It was the start of a new day. The sun had barely risen in the east, the pink glow at the edge of the horizon the only indication that daylight was coming. Tired of sitting around and doing nothing for three days straight, Miroku decided to leave the confines of Kaede's hut and stretch his legs for a little while. The houshi walked as swiftly as his still-wounded back allowed him, not stopping until he was deep in InuYasha's Forest, the ground crunching slightly as he tromped over dead branches and leaves. He leaned against a nearby tree and took in a lungful of air, grateful to be out of the stuffy confines of the hut. It wasn't that he didn't like any of the people in the hut-because he did-it was just that Miroku had been a rover for far too long to feel comfortable staying in one place for any length of time. Sooner or later his restless spirit would drive him on his endless quest to defeat Naraku and lift the curse that had plagued his family for over fifty years.
'Now is not the time to be resting,' Miroku thought, staring up at the light gray sky, brightening with the promise of dawn on the gently blowing breeze. 'Especially not since we know Kyūna-shi and Mujōna are on the move again. If they start slaughtering people while we sit here unprepared...' Miroku shuddered slightly at the thought. '...No. Too many people have died by their hands already. I don't want any more casualties.'
Unconsciously, his left hand started to trace the blue beads encircling the wrist of his cursed hand, feeling the smooth contours of each and every one pass beneath his fingers. 'If we manage to kill Mujōna...then my curse will be lifted once and for all. I will be free to live my life without the shadow of imminent death on the horizon.'
The houshi's thoughts slowly turned to what he would do after he was free of his curse. Unbidden, the image of Sango's sleeping face swam to the forefront of his thoughts, taunting him with its simple beauty. It had been a long time since her path and his had intersected, yet he never managed to stop feeling a little dazed at the emotions that coursed through his body whenever he thought of her. Sympathy when she was sad, jealousy when another man glanced approvingly in her direction, protectiveness when she was attacked...love. Love, simply and truly. When Miroku had told Sango that he had loved her, he had been telling the utmost of truths. Now, how to make her believe it?
"Houshi-sama? Houshi-sama!" Miroku was jerked out of his reverie as Sango's call echoed through the forest, tinged with worry as the sound of breaking branches started making itself known to the houshi. Apparently, Sango had woken up and seen that he wasn't there. Naturally, this would cause her to worry about him, which would lead to her searching for him.
"I'm over here, Sango," he called back, his voice bouncing off the trees as it reverberated back to her. There was a slight pause, then the frantic rustling of foliage told the houshi that the taijiya was making a beeline toward him. A few seconds later, Sango burst through the plants surrounding the tree Miroku had chosen to lean against. She was huffing and blowing like a bellows, her face red with rage.
"You baka houshi!" she bellowed, lurching forwards and seizing Miroku by the front of his robes, which he had done up shortly before leaving the hut. "You're still not healed yet; why did you go outside?"
Miroku smiled serenely at Sango, his amethyst eyes sparkling slightly. "My dear Sango, these wounds aren't as bad as you make them out to be. Thanks to Kaede-sama's excellent care, I am feeling much better than I was before. There is really no need to worry about me."
Sango's face went, if possible, even redder as she released Miroku and whirled away, hiding her face from view. "I-I wasn't worried," she denied weakly.
Miroku laughed softly as he placed one hand on Sango's shoulder. "Sometimes, dear Sango, you are just as defensive as InuYasha when it comes to your feelings."
Sango shuddered slightly when his hand made contact with his shoulder, but other than that she did not react. Miroku took this as a good sign to continue. "A few days ago I confessed my love to you, Sango...and yet you said nothing." His brow furrowed slightly as one of his least favorite possibilities bubbled up to the forefront of his thoughts. "Does that mean...that you do not return my feelings? I would...accept that, if it meant that you would be happy with someone else, dear Sango." Miroku let his hand drop away from Sango's shoulder, backing away from her, though his heart throbbed painfully with every motion he made. 'Has it always been so?' he wondered. 'Does thinking about her with another man always make me so sad?' The houshi thought back to the time when the lord of a castle had proposed marriage to Sango, professing to have loved her since his childhood days. Miroku had said that he wanted Sango to be happy, which was true, but he had also nursed a quiet sense of hurt all throughout that particular adventure. So maybe thinking about her with another man had always affected him this way.
"That's NOT it!" Sango shouted, whirling around unexpectedly, her eyes blazing with wrath. Miroku's thoughts instantly screeched to a halt as a pang of fear throbbed in his heart. When Sango was mad, the houshi was usually in for a world of pain. But...
"So...what is it then, dear Sango, that keeps you from returning my feelings?" he asked, his eyes sad. Sango's bottom lip trembled slightly when she looked into Miroku's deep amethyst eyes and saw the eternal loneliness that always lurked beneath the houshi's carefree attitude, the loneliness caused by living his whole life under the shadow of the Kazaana's curse and the knowledge that one day, out of the blue, he would die a horrible death.
"I...I..." Suddenly, the taijiya couldn't find the words she needed, wanted to say. She wanted to alleviate that horrible loneliness in his eyes, but couldn't find the words. 'Dammit! What can I say?' she thought wildly.
Miroku cocked his head at her, eyes sparkling as he regarded the blushing woman in front of him. "Why are you afraid, Sango?"
Sango jerked as if the houshi's words had delivered an electric shock to her body. "What? Me, afraid?" she squawked, blinking several times as if she had been blinded by a bright light.
"You see, I thought about a lot of possibilities when I realized that I loved you, but you kept your distance," the houshi continued, ignoring Sango's barely audible squeaks of protest. "The first I have told you already. The second I only just recently thought of, for which I apologize. If I truly love you, I should have more faith in your feelings." The houshi bowed slightly, never averting his eyes from hers. She mumbled something and shifted from foot to foot, but she didn't look away either.
"I think you're afraid to love me because of what happened at the village of the youkai-taijiya...what is still happening to Kohaku," he told her, his voice soft. "The situation with Kagome-sama isn't helping you either, I know that much. So...is this the reason you won't love me, Sango?"
Sango looked away now, her blush receding as her lovely brown eyes teared up. "I...If something happened to you, houshi-sama, I don't know what I would do. My people have died, my father's dead, I don't know where Kohaku is and now Kagome-chan might be going the same way as the rest of them." As the words tumbled out of Sango's mouth, her tears gathered in her eyes until the dam holding them back burst, sending two trails of diamond-bright liquid pouring down her face. "I...I just don't...I don't want..." Sango tried to say, but she found a large mass slowly moving up her throat, blocking off her words just when she needed to say them. She reached up and scrubbed wildly at her eyes, trying to stop the damn tears that still trailed down her face.
Miroku smiled softly and reached forward, seizing Sango's shoulders with both hand and pulling her gently against his chest, letting her face nestle in his dark robes. Not only did Sango not object, she threw her arms around his neck as she started sobbing, clinging to him like he was the only piece of driftwood in the tumultuous sea that was her heart and the emotions she tried so hard to contain within herself.
"Ah, dear Sango," the houshi sighed, letting one hand rise to stroke her soft hair, "How I wish you didn't ever have to cry." He thought for a second, feeling the taijiya's sobs slowing slightly as she calmed down, her breathing starting to even out. Then, when her sobs had reduced into small hiccups, he continued. "It's my fondest wish that I could try to protect what happiness you have...that I could try to give you what you lost so long ago-a home." The houshi's voice was quiet, but Sango heard every word as if he had shouted them.
"If...if you want to do that...then why do you flirt with anybody that has breasts and a pretty face?" Sango asked, a little suspicion creeping into her tone. Miroku just laughed and shook his head.
"Partially because that is the way I have lived my life until I met you, and partially because I wanted you to notice me...and I think it worked if it bothers you so much, don't you think?" The houshi's eyebrows waggled up and down suggestively as he spoke, the familiar perverted gleam entering his deep amethyst eyes when he did so.
"You-!" Sango glared at him, aware that a great weight was lifting off her chest as time went by. She was feeling better already and nothing significant had happened. Idly, she wondered if this was because she had told Miroku about her feelings, or, rather, Miroku had guessed about her feelings, and she had confirmed his suspicions.
Then, her thoughts rushed back to Earth with a bump as Miroku gently grabbed her chin, locking his eyes with hers. Her heart started pounding again, blood thrumming through her veins, mixing with adrenalin and driving her thought processes into absolute insanity. How could he do this to her?
"Dear Sango, what is your answer to my question?" he asked, all trace of teasing and humor gone now, replaced by seriousness and conviction. "Will you let me try to protect your happiness and give back what you have lost?"
Sango blinked, her breathing coming in faster and faster gulps of oxygen. "Is...are you...was that a proposal?" she managed to choke out, tears pricking at her eyes again, though the feelings in her heart were much different now.
Miroku's mouth quirked up into a small smile as his eyes positively glowed. "If that is what you want it to be, Sango," he told her, a slight laugh just barely detectable in his voice.
Sango gave a small gasp, then, abruptly, she started crying again. Later on, Miroku would feel rather proud of himself for not freaking out and demanding to know what was wrong (like, say, a certain hanyou friend of his?) and instead pulled Sango's face closer to his own, closing out the rest of the world and focusing on the woman in his arms. "So, what is your answer, Sango?" he asked, striving to sound just politely interested.
"Y-y-Yes!" Sango blubbered, smiling through her tears and hugging the houshi even tighter to her. "I-I-I'll stay with you, houshi-sama!"
Miroku shook his head, his eyes becoming just a tiny bit mocking. "Now, now, dear Sango, if we are going to be together, you're going to have to start calling me by my name, aren't you?" As he spoke, Miroku gradually drew closer and closer to Sango's face until the tips of their noses touched, his breath tickling her lips. Sango's teary eyes widened, her heart pounding impossibly fast in her chest.
"Okay...Miroku," she managed. The smile that dawned on the houshi's face when she said his name filled her with the most unfamiliar warmth, but it sure felt good.
"I promise you, dear Sango...you won't regret choosing me."
Then his lips were on hers and nothing else in the world mattered. His cursed hand pulled her face closer to his own, enjoying the feel of his woman's lips beneath his own, loving the fact that she was kissing him back.
For the cursed man who had spent his life studying Buddhism, this moment was truly his Nirvana, the moment where good, love and peace walk hand in hand and everything turns out all right in the end. As long as Sango stayed by him, Miroku knew, for the first time in his life, that everything just might go right in the end.
"I can't eat another bite," Kagome complained, pushing the tray of goodies her mom had made for her as far away from her as possible. "I think Mama made enough food to feed an army."
"No fuckin' kiddin'," InuYasha grumbled. The hanyou was lying on Kagome's bed, looking a little worse for the wear. "Urrrgh... I feel fuckin' awful..."
"No wonder," Kagome chided, walking over to where his own tray of food was lying. "I couldn't eat a quarter of all this food, and you went and scarfed half of it! I wouldn't be surprised if it took you a year to digest all of it!"
InuYasha gave a weak snort. "It won't take me a year," he grumbled.
Kagome turned around, her brow furrowing slightly. "What did you say?" she asked.
Some of the hanyou's stomach problems were forgotten as a small pang of guilt touched his heart. Kagome's right ear had healed about a week before, the stitches slowly dissolving as if they had never been. She had visited the doctor again (InuYasha was prohibited from following her, something that had really pissed him off) but when she came back, she told him that her ear was mostly healed, but not to push herself too much, just in case. (Upon hearing this news, Mama Higurashi had put together their little feast, leading back to the couple in Kagome's bedroom with trays loaded with food, trying hard not to focus on their overfull stomachs.)
"I'm sorry, Kagome," InuYasha said quietly, but loud enough for Kagome's good ear to catch. Kagome looked at him, her eyes becoming stern.
"What have I told you about that, InuYasha?" she scolded, walking over to the bed and sitting down on it. The ailing hanyou groaned slightly as his stomach protested the bed's small movements.
"...Not to keep blaming myself," he mumbled, rolling over onto his back to see if that might help his stomach calm down. ('Why the fuck does it hurt so much?' he wondered.)
"Exactly. I told you I forgive you, and that you should forgive yourself," she told him, reaching out and taking one of his hands with both of her own. The hanyou blushed, his too-full stomach suddenly shifting to the very back of his mind.
"How can you forgive me so easily, though?" he asked, sitting up and looking at her incredulously. "You can't hear out of your right ear anymore, and-"
Kagome shushed him by placing her free index finger on his lips. "Didn't you hear what I said back in the hospital? I knew that I might get hurt if I went to the Sengoku jidai with you, but I accepted it. I'm just relieved that we were able to get Mujōna out of my head without killing me. That would have been a lot worse than me being halfway deaf, after all." Kagome smiled at InuYasha, who managed to smirk back at her. "And as to how I can forgive you so easily-I love you, baka! I've loved you for so long I forgot when I started loving you! That's why I can always forgive you, and I will always forgive you. Anyway, I know it isn't your fault. You've been trying so hard to help me through all this-how could I blame you for that?"
By the end of Kagome's little speech, InuYasha's face matched his haori, though he did look rather pleased. "You said you love me," he stated, a little dumbfounded.
Kagome giggled softly at the rather dopey smile that was stretching across her hanyou's face, loving the soft golden glow in his usually hard eyes. "Hai," she agreed. "I thought it was about time that I told you, since I didn't back when you told me that you loved me."
Some of the goofiness faded from InuYasha's face as he remembered that scene by the fire after he had found her surrounded by crows, remembered how she had sobbed brokenly afterward, since she didn't herself to be worthy of him anymore. "You didn't have to," he told her. "I, uh, sorta knew already."
Kagome, instead of replying right away, reached out and wrapped her arm around InuYasha's waist, drawing herself closer to him and sighing contentedly. She felt his heart speed up against her cheek, ramming wildly into the wall of his chest as he slowly wrapped his arms around her. "It doesn't matter if you knew already," she said. "What matters is that I told you and now you know for sure."
"S'pose that's true," the hanyou mumbled. His heart was thudding so hard and fast that he thought it was going to burst out of his chest and flop out onto the ground. Not that he would have cared if it did; at that moment, he wouldn't have cared if the world had started to end right then and there-all that mattered was the petite woman in his arms. For all he was concerned about, the rest of the world could go to Hell.
After a fashion, Kagome spoke up again. "InuYasha, I've been thinking..."
"What?" InuYasha's voice sounded defensive, and when she looked up, she saw his ears vanish into his hair, as if locking down for impact. Kagome's brow furrowed as she pulled away from InuYasha's chest, though she kept his arms about her body.
"Why do you always get so nervous when I say something like that?" she asked sadly. "I already told you that I'm not going to leave you. Why don't you believe me?" As she spoke, a tear oozed out of her eye and trailed down her cheek.
Unsurprisingly, the hanyou freaked. "Um-fuck-Kagome, don't cry!" he shouted, ears rocketing up as his hands moved to her shoulders, his eyes becoming frantic. "I-It's not that I don't believe you about you staying with me, or...or...or..."
Kagome cocked her head at him, her eyes becoming curious. "Or what?"
"Never mind," he muttered. "Just...what were you gonna say?"
Kagome shook her head, a small smile forming on her face. "I'm thinking about dropping out of school and staying in the Sengoku jidai permanently, if you'll have me."
For a few seconds, InuYasha just gawked at her. His facial expression suggested that Kagome had just expressed a desire to travel to the moon on her bike. The miko thought he looked like he had just blown a few fuses in his head. "Um...InuYasha?" she asked, her brow furrowing with worry. "Are you all right?"
"You...you...you..." InuYasha's mind felt like it had just melted into a big useless pile of glop. She wanted to leave her school, that place that always drew her back to the Heisei jidai-for him? But...but...but...
"Are...are you sure that's what you want?" he finally managed to ask, his voice a dull croak of surprise. Kagome smiled radiantly at him, destroying the rest of his thought processes with little effort.
"I thought about it for a long time, both while I was in the hospital and while I was at home. For the longest time, I've been just floundering to succeed in school, barely passing every class. My friends are all okay, but they don't really seem to care much anymore." Kagome looked a little sad about this, prompting the practically brain-dead hanyou to lean forward and nuzzle her cheek. She giggled softly and raised a hand to hold his head in place, making a sound like a purr when he didn't move away.
"It's okay, koiinu...I can't really say I miss them that much. As time went by, I found myself enjoying their company less and less. They're nice and all, but pretty shallow." InuYasha snorted softly at Kagome's assessment of her three Heisei jidai friends. He'd always thought of them that way.
"What about staying with me forever?" he asked, dreading the answer and mentally kicking himself for asking it. "Did you think about that?"
Kagome made a very unladylike snort. "Of course I did, baka! I've been thinking about that since I realized I loved you! All children leave home eventually, and some just leave earlier than others do. I think I'm ready to leave home now...there's not really that much I have in common with it any more."
The hanyou glanced around at the soft pink walls, a strange heat pulsing through his body along with his blood. "But...won't you miss all this?" he asked, gesturing to the pink walls and furniture.
Kagome sighed. "For a while, but I think I'll get used to it. Don't worry, I think you're quite worth it."
InuYasha blushed again, but started looking more happy and less fearful. "You'd do that...for me," he said, sounding like he didn't quite believe it. Kagome laughed again.
"Yes, already!" she giggled. Then, before he could say anything else, she stretched up and planted a soft kiss right on his surprised lips. For a few seconds, he was too surprised to really do anything except just sit there and be shocked. Then, when his thoughts and body finally reconnected, his arms wrapped around her, twice as tightly as they had before. He returned her affections full force, causing a small 'eep!' of shock to rise out of her throat. But she quickly got over her shock and relaxed against him, one hand rising to play with his ears, the other wrapping itself firmly around his red-clad waist. He growled slightly against her lips and let one of his own hands move from about her body to the right side of her face, his thumb gently circling her recently healed ear.
'Maybe you are deaf in your right ear, Kagome,' he thought fondly, 'but you're still perfect to me.'
A/N: Oookay, I'm totally not doing what I'm supposed to be doing right now, but when I got this chapter in my head, I couldn't focus on anything else until I got it out here!
Sorry for the super late update. =P
