A/N: For anyone who might think otherwise, I'm not dead. At least I don't think so. Last time I checked, I was working on other projects. Still don't own Negima though. And in case anyone is wondering, apparently in Japan it's the girls that give the boys candy.

A Day Indoors XXXV

"Kotaro, why are you hiding in my closet?" Negi asked as he opened his door to find a small dog asleep on his dirty clothes.

The dog quickly shifted form changing into a young man about Negi's age… who was completely nude. "What are you doing here? I figured you'd be teaching class!"

"Well, it IS Saturday, but the headmaster said he was canceling school activities for the day because it was some sort of holiday or another. I thought I'd sleep in and then go catch up on some reading in the library. That still doesn't explain what you're doing though." Negi said tapping his foot expectantly.

"You mean you don't know? It's Valentine's Day you idiot!" The dog boy shrieked.

"What's that got to do with you sleeping in my dirty clothes?" Negi asked with rising alarm. He had just gotten up from bed himself and was wearing nothing but his boxers, his pajamas in his hand ready to be dumped in with the aforementioned dirty laundry.

"I'm hiding from Chizuru-ne." Kotaro confided looking around to see if the girl might somehow jump out at him from the dark corners of the room.

"And you don't want to be found because…" Negi prompted.

"It's Valentine's Day, when all the girls around here start looking to give candy to some boy they've got eyes for. Chizuru-ne brought some groceries to our room last night and for once didn't ask me to help unpack them. I could smell the chocolates though." Kotaro said uneasily.

"What's wrong with Chizuru giving you chocolates?" Negi continued, baffled.

"Well, you see I haven't really told her that I'm seeing Natsumi. If she comes up with chocolates I'll have to refuse and then she'll want to know why and then, well you know." Kotaro tried to explain.

"You'll be forced to talk about your emotions and confess your feelings before others of how you feel about the special someone in your life?" Negi finished for him.

"Yes, I'm not about to do something that unmanly." Kotaro retorted stiffly.

"So… hiding in my dirty underwear in the nude is…"

"Shut up, I can't wear clothes in dog form." Kotaro growled. "I figured that they wouldn't go looking for me in your room."

"Well, stay in the room if you want, but get out of my clothes hamper. It's seriously freaking me out." Negi said as he tossed his clothes into the closet.

Kotaro stepped out and Negi was just about to give him something to wear when the door to the room flew open and Negi turned to see Haruna and Yue shoving Nodoka into the room with a box of chocolates clutched to her chest as if it were the only thing she had to cover her breasts. The two matchmakers then turned to dart back out but stopped dead in their tracks as they happened to glance in and see Kotaro in the buff and Negi in nothing but his boxers.

"Um, Negi-sensei, are we interrupting something?" Yue asked with a tremor in her voice that was the only thing that betrayed her emotions.

"Oh… no!" Negi said waving his hands around quickly. "Kotaro was just coming out of the closet."

As soon as the words left his lips Negi realized that it was perhaps the wrong thing to say. Kotaro smacked his forehead, Nodoka spouted a nosebleed and fainted, Yue's face displayed more shock than he'd ever seen in his life, and Haruna was drooling.

"He didn't mean it that way!" Kotaro yelled as he smacked Negi across the back of the head. "I am not gay!"

"You two would make a pretty couple." Haruna drawled as she reached for her notebook.

"If you draw anything like I think you're going to draw, I will personally rip your heart out." Kotaro threatened as he lunged for the offensive pad.

Haruna however was quicker than he expected and closer to the door than he was so she was out into the hall and moving away at top speed before he ever got to the door.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU FOR THIS NEGI!" Kotaro roared as he took off after the artist.

"YOU WERE THE ONE THAT STARTED IT!" Negi shouted back getting ready to run after the boy when Yue grabbed his arm.

"Sensei… what you said, it was just a big misunderstanding wasn't it?" The young philosopher asked.

"I'm glad at least one person is able to keep a clear head around here. Yes Yue-san, it was a misunderstanding. Kotaro was literally in my closet this morning hiding from Chizuru. I am not gay." Negi affirmed to his partner.

"That's a relief sensei." Yue said bending down to pick up the box of candy that Nodoka has been carrying. "Nodoka wanted to give this to you today. She made the chocolates herself. Hold it while I get her moved over to the bed."

Negi gratefully accepted the chocolates and smiled as he quickly hugged Yue. "I should have known you of all people would understand the situation Yue. Let me help you get Nodoka."

A startled gasp brought Negi's and Yue's attention to the young librarian in the floor who had chosen that exact moment to regain consciousness. "Get me… Yue understands… Negi-sensei… Kotaro just…"

Negi snapped his head back to Yue in his arms and then back to Nodoka shaking violently in the floor. His head whipped back and forth a few times before Yue seemed to get a grip on what Nodoka was meaning.

"NO NODOKA IT ISN"T WHAT YOU THINK!" Yue screamed as she grabbed Nodoka by the arms just before the little librarian slipped back away into blissful unconsciousness with a fresh nosebleed.

"Let's get her over to the bed. We can explain things when she wakes up." Negi said desperately.

Nodding, Yue helped to get Nodoka to her feet. Negi got behind the girl and got his arms under her shoulders while Yue picked her up at the knees. Negi walked backwards toward the bed and tripped, sitting down hard.

Unfortunately, as he went down it was all he could do to keep from dropping Nodoka as he wrapped his arms around her protectively. He landed with Nodoka in his lap and unfortunately since Yue had been holding her knees she got pulled along for the ride, doing a face plant into Nodoka's abdomen.

"Negi-sensei, I was wondering if you had plans…" Ayaka gushed as she burst into the room. To see Nodoka in Negi's lap with his arms all around her breasts, and Yue looking up from where she'd landed.

"Oh no, not again." Negi moaned.

"What do you mean 'again'?" Yue asked incredulously.

"Negi-sensei…," Ayaka said on the verge of tears, "How could you? First I find you with Maki and Asuna in the shower and now I find you making out with these two!"

Before Negi could reply, Ayaka dropped the box of chocolates she'd been carrying and went running from the room with tears running down her face.

"Please, class rep, come back! I'll make it up to you!" Negi shouted after the fleeing girl.

"How, by letting her be in the next one?" Yue asked dryly.

"Yue, you should know this is all a misunderstanding you've actually been caught up in this one." Negi pleaded. "It was no different with Maki and Asuna; I just keep getting caught up in these completely outrageous situations one after another!"

"I believe you sensei." Yue said seriously.

"You do?" The boy replied with relief evident in his voice.

"No one could actually TRY to get into these situations like you do and come anywhere close to being this successful." The young philosopher continued.

"Thanks… I think." Negi said sitting there for a moment longer before getting up. With Nodoka now safely in Konoka's bed, Negi pulled the covers up to her shoulder. "I better put some clothes on before something else happens."

"It might be a good idea, I'll wait out here." Yue agreed.

Negi went into the bathroom and quickly changed into some of his more comfortable clothes. He tried his best to pick his least provocative clothing, so a T-shirt and cargo pants were his selection for the day.

"So where are Asuna and Konoka?" Negi heard Yue say from inside the other room.

"Asuna went to confess to Takamichi again and Konoka had something big planned for today with Setsuna." Negi said stepping out into the room at last fully clothed.

"I wonder how much Ayaka paid for these chocolates. They look imported." Yue said seriously as she examined the box.

"I guess I should go talk to her." The teacher said sorrowfully.

"You might want to reconsider that." Yue stated flatly as she stacked the chocolate boxes on the desk; Nodoka's on top of course.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, on today of all days you need to watch out for more of those 'compromising situations' you're always falling into. Now that I think about it, it's a miracle you haven't been fired already from the school. I was even involved with the elevator at Library Island now that I think about it. Not to mention the time the Baka Rangers got stripped…" Yue recalled beginning to list some of Negi's most embarrassing moments and counting them off on her fingers.

"Alright! I get it, I get it! What do we do? Every time I try to be a gentleman about these things it backfires." The magical boy genius complained.

"Then maybe we need to try the opposite. We're going to need some help though, come on!" Yue said as she grabbed Negi's arm and raced out into the hall.

It was hard to do. For so long she'd carried these feelings silently, but now she could hide it no longer. With her box of sweet mints lovingly wrapped in the most beautiful wrapping she could find the young woman opened the door to her beloved's room and crossed the floor to where they slept.

Wanting more than anything to be accepted, despite the difficulties such a relationship would no doubt face the girl knelt before the bed and softly cleared her throat.

With her eyes downcast, she could not bring herself to gaze upon the beauty of the one she loved more than life itself.

"Please. Please accept my love. I have brought these for you." Setsuna said holding out her box of candy to Konoka as she sat up in her bed.

Gentle hands took the box from her as she heard Konoka's sweet voice whisper, "Set-chan"… from behind her?

The winged swordswoman jerked her head up to see a stunned and confused Nodoka wordlessly moving her lips as she held the box of candy that Setsuna had given her. Setsuna slowly turned her head around to see Konoka standing in the doorway with tears brimming in her eyes. Words didn't even have time to form on her lips before the girl burst into tears and went running from the room.

"NNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!" Setsuna screamed jumping up to run for the door. She stopped herself just long enough to turn around and grab the box of candy from Nodoka before turning tail to chase Konoka down and make everything right.

"Setsuna, do you think I'm gay?" Nodoka asked quietly.

The question brought the demon girl to a screeching halt as she turned to look at the librarian. "It was all a misunderstanding Nodoka. I'm sorry; YOU'RE not the one I'm hoping is gay."

"I know that. It's just… I think Negi-sensei is gay and so is Yue." Nodoka said with tears nearly ready to fall.

Somehow Setsuna managed to run headlong into the door without opening it. "WHAT?!!"

"Kotaro confessed to Negi-sensei this morning, and I think Negi-sensei accepted him. Then I heard him tell Yue that he'd help her get me. Oh Setsuna, what am I going to do?!"

Setsuna growled under her breath. At this rate she might even have to take flight to catch up to Konoka. "Look Nodoka, I'm sure it was all just a grave misunderstanding, but if it wasn't I hope it's a trend! Now come on, you've got to help me tell Konoka the truth!"

With that Setsuna tore out of the room moving as fast as her legs would carry her. She had to get this all straightened out.

"So we need you to help hide him." Yue finished. The explanation had been a little sketchy concerning the morning's embarrassing moments, but hopefully it was enough to convince her audience of the need for their power.

"So let me get this straight, you want me to use my wand on Negi to put him in drag?" Chisame fumbled. "What kind of stupid idea is that?"

"Quite a good one actually." Negi agreed nodding his approval. "Since girls will be taking the initiative to give boys candy today it would seem hiding out amongst the enemy as it were might be my safest course of action."

"I don't know about the 'enemy' part, but hey, if it's a costume you need you've come to the right partner." Chisame said pulling out her card and rolling up her sleeve. "One rooster in chick's clothing coming up."

With a flash of light, Negi was replaced with a young schoolgirl. The uniform and wig were perfect and to be honest, he looked a lot like the time the girls had dressed him in drag at Halloween. Yue nodded her approval. "You do good work Chisame."

"Yeah, yeah, just get lost before someone sees you and I get wrapped up in the next disaster." Chisame said pushing the duo out the door and slamming it shut.

Negi looked down at his school uniform and tugged at the hem. "Remind me to speak to the headmaster about getting you girls some longer skirts. It's awful drafty in this thing."

"You get used to it." Yue quipped, smiling despite her best efforts. Maybe with this they'd be able to avoid any more stupidity.

The two 'girls' walked through the halls of the dorm as all kinds of girls went running by. Some where excited, some were heartbroken, and some were just running around for the sake of running around in the massive kaleidoscope of human existence which is life.

"It's working, I fit in here. I'm nothing more than your average everyday normal junior high girl." Negi whispered.

"Negi, what the heck do you call yourself doing!" Chizuru yelled loud enough for several blocks to hear.

"I'm hiding!" Negi whispered back trying desperately to shush the tall girl.

"From who?" Natsumi asked in astonishment. The two were walking back to their room happily talking. Chizuru was also carrying the box that had started it all.

"From everybody in the class, you know how things get when the girls start running around. It seems like chaos ensues and somebody ends up naked." Negi groused.

"I think I'll call it 'Love Rocket'!" Haruna yelled back over her shoulder as she skidded around the corner.

"I'll show YOU a love rocket!" Kotaro screamed as he rounded the corner, still naked, in hot pursuit of his antagonist.

"Oh no." Negi said as he sensed the impending doom.

"Ojou-sama! Please wait! I'm sorry; this was all just a misunderstanding!" Setsuna was screaming as Konoka came barreling around the opposite corner with her beloved Set-chan right behind dragging a flustered looking Nodoka.

"We tried." Yue sighed in defeat.

The crash came all in one swift motion. As much training as Negi had been given in the martial arts, he doubted even Evangeline could have managed to dodge the cascade of tangled limbs and people that ended up in a heap in the middle of the hall.

Negi's forehead had collided with someone else's and his wig had been knocked free, as if it had done any good. Negi opened his eyes to realize that for the first time in his history at Mahora he'd been knocked on his butt and now someone was looking up HIS skirt.

"Negi… sensei…" Nodoka sputtered looking up Negi's skirt at what he hoped were his boxer shorts.

Please let Chisame have left me my boxers. Negi silently prayed.

"Kotaro! You're after Haruna!" Natsumi cried.

"Yes I am, she… NO NATSUMI IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!"

"Negi-sensei and Yue ARE gay!" Nodoka suddenly bawled.

"I AM NOT!" Yue blurted with an unaccustomed burst of emotion.

"BUT I AM!" Setsuna screamed at the top of her lungs.

Everyone fell silent and looked at the stoic young woman as desperation and fear gripped her. She grabbed Konoka and pulled her into a kiss for all she was worth before she could get up and start running again.

Everyone stopped and stared as the two lingered in the kiss. When they finally broke the kiss, Setsuna looked into Konoka's eyes almost ready to cry. "Ojou-sama I am not giving this moment anymore opportunities to race out of control. Before anything else happens, I love you. Please accept my feelings before some other misunderstanding occurs!"

Konoka's eye were brimming with tears again as she gazed intently into Setsuna's eyes… and then fainted dead away.

"Was that a good thing or a bad thing?" Kotaro whispered over to Negi.

"It was a rather uncomfortably ambivalent response." Yue agreed.

"She didn't say no, that's good enough for me." Setsuna declared. "I'm getting Ojou-sama out of her before something ELSE can go wrong."

In a flash the flustered young girl had her beloved in her arms and was running away down the hall towards freedom.

"Well looks like that's all settled I'll just be slipping away now." Haruna said as she tried to crawl away.

"What were you doing with Kotaro?!" Natsumi demanded with a stormy expression on her face.

"Oh no, here we go again." Kotaro moaned.

"There's no help for it Kotaro, you've got to set this mess straight." Negi said looking at his friend.

"Okay, alright, that's IT!!" Kotaro yelled as he stood up. "I'm going to end this madness right now, once and for all! EVERYBODY LISTEN UP! I WANT EVERYONE IN THIS STUPID DORM TO HEAR WHAT I HAVE TO SAY! I LOVE NATSUMI-CHAN! I LOVE ONLY NATSUMI-CHAN!"

Kotaro stood there with his chest heaving as if he'd just fought the hardest battle of his life, a fierce countenance peering back at everyone daring anyone to say something about his relationship to Natsumi.

"See. I told you." Chizuru smiled as she handed the chocolates to Natsumi.

"Wait, you mean those were for Natsumi?" Kotaro said with his fierce expression switching to confusion faster than a schizophrenic bipolar on crack.

"No silly, they're for you, but Natsumi wasn't going to get you any because she thought you weren't into all that romantic stuff. So I got them for her and was bringing her to come find you so she could give them to you." The busty teenager explained happily as she helped Natsumi to her feet.

"But…" Kotaro risked a glance over at Negi where the other boy glared at him menacingly, at least as menacingly as he could wearing a skirted school uniform.

"Oh Kotaro, you've made me so happy." Natsumi cried with sparkles dancing across her eyes.

"But…"

"Well, I guess that settles everything. I think I'll go work on my manga. I've got a deadline to meet after all. I think first I'll have some ice cream though, all that running made me hot." Haruna said with a chuckle.

"But…"

"I think I'll join you." Chizuru said as Natsumi latched onto Kotaro's arm. "I think I'll give these two a little alone time. Let's grab Ayaka too, she went running by earlier and looked like she could use some comforting; wouldn't want her bursting into the room and spoiling the mood."

"But…"

"Let's head back to the room Kotaro-kun." Natsumi trilled as she turned her now officially and irrevocably branded live-in boyfriend back towards their room.

Kotaro sighed and gave in to the inevitable and fell into step beside his now official and permanently attached to his arm girlfriend and tried very hard not to look at Negi or anyone else for that matter. "Yeah, it'll be good to get into some clothes."

"Who said anything about getting dressed?" Natsumi purred, barely audible enough for Negi to hear as they walked away. Kotaro was so surprised his dog ears popped out.

Finally, Negi was left alone with his two partners who he helped to their feet. "See, all a great big misunderstanding." Negi said with a chuckle. I'm going to kill Kotaro.

"So, Negi-sensei and Yue aren't gay?" Nodoka asked meekly.

Negi filled his lungs to shout out to the world, just as his friends had, the crystal clear truth about what girl it was that had captured his heart and exactly what his sexual orientation happened to be, but to the chagrin of fans and the relief of Fanfiction authors everywhere a small feminine hand clamped over his mouth.

"Negi you're still wearing a dress. If you scream out what we both want to hear then everyone around this dorm is going to get into a misunderstanding… again… thinking that Nodoka and/or I are gay. So please, don't say it." Yue said seriously.

"I really do feel the need to prove we aren't gay though." Negi abashedly murmured.

"Then how about this." Yue said as she forcefully pushed Negi against the wall and latched onto his left side where she commenced a smooch with her teacher that shattered any doubts as to her sexual orientation.

Negi was so stunned he submissively allowed himself to be kissed, as Yue went on the aggressive invading his mouth and emerging victorious. "How's that for straight." Yue said in triumph as she looked over to Nodoka.

Negi looked at the librarian as well as he tried to release himself from the wall only to have his right side pinned by a trembling and red faced Nodoka who proceeded to try her level best to give an even more passionate kiss to her crush. Once again Negi meekly allowed his mouth to get plundered by his student, and afterward couldn't help but find it hard to breathe from so much air depravation in such a short time.

"NEGI!" Asuna cried on cue. "What are you doing?"

The three young people, all still clad in matching school uniforms, looked up to see Asuna standing there looking miserable with her candy still in her hands. From the looks of it she hadn't been able to find Takamichi all day.

"It's not what it looks like!" Negi whined.

"Oh really?" Asuna sneered. "It looks like you dressed up as a girl to avoid a bunch of the other girls around here only to end up having Yue and Nodoka take turns trying to see how far they could shove their tongue down your throat."

As Negi watched, the two girls in question glanced at each other shyly and then gave him a brief playful smirk.

"Okay, it is what it looks like." Nodoka admitted.

"My turn." Yue said pushing Negi back against the wall.

Asuna just shook her head sadly as she abandoned Negi to his captivity. "I'm going to go back and try to find Takahata-sensei, again."

Negi looked at the two girls in his arms as he was once again released from lip lock. "Try the closet."

A/N: Happy Valentine's Day everybody. I haven't posted in a while, so I figured everyone might enjoy a Valentine's Day gift. I hope you all enjoyed it.