JJ's 20th birthday dawned clear and sunny. Cool in the morning, but the forecast promised a high in the low seventies. The warmer weather - and the spring - could not have come fast enough. Unfortunately for JJ, her birthday didn't count as any kind of national holiday, so she still had to show up for rehab in the morning. She was improving - everyone in her family said so - but it was hard to see, firsthand.

She was still exhausted a lot of the time, but tried to put what energy she did have into getting better. The therapists told her she could expect improvement up to two years after the injury. So far, she was just shy of four months past it. And, her mom had read accounts of improvement way after two years. So, there was still hope. If only she could start feeling more positive about things again. But depression clung to her like a second skin. Her family understood, but they couldn't always be patient with her, when she wanted to sleep huge chunks of the day away, stay inside, and watch TV, instead of joining them in anything family-oriented.

So, JJ did something she had tried as a child, after losing Janet. She decided to look for one good thing about today. Something she could be honestly happy about. Her birthday would be obvious, except JJ wasn't that excited about celebrating anything. But there would be cake. And ice cream. And JJ had never been able to say no to those, so not everything had changed after all.

She made her way unsteadily to the kitchen, where she could already smell the cake baking. Penelope and Derek were hanging a banner, while Aaron and Spencer were at the kitchen table doing school stuff. Aaron hadn't returned to school after those assholes treated him like crap, and he had a really bad moment where he ended up sitting outside in the garden a couple months ago. JJ still didn't know all the details, but she didn't need to. This was what Aaron needed. To be home, where Mom could keep an eye on him, he could learn in peace, and he could heal. Speaking of Mom, she was at the stove. She was responsible for the cake. JJ tried to smile, but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Did you decide what you want for your birthday yet?" Spencer asked, noticing her.

"I don't need anything," JJ persisted, finding a chair and sitting down. "Except maybe some cake. Is that lemon bundt cake?" she asked rhetorically. JJ knew lemon cake when she smelled it. It had been a tradition in her family. Her great-grandma had always made lemon bundt cake for birthdays, and they were JJ and Janet's favorite. Even when her friends wanted cakes in shapes of their favorite cartoons, or, in later years, frozen ice cream cakes, JJ and Janet had both remained firm in their desire for the tradition their grandma started. JJ was grateful that her mom was open to things like this. It helped. It also made her miss her family.

"Can I go see Janet?" she asked abruptly. She remembered walking to the cemetery once as a kid, but that had taken a long time, even without a head injury.

"That's what you want for your birthday?" Spencer asked, incredulous. "It's somewhat morbid, don't you think?"

"She's my family, too. For longer than you," JJ insisted, suddenly defensive.

"All right. Enough," Mom said calmly. She looked at JJ straight on. "We don't put each other down for any reason," she explained, like she was being so patient, but JJ just cocked her head. She hadn't put Spencer anywhere.

"Whatever…I'm going to my room…" JJ decided.

"Wait. I'll take you to see Janet," Penelope spoke up, climbing off the chair and grabbing her keys off the counter. "A little more tact next time," she advised Spencer softly, squeezing his shoulder on the way by. JJ saw him flinch and sort of felt bad, but left those feelings behind her as she followed Penelope out to her car.

"Derek?" Jordan asked, sounding urgent, her own voice low.

"Yeah, it's me. What's up?" he asked. Things had been a little quiet on her end lately, but Derek chose to believe it was because she was busy with school, like she said, and not for any other reason. Like, she was freaked out by the single reference to the past, or to the kiss.

"I'm sitting here in a class I share with Stan, and he is nowhere to be seen. A friend of his mentioned he was driving up to Reston to see JJ. I tried to call her but her cell phone's been off."

"Shit," Derek cursed. "I'm all the way across town. How close is he? Do you know?"

"No, I have no idea. I just thought one of you should know, since he's not the best egg, and JJ's been opposed to seeing him for months."

"Yeah, got it, thanks for the heads-up," Derek said succinctly and hung up. He tried JJ again, but no luck. Her party was on for tonight, and the last thing any of them needed was Stan coming in to mess things up.

Aaron had worked for weeks to improve from where he had been - devastated over his biological parents' love for Sean - and abused by those assholes at school. It wasn't easy. Every day was a struggle, actually. He worked hard in therapy, which triggered him even more now than before, but he took comfort in Derek's steady presence. Even on days like today when he took a phone call from Jordan and referenced his location as if he were frustrated. They had been over this. It was no problem. Derek was open to talking or not. If Derek cursed at traffic or took a call that didn't mean the commute suddenly was a problem, it just meant Derek was human.

"Who was that?" Aaron asked evenly, trying to keep himself grounded by gripping the arm rest tightly. If he kept talking, his demons from therapy were less likely to show up and make his life hell, so Aaron asked questions. He felt like a reporter. It was kind of nice.

"Jordan."

"What did she want?" he asked, keeping his eyes straight ahead.

"Don't worry about it," Derek dismissed, though Aaron could see how tightly he gripped the wheel.

"Do you love her?" he spoke carefully.

"I don't know. Maybe," Derek allowed.

"So, why are you pissed that she called you?"

"I'm not."

"You wanna know what I got JJ for her birthday?" Aaron wondered.

"Sure. What?" Derek managed, relaxing just a little.

"Pepper spray. In case she goes back to college and has to defend herself. I got her the fog, so it will disperse better. The stream shoots farther, but you have to have good aim, and I don't know anyone who has good aim in a crisis."

Derek smiled to himself. "That's not a bad gift," he said to himself. "Might come in handy."

Spencer was enjoying a piece of cake and some ice cream at JJ's party. They were exceptionally delicious, which was why Spencer hadn't been able to detect the subtle filling of the space around him. When he sat down at the patio table, there had been no one there, but the next time he glanced up, he was surrounded. He set his bowl and spoon down with a clatter, but tried to stay calm.

It might have worked, too, if one of them hadn't smiled at him, and laid a hand on his arm, just like the football players had six months ago. Even though it was rude, Spencer scraped his chair back, making his way up the deck stairs and into the house.

He collided with Dave at the door, who was about to call everybody back for seconds or thirds on the food. Spencer had started with dessert, and since it was a birthday, Mom had allowed it.

"Hey, kiddo. Are you all right?" Dave asked.

Spencer was not all right. Not even close. Because there were more people inside than there were outside. He couldn't breathe, and there was nowhere to go, except…he made his way quickly through the crowd, tripping down the last three stairs and slamming the door to his bedroom grabbing the walkie-talkie he kept by his bed. He remained a lover of all things old-fashioned and only used cell phones when he absolutely had to. They were useful for surveillance, but little else, as far as Spencer was concerned. He willed his racing heartbeat to slow down to something approaching a normal level.

"Penelope, this is Spencer. Do you read me? Over," he said in a shaky voice.