Diamond didn't know what to think when she returned home to Whiterun with Libby and the rest of the Companions. She didn't know what to say to Libby, who looked more than a little pale when she returned from the battlements after firing at Dabiyrrya. After Libby freed Dabiyrrya, she not only spared her life, but gave her a small fortune in gold for the bandit bitch to run off and join the rebels.
Diamond was about to question it, but it was the grip from Vilkas' hand that stopped her from saying so. Libby then left to fulfill her promise to fire an arrow at Dabiyrrya, and then came back. But she came back, different . . . she suddenly seemed more fatigued, tired as if the aftermath of the battle had just started to affect her.
When they left the cave as a group, they walked out to the smell of blood. And it was puddled everywhere. Torvar, Athis, Ria and Njada thankfully received Libby's message and took care of the rest of the Silver-Hand located in the cave. They were smeared, splattered and bathed in the blood, their weapons rustic in color.
But Libby . . . she didn't even care. At least, it looked like she didn't. She simply walked past them, gripping her bow even tighter in her hands as she made her way up to the battlements. Even Farkas didn't go after her. And when she came back down, her face was still placid, though paler and . . . haunted, almost.
Once they made it back to Jorrvaskr, Libby departed from the group, not even bothering with a goodbye. Kodlak looked to Farkas, but he simply shook his head and walked into the hall. It was so strange to think that he knew how Libby gets now. It is so wired to think that he knows her now like the back of his hand.
Now sitting by the warm fire of the hall, Diamond devours multiple plates and bowls of food, and as she's aiming her eyes on a plate of sweet rolls, she can't help but flick her eyes to Kodlak, who is now reading at the head of the table. Many of the warriors praised Kodlak for how well in battle he held up with Libby, and he simply chuckled and simply said; "I told you so."
As Diamond chomps down on her first sweet roll, a part of her wonders if she should've spoken to Libby – congratulated her, thanked her for saving Kodlak – but she wasn't really given the chance since she left without a word. And it would seem like something is bothering her.
All the more reason to go and speak to her.
But is it really her place? It would mean a lot to Libby, in a way. Or she could just snap at Diamond and slam the door in her face. Maybe if even Farkas didn't want to go, perhaps it is best she waits until Libby comes to the hall.
Diamond looks to Torvar, indulging himself in some warm soup when she asks, "How was the slaughter?"
He looks to her, finishes slurping his spoonful and says, "Pretty fun. They didn't put up much of a fight, though I do think some stragglers got away."
Diamond shrugs. A few isn't that bad, since she and Aela have been butchering their camp like bee hives, they should practically be extinct by now. Looking over at the wall, she gazes upon the shattered warhammer plaque on the wall. They're so close to piecing together Wuuthrad again, the mighty axe that Ysgramor himself used during the siege of the Night of Tears – the great battle against the Snow Elves.
Nowadays, Diamond isn't so sure about the 'glory' of the battle. It could've been because she's an Imperial, or the rumors about the lost Snow Elf Queen Erelia, but Diamond feels pity on the Snow Elves. Even if they had insinuated the battle, that still wasn't enough reason for the Nords to go on their genocidal campaign and practically exterminate the entire race.
Gods, she can't even imagine what Erelia must've witnessed, or perhaps her brother the Snow Prince. Erelia was there for the slaughter of her parents, and practically her kind during the middle of the war, but the Snow Prince – even when he was a general of the army – he had lost his entire family, and then he watched his entire race get massacred.
How could men find it in their hearts to do something so . . . inhumane and find honor in it? Even if conspirators say that the Snow Elves started the war, it's a childish excuse when it comes to the extermination of the species.
Maybe that's the reason that's fueling the rebels and their support. The Nords think they did it for honor, and yet to others: to the Khajiit, to the Imperials, to the Brentons, the Redgaurd, to the Dunmer, the Bosomer and Orcs and Argonians, they only did it because they were not of Nord blood. They only did it because Skyrim is 'their' land.
It was said that the Snow Elves were a wealthy and prosperous race. They said to have inhabited Skyrim before the Nords even settled. Wonder where the history went wrong in that . . .
But still, even Diamond has to admit that it is hard to picture a Snow Elf ruling upon the throne of Skyrim. Probably because she, like most others, can only picture the Falmer when mentioned the name Snow Elf. The vile creatures are all that remains of the Snow Elves, and while they seem to have vast numbers, their sour attitudes leave them less than desirable.
Erelia is our only hope. Skyrim needs her. Dabiyrrya had said.
What would they call Erelia? Snow Elf? Falmer?
Diamond remembers Kodlak telling a story about how the Snow Elves had powers beyond that of mortal imagination. While the family tree of the Glendeylin family is beyond faint in her brain, Diamond could still remember how they were the most powerful bloodline of elves in their species.
They were a powerhouse. A bloodline so mighty that other kingdoms had lived in terror of the day the House of Glendeylin would come to claim their lands. But they never did. They stuck to their borders, killing those (Nords) who refused to leave.
Diamond lowers her sweet roll, suddenly with a loss of appetite.
Could things be better with Erelia on the throne? Would she even want it? – would she want to rule on the throne of the ones who had butchered her kind?
Leaning back in her seat, Diamond rotates her finger around the lip of her goblet. The faint ring chimes in her ear.
What would happen if she were to join the rebels? It's a silly idea, a deadly idea, but it seems like Erelia is having a lot of support, and with Princess Nassari seemingly in support, she already seems to have an army at her disposal. But how are they getting anything done without their actual leader there to support them. Others claimed to have met her already and know for a fact she is in support of reclaiming the throne, but there's still something . . . missing.
"Something bothering you, little cub?" Kodlak asks.
Diamond looks up and finds that he has moved, his book still at his original seat. She must've looked as far gone as she felt. She blinks, trying to get herself refocused. She looks to Kodlak who is leaning one elbow.
"Just thinking too much." She says, taking the goblet and sipping it. The sweet taste of berry flavored ale hits her tongue.
"Might I ask what about?"
Diamond looks to him, folding in her lips. Then she simply gives a shrug of her shoulders. Kodlak smiles at her.
"You know, no one is stopping you from visiting her. Last I checked, her gates are open." He says.
"I just don't know if it's my place." Diamond says, her gaze upon the fire as it crackles. "I mean, I haven't forgiven her, I don't know if I ever can. And yet she hasn't said she's sorry despite her efforts."
"Diamond, she is sorry. I just don't think you've given her the opportunity to say it to you."
"Yeah. It's just a vicious circle."
"A circle that you can break. Yet you refuse not to. Out of what, pride?"
"No, it's just – I feel like she needs to say sorry first. As childish as that may be, I deserve it. And she owes it to me."
"Does she?"
Diamond looks to him. "What?"
"Excuse me." Kodlak says, rubbing his pointer finger along his chapped lips.
"No, no what did you say? Are you defending her?"
"Even if I am, understand it is out of fairness."
"Fairness?!" Diamond shouts. Kodlak immediately hushing her as some faces turn to them. With a wave of Kodlak's hand, they turn away. Diamond tries to keep her voice in check. In result, she hisses a whisper. "She destroyed my entire faction. She killed everyone and betrayed me! If she can so easily do that – throwing away everything we ever shared together – then why would I care about her either?"
"Perhaps she did it for your own good?"
"And why would she do that? I mean, yes I didn't feel as respected among the Brotherhood, but it was just as I was feeling like I was fitting among them did she kill them all."
"She didn't kill them. The Faceless did."
"Same thing."
"Did you see her in the Sanctuary?"
"No, but she gave away the location. She was there with Commander Maro when I was fleeing the banquet. And that's enough for me." Diamond growls. All of this talk is just riling up her anger just as it was getting extinguished.
"Did you even bother to ask her about her reasons?"
"No," Diamond says softer. "I was so upset that I didn't care."
"Well, I did."
Diamond looks to him, hurt etching across her features. She remembers hearing Libby and Kodlak speaking before, when Libby wore that opal dress (of which she cannot find anywhere here in Whiterun. It must've been from Elsweyr) She didn't know how long they've been talking, and Kodlak knew Diamond was there, but didn't usher her away. It must've been some time while Diamond was away on the hunt.
"What" – a cough makes Diamond clear her throat. "What did she say?" Diamond asks.
Kodlak stares at Diamond for a moment, swallows, then sighs. "I'm afraid it is not my place to tell."
"Kodlak, come on!" she whines.
Kodlak rolls his eyes, but Diamond watches as he ponders. His face softens, and her heart sinks when he sees his eyes glistening with . . . tears? What did Libby tell him? More importantly, what did she tell him that she couldn't tell Diamond?
Then again, she thought she knew everything about Libby before. Perhaps there's more than Diamond is ready to know. . . Kodlak then sighs. "I suppose you were to learn sooner or later." He mumbles, almost barely audible. "Am I am here to lead you along your path, I suppose."
"Kodlak?" Diamond whispers.
Another sigh. "From what Libby had told me, from what she wanted to disclose, she was wandering on her own long before she joined the Guild." Diamond leans back, folding her arms. "After her father was brutally murdered, she was forced to flee. She was driven to the River Yorgrim and a traveling Khajiit caravan found her, and helped navigate her to Riften."
"That's it?" she's heard that story before.
"No." Kodlak bluntly answers. What makes Diamond's skin crawl with goose skin is the fact that he seemed so cold about it. "That's what you had learned."
Learned?
"In the truth, Zusa, was the one who had found Libitania by the riverside half-frozen, nearly dead. She took Libitania in and raised her up until her adolescence, molding her into a killing machine. Then when she was fourteen, she let Libitania travel to Riften to take her position in the Guild."
"But Mercer. Libby had said he murdered her father." Diamond says.
"He did. And when he saw Libitania return, you could guess he was less than happy."
"He knew who she was." Diamond remembers Libby often telling her, or more often seeing the fear in Libitania's eyes whenever she saw Mercer Frey. But Diamond could also see an underlying anger and hatred in Libby's eyes. So absolute that the ring of gold around her eyes would practically glow. "But he never attacked her."
"Because the Guild was at her back. When they discovered Libitania, by then Mercer had already told the story of how Karliah had murdered Gallus. So when she emerged, he had his eyes on her and planned to kill her again. He just needed an opportunity."
"And then Libby actually made a plan with Karliah to expose the truth about Mercer to the Guild." Diamond finishes.
"And only now did Libitania just paid off her debt to Zusa Phoenix, avenged her father, and freed herself from the debt of Skyrim."
"So, you're saying she did all of this to protect me? How in the hell did she protect me? She destroyed my faction, she let them keep me prisoner! She didn't even help me escape when Veera and Malee–!" Diamond claps her hand over her mouth, just in time to trap a sob in her throat. Gods, how is it her body always reacts like this just from the mention of his name?!
"Diamond, it is not fair for you to blame her for some of those things." Kodlak says, and frighteningly enough, Diamond almost wants to rake her nails down his face. "While you were held captive, she did see you, she had planned to get you out, but Zusa swamped her with missions and contracts to the point she was neck deep in papers."
"You mean money."
Slam!
Diamond jolts in her seat as Kodlak's fist pounds into the top of the table. She looks to find his face grim, his lips pressed tight and his face etching with anger. Heads of the Companions have turned. "Diamond, your stubbornness is what amused me during your training, but it's the one thing that is making me want to put you on shoveling duty for months."
"What . . .?" Diamond breathes.
"All those years in training with the Brotherhood, then with me and the Companions, it is surprising to think you do not see. Has your faith in your friend dropped that much?"
A spark of anger – not, a fire of anger. So much for trying to keep things quiet. "Yes, it did because when I thought knew everything about her, she goes and reveals that she had a completely different life and led to the destruction of my faction!"
"She didn't have a choice, Diamond." Kodlak says deeply. His voice sending a chill down her spine. "She was in debt to Zusa for everything she did, and when she found you in there, she had tried everything in her power to stop you, but Zusa sent her on missions because she knew!"
Diamond stiffens and swallows.
"Zusa knew the connection between you and Libby without even consulting Libby about it. So she sent Libby on missions so she couldn't do anything to help you! She had no choice, Diamond."
I didn't have a choice!
"Why are you even defending her?!" Diamond shouts, shooting up from her seat. "You've know her for months, I've known you for years! But then she comes along and within short time, everyone seems to like her now! You're just like her! You just throw away everything we had for something or someone else!"
Diamond's stomach sinks the moment the words escape her lips. She wanted to keep being angry, but tears are streaming down her cheeks. Kodlak is staring at her, his face so cold it would put any expert assassin to shame. It freezes Diamond to the core, and she almost wants to drop on her knees and say she's sorry.
Slowly, Kodlak rises from his seat. The chair softly groaning against the floor. "I do not favor her more than you Diamond, there are things in her face, in her eyes, that I can see. Things that I can understand."
"And things I can't?"
"No." he says, his voice almost making her cringe. "You might think you've been through hell, but as much as you don't want to hear it, Libitania has been through so much more, I can assure you. And the reason you don't understand is because you are not ready. Libby did everything because she cares."
"You say that all the time! What do you see in her? When can I prove to you that I'm ready?!"
Kodlak gives her a dead stare. "When you stop acting like a child."
He then proceeds to leave the table ever so calmly, walking with a grace that was honed by expert years of training. He has his hands behind his back, and he doesn't look over his shoulder back at Diamond.
Eyes soon return to her when Kodlak exits into the living quarters. Some return to her, others simply lower their head, probably still in the shock of hearing Kodlak grow so cold. Diamond is still standing in front of her seat. Tears are streaming down her cheeks as the word constantly repeats in her head.
Child.
Child.
Diamond carefully, slowly, woodenly, walks her way out towards the back porch and simply sits down in her chair. The cold doesn't even bother her even though there's at least an inch of snow on the ground.
She wants to scream, to cry and scream and destroy everything in her path. She wants to walk right up to Libby's mansion and scream at the stupid itch on how she ruined Diamond's life once again. She wants to roar to the heavens, to the Divines that it's all her fault.
And yet . . . could he be right?
What difference would it make? Has Kodlak given up on her? If she just keeps sitting around and being angry all the time at Libby, what will it accomplish? Libby was practically raised by Zusa with the Faceless before Zusa let her go to the Guild, and when Zusa discovered Diamond, she wanted Diamond. Kodlak had said Libby tried to help, but Zusa found out about their friendship, and sent Libby out on mission after mission. Perhaps she couldn't resist because of fear of Zusa? Or because she had threatened Diamond's life?
And even after Libby left, Zusa had her sent to Cidhna Mines as punishment. And there, there Libby was whipped and beaten and tortured by the guards for her crimes all across Skyrim.
Diamond doubles over, bracing her head between her hands. She sighs, tears still streaming. She wants to scream but she can't, because it would be – childish. So she grips her hair, tightly, enough to give her a headache. Tears flow more and she tries to breathe.
But she just cries. Cries and cries and cries. When was the last time she had a moment like this? Let her tears flow freely and with them the pain and agony sliding off her cheeks.
It's not that she hasn't cried, she hasn't let herself cry since . . . since the Brotherhood? No, probably since the Faceless. Since she watched Maleek –
Diamond sighs. What is she to do now? Go to Libby? Act more open with Libby to prove to Kodalk she can be an adult?
Finally releasing her hair, her follicles relaxing with gratitude, Diamond sits up and crosses her legs. She pushes her hair back, she wipes her eyes with the heels of her hand. Still more pool down her cheeks.
Behind her, the door softly opens and careful steps approach her. Footsteps approach her, stopping just behind her, and no words come. Aggravated her voice comes out harsh, regardless of who it is as she says, "What do you want?"
"To see if you were okay."
Diamond nearly wants to smash her head into the wooden post to her left when she hears the voice belonging to Vilkas. And it certainly didn't help in calming down her anger she's ready to just unleash on the next dumbass that she comes across.
"Why do you care?"
"There was just something in your eyes when Kodlak –"
"I don't want to talk about it anymore."
Nonetheless, Vilkas steps around to her front, pulling up a chair next to her and sitting down. Not exactly facing her upfront, but slightly turned out so he can look out into the courtyard. He doesn't say anything.
"You don't have to stay." Diamond says, lifting her legs and hugging her knees.
"I want to."
"Why?"
Vilkas looks to her, his eyebrows furrowing. "Because there's something off about you right now. And I saw it the same day that I had, that I had called you a child."
Diamond winces at the word. How is that one word her weakness? Why does it make her shrivel up, yet fuels her anger like fuel?
"And I wanted to apologize. For what I had said. You just, do things to me."
"Oh, how flattering." She says flatly.
"You know Diamond, do you have any idea how highly annoying when you become withdrawn when things don't go your way." Vilkas then says. Diamond turns her head away, keeping her mouth shut. "It's immature and that is what Kodlak is trying to tell you. You are acting like a child, sitting around pouting about things that happened in the past when you could be moving on with your life, putting them all behind you. Yet you're hanging onto this anger hoping that everyone will feel sorry for you and gang up on Libby."
"Like I haven't suffered so much? Do you have any idea how annoying it is that everyone feels sorry for the person who ruined my life?!"
"She didn't ruin your life, Zusa Phoenix did. And he's not taking her side over yours, he's just wise enough and mature enough to listen to both sides of the story and understand why things happened the way they did. He said Libby tried to help you, she wanted to help, but Zusa got in the way. It was Zusa who captured you and turned your faction against you. It was Zusa who knew about your friendship and kept sending Libby away so she couldn't help. It was Zusa who killed your friends!"
Diamond retracts. Oh gods, there he is again – those sapphire blue eyes shining in the darkness.
"It was all her fault that everything happened to you! But because you're too afraid to go after her, you just settle for bullying Libby because she's the most convenient."
"Bully her?! She was there on the emperor's ship! She –"
"Admit it Diamond, you have no excuse! She tried to help you, but she couldn't. Because you and Zusa wouldn't let her."
Finally Diamond screams. Her throat quickly becoming raw from its power. It echoes throughout the courtyard, springing her up from her seat. She takes her chair and hauls it across the courtyard. It smashes against the wall, breaking into splintered bits. "This is so unfair!"
"Unfair? How?"
"Because finally I had reason to believe that Libby was not perfect!"
A moment of silence and more tears are falling. "Perfect? What do you mean?"
"All the time Libby and I were together, she was always the smart one, the skilled one, the one who could pay off any guard! Even when she's the bad guy, everyone just loves her and thinks she can do no wrong! She was always so fucking perfect!" Diamond screams, more tears coming from the pain in her throat. "And to everyone else I was always the kid who did nothing but screw around! Well I am mature, and I've proven that I can take care of myself since I was young!
"But no! Apparently, I'm still the child, and Libby is the perfect little bitchy assassin who can do no wrong, and has had a horrible life that justifies all of her wrongdoings!"
She collapses. Her knees just fall beneath her and the snow-covered pavement is bracing her knees. Her chest is heaving and her voice is struggling between a scream and a sob, in turn creating an ugly noise that doesn't sound human.
Her shaking hands cover her mouth, she tries to will her body to stop, but not that she's gotten her breakdown in motion, it's as if her body is taking the opportunity to let everything all out.
All of her pain and suffering that has since made her grow numb and crack open a deep abyss that has no end and is full of darkness. Her care of Vilkas seeing her is gone with the wind, and the ache of hearing Kodlak – the Harbinger she's loved more than anyone in the world – calling her a child wracks her body.
She's so numb from her crying, her cheeks tingling her brain barely registers the surprise as she feels Vilkas' thick arms wrap around her and pull her close to his chest. He isn't wearing his usual armor so his chest is so warm, despite her knees frozen to the bone. And he's wearing the jacket she unknowingly borrowed. She sobs over and over, her body shaking like a leaf.
"It's unfair." She nearly whines. "It's so unfair."
Vilkas rubs her back and her body tingles when she feels his callus fingers gently caress her cheek, wiping away her tears. "I know. But who ever said life was fair?" He coos to her. "I'm sorry you think no one understands you. You've been through a lot, we all know it. In fact I think it's one of the reasons why we all admire you."
Diamond carefully angles her head up to see Vilkas' warm eyes staring down at her. His face looks relatively cleaner, and his five o'clock shadow is emphasized by the overcast above.
"You've been through so much, and you're still so young. But holding onto the anger of the past is not going to be beneficial for you. You can't expect everyone to hold onto pain like you do."
Diamond sniffles, wiping away another tear, and rubbing her arms.
"You know what Kodlak told me? The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today –" his finger is underneath her chin and he tentatively lifts her eyes to his. "– today is a gift. That's why they call it the present. You're still young Diamond, and you are going to have many more hardships in your life. I'm afraid this is only the beginning for you. But you are also going to have many more blessings and memorable experiences. So you can't give up."
Despite herself, Diamond nuzzles into Vilkas' chest further, savoring his warmth in fear it'll go away in seconds and he'll be telling her he'll make her run three miles for acting like such a whelp. But instead, he embraces her further, resting his cheek on the top of her head. His breath warm against the back of her neck.
Her breath hitches as she feels Vilkas' callus fingers brush her cheeks. Her shoulders quiver and Vilkas holds her tighter.
"What do I do now? If I can't be angry, what am I supposed to do?"
"That's up to you Diamond. I'm sorry, but I don't think I can help."
Diamond sighs. "I hope Kodlak can forgive me."
"I'm sure he will. Come on Diamond, you know him." Vilkas chuckles. "He can't stay mad at you. Not if you show him reasons not to."
Diamond gives a small smile. She knew everything that's happening; she knew how close Vilkas was holding her, knew how badly she wanted to wrap her arms around him. Knew how she almost didn't want to move because she didn't want to ruin such a warm moment with him.
But her knees are numb and her body is still crawling with goosebumps. So she leans away and rubs her eyes. "I need to go." She says.
"Will you be alright?" Vilkas asks as the two of them rise up from the snow.
"Apart from having to change pants, I think I'll be fine." To her surprise, Vilkas actually smiles with a chuckle. Diamond fixes her hair, massaging her scalp before turning to Vilkas. "Are my eyes red? Do I look like I've been crying?"
Vilkas stares at her, tilting his head slightly to the side. The corners of his mouth turn upwards, and Diamond prepares herself for the onslaught of verbal insults. But instead, Vilkas says, "No. You look tough as nails."
The words are so familiar, but at the same time so forgotten that Diamond goes rigid. Against the white background of the snow, through the flurry of the flakes that fall from the sky, Vilkas' face blurs – and replaced with sapphire blue eyes, sunshine golden hair, and small black inklings of a tattoo that wraps around his bicep.
Diamond's eyes water again as she sees the background blur into her old room of the Faceless headquarters, and there . . . there is Maleek.
Maleek.
Standing there, dressed in a grey tunic that shows his extraordinary muscles and where the collar dips low enough to show tendrils of that tattoo.
"No." he said. "You look tough as nails."
He takes a step forward, and like a fog clearing, he is gone. His face, his eyes, everything is whispered away like mist in the wind. And there is Vilkas again, approaching.
Swallowing back her squeak, Diamond doesn't know what to think when Vilkas takes her chin again in his hand and tilts her head up.
Her body practically flares to life when she feels his lips on her forehead. And then her cheek. Rigid but also weak, Diamond's one hand reaches up, grasping Vilkas' firm bicep – the muscles feeling like a rock covered with skin. When his lips leave, he rests their foreheads together, his hand drifting to cradle the nape of her neck.
Diamond makes herself step back carefully. She looks up to Vilkas, well aware of her gleaming eyes. "Thank you Vilkas." She whimpers.
Without waiting for a response, she turns on her heels and heads inside the hall. She returns moments later, wearing her pink fur-lined cloak as Vilkas is heading inside. She passes him, giving a reassuring but small smile as they pass. She brushes her fingers against his for a moment, wanting to remember the callus feeling and remember it comforted her.
Then she pulls the hood up over her head and sets out into the snowy Whiterun.
Sitting at Nassari's desk in the princess's chambers in the castle, Libitania sighs as she looks over the map of the rebel's camps she bought off of Dabiyrrya.
After she and the Companions returned to Jorrvaskr, she left them without much of a goodbye. She didn't know why she needed to go Dragonsreach, but she just knew she needed to be in Nassari's company – to be with a friend she knew she could trust with such delicate but impactful information.
She has it. A map of the rebel camps. Rebels who are supporting Erelia Glendeylin – the lost heir of the Snow Elves.
This map is not leaving her sight, and she will protect this with her life. She doesn't even want to know the possibilities the Imperials or the Stormcloaks could do with this.
What had surprised her the most is how many of them there are. Each camp was marked with a red X, and some of them were even overlapping they were so close, many possibly being hidden in secret gardens or grottos or caves.
Strangely, she almost felt obligated to share this information with Nassari. After hearing the reasons why that Stormcloak bastard sent a Faceless assassin, and hearing Nassari herself speak of Erelia, the admiration in her eyes, it would almost be wrong not to.
As of now, the princess is freshening up in her bathing chamber after she came back from a ride with Jarl Balgruuf. Libby had personally let herself in through the princess's balcony, not wanting to wait around for some servant to show her the way. She nearly scared the fur off of Nassari when the Khajiit princess found her sitting in the armchair by the fireplace. After a laugh and hugs were exchanged, she disappeared into the bathroom to bathe.
Listening to the splashing and pouring water, Libby taps the tip of her pen against the map surface.
This is it. She knew every spot where the camps were posted. She knew all of their locations, right down to the very stone set on the earth, and yet, she hasn't even made the slightest attempt to go out and search them.
She argues with herself because she's worried they'll shoot her on sight, or try to capture her, but she knew her real reasons. She was nervous, afraid.
What could she do? What place does she have doing with all of this information? She's just an assassin. What originally was a simple plan to find out about the existence of the supposed lost heir to the Snow Elves, has now become a form of . . . obsession with the rebels and what they plan to do to overthrow both the Imperials and the Stromcloaks.
Can she really do it? Can she really rise up her own army powerful enough to overthrow both ruling factions? It would seem everyone is more than willing to fight for her. But will she be willing to rule over the thrown? There will still be those who oppose, but that's just how the humans are.
Libby chuckles, listening to herself. Humans. How humans are. Because it's clear that Khajiit, Orcs, Argonians, and Elves all support Erelia, it's just a matter of the mortals', humans' opinion.
The sound of the lock of the bathroom door makes Libby twitch in her seat. She looks over her shoulder to find Nassari walking out with steam belching behind her. She wears a warm, cotton robe, towel drying her fur. She looks to Libby and smiles – and Libby curses herself for not putting more effort into her return smile.
Because now, "Is something the matter, Solantir?"
Libby looks to her unsure on how to respond. She parts her lips to say something, but clamps it shut. "It is complicated." Libby mumbles in Elsweyr.
Nassari drapes the towel over the back of the chair she sits down in, pressing her robs flat against her bum. As she's sitting, Libby inconspicuously shifts her multiple papers to cover the map of the rebel camps.
"What seems to be bothering you, my friend?"
Libby looks to her friend for a few heartbeats before she abruptly gets up from the chair and heads to the large windows, pulling shut the curtains.
"Libitania –"
"Please, just take a seat and I will explain. But it is not for everyone's ears." Libby says, hoping her eyes look as desperate as she feels as she looks to the princess.
Nassari seems to understand and actually assists Libby by closing the door to the chamber, and then closing the bedroom door, locking it securely. It takes Libby seven minutes to search the spacious suite for any spyholes or signs of danger; seven minutes for her to lifts the framed paintings on the stone walls, tap at the floorboards, seal the gap between the door and the floor with her weatherworn cloak, and close the drapes to each of the windows, locking them in place.
When she is certain that no one can either hear or see them, Libitania walks back over to the desk and takes back her seat. Once comfortable, she raises her palms to the princess. "Okay, look, before I begin, you just need to know that what I am about to tell you, it is highly confidential information and can put your life in serious risk."
"Comforting, Libitania."
Libby doesn't smile. "I'm serious Nassari. It is risky, and I'm sorry, but I feel you need to know." The princess nods and stiffens in her seat, her hands gripping her knees.
As succinctly as she can, she tells Nassari what she had encountered when rescuing Kodlak from the Silver-Hand.
She first explained her own backstory with Dabiyrrya and how she had to expel her from the Guild, and then went on to explain how she had formed her own little deal with the Prince of Morthal, using the money she had paid him off to hire the Silver-Hand thugs to try and kill Kodlak. She tells Nassari about how Dabiyrrya was really trying to earn enough money to join the rebel forces in support of Erelia, hoping to gain respectable armor and weapons. The clock chimes midnight by the time she finishes telling Nassari about the final arrow she'd fired at Dabiyrrya, and how she had given her a small ransom in gold before firing what would have been a killing shot. When she stops speaking, Nassari's eyes are bright with sorrow and wonder.
"Nice to hear the prince is spending your return money wisely."
Libitania shrugs. "Tell me about it. But I'm afraid there is one more thing."
Nassari's brows rise. Libitania sighs, her heartbeat pounding against her ribcage as she turns to the desk, slipping the map of the camps out from under the pile of papers. She goes and sits in the next available armchair, sprawling the map across the glass coffee table between them. Nassari's eyes narrow trying to read the map and find a connection with the random X's scattered across the map. Some clustered in places and looking like red ants.
"This is a map of the rebel camps." Libby quietly murmurs. Nassari's eyes widen and Libby could've sworn the color drained from her furry face. "I bought it off of Dabiyrrya for the three bags of gold. I'm assuming she had the closest locations memorized enough to give it to me. No questions asked."
Nassari snorts. "No wonder you expelled her from the Guild. What member would be so careless?"
"Maybe someone who has faith in me." Libby says, her face aiming towards the fire.
"It seems rather sweet." Nassari says as she leans closer to the map."
"Or perhaps foolish."
Nassari's head sharply turns to Libitania, her eyes wide and suddenly feral. "Libitania, you don't plan on –"
"No," she answers. "I just, I don't know what to do with it."
"Well you bought it for some reason. Does this mean you support the rebels?"
Libitania grows rigid, her breathing catching in her throat. Her chest shakes as she inhales. "I, I don't know." she says as she deflates into her chair.
"How do you not know?" Nassari asks softly. "You bought a map with the locations of each and every one of the rebel camps in Skyrim. This is a dangerous tool that could end the entire war. If you refuse to give it to Ulfric or general Tullius, then what other explanation is there?"
"It's just . . . it's complicated, Nassari." Libby says, her voice quaking.
"There's nothing complicated about it. It is the difference between right and wrong. What started out as you clarifying the existence of Erelia Glendeylin, has now turned into you following the rebels every move. What business do you have with them? Are you only hoping to make profit?"
Ice shoots through Libitania's veins. "This has nothing to do with the Guild."
"Then why else are you burying yourself and perhaps even, burdening yourself with this information?"
"I – I don't know!"
She really doesn't. She's asked herself that question a million times, but she always comes up with no answers. Libby rises from her seat, trying to control her rapid heartbeat. She begins pacing in front of the fireplace.
"Maybe it's just, I'm curious." Libitania sighs. "Like, what if she's not ready for such a responsibility like ruling over the entirety of Skyrim? In fact, what if she'll never be ready for it? And she hasn't even spoken a word, so of course the rebels are going to assume she's in allegiance, but please who could really have seen the lost heir to the Snow Elves?"
"Do you not understand her importance in this war, Solantir? Erelia has given Skyrim and her people hope." Nassari says as she rises from her seat. "I haven't seen such a thing . . . ever, in my time. The stories I had been told by my guards," the princess pauses, her throat tightening as she thinks of her beloved men now resting in the cold earth. "Creatures all across of Tamriel are singing in jubilance, banding together to ensure she shall rise. That kind of brotherhood, sisterhood, I didn't even know it could exist among different kinds. I was once told an Orc saved a Dunmer, and an Argonian and a Bosomer clanked mugs in song of her."
For some odd reason, Libitania wants to cry. "I just, I don't know what to do. I was never raised to be a political person, and I'm just worried that the rebels are using her for their own advantage."
"Do you have so little faith in people?"
"Apart from you, I haven't been proven otherwise."
"Then what will you be a part of, Libitania?" the princess asks, stepping towards the assassin. "Who will you stand for? Or will you only stand for yourself?"
Her throat aches, but Libitania force herself to speak. "Now that I'm finally free, I'm scared, okay? I am scared, Nassari! I am scared that if I get involved I could wind right back in the mines or I could end up on the butchering block and so could you. I know what I told you is dangerous, and I know where you stand after what had happened to your people, but I've seen enough death in my lifetime, and I don't want to be a part of that?"
"So you're just going to let Ulfric keep dividing Skyrim into a racist country? You're going to just let General Tullius keep allowing the Thalmor to rule over certain kingdoms with an iron fist? When will you say enough, Libitania?"
Nassari stalks to her, grabbing her by the wrists.
"What will make you stop running and face what is before you? If the suffering of other people won't make you take action then what will?"
"I am just one person Nassari." Libitania's eyes are watery now.
"One person who survived Cidhna Mines – one person who avenged the death of her father, one person who despite all odds is still breathing." Despite her seemingly tight grip, Nassari's hand is gentle as it touches Libitania's chin. Up this close, she's a little more than self-conscious to have the princess see all of the scars that map her body. "You are a survivor, Solantir. It is written all over your body."
"Written into my skin, into my bones through an iron-tipped whip." Libitania almost sneers. "I don't care how strong you think I am, I don't – I don't want –" her lip quivers. "I don't want another scar." She nearly whines like a child.
"Maybe life isn't about avoiding the bruises, maybe it's about collecting the scars to prove that you survived. They tell a story, Solantir; a reminder of times when life tried to break you, but failed."
Libitania has to stop her lip from snarling. "You have no idea what sort of things I endured, Nassari; in and out of the mines. My life has basically been a living hell. And I can guarantee that if history dares to repeat itself, there is no force in this world that will be able to stop me. Not even myself."
Nassari doesn't seem to take any offense form Libitania's cold words. "I might not know what you endured, Solantir, but I know what my people endure in those mines, in those prisons every day. And I can only do so much. I need Erelia's help, in any way she can."
"You've never even met her."
"I wish I would've. I wish I could." Nassari takes Libitania's hand. "While it is a lot to ask you, if you're not doing all of this for yourself, then will you do it for me?"
"I thought I was." Libitania amuses with a ghost of a smile. She shrugs. "I suppose I could; it could put some use into my findings. And I won't really rust anyone else with this."
Nassari smiles. "Then I am honored. Just promise me, Libitania," Nassari says as she holds her hand. "That you will try and help me in freeing my people."
"Free Elsweyr?"
Despite herself and their conversation, oddly, but perhaps beneficially, it doesn't scare Libitania as much as she thought it should've.
So she looks to the princess and smiles. "I promise."
Seated in her chair atop her balcony, Erelia Glendeylin stares out across the wide plains. What once were green like emerald gems, are now covered in blankets of snow and ice. A world of fragile things. She only wears her evening gown. She doesn't feel cold though; it never mothered her anyway. It was in her blood.
As her heart beats in her chest, she can feel the power. The power that has been blessed in her bloodline for generations. The power that had nearly destroyed her as a child, and what nearly obliterated her kingdom before she received training.
By now it feels so foreign to her, but she can still feel it growing stronger. There are days when she worries it'll burst out of her like fire, evolving too rapidly for her to control. But with the practiced breathing she memorized from her mother, it only ebbs the flame into submission.
The power in her is strong. Stronger than even her parents ever realized. It sleeps in her heart. Pacing back and forth like an impatient monster ready to be unleashed.
Erelia sets her hand on her chest.
"When the time comes, when it awakens, I will help you my child." Her mother had promised, but she never lived to even see Erelia use her abilities.
And they had been the last words her mother ever spoke to her. And to this day, Erelia is still waiting.
She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath to calm her rapidly beating heart. The air around her grows warm. Her heart calms, but her hands are numb with cold.
Looking to her left, she finds the potted plant in the corner, the flower's petals singed around the edges, a small black ring encircles around her seat. But then intricate details of frost are crawling towards her like fingers.
"Stop." She whispers.
The crackling of frost increases. Ground louder like breaking bones.
"Stop!"
A loud crack and she feels small chipped bits tickle her legs. Looking down around her, the stone of her balcony has cracked, a large fissure snaking its way towards the flower pot.
Sighing, Erelia's eyes water. She is hopeless.
She wraps her arms around herself, the cold wind picking up the skirts of her dress and blowing them behind her.