded.
"During sex doesn't count...", Danny added hurriedly.
"Errrrr... So, no.", Flack admitted.
"See! Why am I going to say that if it's not how I feel? What does she want from me? A lie, so she can feel better? What's the point? I don't understand and I really don't want to think about it right now... Maybe it's better this way... You should've seen my ma talking. She's planning my wedding already!", Danny vented.
"You're exaggerating, Dan. Chill out.", Flack laughed.
"Yeah, whatever...", Danny shrugged. "Anyway Flack, I noticed that the talk about that scumbag didn't surprise you. You knew about that, didn't you? You also knew that Gennaro killed that bastard..."
"Yeah, your father told us - your mother, Mac and I - the day after your kidnapping. Tizanelli confirmed the story a bit after that.", Flack answered warily.
"So Mac knows too...", Danny sighed, pressing the bridge between his eyes.
"And Stell, Hawkes and Angell.", Flack completed, grimacing.
"What?! Why?", Danny exclaimed.
"Because they are your friends and were doing everything to find you. Mac thought they had the right to know. I didn't agree with his decision and we had an argument over it.", Flack explained.
"No one had the right to know, Flack... I endured that... and the fear... and the hurt... and the shame... and all the nightmares after that in silence, on my own, so no one would ever know. It took me so long to block it out and pretend it didn't happen. Couldn't it stay buried?", Danny let out.
"Well, we can't change what's done.", Flack lamented.
"I don't need you all pitting me.", Danny hissed.
"We aren't.", Flack answered in a tone he hoped was unwavering.
"Yes, you are! I saw it yesterday in your eyes, I see it now. I thought it was because of the tape but now I know it wasn't.", Danny retorted.
"Okay. I admit it. But you should also know that I admire you. I don't know if I would be able to deal with it, let alone on my own. When you feel like talking, I'm listening.", Flack assured him.
"I don't know... It's been such a long time... I never talked about it with anyone...", Danny sighed and looked up.
"Maybe will do you some good to open up. It's such a heavy burden to carry alone... If you don't feel comfortable talking about it to a friend, perhaps you could try a shrink.", Flack insisted.
"I don't need a shrink patronizing me, Flack! I hate to be analyzed!", Danny snapped.
"Okay... My mistake... Bad idea... But you must find a way to get over it.", Flack sighed.
"I got over it a long time ago, Flack.", Danny hissed.
"No, you didn't. You pretended it didn't happen, it's different. Have you noticed that you can't even say his name?", Flack looked straight at him and Danny averted his eyes.
After a while in silence, Danny spoke, still staring at a spot on the floor.
ShadowWolfDagger and ak-stinger,
Thank you once again for your reviews.
Hope you 'tune in' for the next chapter. It was very difficult to write, kept crying... I tend to suffer when Danny or Don go through a hard time and, being this story a drama, it happens a lot... I'm probably masochist...