Danny looked in the room and saw Alice lying prone on the bed. Her hands covered her eyes. She had a funny look on her face. Like she was in pain but trying so hard not to show it. They didn't say a word to each other as he pulled his stuff from the drawers. He looked up in the mirror and found that she had sat up and was watching him. A calm controlled expression on her face.
"Don't forget your stuff in the dryer too." she said softly. The fact that her heart was breaking was not betrayed in her voice. She was surprised she sounded so calm when inside her inside felt like they were melting in the flow of red hot grief at the loss of love.
Danny nodded stiffly.
"What do I tell Lexi?"
She saw him wince at her name. He exhaled a pain filled breath and the shrugged. He didn't trust his voice. He was scared it would say things and make promises he wasn't capable of keeping.
"Guess you want your name taken off her birth certificate huh?" she asked in a quiet voice.
He whirled around angrily at her words. The instinctive reaction. Rage passed over his features. Then he stood still absorbing her words. "That might be best." he said shakily.
"Does the fact that she loves you not matter?" she asked angrily.
"Alice don't make this harder than it already is!"
"Oh hard. You wanna talk about hard! Think about this for a second. Explaining to a 4 year old why her daddy has just up and left watching her heart break because she's still too young to understand what's going on. This is your fault Danny. You wanted her told what happened to this lifetime commitment you made to our daughter?" she asked angrily.
"That's the point though isn't it Alice. She isn't OUR daughter. She's yours. Yours and his!"
"So your going to break her heart for something that isn't even her fault. You've been her daddy for the last couple of months. Does it matter that genetically your not it means nothing Danny. Nothing at all. For Gods sake you promised that you'd never abandon her never leave her!"
Danny felt his resolve weakening. He stomped over to the wardrobe and started to fling his clothes in the bag.
"What about when her father turns up demanding rights. How am I supposed to stop myself from ripping him apart after what he did to you. Did to us. What he could do to her!" he hissed.
"You think I'm going to tell him? You think I'm going to let him near her? Destroy her soul like he almost destroyed me? You of all people should know that I would never put my child what I went through. She could never be safe with him. Well now that your relinquishing your parental rights right now she's fatherless. So get out of here Danny right now. I'd rather she didn't have to see you. I don't want her to see you walk away, although personally I don't think that could hurt her more than what your doing right now."
"Alice you have to know that isn't my intention at all." he walked over and kneeled in front of her. "You have to know that I love you both so much. I wish that things were different but they aren't. I would do ANYTHING for them to be different but nothing you or I can do will change those results. I can't stay Alice. I HAVE to leave!"
Alice shook her head. "You keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better and you know maybe one day when the guilt fades from breaking a child's heart you might even believe it yourself. I know you Danny. We knew each other inside out. I know exactly what your doing. You don't have to leave you are running from pain. Hiding from it. One day you'll wake up and realise what a humongous mistake you've made. You'll realise that you've made the biggest mistake of your entire life and by them it'll be too late to take it back. You'll realise that you could have been Lexi's father, can't you see she adores you already. She adored you before she even knew she was your daughter. Even used to pretend you were her daddy. We could have had a life together Danny the 3 of us." she exhaled like she'd said too much. She then looked at him a serious expression on her face.
"I warn you Danny if you leave now. Don't come back. EVER. You will not mess with our… my daughters head. Don't phone or write. We cut off all contact from this moment. We'll nev…never see each other again." Alice's voice had broke on the last sentence.
The implications of what Alice was saying washed over them. Never was a long time. Never was like….. Never!
Danny's breathing went shallow as her words sunk in. he closed his eyes as pain filled every cell in his body. He felt like he was about to come apart from the seams. Like he was about to implode. He grabbed her hand. Looked at it. Then leaned up and kissed her softly. Feather light. Her lips melted against his. He kissed her almost reverently. He inhaled her scent. Locked this moment in his memory. The softness of her lips. The scent of her soap and perfume. Her gorgeous face. The way her mouth twitched into a smile when they kissed. He pulled away and saw a tear trail down her cheek. She swallowed the lump in her throat. "Goodbye Danny - We could have had something really special."
He caressed her cheek. "Goodbye Alice. I love you more than anything but I can't stay darling." he pressed a kiss to her palm and murmured against it. "Te Amo."
"Just go Danny." Alice whispered brokenly. Her blue eyes down cast and sad.
He got up and grabbed his bag. "I'm sorry." he said and walked form the room. "I'll never forget you. Both of you." he walked and the room was silent. The only sound was Alice's heart. The only reason it was still beating was because she had no control over that.
After a second Alice realised he'd forgot something. "Danny!" she yelled. No answer. She couldn't let him leave these behind. She panicked. Without thinking she pushed herself and stood up.
Danny walked in and saw her on her feet. His jaw dropped. Alice looked down at her legs with a equally shocked expression.
"I'm standing?" she questioned. Then it hit her. "Danny I'm standing!" she said excitedly. Her smile wide. She then started to wobble and fell back onto the bed. She was sat again but she didn't care. Her legs had held her weight! "Can you believe it Danny?"
He walked over and engulfed her in a hug. "God Alice you stood. This is so great. Incredible!" he kissed her. Then realised this wasn't his to share in. "I'm sorry." he said and released her quickly.
"I called you back to get these." she pulled both rings off. "Can't leave anything behind!" she placed them in his palm. Then they heard the front door open.
"Mummy daddy I'm home!" Lexi yelled.
"Yeah mummy I'm home!" Shauna yelled laughing.
"I thought daddy was picking me up today." Lexi said
"Oh no!" both Danny and Alice exclaimed at the same time. They heard Lexi's little footsteps walking upstairs. Before they could move Lexi burst into their room. She smiled at her parents.
Alice's answering smile looked strained and Danny's looked like a grimace.
"Look baby Danny's."
"Daddy!" Lexi said. "He's my daddy. Not Danny." Lexi was confused.
"Look baby daddy." Alice's tongue stuck on the word daddy. "He has to go to Bristol for a bit."
"Is he going to see nana? Do I get to go too? Please!" She pleaded. The excitement in her voice couldn't be concealed.
"No baby we'll be staying home. You can't miss school." Alice said.
Lexi nodded reluctantly.
Alice's eyes arrowed as she looked at Danny. I've gave you your opening now leave! She said mentally.
"Daddy before you go can I give you something?" Lexi asked.
Danny felt his heart shatter more after each time she called him daddy
"He's in a hurry sweetie." Alice said quickly.
Danny looked at Lexi's green eyes. Which still resembled his so much that his heart broke even more. At this rate he wasn't going to have a heart left!
"Sure sunshine." he knelt down.
She went in her bag and pulled out a picture.
"Today at school we had to talk about our favourite people in the whole entire world." She said gesturing her arms wide to punctuate her point. "Then we had to draw a picture of them. I told everyone about you. About how you're the bestest daddy in the whole entire world. How we play football and have tea parties and build castles in my sand and how you're a prince who protects me from anyone who will hurt me. But I told them that I love you mostly of all coz you're my daddy. I told them that when we hug you hug me really tightly but it doesn't hurt it makes me feel all tingly and happy."
She then handed him her picture. He looked at it. It was 2 people one really tall - freakishly tall actually and there was another person who was really small. They were holding hand at the end of their stick arms.
"I asked my teacher to write me and my daddy across the top." she smiled her baby grin at him and he melted. Her green eyes the exact shade as his just made him crumble. He felt tears gather in his eyes. He pulled Lexi to him and hugged her tight. Tears streamed down his face. He couldn't leave his little girl. He couldn't ever leave her. It was his job to be her prince. To protect her from all the big bad men in the world.
"No matter what baby. I promise I will always be here for you ok. Daddy loves you always."
He then kissed her on the top of her head.
"Daddy are you sad?" she asked.
"No baby I'm fine."
"Why you crying then?"
"Coz I'm so happy that you're my little girl." he said softly. "These are happy tears. You go get changed and I'll see you in a bit."
"But don't you have to go to Bristol?"
"I think it can wait till the weekend and then we'll all go and see nana yeah?" he asked.
"Yay!" Lexi shrieked and bounced from the room to go get changed.
As soon as Lexi left he slumped to the floor and wiped his eyes with the backs of his hands. Alice sat and looked at him. They sparked with malevolence.
"You shouldn't make promises you can't keep Daniel! Not to her she won't understand."
He kept silent. Then said. "Alice honey I'm sorry. Seeing her I realise I couldn't leave her. I love her too much. Looking at her I know she is my daughter. She is nothing to do with any one else except me and you! Please believe me I won't ever leave you."
Alice still didn't believe him.
"That's what I thought before. You promised leave me alone. You've hurt me enough for one day."
"Alice can we just forget today ever happened. Just start from now. I went through an insane couple of hours but I'm fine now."
Alice wanted that more than anything but she didn't know.
"We'll give it a try ok."
"You gonna put these back on?" he asked and held out the rings in his hand.
Alice eyed the rings.
"Lexi will wonder what's going on if you don't."
"Ok." Alice said grudgingly. He slipped the rings back on.
"Now how about we go tell Lexi and Shauna the good news huh?" he said and pulled her up so she was standing. He let go of her hands and she stood again. Her previous mood forgotten she smiled widely. She started to wobble and he out his arm around her waist and caught her.
"Thank God for our daughter huh? She stopped me doing the stupidest thing ever!" he whispered.
A/N the reason y i chose to make Lexi not his daughter was bcoz a it is pretty essential 2 part 3 the ties that bind and i think it sorta makes their relationship even stronger and they find out that survivin this means they cn survive anything which gets thrown at them. im sorry bt i knew as soon as i started the story she wasn't his :/