Chapter 12: My Fault

"I'm so sorry, Aang," I said. New tears blurred my vision as blood came from my nose. I leaned on Sokka for support. His arm was under mine, and my arm was around his shoulder. My throbbing body wouldn't support itself so he helped. Aang was looking down, but I watched as the sadness on his face turned to anger. He turned to me with rage.

"How could you let them take Appa!" Aang shouted.

"I didn't. I tried to fight them off but there were too many!" I defended myself. I held on to my stomach as I felt an aching pain.

"You let them take Appa! I could have saved him! Why didn't you come, and get us? You're weak!" He yelled as he came closer. He was going to yell in my face when Sokka pushed him back.

"Leave her alone," Sokka said defensively.

"She tried, Aang. The sandbenders snuck up on…" Toph began, but was interrupted by Aang.

"You never cared about him! Did you?" Aang yelled, and it hurt to see him like this. As he yelled I felt ashamed that I couldn't do anything to stop the sandbenders. Before he could keep yelling at me Katara stood in front of him, and placed her hands on his shoulders.

"Aang, stop it. You know Toph and Alec did all they could. They saved our lives," Katara said trying to calm down her enraged friend. Aang looked at me with disgust.

"Who's going to save our lives now? We'll never make it out of here," Sokka said.

"That's all any of you guys care about, yourselves! You don't care whether Appa is okay or not!" Aang shouted and turned away.

"We're all concerned, but we can't afford to be fighting now. Especially Alec," Katara said, and tried reasoning him. He walk away a little, but when he stopped he popped open his glider. I curiously watch him as he turned his head to look at us. His expression was sharp and cold.

"If we die you can blame Alec. I'm going to go find Appa," He hissed. As soon as he said that it felt like I had been hit again. I couldn't believe the words came from his mouth. Aang turned his head away from us, and took a running start before flying away. Katara ran after him, but stopped where he had stood. She gazed out at the sky then turned to us.

"Alec let me heal you," She said taking out some water. I shook my head in protest.

"No, I'm fine," I protested.

"You're not fine," She argued coming closer.

"Katara we need that water to drink. I'll be okay for a while," I told her. She hadn't thought about that, and put the water back. She nodded her head in agreement.

"We'd better start walking. We're the only people who know about the solar eclipse. We have to get that information to Ba Sing Se," Katara said, and Sokka slowly took a step. He waited for me. We walk in sync, but the only problem was my burning side.

"What eclipse?" I asked, and groaned.

"There's an eclipse that will leave the firebenders powerless. It's called the darkest day in Fire Nation history. We need to get the information to Ba Sing Se" Sokka explained. I took a second to process this. I had never heard anything about that at school. Then again they wouldn't tell us anything that went against 'the greatest nation'. I looked down at the ground when I saw an odd blue. When we got closer I saw my other dagger. I touched my left side to feel on dagger, but the right one was gone.

"My dagger," I said pointing to it. Katara turned her head and saw it. She picked it up, and walked over to me. She gave it to me, and I put it back in my sheath.

"Thanks," I said gratefully. All we had now were the clothes on our backs. Clothes. I thought, and stopped walking.

"Are you okay?" Sokka asked at my sudden stop.

"Yeah," I said, even though I wasn't. We started walking again. I had just realized everything Appa was carrying was gone. Gone forever. My Dad's tunic was gone forever. I couldn't believe it. I didn't want to. My eyes started tearing up. That was the last thing I had to my family, and now I didn't even have it. I cursed myself for not wearing it. Instead I was wearing the stupid sleeveless Kyoshi warrior dress. I let a few tears fall, but refused to cry. We needed to get out of the desert, and crying wouldn't help.

We kept walking for a while, and we were all tired. My body hurt so badly, but I didn't complain. Aang was right it was my fault Appa was taken. So I shouldn't be whining. Aang had not shown up, but we knew he would find us. We didn't talk about it, but we knew. We didn't even talk. The sun was taking its toll on us. We were all sun burnt, and I could tell my friends weren't use to this heat. It was like summer in the Fire Nation. I was looking down as I felt something bump in to Sokka. I looked behind him to see Toph.

"Can't you watch where you're..."Sokka shouted in announce, but stopped when he comprehended who bumped in to him.

"No," Toph said bluntly.

"Right. Sorry," Sokka apologized embarrassed. Katara turned around to look at us.

"Come on guys, we've got to stick together," Katara encouraged.

"If I sweat anymore, I don't think sticking together will be a problem," Sokka said trying to use his free hand to detach himself from Toph. If he was that stuck to Toph I could only imagine how much we were attached.

"Katara, can I have some more water?" Toph asked. Katara popped open her water skin, and made four small orbs of water. She sent the water close to our faces, and we drank the water. As I drank my water orb I noticed it had a bitter taste due to the left over blood in my mouth. Other than that it was refreshing.

"We need to try to conserve it. Sokka put Alec down we need to rest a minute," Katara told him. We didn't need to be told twice. Sokka lowered me down to the sandy ground until I was sitting. He unhooked his arm from under mine, and when he tried to get away our clothes were stuck together. With some help from Toph she detached Sokka from me. I sat there feeling better that I wasn't on my feet.

"Look!" Sokka exclaimed, and pointed at a desert cactus. I looked at Sokka who unsheathed his machete. He slowly walked over to it, and cut off a piece. My eyes widened when I realized he was going to drink the liquid inside of it.

"No! Sokka, that will makes you crazy!" I yelled trying to warn him, but it was already in his system.

"What are you talking about? It's fine. There's water trapped inside these!" He said showing the cactus to us. We looked at him. He drank a few more cups before his eyes dilated. Then he rapidly started shaking his head.

"Sokka, you idiot," I said waiting for the effects to take total control. The first thing we learned at school; don't drink from a cactus, and if you didn't learn it at school it was just common sense. Something Sokka didn't have.

"Drink cactus juice. It'll quench ya! Nothing's quenchier," Sokka said, and started crawling on the sand. If the situation wasn't so serious I would have been laughing. When Sokka was going to take another drink she took it away from him.

"I think you had enough," Katara said throwing the cactus away, but then Sokka started pointing at us.

"Why is Toph on fire? Alec! Your legs are gone!" He yelled in his crazy state. I looked down at my legs, and sure enough they were still there. I knew Sokka wasn't going to be able to help me anymore, so I inhaled a sharp breath, and lifted myself up. I groaned as I tried to walk, but I only took a stepped. Katara saw me struggling and helped me.

"Can I get some of that cactus?" Toph asked. I was going to come back with a smart remark, but I was too tired.

"I don't think that's a good idea. Come on, we need to find Aang," Katara told us, and started walking. She tried helping me, but it was difficult. I was trying hard not to drag my feet, but the sand wasn't that easy to walk on. Toph was having just as hard as a time since she could hardly see anything at all. Sokka kept going on about how great cactus juice was, and I looked back at him every once in a while to make sure he didn't have any. I was surprise Katara was silent. She wasn't telling us what to do, but guiding us in the right direction. As we walked up another sand dune a warm breeze washed over us.

"What is that?" Katara asked looking behind her. I turned my head to see a huge mushroom shaped dust cloud.

"What? What is what? I can't see anything," Toph said.

"Of course you can't," I said trying to lighten the mood, but I guess Toph wasn't in the mood. She shot me a dirty look that told me to shut up.

"It's a giant mushroom! Maybe it's friendly!" Sokka chanted and waved his arms back and forth.

"Let's just keep moving. I hope Aang's okay..." Katara trailed off, and we started walking again, but as we walked I noticed Sokka was a little too close to me.

"Sokka can you move back please," I asked. I spoke slowly hoping he would understand me. The way his eyes were dilated told me he was still out of it.

"I hate bagermoles," He mumbled. That came out of nowhere. I thought to myself.

"What!?" Toph shrieked, and walked towards him.

"I hate them," Sokka said again. Toph looked raged at this.

"How could you hate them!? There the best earthbenders in the world," She argued. Sokka pointed a shaky finger at.

"I was so close to kissing Alec, but then. BOOM! They come out and ruin it!" Sokka shouted dramatically like I wasn't there. I stared at him with my mouth open. He wanted to kiss me? That's all that ran through my mind, but then I felt my stomach turn. I wasn't sure if it was from the beating I got or from Sokka's outburst, but I didn't feel good. Toph stopped and laugh out in hysterics. Katara was standing right next to me, and heard everything. Toph fell on her back still laughing.

"You were going to kiss Twinkle Twin?" Toph asked. Sokka nodded his head, and turned around. He saw me staring at him. He smiled and waved like I didn't hear anything. "I told you, Twinkle Twin he liked you."

"Shut up Toph. He's crazy right now," I said and tried to forget what I heard. Me and Katara started walking, and Toph picked herself of the ground. She dragged Sokka with her and kept laughing. The sun was going down when we saw a faint shadow over our heads. We looked up to see Aang. I felt a wave of relief. I thought he had gotten himself hurt or something. Aang landed close to us on his knees, but didn't move. Katara let go of me, and walked over to him. I settled myself on the ground to give my legs a break.

"I'm sorry, Aang. I know it's hard for you right now but... we need to focus on getting out of here," Katara softly said, and placed her hand on his shoulder.

"What's the difference? We won't survive without Appa. We all know it," Aang announced hopelessly. He looked down in despair, and grief.

"Come on, Aang. We can do this if we work together. Right Toph?" Katara said encouraging. Toph kicked the sand underneath her, and looked at her.

"As far as I can feel, we're trapped in a giant bowl of sand pudding. I got nothin'," Toph said.

"Alec? Any ideas how to find Ba Sing Se?" She asked me, and I looked at the sky.

"Constellation. It's almost night. If we can see the stars we can find north," I said lazily. I didn't have the energy to get up and start going again.

"And why should we trust you?" Aang snapped venomously. I looked down shutting my mouth. Aang was clearly still mad at me.

"Aang she's right. If we keep going until night we can use the stars," Katara pointed out, and went through a bag of Sokka's. She took out a piece of paper that looked like a map, but I didn't get to see what it was because she kept it closed. She then looked at all of us. I could tell by the look on her face we looked pathetic. I could barely walk, Toph could barely see, Aang was giving up on hope, and Sokka was high on cactus juice.

"Ugh... We're getting out of this desert, and we're going to do it together! Aang, get up. Everybody, hold hands. We can do this. We have to," Katara said in annoyance. I slowly stood, and Katara came over to help me. She held out her hand behind her, and everyone held on to each other. Even Sokka was holding on to MoMo's tail. We went off again to walk more, but as I walked I kept hearing voices.

"Alec," They called, but when I turned my head all I saw was sand. The sand swayed back and forth, and I knew it was from the heat. We walked a few miles until we saw the stars. When Katara gave us the okay to rest I didn't need to be told twice. I let myself fall on to the sand, but regretted it afterwards.

"Is there any more water?" Toph asked.

"This is the last of it. Everyone can have a little drink," Katara replied, and unscrewed her water skin. The water looked heavenly as she waterbent it out, but then MoMo leaped and jumped through it.

"Momo, no! You've killed us all!" Sokka scream dramaticly as he fell on his knees.

"No, Sokka," Katara calmly said, and bent the water from the sand.

"Bending," Sokka said in awe. Katara bent the water back in to her water skin and handed it to Toph. Toph took a sip, and handed it to me. I took a small sip, and handed it out to Aang. He looked up from the sand and turned to glare at me. My hand retreated, and I handed Katara back her water skin.

"Sokka, let me see the things you got from the library," Katara asked Sokka, but then he went in to hysterics. I ignored them, and laid my aching body on the sand. I sighed in relief. The weight was finally off my feet, and I could drift in to a deep sleep. I gazed out at the setting sun, and thought about nothing. My eyes closed slowly, but then I heard it again.

"Alec," I heard, and my eyes snapped open. I didn't dare lift myself from where I lay.

"Katara are you calling me?" I asked groggily.

"No just go back to sleep, Alec," Katara told me, and I started closing my eyes.

"Alec." The second time I lifted my head to see what it was. Faintly in front of me I saw a figure. The figure was far, and started walking towards us. I wasn't sure if I should tell Katara, but I was too tired. When the figure was closer I saw it was a teenager. I narrowed my eyes for a better, and noticed the teen was very familiar.

"Hey," I whispered. The teenager kept walking until he was in front of me. I couldn't see his face, but when he crouched down my eyes widened. "Zuko?"

Zuko kneeled right in front of me. Grey met amber as he stared down. I was expecting a displeased look on his face, but he looked peaceful as gazed at me. I was shocked to see him. The last time I saw him he was wearing a mask, but this time he wasn't. His black hair swayed in front of his face, and I tried to lift my hand to touch him.

"Wake up," He said softly, and I looked at him confused.

"Wake up," I heard again, but this time it was a different. I heard Katara's voice, and felt a light shaking. I opened my eyes to see Katara shaking me awake. I grunted as closed my eyes again. It was just a dream. I told myself, but it was actually a hallucination in my dream. Katara shook me again, and this time I kept my eyes opened. I propped myself on my elbows, and looked up at the sky. It was still night.

"Come on we need to go," She said, and moved over to Sokka. Sokka sat up, and smiled like a drunken idiot. Toph sat up, and smacked her lips.

"Yesterday my mouth tasted like mud. Now it just tastes like sand. I never thought I'd miss the taste of mud so much," Toph confessed. I looked over to Aang as he slept. Katara saw him, but as she was going to wake him he started moving.

"I'm awake. I couldn't sleep," He said, but didn't bother looking up or turning.

"Well, we need to get moving if we want to get out of this sand pit," Katara said, but as I was going to get up I saw a familiar figure in the sky.

"Appa!" Aang said joyed. I smiled, but when I noticed Appa didn't respond to Aang's voice I knew something was wrong. We waited for Appa to turn, but when he flew in front of the moon we saw clearer. It wasn't Appa, but a cloud.

"It's just a cloud," Katara said, and looked down, but then looked back. "Wait! A cloud! Here, fly up and bend the water from that cloud into my pouch."

Katara unhooked her water skin, and handed it to Aang. He scowled as he grabbed the pouch from her hand, and opened his glider. I watched as he flew towards the cloud, and in seconds the cloud was gone. Aang flew back down, and harshly gave Katara back her pouch. Katara opened it, and looked inside.

"Wow... there's hardly any in here," Katara pointed out disappointed.

"I'm sorry, okay! It's a desert cloud; I did all I could! What's anyone else doing?! What are you doing ?!" Aang snapped, and pointed his staff at her.

"Don't yell at her," I hissed. He turned to me, and looked down. I let out a sigh, and closed my eyes. "It's not her fault. If you're going to blame anyone, blame me. I couldn't save Appa. It's my fault."

"No it's not," Toph said, but I shook my head. I knew Aang had to blame someone, and if that was me then so be it. Before Aang could do anything Katara walked in between us.

"C'mon we need to keep going," She said. I stood, and Katara helped me walk. I was getting tired of needing help. I had to lean on her for support, because of my side. It burned and felt like I was being kicked all over again when I walked.

"Ow! Crud! I am so sick of not feeling where I'm going!" Toph yelled, and fell to the floor holding her foot. "And what idiot buried a boat in the middle of the desert ?"

"A boat?" Katara asked, and Toph pointed at the rock like object sticking out of the ground.

"Believe me, I kicked it hard enough to feel plenty of vibrations," Toph pointed out. I narrowed my eyes at the object and notice it was made of wood. Then Aang walked forward with his staff. He used his airbending to clear the area, and the boat was reviled to be a sand sailer.

"We can get out of the desert!" I cheered with a smile on my face. Katara unhooked her arm from under mine, and walked towards the sand sailer. I still wasn't that sturdy on my feet, so I sat down. Katara walked over, and climbed on to the platform of the sailer.

"It's one of the gliders the sandbenders use! And look! It's got some kind of compass on it!" She exclaimed. "I bet it can point us out of here! Aang, you can bend a breeze so we can sail it. We're going to make it!"

After a few minutes of getting everyone on to the sand sailer Aang stood in front of the sail, and blew wind to make it go. I offered to help, but Katara wouldn't let me. It was for the best. So instead I sat next to Sokka as he held on to MoMo's tail. I tried to take MoMo away, but Sokka held a firm grip. I sighed and gave up when I deemed it futile.

"The needle on this compass doesn't seem to be pointing north according to my charts," Katara said trying to get the compass to work.

"Just follow the map. It'll get us where we need to be," I told her. Katara looked at her map, and then straight ahead.

"That's what the compass is pointing to! That giant rock! It must be the magnetic center of the desert," She exclaimed pointing straight ahead.

"A rock!" Toph shouted happily.

"A rock?" I questioned.

"Maybe we can find some water there!" Katara said hopefully.

"Maybe we can find some sandbenders," Aang added darkly. I don't think he meant for anyone to hear him, but I did. Aang went faster in pursuit to get to the rock. When we did Aang stopped, and we slowly got off. I looked over to Sokka, and he looked more stable than he did an hour ago. He moved his head back and forth trying to tell where he was.

"Um… when did we get here?" He asked. He spoke clearer and sounded like normal Sokka.

"When you drank cactus juice," I told him as Katara helped me off. We walked in front of the wall. I turned my head to find an easier way to get up, but all I saw was a path way going up.

"Maybe I should stay down here," I said hesitant.

"The last time we left you, you got ambushed by sandbenders," Sokka pointed out, and looped his arm under my other one. Katara let go of me, and so Sokka could help be. He was sober now, but a little tipsy as we walked. We went up the path way and on to the large rock. Toph looked enthusiastic as she walked on her own element.

"Land!" Toph exclaimed as she let herself fall on to the ground. She then started moving her arms back and forth to make an earth angle. "Ahhh... Finally! Solid ground!"

"You really hate sand don't you?" I asked as me and Sokka stood in front of her. She nodded her head in response. Toph stood up, and we looked ahead of us to see a cave. It was odd, because this cave had a bunch of entrances. I just shrugged my shoulders, and walked with my friends. I gazed at the walls, and noticed the slim that came down like oozing snot.

"I think my head is starting to clear out the cactus juice. And look!" Sokka exclaimed and pointed at the slim. He was going reach out and get some until I pushed him back.

"Oh! No you don't," I told him. He pouted, and looked down.

"You've been hallucinating on cactus juice all day and then you just want to lick something you find stuck to the wall of a cave ?!" Katara scolded. Sokka couldn't shrug his shoulders since he was helping me walk, but tried.

"I have a natural curiosity," He answered.

"I don't think this is a normal cave. This was carved by something," Toph pointed out, but as soon as she did a strange buzzing accorded. A second later we were running out of the cave. Buzzard wasps came after us, and they didn't like they were in a good mood. We stood outside the 'cave' waited for their first move. These creatures were dangerous and we knew it. I used my arm that wasn't around Sokka, and reached for my dagger. My eyes looked to my friends, and Aang was the first one to make a move. He swung his staff in the air throwing the buzzard wasp back. The buzzard wasps saw the attack and did the same. Sokka tried to move me out of the way, but I stayed where I stood.

"Let go of me, Sokka," I told him, but I could tell he wasn't going to do it.

"No. C'mon," He said, but a stood my ground.

"I need to fight. I'm not going to let you guys do all the work," I snapped, but before he could say anything I unhooked my arm, and stood by myself. I shooting pain went up my right side. I gritted my teeth, and grabbed my daggers. One of the buzzard wasps noticed me, and attacked. I held my breath as I swung both of them in front of me. I felt as the blade swiped across the buzzard wasp's face. The buzzard wasp retreated, and I let go of my breath. The pain in my side made my legs buckle underneath me, but before I could fall Sokka caught me.

"Let's go," He said, and I didn't hesitate to follow him. I put the daggers back in my sheath, and followed him down the path we came from. We went as fast as we could, but that was difficult. When we were at the end of path sand rose from the ground, and sent the buzzard wasps flying. I gaped at the display of bending, but glared at the sand sailers that appeared. We walked down the path, and stood in front of them. I'm not sure when, but Aang came and joined us.

"What are you doing in our land with a sandbender sailer? From the looks of it, you stole it from the Hami tribe," The leader said.

"We found the sailer abandoned in the desert. We're traveling with the Avatar. Our bison was stolen and we have to get to Ba Sing Se," Katara tried reasoning, but I snarled and stepped forward. Sokka held on to me as I pointed at them.

"Sandbenders, Leave!" I repeated from yesterday. I saw the younger one by the leader flinch back. I smirked, because these were the same ones from yesterday.

"How dare you talk to us like that on our land?" The leader accused.

"I have a right to after you stole out bison, and our things!" I shouted at them.

"We did no such thing!" He argued, but I say the teenager next to him sweating a lot.

"Oh, really?" I said.

"You're accusing us of stealing your things when you stole ours?" The Leader shot back.

"Ask him," I said pointing at the person next to him. The leader looked at the teenager next to him questioningly.

"What is she talking about, son?" The father asked, but his son shook his head.

"I don't know, father," He said, but you could tell the deception in his voice.

"I recognize the son's voice. He's the one that stole Appa," Toph said surprisingly soft. Katara turned in her direction.

"How do you know?" She asked.

"Because he is," I said dropping my hand, but then the rage took over. "You and the other sandbenders beat me, and stuck me in the sand just to get Appa!"

"You said to take her, and put a muzzle on him," Toph added. Then it was Aang who spoke up.

"You muzzled Appa!?" He demanded, and aimed his staff at them.

"I'm sorry! I didn't know that it belonged to the Avatar!" The son pointed out, but it was too late. Aang was mad, and the rare hate in his eyes showed it. Aang swung his staff, and broke one of the sand sailers.

"Where is he?!" Aang demanded.

"I traded him! To some merchants! He's probably in Ba Sing Se by now! They were going to sell him there! Please! We'll escort you out of the desert! We'll help however we can!" The son pleaded, but it was too late. The air around Aang swirled, and his eyes rolled to the back of his head. A glowing appeared, and rose slowly from the ground. Sokka didn't hesitate to grab me and Toph, and start running the other way. When we were far enough I looked up at him in shock. I've seen him in the Avatar state before from anger, but this was different. It looked like he was out for bitter cold blood.

Aang destroyed the rest of the sand sailers except for the two behind him, and when he was going to come after the sandbenders Katara came out of nowhere, and grabbed his hand. She slowly pulled him back down, and as she did the air started to calm down. She pulled him against her, and brought him down to the ground. His eyes stopped glowing, and he cried in to Katara's tunic. Me, Sokka, and Toph slowly walked over to him, and Katara. I bent down, no matter how much it hurt, on my knees and placed my hand on his shoulder.

"It'll be okay, Aang," I said. Then to my surprise he jerked back like my touch was acid. I backed away. He wasn't going to listen to anything I had to say right now.

Thank you guys for your support, and reviews! :D

Don't think I don't notice, because I do.

Til next time

- Alec