Disclaimer: Don't own Glee. Wish I did.

Chapter Thirty Seven

Closer

The sunlight streaming through his window awoke Puck, the bright light hitting his face and burning through his eyelids. He rolled over, clutching his pillow, wanting to go back to sleep. Before he squeezed his eyes shut again, however, he willed one of them to stay open and consult his bedside clock; it was only 8 am. He groaned as he buried his head in his pillow, cursing the stupid sun for interrupting his dream. He dreamed of Kurt again last night. It wasn't a real dream; it was like a memory come back to life. He dreamt that he and Kurt were in his living room, the house empty save for the two of them. It had to be the first time he had Kurt over, because he remembered being embarrassed about the faded stains on the carpet, the dulling paint on the walls, and the chipped wood on the furniture. Kurt didn't seem to mind it, though. Kurt, while haughty, rude, and a fashion-obsessed diva, had this magical quality that allowed him to enter a room and, though he disapproved, would look around satisfactorily, singling out all the redeeming qualities of it, and pass favorable judgment over it. Puck felt this was how Kurt was with him in the beginning; he knew Puck was a dick, a liar, and just freaking bad news all around, but he looked past it to the good shit and focused on that. Puck missed that.

The dream went on, with Puck leading Kurt over to the couch, followed by a long, lingering make out session that had Puck humping his bed in his sleep. After that, they cuddled together, Puck enjoying the weight of Kurt's body on his own, rubbing the back of his neck as Kurt outlined the muscles on his chest through his shirt. He remembered in the dream that he was supposed to go to Quinn's house that particular afternoon, but he felt so content and comfortable with Kurt that he turned off his phone so she couldn't get a hold of him and just relaxed with Kurt, drifting into and out of sleep as Kurt's soft, melodious voice sang on about how obnoxious Rachel was in Glee, about how he was going to retake the SATs before he sent them off to any schools, about how he had to put in some time at the garage because he charged an insane amount of money to his dad's AmEx over a couple of scarves and a pair of pants. This was all months ago, but he remembered. He remembered everything about the time he and Kurt spent together, never more so than in his dreams; which is why he tried so desperately to get back there now.

It was useless, though. He was awake now. His rolled onto his back, his boner standing tall and proud. He played with it for a couple of seconds, flicking it down and slapping it from side to side. The attention only got it more excited, however, and so he set about relieving its ache. He paused for a beat, waiting to see if anyone was awake. It was Saturday, but the TV wasn't blaring and his ma wasn't yelling at him to get out of bed, so he figured they must still be asleep or out somewhere and he was clear. He stretched his body, his torso elongating and the tips of his toes pointing downward as he reached behind his headboard for the thing he used to jerk off that always ensured a great cum.

Drawing his arm back from his headboard he smirked as he held a pair of Kurt's old underwear. He stole it awhile ago; a long while ago, back when he figured that Kurt was going to take their relationship slow and he wasn't going to get any sex from him. So, in an effort not to have his balls explode from backed up semen, he figured he'd steal a piece of something of Kurt's that got to be so close to his ass. He figured he'd use it once and sneak it back into Kurt's dirty hamper where he stole it, but the first time he used it he knew he was hooked. It became like a security blanket to him; he couldn't let go of Kurt's underwear. He tried to give it back when they were still together, but Kurt was so goddamned virginal, and yet still a fucking cock tease, that he had to have it, if only to keep him from going insane. And then, when he dumped Kurt, he found himself pulling it out and grasping it, wondering if by holding it Kurt would think of him in that moment, and maybe he'd be forgiven for all he'd done. It was stupid magical thinking on his part, but it helped him sleep some nights, however brief or interrupted that sleep would be.

But then there were times like this, where he had an aching hard-on and he didn't feel like whipping out his obscenely large porn stash or dealing with his shitty wireless connection, so he let Kurt's dirty undies turn him on. And they never failed to turn him on. Sometimes just knowing he had them made his limp dick stand-up straight. So he draped Kurt's underwear over his face, inhaled deeply, and started stroking.

glee

After his quick jerk session (which ended with a couple of spurts to the face, but no one needed to know that) Puck took a shower and headed downstairs. He'd barely pulled his sleeveless muscle tee over his head when the doorbell rang. Tina and Quinn waved at him through the peephole as he sighed and let them in.

"What do you guys want?" Puck asked as he walked into the kitchen.

"We're here to strategize," Tina said as she and Quinn followed Puck into the kitchen.

"Yeah, now that Sam's out of the picture, and surprisingly it wasn't as dramatic as we all anticipated, Kurt's ripe for the picking," Quinn said.

"Thanks, but no thanks," Puck said as he poured himself a bowl of cereal and picked a dirty spoon out from the sink. Blowing it on it and wiping it on his shirt he dunked it in his bowl. "I think I'm going to fly solo on the whole "Get Kurt Back" thing."

"But – but, you need us," Tina said.

"Yeah, how do you expect to win Kurt over with, well, with all of that," Quinn said, motioning to Puck's body.

"What's wrong with all of this?" Puck asked, motioning to his own body through his mouthful of cereal. "Look at these guns," Puck said, flexing his right bicep. "These won Kurt over before, they'll win him over again." Tina and Quinn shared a quick side-eye before they addressed Puck again.

"Kurt's had a boyfriend, now. A real, do-gooder, boy next door, out and proud boyfriend," Tina reminded him.

"So?" Puck asked as he spit out some cereal and had milk dribbling out of his mouth.

"So," Quinn patronized, throwing a dishrag at his face because he was disgusting and she couldn't believe she actually went out with him, "you have to step up your game. The apology thing was inspired; we would never have expected that from you. But it didn't work, so you have to try something else."

"Like what?" Puck asked as he slurped the milk from his cereal, Quinn looking away distastefully.

"We came up with a list," Tina said, pulling out a legal pad. "One: quit smoking."

"But it's cool - ," Puck defended.

" – It's disgusting and it makes you look like white trash," Quinn said. Puck pouted as he considered her words.

"Two," Tina said, "ease up a bit. Let him breathe."

"That's a big one," Quinn said, nodding her approval.

"So, what, I can't hang out with him anymore?" Puck asked.

"Your definition of 'hanging out' and everyone else's is completely different," Tina said. "Normal people don't hang around their ex's locker, or their classrooms, or their cars."

"But he likes - ," Puck began.

" – No, he doesn't," Quinn said. "Tell him the third one, Tina."

"Okay," Tina said, looking anxiously at Puck before consulting the list, even though she knew full well what the third item was. "You have to…come out."

"Huh?" Puck asked, the room suddenly becoming very hot and uncomfortable to him.

"You heard her," Quinn said. "Come out. Be proud of who you are. Embrace your sexuality, and I don't mean grabbing a handful of your precious 'Puckzilla' in front of Kurt," she said hotly. "Kurt was with Sam, and the whole school knew it. Yes, it was hard for them, and yes they were teased and ridiculed and bullied, but at least they didn't have to hide who they were, constantly looking over their shoulder because they were scared someone was going to find out. They weren't afraid. They could look those idiot jocks in the face and tell them off. I know Kurt, and he's gotten used to that, and he's not about to go back."

"I c – I can't do that," Puck said. "I mean, no one knew about us before, so why does it have to be any different now? It could be just like the old times."

"I don't know if you remember, but those 'old times' you're referring to ended in heartbreak for everyone involved," Tina reminded him. "It's different now. Kurt's not the same person he was before."

"What are you talking about?" Puck asked. "He's the same old Princess."

"He's braver now," Quinn said. "He's not a damsel in distress. He's not going to put up with your crap." Quinn let her words sink into Puck's mind as the front door opened and Puck's mom and little sister entered the kitchen. Sarah Puckerman's stomping footsteps echoed throughout the house as she marched upstairs, obviously upset about something.

"Noah, didn't I tell you to take in the garba – oh, I didn't know you had visitors," Miriam Puckerman said as she set down a bag full of groceries.

"Ma, this is Tina, and you know Quinn," Puck said, unenthusiastically introducing his friends. Miriam smiled warmly, but Quinn knew her well enough that she could read when it was time to go.

"We were just on our way out," Quinn said, strapping her purse over her shoulder. "Think over what we said, Puck."

"It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Puckerman," Tina said, waving as Quinn hurried her out the door. Miriam waited until the door shut behind them before speaking again.

"Two girls, Noah," Miriam said as she unloaded the groceries. "Alone, in the house with two girls. You know how I feel about that."

"Geez, Ma, I didn't even know you guys were gone," Puck said. "And they were only here for a few minutes to drop off some music for Glee club."

"I didn't say anything," Miriam said. "You can have your fun now, just as long as you're safe and, in time, you marry a nice Jewish girl and give me lots of grandchildren. That's all I ask."

"I know, Ma," Puck said, turning away from his mother and gripping the countertop tightly. "I know."

glee

"So, he just, like, walked away?" Blaine asked, licking his spoon clean before going in for more ice cream.

"Yes," Kurt said, trying to eat his own Ben & Jerry's while lying down. They were both barefoot and on his bed, ignoring the DVD of Madonna: Truth or Dare that was playing silently on the TV in the background. They had spent nearly all morning in bed, their hair matted and their clothes rumpled, chatting first about Blaine and his lack of luck with Sebastian, and now, Kurt and Sam. "He said he still wants us to be friends, which, I'm still unsure of the veracity of that claim, but…yeah, he just walked off into the sunset, like a cute, blond cowboy from some Western film made back before the rainbow flag was even invented."

"Wow, that was very mature of him," Blaine said. "If the tables were turned, I don't think I could have been that forgiving."

"Gaga knows I wasn't when I was in his position," Kurt said as he scraped the bottom of his ice cream container. "Is there anymore Chunky Monkey?" Blaine shook his head and offered the rest of his Crème Brulee flavor which Kurt took appreciatively. "Thanks. But yes, I went ballistic on Noah when I found out he'd been with Quinn behind my back, and I expected Sam to do the same to me, and when he didn't…well, it felt a million times worse."

Blaine smirked as he reached for the ice cream that Kurt was spooning around lazily. As he dipped his spoon in he said, "You did it again."

"Did what again?" Kurt asked as he set his spoon on the nightstand.

"You called him Noah," Blaine said.

"I...did, didn't I?" Kurt said as he rubbed his eyes. "What is this hold this boy has over me?" he cried as he smothered himself with a pillow.

"Don't be so hard on yourself," Blaine shrugged. "But…"

"But what?" Kurt asked, the pillow muffling his voice.

"I think that little Freudian slip might be indicative of some deeper feelings you have for Puck," Blaine said.

"Are you just saying that so you can use me as a case study for your Intro to Psychology paper?" Kurt asked, letting the pillow slide from his face.

"I'm saying it because I'm your friend," Blaine said. "I think…maybeyoustilllovePuck," he said in one breath.

"I think…this isn't something I want to talk about," Kurt said, running a hand through his unkempt hair.

"It's okay, Kurt," Blaine said comfortingly. "You can't help who you love."

"But why does it have to be the scared, closeted jock who'd rather be popular than be with me?" Kurt nearly sobbed. "God, it sounds like the plot of some awful fanfiction. I've become a cliché."

"Who knows? Maybe your story will turn out differently," Blaine said.

"Or maybe I'll turn straight and give up this whole homosexual phase," Kurt joked. "I mean, yes, the clothes are fabulous, but the romantic entanglements are hardly worth the heartbreak." Kurt then turned to Blaine and stole the pint of ice cream out from his loose grip and scooped it greedily into his mouth.

"Kurt, whose car is that in the driveway? And you know how I feel about closed doors when you have a – oh, sorry Blaine," Burt said as he barged into Kurt's room. "I thought Kurt was up here with a boy," he said apologetically. Blaine looked down to his crotch, wondering if his penis had fallen off only to be replaced by a vagina that only Mr. Hummel could see. "I mean, a guy." Blaine stared back, a little hurt, as Burt continued to clarify. "I mean, you know, a man's man. Not that you're not a man, you know…Kurt, help me out here."

"Blaine, I'm sorry my father considers you less than masculine due to your homosexuality," Kurt said monotonously as he continued to lie on the bed with his eyes closed.

"Kurt!" Burt roared. "Honestly, Blaine, that's not what I meant. It's just, I thought you were a boy that was trying to take advantage of Kurt…"

"I know, Mr. Hummel," Blaine shrugged. "It's okay, I'm used to it by now. Parents don't really see me as threatening or being a bad influence on their kids. They see me more as some kind of baby penguin."

"Don't listen to them," Burt said. "You're as dangerous as a lion. And to show you how much I don't trust you, I'm going to keep this door open. Okay?" Blaine nodded with a smile while Kurt continued to lie as if in a coma.

"Dad, what are you doing here? Who's running the shop?" Kurt asked.

"Came home for lunch. Thought I'd let your brother try his hand at running the place for a bit. It was kind of slow and - ," Burt said.

"You left Finn alone?" Kurt asked, suppressing a chuckle. "With power tools and hydraulic lifts and oil and gasoline and welding equipment?"

"I trust him," Burt said pointedly. "He'll do fine."

"If you say so," Kurt said. "But if you see a big boom and lots of flashes of light coming from downtown, those aren't fireworks. It's Hummel Tires & Lube blasting into the stratosphere." Burt's face soured as Kurt spoke about the shop like that.

"Sorry about him, Mr. Hummel," Blaine said. "He's still a little upset about him and Sam breaking up."

"Understandable," Burt said. "And actually, this is the least snippy he's been these past few days. Whatever you're doing, keep it up."

"I can hear you, you know," Kurt said, his eyes still unopening.

"Oh, you can, can you?" Burt asked. "Well, when you want to come join us in the land of the living, you'll find a lot of neat stuff downstairs. Mercedes left twelve messages telling you to call her back, each one angrier than the last. Santana sent you a long, rectangular box that vibrates every time I tap it, no judgments there. Brittany sent you a homemade 'Get Well' card that nearly suffocated me with glitter when I opened it, and Rachel called to ask if you want her to come 'sit shiva' with you tonight, whatever that means. You got a lot of friends worried about you, Kurt."

"Dad," Kurt said, opening his eyes and staring straight at his father. "I'm fine. Is that all?"

"Uh…I feel like I'm forgetting something…" Burt said, taking off his cap to scratch at the back of his head. "Oh yeah. Puckerman's downstairs giving your car a good wax."

"What?" Kurt cried.

"Yeah, couldn't believe it myself," Burt said. "The same kid that nailed our furniture to the roof, downstairs polishing your car. You know, they should put a Glee club in the UN, maybe solve some of that unrest going on in the Middle East."

"Who does he think he is, polishing my baby," Kurt muttered, rolling out of his bed and running past his father downstairs. He stomped out of his house, swinging the front door open angrily, almost knocking Blaine, who was following him, onto his ass.

"Puck. PUCK!" Kurt screamed. Puck, shirtless and glistening under the afternoon sun, couldn't hear Kurt over the music blaring into his earphones. Kurt ripped them out of his ears and threw them onto the grass.

"Hey babe!" Puck said, throwing the towel over his shoulder as he went to hug Kurt. "Have I ever told you how sexy you look with bed head?" Kurt side-stepped the hug and instead crossed his arms, glaring menacingly at the half-naked boy on his driveway.

"What are you doing here?" Kurt hissed.

"I dropped by to say hey, when I noticed how butthole dirty your car is," Puck said. "Can't have my Princess driving around in a messy carriage, now can I?"

"Step away from the SUV," Kurt instructed. Puck stepped to the side as Kurt looked around. Blaine was standing on the patio, slack jawed and bug-eyed as he stared at Puck's bare chest. "Blaine? Some privacy?"

"Oh, right, sorry," Blaine said as he backed away into the house. "Can I just…real quick…" He snapped a photo of Puck on his phone before looking up guiltily to Kurt. "This isn't for me. It's for…a friend." He ran back into the house, Kurt ready to deal with him later.

"You know, Catterpillar Brows up there is really starting to grow on me," Puck said with a chuckle. He smirked as he ran a hand through his mohawk, his pectoral twitching and his bicep bulging as he stretched his arm up. He flashed a bright smile as Kurt stared on, unmoved.

"Stop doing that," Kurt said. "You're not posing for some pin up calendar. Just, go home, Puck."

"Well, actually I was hoping you and I could hang out later…" Puck said cautiously, testing the waters. "I mean, as friends, you know? No romantic shit or anything. Just, like, catch a movie or something."

"I don't think that's a good idea," Kurt said.

"Why not?" Puck asked.

"Because the last time we went to the movies you didn't want anyone to see us together so you had me sneak into the theater twenty minutes after the movie started," Kurt spat. "I completely missed the first song of Beauty and the Beast, and it was in 3D!"

"We don't have to go to the movies," Puck said. "We could get something to eat."

"Actually I think I've used up my daily allotted calories for the day," Kurt said, sighing as he remembered all the ice cream he inhaled with Blaine. "Besides, would you really be comfortable being seen with me in public?"

"Of course I would," Puck scoffed.

"I mean here, in Lima," Kurt clarified. "Not at some roadside diner half-an-hour outside of town."

"I thought you liked Sally's Burgers and Oil," Puck said. "You can get your oil changed while you eat!"

"And that sounds appealing to you?" Kurt asked. "Puck, the only reason you like that place is because no one goes there."

"So what?" Puck shrugged. "I like having you all to myself."

"You still don't get it, do you?" Kurt scoffed. "I'm not going to be your dirty little secret anymore, Puckerman! I am not going to stay closeted for you!"

"I'm not - ," Puck began, looking around worriedly, afraid someone would hear Kurt screaming, "I'm not asking you to stay hidden. I just…I just want to be with you."

"Then be with me," Kurt said, giving Puck the slightest bit of hope, "but be with me openly. Don't hide me, Noah. Stop…stop being ashamed of yourself."

"I…" Puck didn't know how to respond. Yes, Kurt called him Noah, and yes, Kurt stopped denying he was in love with him, which was a big step up from a week ago. But now there was an ultimatum, or at least Puck felt like there was, and it was the same piece of advice Tina and Quinn gave him earlier that morning: come out. Just thinking about it made him break out in a cold sweat. He shifted uneasily from one foot to the next, avoiding Kurt's gaze. "Kurt, I…I just – ."

"Don't say anything," Kurt said. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't force you to do something you're obviously not ready for." Puck absentmindedly reached a hand into the top of his shorts and scratched at his pubic hair, Kurt rolling his eyes at Puck's lack of manners. "Look, Noah, this is just…it's been a rough week. Sam and I just broke up, and I'm really not ready to start anything up again, especially when it's off to such a rocky start."

"Look babe, you're not forcing me to do anything," Puck said, his resolve strengthening. "You're right. I need to man up and just, you know, come out. I can do it."

"You say that now," Kurt said, going back inside his house, "but remember, you're still the same boy that pushed me across the room the first time we kissed." Puck scratched at his cheek as he remembered their first kiss during the same-sex duets competition all those months ago.

"I promise, babe! I'm going to come out and you'll be so fucking proud of me!" he screamed, not caring anymore if the neighbors heard. "Get the Diana Ross record ready, because I'm coming out!" Kurt slammed the door on Puck, allowing himself a quick smile as he rested his forehead against it.

"Did he just call you, 'babe'?" Burt asked as he came out of the kitchen. "Something you want to tell me?"

"Just a term of endearment, Dad," Kurt said as he walked briskly past his father. "Don't read too much into it." Burt stared unsurely at his son's retreating figure, knowing there was more to this situation than Kurt was telling him. But, Deadliest Catch was on, and he only had enough time to either watch that or talk to Kurt before he had to get back to Finn and the shop. Shrugging, figuring he'd talk to Kurt later, he reclined back in his chair and turned the TV on, turning up the volume as he heard Kurt and Blaine arguing upstairs about cell phones pictures and ex-boyfriends.

A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing! Okay, have you guys seen the new actors they just announced for season four? Hawtness. Google them as I describe them to you:

Dean Geyer is supposedly going to play an upperclassmen at NYADA who is, I guess, going to provide some romantic entanglements for Rachel.

Meanwhile Jacob Artest plays Puck's younger half-brother who apparently has his older brother's attitude when he gets recruited for Glee club. Now, they look nothing alike, but he's cute, so I'll stretch my imagination for now.

Aaaannndddd Chord Overstreet is finally a series regular! Remember, this was the main reason why he left at the beginning of season three, and this departure was thus the inspiration for another of my stories on here 'Just Enough Time' (read it, love it, live it).

Well, that's all the Glee updates for now. Oh yeah, I have to read Chris Colfer's new children's book. Has anyone read it? Is it awesome? If it isn't, lie to me. Tell me it's wonderful.

And if you're reading this author's note, I'm sorry for the headache you're feeling at my randomness. Excuse me while I self-medicate.