Fury
Loki was sitting in the kitchen, having breakfast with the other Avengers (sans Tony so far – he had decided to leave the mortal to the sleep he so desperately needed right now) when JARVIS informed them that Fury was calling, but then stopped mid-sentence to add that Mr Stark had taken the call.
Two minutes later, the engineer walked into the kitchen, sweatpants low on his hips and with a black shirt that would probably showcase some oh-so-witty quip if the millionaire hadn't worn it inside out. One of his hands pressed a Stark Phone to his ear, the other one made little motions that resembled a mouth opening and closing. With a pointed eye-roll, he greeted the other Avengers and silently mouthed blah blah blah before snatching a pancake from Loki's plate and stuffing it into his mouth.
Then, he stilled and huffed before muttering around the food: "Mh-hmph, 'course 'm doin' tha'. – Eat'n? Who's eat'n? - Nah." He swallowed and coughed. "I'd never eat with you on the line, Nicky. That would be so disrespectful. – You're always welcome here. Of course. Although you really shouldn't try to bring your – seriously? Did you just hang up on me? Whatever, lovely chat, as always." He tossed the phone onto the table and pushed Loki's arm aside so he could make himself at home in the god's lap. "Fury's coming to visit", he said in a way of answer to the questioning looks from his teammates. "He didn't say it like that, but he wants Loki in for the Avengers Initiative."
"I thought he didn't like me?", the prince asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Well, he doesn't like me either, so that's not all that important", Tony told him with a grin. "And he's going to lecture you for a while and maybe tell you you're recommended but not recommended since they seem to like that sort of thing at SHIELD's..."
"That was one time, Tony", Natasha cut in, twirling a butter knife between her fingers like a lethal weapon. Which it probably was when she wielded it.
"Whatever. You ready to become an Avenger, Lokes? Lemme warn you, if you do, there's going to be no excuse then to avoid the press conferences and you're going to have to save people even if you hate them."
Loki grimaced. "Loki, Silvertongue, Liesmith and Avenger? I am not sure if I want that title added to my collection", he remarked drily.
The engineer retorted: "It might be a nice replacement for 'Father of the eight-legged horse' though."
"Mother of the eight-legged horse", the god corrected calmly, enjoying the stunned silence that his words were met with before Tony said slowly: "I am going to ask you about that story. One day. I'm not sure if I'm ready for it right now." Loki just smiled and returned his attention to the pancake in front of him.
The banter in the kitchen lasted almost another hour before JARVIS announced that director Fury would now be granted access to the common floor. Loki grinned to himself as he began to weave a spell, unnoticed by the other Avengers, and then hushed the others when the elevator pling'ed and the sound of Fury's footsteps could be heard from the hallway.
Tap-clack. Tap-clack. Tap-clack.
Clint frowned and tilted his head while Loki had a really hard time not grinning.
Tap-clack. Tap-clack.
"What the hell is that?", Anthony whispered and the god was really grateful for centuries of acting that helped him keep his laughter to himself.
Tap-clack.
"It sounds like... not sure, metal boots? But only one of them", Steve mused.
Tap.
Loki stuffed his mouth with pancake to suppress a childish giggle.
Clack.
There were a few beats of silence when Fury moved to stand in the doorway, visible to all of the Avengers. Anthony was the first one to burst out laughing, followed suit by Clint and then the Captain (who very poorly disguised it as coughing). Thor seemed slightly irritated and adorably uncomprehending, Bruce grinned into his tea and even Natasha's lips were curled up into a smirk. She met Loki's eyes with an inquisitively raised eyebrow and the god gave an innocent shrug that said it all, really.
"Mind telling me what's so funny?", Fury barked. Loki eyed him up and down and found that he had outdone himself this time. The director's eyepatch was still in place, but there was a skull with two crossed bones displayed on it. He wore a large, triangular brown hat and a red bandanna that couldn't hide the dread locks hanging around his face. His trademark black coat had been replaced by a brown one that had apparently been repaired one time too many. Underneath, there was a white wool shirt and leather trousers, one leather boot and (clack) an artificial, wooden leg.
So, admittedly, Loki had been using this Pirates of the Caribbean movies as a reference. It had worked, hadn't it?
"Cap-", Anthony wheezed, gasped for air and then tried once again, "Captain Black Sparrow." That sent Clint, who had just calmed down a little, into another fit of cackling. "What a lovely surprise!"
"Grow the hell up, Stark", Fury growled. And that was the best about this particular spell. The director didn't even notice that anything was out of the ordinary.
"How was your holiday at the Caribbean?"
The spy gave Anthony a long, dirty look before he ordered: "Just stop talking. Those jokes are older than you, Stark, and they've never been funny. And that's for y'all." He glared at the rest of the Avengers who were all in varying states of suppressing grins and giggles (except for Loki, who was a picture of wide-eyed innocence).
"Older than I am?", Anthony repeated with raised eyebrows. "Just how long – never mind. I think you wanted something, didn't you? Something about taking Loki aboard the Black Pearl?" There was very slow, controlled breathing from where Clint sat and another cough from Steve. Fury sent them another glare that said Not amused in about 500 languages before he spoke up.
"Alright, Loki, if you'd have the kindness to shove Stark off your lap so I can talk to you, I'd be infinitely grateful", he said in a voice that didn't sound like grateful at all.
The engineer interjected: "It's actually quite comfortable here, I think I'll just – hey!" Loki gave him a sorry-not-sorry smile from the other side of the table. To hurry things up, he had just teleported away from under Anthony, causing the mortal to drop onto the chair and nearly down to the floor. "What about the No Teleporting In The Tower Rule?", he demanded.
"I am afraid that I cannot recall a rule like that", the prince responded with another innocent shrug.
"Well. It's a rule now", Anthony grumbled.
"I spared you a lot of embarrassing situations by disobeying it so far", the god pointed out, recalling their first night that had started out on the kitchen table. No need to retell that story, although Clint seemed to remember it, judging by the little cough that sounded like "thank god".
"Yeah, go ahead", Fury cut in, "keep bickering, I've got all day." This time, nobody dared to speak up under his glare and he reached into his coat to pull out a black SHIELD file. It looked odd, so sterile and modern produced from the well-used pirate leather coat, so Loki quickly waved a hand and extended the spell on it, making it look like an ancient piece of parchment. It earned him another chorus of chuckling from the breakfast table and an irritated glance from Fury before the director tossed the file/ parchment onto the table, barely missing Natasha's fruit bowl, and asked: "Did somebody drug you or something?"
"Not this time", Bruce answered and Loki quickly feigned a cough to hide his surprised laughter. Fury's expression made clear that he didn't buy it, but he had apparently given up asking.
Clearing his throat, the god picked up the small folder and questioned: "Does this mean I am officially in on the team, Captai- excuse me, director?"
"That", Fury said after breathing in and out through his nose, "is not my call to make." Upon Loki's surprised look, he pulled the other hand, the one that had been hidden up until now, out from behind his back and gestured towards the table (it was a shiny, golden metal hook). "They're the team. I got 'em together, but they've got a say now, too."
There was a moment of silence (only interrupted by Clint's coughing that turned more and more worrying by the minute) until Steve spoke up first: "I think he would be a great asset to the team. I'd love to have him here."
"I agree with Captain Capsicle on this", Anthony said now. "Magic and technology make an awesome combination, apart from... uh, other benefits."
"He's got nice hair", Natasha stated while looking at her fingernails. That seemed to be every input that they'd get from her.
"I believe his healing... magic would be extremely useful", Bruce piped up.
Thor did, of course, agree: "Loki's magical abilities have saved me countless times. It would be an honour to me to fight by his side again."
"He's a jackass." All heads turned towards Clint, who was, surprisingly enough, not currently choking on his laughter. After a moment of silence, he added: "I still think he'd be nice to have on the team. What would we be without at least one unsympathetic, sulky, moody guy?"
"I thought that was you", Anthony commented with a raised eyebrow, making Loki smile. He was aware that Barton had just been his usual self, but that didn't mean that he didn't enjoy hearing Anthony defending him. It had something strangely consoling.
"No, no, I'm the one with all the great jokes", the archer corrected, nudged Anthony's side and stage-whispered: "Hey, why is pirating so addictive?"
"...Uh, no idea?", the mortal replied with a raised eyebrow.
"They say once you lose your first hand, you get hooked!" The two broke into another fit of giggling before Anthony countered: "And what's Captain Hook's favourite store?" Upon the questioning glance he got from Clint, he grinned: "The Secondhand-Shop!"
Fury began to tap his foot on the floor (unfortunately, it was the one Loki had made into a wooden leg so it made little clack-clack-clack noises instead of the usual impatient tapping) and the inventor turned back towards him to comment: "Nice boot, by the way." Fury frowned, glanced down at his feet and Loki chose that moment to remove the spell that prevented the director from seeing his... um, new outfit. There was a moment of silence in which the director/ pirate captain raised his hand slowly to stare at the silver hook, then down at the wooden leg and then at Loki with a murderous expression.
The god stood to attention and saluted, prompting a snicker from behind him that broke the tense silence. Fury breathed in deeply while rolling his eyes – pardon, eye – heavenwards and then snapped: "Y'know what? I don't fucking care. Stay here, you fit right in with those." With that, he turned on his heel and stomped out of the kitchen (tap-clack, tap-clack, tap-clack) and Loki could hear him bark something at some poor SHIELD-agent who hadn't managed to stifle his laughter. Well, it wasn't like Loki had done any harm. He'd lift the spell.
Eventually.
Hulk
The first mission Loki attended after officially being assigned as an Avenger was one that involved contraptions which Tony called 'Doombots'. He was still not sure whether he should admire Victor van Doom because he, as a mortal, managed to actually use some basic levels of magic or if he should murder him for having the audacity of calling himself a mage. Maybe those two things weren't all that contradictory.
The greatest problems about these things were that they came in large numbers and that they, unlike living beings, had no perception for pain that would allow them to be incapacitated by a missing limb or something. They needed to be either beheaded or crushed completely and thoroughly. Needless to say, the green beast greatly enjoyed itself. Not that Loki minded, but he still paid attention to keeping a respectful distance between the two of them. A little caution couldn't hurt.
Actually, it was a quite pleasant way of relieving stress – he was allowed to tear things apart without having to take (great) care about collateral damage. Doom's bots were the perfect playground to try out new spells and ideas for new ways of using magic (which didn't mean that he didn't still want to kill the mortal, but something about invading Latveria and murdering somebody there seemed diplomatically unacceptable so that would have to wait).
All in all, this wasn't the worst thing he had ever been forced to do in his free time.
"For the love of god, I swear, I am going to murder that fucker!" Anthony apparently begged to differ. "Do you see that? I mean, do you see that? That bastard is so trying to copy my repulsor technology, that's so shitty it's not even funny anymore. If I get a hand on that..."
"Why don't you focus on the problem at hand?", Loki suggested while screwing a Bot's head off. It made the most adorable screeching noise.
"I am focussed. By the way, nice one, Loki", Anthony commented, prompting the god to look upwards. The mortal was floating above him in his flashy armour and gave him a thumbs up while the mage tossed the Bot's head aside.
"We're nearly done here, there are just about – oh shit, Lokes, watch out behind –" Loki whirled around and only realized that it was a mistake when the metal arm of the Doombot hit his temple with full force and sent him tumbling to the ground. "- you. Oh fuck. Are you okay? Loki?"
"Shut up", Loki slurred, clutching the side of his head as he blinked and tried to regain his bearings. "Your voice hurts."
"Oh thank god", Anthony breathed.
"You are most welcome", the god muttered and winced as Thor sent a booming "Brother! Are you well?" his way over the communicators. Oh, and there was still the issue with the bot... Groaning, Loki turned onto his back and tried to focus his magic despite the throbbing pain in his head. The Doombot was apparently one that its creator controlled by himself and Loki was grateful that van Doom enjoyed bragging so much. Currently, he was engaged in a speech about how the combination of technology and magic (pah! This man and magic!) would always be superior to just one of the things and how ending Loki's life was going to blah blah blah.
But he had one of the copied repulsors aimed at the prince and Loki saw the bot at least in two, sometimes even four places at once which made the use of his magic even more difficult. Also, the throbbing headache made it hard to concentrate enough to form a decent spell and he was running out of time...
Suddenly, Banner's alter ego jumped onto the Doombot from the side and tore its wiring apart effortlessly which efficiently rid Loki of his problem, only to present him with a larger one.
Growling, Hulk turned towards him and the god felt a surge of panic as the green beast crouched down in front of him. He heard Anthony's voice shout something over the comm, but it was drowned out by the sound of his own pulse and the blood rushing in his ears. The panic made accessing his magic an impossible task and he couldn't move, felt like he was rooted to the spot he was sitting on as a large, green hand reached his way and –
He squeezed his eyes shut and held his breath, waiting for an impact; there was dead silence on the comm lines as if everybody was holding their breath. Then, there was a surprisingly gentle pat to the top of his head (which still hurt a lot with the head injury and all, but it was nothing like being used to redecorate the pavement).
"Good puny god", Hulk declared with his growling voice and Loki looked up in surprise to find the giant's broad face grinning at him widely before he was off to smash again.
Loki was still staring at its retreating back when Anthony landed beside him and flipped the faceplate of his suit up. He appeared to be out of breath, but grinned as he extended a metal hand to help his lover up and remarked: "Now would you look at that. I think you made a friend there, Lokes."
#
Okay, folks, this is it! The main story is over. Thank you all for your wonderful support and sticking around 'til the end! There will be some epilogue-ish things following, but I'm not sure when. I'll focus on Sold to the Devil for now. Hope you enjoyed the ride, I certainly did! :)
~Majinie