The blood flowed from his cut cheek, a painful reminder of what he had done, a past life he would never be able to forget and his heart ached more than ever. "It hurts," Vincent let go off the mattress and placed his right hand above his heart that was painfully aching, physically and emotionally. "Catherine," he pleaded. The pain was unbearable
Catherine cautiously moved forward and knelt in front of him. She wiped the blood off his cheek but he flinched at her touch. He placed his hand over hers and her first thought was it wasn't soft like Beast's touch.
"Don't," he lowered her hand and let go. "I don't deserve it. I don't deserve you," he looked down to hide the pain and tears in his eyes. The memories came flooding in and tortured him to remember every evil thing he had done. "I remember everything, even as Beast. You were better of with him."
She gently placed both hands on his cheeks, her left hand being covered with his blood as his scar bled. She guided his head back up and their tear filled eyes meet.
"I can't be him, Catherine. I don't have his innocence and I never will. I'm not a bookworm. And these people, I can't help them the way he did. He's gone," he said sadly. He missed being Beast as well and not having to remember who he was and what he had done.
"I know," her tears fell and ran down her cheeks. "I still love you. Deep down you're still the sweet, loving and kind hearted guy I fell in love with. That part of you isn't gone. He's still here," she placed a hand over his heart.
"How do you know?"
"You wouldn't hurt so much if you honestly didn't care about anything or anyone. You're still that guy."
"How can you be so sure?"
She opened her mouth to answer but a loud and painful screaming from outside his chamber echoed through the big room and beyond.
"Private Lumière," he said.
"Doc," she said. They both said at the same time.
"Who?" Catherine asked.
"I'll explain later."
They both got up and raced to where the screaming came from. The big room was filled with the residents, all confused as they watched Beauty and a strange man running towards Doc's chamber. Vincent quickly pulled the curtain down and his hands trembled when he saw Private Lumière kneeling on the floor with his hands covered in blood.
"Are you hurt?" Vincent asked as he squat down in front of Private Lumière.
He too had transformed back to his regular self. He was no more than twenty-five, merely a baby compared to everyone in the unit. He had dark blonde hair and aquamarine eyes, that girls adored. He lifted his shirt and showed the scar by his heart that was bleeding, the same area where he shot the mother. "Corporal Keller, what's going on? It's healed but bleeding but so is your scar on your cheek."
Outside the chamber Chip walked up to Beauty who was watching the two. His tiny hands tugged at hers and she looked down at him. "Beauty, who are they? Where's Beast and Doc?" Chip asked, his voice soft and lost, confused by was going on around him.
"They're Beast and Doc. They remember who they are so they've changed back," she said loud enough so that everyone could hear. She hoped that they all understood what she just said because it still was too much for her to take in.
Her statement was quickly followed by murmurs and more questions. They heard the story about Beast being human from Doc but they never really believed it until now and they always thought that was how Doc looked like and not someone who barely looked like an adult.
Back in the chamber, Vincent was still assessing Private Lumière's bleeding scar. "Does it hurt?"
"In a way it but it doesn't. I don't know how to explain it, sir."
"What do you remember?" Vincent asked.
"Everything, especially killing the mother. I can hear her voice in my head."
Vincent turned his head to look at Catherine and the rest of the residents who stood and stared, completely dumbfounded. "Catherine we have to go."
She turned back to him as Chip held her hand tighter. "Vincent, we can't just leave them here."
"There's not much I can do right now. Private Lumière and I have taught them all they need to know. We have to get back to Fort Drum."
"The Army, that's what you're thinking about right now? What about your family? And what about these people?"
His eyes grew cold as she stared back at him, judging him. Beast was truly gone and she didn't look at him the way she looked at Beast.
"Are you going to help or not?" He said in a louder and angry voice, yelling and scaring Chip, who hid behind Beauty.
"Vincent, you're scaring him."
"I don't have time for this, Catherine. I have to get to the base."
"We should leave, Corporal Keller."
Vincent removed his gaze from the rest of them and turned back to Private Lumière. "Can you walk?"
"Yes, sir."
"C'mon," Vincent said as he helped Private Lumière get up and walked out of the chamber. All eyes were on them but all he cared about was the pair of jade eyes that was welling up with tears.
"Private Lumière, hold on," he said in a tone that wasn't like the Vincent she knew. He walked to her then whispered in her ear. "Beast is gone, Catherine, and there's nothing I can do to bring him back. You either accept me for who I am or love someone who no longer exist.
Catherine looked at him but didn't say a word. This was not the man she fell in love with. She turned away from him and wiped her tears. More and more she wished Beast was still here.
Vincent didn't need his super hearing to know that she was crying. There was so much happening in his mind that he couldn't find the right words. He never meant to hurt her or scare everyone else. He bent down to Chip's height. "I'm sorry kiddo, I didn't mean to scare you."
"You're Beast?"
"I was."
"Cool. Did you know that you looked like a lion. You were big and furry," Chip said in a very animated voice. He stepped aside and stood beside Beauty while holding her hand. "Are you leaving us?"
"I have a few things I need to take care off. People I know are looking for me."
"Are you and Doc coming back?"
Vincent knew what it was like growing up without his parents and he felt sorry for Chip who recently lost his mother. "I'll try," he replied knowing it was something Beast would do and it's something Catherine would want him to do. He put his hand on top of Chip's head and ruffled his hair.
Chip giggled and let go of Beauty's hand. "That tickles."
Vincent removed his hand from Chip's head and placed at his side, close to Catherine's hand. "Behave and don't forget to listen to your dad, okay?"
"Okay," Chip nodded his tiny head.
Catherine moved her hand and slipped it in his. She squeezed his hand and in that moment he knew she had accepted him.
"And no more running away either, okay?"
"Okay," Chip answered. "Beauty, will you come visit, too?"
"Of course. I have to take care of some stuff with Beast and Doc but I'll come back."
"We have to go now," Vincent said.
"Bye Beast," Chip's voice was soft and innocent, not knowing the effect of what he had just said.
Catherine squeezed his hand harder and let the tears fall. "Bye Chip.
"Bye Doc. Bye Beauty," he wrapped his small arms around her that didn't quite reach.
"Bye Chip," Private Lumière callsed out from the arc entrance.
"Please don't tell anyone about us. This is our only home," one of them pleaded.
"We promise not to. If anyone wants, there are homeless shelters," Vincent answered.
"They're the reason why we came down here," another added.
"I understand," Vincent replied. "Please take care of each other."
BATB
The car ride was quiet as her two passengers slept. Their bleeding had stopped before the road trip but that didn't ease her mind. They were too tight lipped about why their first stop had to be the Army base. She was even more worried when Vincent borrowed her phone to call Sergeant Cogsworth and he walked away to make sure she didn't hear their conversation. He was too secretive and not open like Beast.
"I'm sorry about your father," he suddenly said after waking up and interrupting her chaotic thoughts. "I wish I could have been there for you the way you needed me to."
"Vincent," she gripped the steering wheel..
"Just listen," he looked back and made sure that Private Lumière was still sound asleep. "I'm sorry about what happened. I should have never taken advantage of you that way. I never meant to hurt you."
"You weren't yourself."
"I was myself. What I didn't understand when I was Beast when I started to remember I didn't just see all the deaths I caused but also what I did to suppress my pain. Catherine, I'm not perfect."
"I never asked you to be," she replied.
"There's this girl in my past. Whenever I wanted to forget, I'd go to her. I should have never treated you that way. You mean more to me than that."
"We both used each other that night. We were both hurting."
"You can't use someone who wanted to fuck you that badly just to forget. That's all I could think about. How much I wanted you. I would of fucked you without a condom if you hadn't mentioned it."
Her eyes filled with tears and she had to pull over. She turned off the ignition and got out of the car. She just needed to get away from him. Where she was headed she didn't care. Vincent quickly followed her and caught up after a few feet from the back of the car. He grabbed her arm and stopped her from walking any further as he pulled her back into his arms.
"You don't know how much I hate myself for what I did to you and how I treated you."
"Why are you telling me this now?" She began to tremble from holding back her tears and anger
"You deserve to know the truth. I didn't do all those things to you because you wanted me to. I did it because I wanted to. At that tirne I didn't care about your feelings and how badly you were hurting. I was only trying to get rid of my pain. My memories just wouldn't stop and I, I couldn't stop myself."
Catherine tried to shove him away but he only held on tighter and kept her in his arms. "So that's all I was to you?" She forced herself to look at him with tears in her eyes.
"At that time, yes. Once I started, I couldn't stop. I saw how much pain you were in but for some reason instead of stopping me, you let me continue even if it hurt you more."
"All those times that I kept apologizing to you," she said as she let the tears fall. It was a night she would rather forget.
"The other part of me didn't know and didn't understand. When I was Beast with blue eyes I really didn't know much except that I loved you with all my heart. I know I don't deserve it, Catherine but I hope someday you can forgive me. Like Beast, I don't want to lose you."
"You couldn't tell me this before we left?" She finally managed to put a distance between them.
"I know it's selfish but if I had told you earlier I knew you wouldn't have agreed to take us to the base."
She quickly swung her arm and his cheek burned as the imprint of hand marked it red. He felt the sting of the slap all the way to his heart. He knew then how much he really hurt her and continued to hurt her.
"I deserve that."
"You deserve more than just a slap on the face but since Private Lumière is in the back seat of my car I won't leave you here."
"Catherine," he pleaded.
"Vincent I'm sick and tired of your shit."
"I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to do."
"So you force me to a six hour drive to tell me that you go fuck some girl to forget your pain?"
"That was before I met you."
"And apparently not just your past."
"You know you mean more than that to me. I love you, Catherine."
"Not enough to trust me or you would have told me this before we left. All you had to do was tell me the truth, Vincent. I still would have driven you to the base. Instead you do this. Do you remember what I told before you disappeared?"
Vincent nodded and he had the same sad eyes as Beast before she left him. "You said to never assume and I should ask but I assumed you wouldn't do this after I told you about her."
"After everything we've been through, do you really think I would be that shallow and just walk away because you slept with some girl to forget your pain? Or that you did the same thing with me? Yes, it hurt but we both we're trying to ease our pain somehow. I understand that. I was there with you."
He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know."
"Do you even realize how much it hurt to lose you?"
"I saw flashes of it before I changed back. I saw how much pain you were in and how much you cried every night. Everyone kept telling you to move on but you never could."
"Then you should have known that I would have forgiven you. I would have done anything for you if you had just asked."
"I know and I'm sorry."
"Sorry isn't enough anymore Vincent."
"What are you saying?"
"Now it's time for you to listen. I never forgot about you and when I finally let you go it turns out that I fell in love with you again. It's twisted and it's fucked up but I didn't question it when you returned but this, you use me to take you to the base and bombard me with this information because you knew I would have no other choice but to listen to your shit. And now you want my forgiveness? You want honesty? You were right, I was better of with Beast. At least he understood what it meant to be in love. Get in the car as soon as we get there I'm leaving," she turned away from him and walked to the the driver's side door.
"Catherine wait," he placed his hands on the door so that she wouldn't be able to open it.
She spun around and faced him with tears freely running down her tear stained cheeks. "WHAT NOW?"
"I have something to tell you. Do you want to know why Private Lumière found me in an alley?"
"Do I have a choice? Ever since you turned back everything has been about what you want and what you need.
"Do you really hate me that much?"
Catherine wiped her tears. "I don't hate you. I'm angry and frustrated. It's been one thing after another with you."
"Oh," he took his hands off the door. "Never mind then. We should just go. The sooner we get there the sooner you won't have to see me anymore. I never meant to hurt you, Catherine. I know I sound like a broken record but I really am sorry," he sounded like Beast who had lost all hope after he fucked things up. His voice was low and sadness seeped through each word. "I don't want to lose you. I just got you back."
"Vincent," she sighed and started to feel guilty. "I really hate it when you make it difficult for me to stay mad at you."
He looked up at her. "Is that a good thing?"
She nodded. "It's a good thing."
A slight smile formed at the corner of his lips. "Will you let me tell you why I was in an alley?"
"I want you to tell me," she said more kindly as she searched for his hand.
He held her hands and entwined their fingers. "After I was stabbed the guy ran off. I tried chasing him but my wounds were worse than I thought. I wasn't sure if I was going to live or not and I didn't want his face to be the last thing I see if I died. I was trying to go back to your apartment. I promised you that I would. I was coming back to you."
"Vincent," she said as more tears rolled down her cheeks.
"I don't expect you to forgive me now but I'd really like it if you would come with me to the base. That's the reason why I called Sergeant Cogsworth. I had to clear it with him first. I don't know how Private Lumière and I are going to explain what happened to us without your help," he placed his hands on her hips and pulled her close. "This whole thing has been one fucking twisted nightmare but through it all you're the one that made it all worth it. I need you, Catherine," moved his hands to the small of her back and locked his fingers together. "I'm asking you. Will you stay me and go in with us to the base?"
She nodded. "Yes."
He leaned down and she closed her eyes as his lips came closer to hers. She grabbed his shirt as she felt his breath mingling with hers. The kiss was soft as he pressed his lips on hers.
"Are we there yet?" Private Lumière's voice was muffled by the closed window.
They both quickly pulled away like two teenagers who got caught by a parent. Her cheeks turned a bright pink as she blushed.
"We better get going."
"Vincent, I felt that."
They both looked down towards his crotch.
"I wish I had jeans on."
"Are you going to be okay?"
"I got use to this as Beast. It'll go away soon," he gave her a light peck on the lips. "Just give me a minute."
Catherine looked back inside the car and Private Lumière was lying down in the back seat. "Private Lumière fell back asleep."
"Nicholas. You don't have to call him Private Lumière and he has a habit of doing that. It surprised us at first but we got use to it."
"He sleeps like a baby. I can't believe he went through so much."
"We're here now because of you. Saving you in the subway saved all of us. I'll drive. You get some rest. I'm afraid it'll be a long day with Sergeant Cogsworth."
"Will you be okay to drive," she asked as she peeked down between them and his bulge had gone down.
"I'm fine. Besides, now that I'm back we'll have plenty of time to catch up," he smirked. "C'mon," he walked her to the passenger side of the car and opened the door for her. He waited for her to be seated and closed the door.