Chapter 37

Completely oblivious to the consternation they were causing upstairs in the hotel, Lina and Zelgadis were walking through the small garden, voices low. They'd tried to figure out what to say, where to start, and at first it had been stilted and awkward. It took several tries for them both to say more than a few syllables at a time.

A rabbit had done it though, breaking through the grass to hop frantically for a better hiding place, scaring Lina into Zelgadis' arms. They'd both been so jumpy that they'd clung to each other for a moment before breaking into softly embarrassed laughter. Now, almost two hours later, they were walking and talking almost as if the past month and a half hadn't happened at all.

"You know, for a long time there I wasn't sure I was going to get you back," Lina admitted, quirking a fragile little smile as she looked at his fingers laced in hers.

He walked along beside her for a few beats before he glanced at their hands and then looked away. "I wasn't sure you'd want me back. After everything I did…" His voice trailed off as she came to a stop and forced him to turn to her.

She stood there looking at him, her crimson eyes brilliant. A breeze picked at her hair, tugged at her sleeves, giving her the illusion of motion while she was standing still. "Stop it, Zelgadis. That wasn't you. You aren't a monster driven by hate. That's not what Mazoku are. If I've learned anything in this, it's that there's good and bad in everything."

He looked at her, floored, unable to comprehend what she was telling him. Mazoku weren't monsters driven by hate to destroy the world? What in the name of Cepheid was he missing? "Lina… I… listen,"

She shook her head, hair flying as she kept speaking. "No, you listen to me. There's a lot of stuff that you probably don't know. There's a lot that you won't know, but there's some things that you need to know. And one of them is about Jedah."

He turned, pulling his hand free from hers. "I know about him. I know all about him. He's Hellmaster, and he's not my brother." For some reason the fact that he wasn't related hurt him more than he could explain. Maybe it was because he'd wanted a family.

"No, he's not your brother. You are related, though. He's Rezo's half brother. But that's beside the point." She took a breath, preparing her thoughts. Zelgadis didn't know that Jedah had stayed true to his promise, didn't know the lengths to which he went to protect her. "A long time ago, you made Jedah promise to protect me."

Zelgadis nodded warily, recalling that day when he had handed Jedah the pendant, making the then-seeming youth promise to give it to Lina with the greatest of care, making him promise to protect Lina if anything happened to Zelgadis himself. "I remember doing that."

"He did, Zel. He even destroyed someone that he cared deeply about in order to protect me." Lina skirted around the identity, partly because it made her head hurt to think of Xellos being anyone's lover. "I can't begin to understand how that hurt Jedah." And then she'd been tactless to ask him how he'd managed to do it.

Zelgadis looked stunned, his memory filtering through the details. He'd been standing in front of Lina, watching Xellos taunt her when he'd been hit by Jedah's magic and knocked out. But that meant that… "Xellos," His voice was a startled whisper. "Jedah destroyed Xellos… his…" The look on Lina's face confirmed it, and he stood there for a moment, taken aback.

"Yeah, I think that's what I thought, too." Lina admitted softly. "But the thing is that Jedah isn't evil and neither are you. You're both Mazoku, you're both pretty damned powerful, but you're better than Mazoku like Mazenda and Kanzeil." She took a deep breath and continued. "And the only reason I'm here is because Jedah held true to his word."

Zelgadis' memory flared, something that Jedah had done, a mental link, a whispered memory of a lifetime. Jedah had hidden nothing from him, not even his choice of Xellos. He hadn't seen it at the time, had only barely grasped the Truth within the gift given when he'd rejected it out of hand. But now… now, with the words that Lina gave him, the truth that he could hear in her voice… "What do I do now?"

The words that Lina gave him were an echo of words that he'd heard before, words that a memory of Rezo had given him in warning. "You have to accept yourself, Zelgadis. You have to accept who and what you are. You may not have always been a Mazoku, but you can't deny your own existence."

He was struck by the clarity with which she spoke, the words open and honest and, for once, he didn't argue. "It seems that I'm still learning who and what I am, Lina. I thought I knew, but now I'm not so sure. Are you certain that you want to stick around and find out?" It was the only way that Zelgadis could think to admit his beginning to accept his nature and to give her the chance to leave if she needed it.

Lina walked up to him, reaching up with both hands to touch his cheeks and look to him in complete and utter seriousness. The glitter in her eyes reminded him of the day that she had said 'I Do' in that tiny little chapel on the other side of the non-existent barrier, and he found that he was holding his breath. "Zelgadis Greywords, you just try to get rid of me."

Her kiss sealed her words, and he reached up, holding her tightly to him as if he never wanted to let her go. Because of this, they both missed the trio standing on the other side of the hedge fence, the three companions who had stood witness to his admission of acceptance and her words in reply. The trio didn't stay, though, moving on before they were noticed, each smiling as if the sun had come out to shine on a dreary day.