Chapter Thirty-Seven: Facing Fears
Why did the ocean have to be so big? The endless expanse of blue was no longer wondrous in Jack's mind, instead becoming as frustrating, unwanted, and uninviting as a maze. The Winter Spirit flew as fast as he could, constantly spinning and scouring the area around him in search of Ace, but the only other person that seemed to exist near him was Tooth. The Guardians carefully stayed on course, never drifting too far to the left or right, hoping that they were still heading close to the right direction. Towards Ace. They had seen the storm the Summer Spirit created, but it vanished long before they could reach him, leaving them to flit about near-aimlessly and pray that they could still locate the fire-user.
Jack could not understand how things had ended up like this. Ace had seemed fine. He had not been taking part in the conversation between Jack, the Guardians, and Luffy and Sabo once the two showed up, but being a listener more than a 'talker' had become the Summer Spirit's default role as of late. From the Winter Spirit's point of view, Ace had been calmly following along with their conversation about Guardians and centers before exploding randomly. Though to be honest, Jack doubted that was the case.
He had been so excited to potentially figure out what those white flames were and what they could mean that he had not thought to ask Ace about his own opinions, instead grilling Luffy and the Guardians for more information. The Winter Spirit had not truly considered that the fire-user could become a Guardian someday, and was overcome by joy and pride at the thought of his little brother joining the elite group of Spirits. He should have known better. He knew Ace better than that.
If Jack's theory about the white flames was correct, Ace's center was freedom. That made sense. The fire-user adored the idea of limitlessness and being able to make his own decisions in life. He chose to be a pirate. He wished to be free of his father's legacy. He decided who would be his family and brothers. Ace was not exactly one to seek freedom for everyone, but he sought it for himself and those closest to him.
And others wanted to take those choices— that freedom— away from him.
Jack could see it all so clearly now, and wished he had gained such clarity sooner. Ace was going to be forced to go to Earth. No choice. He had to leave his family. No choice. He was going to work for Mother Nature. No choice. He would be appointed as a Guardian, because of course all of Manny's chosen joined his team of Spirits. No choice. They might as well be clapping manacles around his wrists before they dragged him through the portal. Before Pitch got Ace with the black sand, those restraints might not have bothered the Summer Spirit so much, but now— when he was struggling and dependent on others and was already dealing with much more than anyone could hope to handle— the realization broke him.
So Ace fled— and Jack had to admire his brother's control, for even now he made sure to get away so his anger could not harm his loved ones— and finally let all the emotions and thoughts he had been shoving away out. The Winter Spirit would not be so worried about it if not for what he feared might come after. That was why he and Tooth were soaring over the open sea, frantically searching for their missing Summer Spirit.
"Do you see him?" Jack called to the Guardian of Memories.
The Fairy shook her head. She swooped closer to Jack, adjusting her wings so she was not thrown off course by the Wind swirling around the Winter Spirit.
"Are we still going the right way?" she asked.
Jack glanced at the moon, taking in its position. He really wished it was daylight, though he was grateful the moon and stars were providing some light for them to see by.
"I think so." He said, sounding more confident then he felt.
Tooth bit her lip, her pink eyes almost gleaming in the darkness. "Maybe we should—"
"We're not going back." Jack interrupted firmly. "We'll find him…"
He trailed off, eyes widening as light shone from the darkness. For a moment, he thought they had run into ship or something, only to realize the light came from the sky, shining down on something. It only took an instant for Jack to recognize the gentle beams.
Manny?
Without so much as a glance at each other, Jack and Tooth shot in the direction of the shifting moonlight. The ice-user wondered how and why the Man in the Moon was communicating with them now after so long of being silent on this world, but pushed those questions away, urging the Wind to carry him faster. It obliged and the Winter Spirit overtook the Guardian of Memories, soaring towards the moonlight like a bullet.
The first thing he noticed was the rocky outcrop that stuck out above the waves. The second thing he noticed was the person lying on said rocks. The third thing he noticed was the red splattered on the stone.
Jack forgot how to breathe. His lungs stopped working. His mind went blank. His body grew numb. For a moment, the Wind kept him aloft, drifting above the ocean, above the sight that made his heart turn to ice in his chest. Then he plunged.
"ACE!"
The Winter Spirit crashed beside his unmoving brother, bashing his knee on the rock as he landed. Jack ignored the stinging pain, scrambling over to Ace, horrified eyes taking in the bloody gashes on the fire-user's skin. His mind tried to register what those cuts meant and tell him what had likely happened, but his brain rejected the information again and again, refusing to even consider such a thing.
What mattered was Ace was hurt. Ace was unconscious. Ace was bleeding bleeding bleeding—
Without hesitation, Jack tore off his blue hoodie, leaving him with only the whitish shirt he wore underneath, and ripped the sweatshirt into strips. He used the fabric to wrap Ace's wounds, body going on autopilot while his mind remained trapped in a panicked— but distant— loop. He heard Tooth arrive when she gasped.
"Dear Manny…" the Fairy whispered, hands over her mouth.
Jack tied another strip around one of the worst wounds on Ace's arm, hands surprisingly steady. Then he paused, eyes darting from the blood, to Ace, to his brother's wrists, to his own hands. His bloody fingers twitched.
Tooth put a hand on his arm. "Jack—"
"Bay." Jack blurted, voice strange and echoing in his head, like he was hearing it from down a long corridor. "We have to get him to Bay?"
It came out as a question. Something tried to squeeze Jack's chest and choke him but he ignored it, struggling to pick up Ace. The fire-user was a dea— a heavy weight in his arms, limp and unresponsive, and Jack felt something cold settle around his heart. Tooth moved as if to help him but the Winter Spirit backed away from her, clutching his brother to his chest.
"I have him." He said roughly, and took to the sky.
He barely made it a couple yards before he froze in midair. Which way did we come from?
Jack turned his head rapidly, making his neck hurt in the process, but could not recall where the Moby Dick was. The squeezing feeling returned, twice as strong, and he clenched his fists, accidentally, pinching Ace's skin. The fire-user did not so much as twitch. Tooth ascended next to the Winter Spirit, face pale and something clutched in her hand.
"This fell out of your pocket."
Jack stared at the piece of paper she held blankly. It was twitching, pointing to the East. Memory struck and he inhaled sharply. That's Sabo's Vivre Card.
"Follow it." He said sharply, and flew in the direction it pointed, towards Sabo and the Moby Dick and help.
Tooth wasted no time in flying after him, confused but unwilling to question him. Jack's heartbeat was getting faster, as was his breathing, but he did not let it affect him. Not yet. Not yet. Jack slammed onto the Moby Dick's deck more than landed on it, startling a couple pirates. Not waiting for them to even register who he was holding, the Winter Spirit turned to the closest one.
"Get Bay!"
The pirate fled, and the rest burst into motion, gasping, shouting, and crowding the Spirits as they finally comprehended what they were seeing.
"Ace!"
"What happened?"
"Oh my Oda…"
"Did he get attacked?"
"Is that blood?"
"Someone find Marco!"
"Not again…"
"Where's Bay?"
Tooth took the initiative to stand between Jack, Ace, and the pirates, hands raised as she tried to keep the mob from smothering the two. Luckily, Bay arrived, and the men and women willingly scattered before her. The doctor barely took a second to take in the situation before she was at Ace's side, snapping at the nurses that came with her.
"Get him on the stretcher. Sage, prep a blood transfusion and clear the operation room." She ordered.
The nurse in question rushed to do as she commanded, and the doctor reached for Ace. It took all of Jack's willpower to go against his instincts to shield his brother and stop her from taking him, instead prying his fingers away from Ace's arms one by one. The Winter Spirit blinked and Ace and the doctors were gone, rushing for the infirmary. Jack sat on the deck for a long time, unable to move, staring at his hands again. Then arms wrapped around him and the wall he created broke down, the thoughts and feelings he had been ignoring rushing to the surface.
Ace slit his wrists. He hurt himself. Why? Why? Why?
The Guardian wanted to believe that the fire-user had been attacked again, but knew he was reaching for an alternative to the horrific truth he could not deny. He didn't understand though. He could not understand. Ace would not do this. And yet he had. Jack's thoughts must still be muddled because was too shocked to cry, but the person holding him— Luffy?— possibly was. The Winter Spirit could feel the Straw Hat Pirate shaking, the movement accompanied by undignified sniffles. He distantly questioned why his youngest brother was not saying anything, only for the sobbing to become rapid and high-pitched, suggesting hyperventilation. Jack twisted in Luffy's arms and embraced his brother.
"Ace got hurt." Luffy rambled. "I saw them bring him in. He got hurt and they won't let me near him or tell me what's going on."
Jack went to pat his black hair consolingly, only to catch sight of the blood on his hands again. He stood up, dragging Luffy with him, and detachedly pushed his little brother at the closest person he saw— who happened to be Sanji. The cook caught his babbling Captain and did not object when he was subjected to a crushing embrace. The Winter Spirit idly noted that the blond-haired Straw Hat was pale. He also wondered just how long he had zoned out for but pushed that thought away.
"I have to clean up." The Guardian mumbled, wandering past the vague figures that might be people and heading below deck.
Jack entered the bathroom and robotically washed his hands, watching the crimson trickle down the drain. It came off easily, even with little soap, but the Winter Spirit could still feel the stickiness on his skin. He exhaled shakily and swallowed, getting more soap and scrubbing furiously at his palms. He could not see any more red but it was still there. He still felt the nauseating sensation of it. He'd had Ace's blood on his hands and it needed to be gone it needed to go away why wouldn't it go away—?
A large hand reached over and turned off the water. Jack looked into the mirror, meeting concerned blue eyes.
Tooth must have sent him. Huh.
He forced a smile. "Rude, North. I was using that."
The Cossack did not say anything.
Jack looked back at his hands, noticing they were raw from scrubbing, and let his gaze drift to his white shirt. "Bet you never knew I had this, huh? I'm surprised it hasn't rotted yet. It's like, a hundred years old. That hoodie was pretty old too. It was at least thirty. What about your stuff? You've had that coat forever. Do we have some power that keeps our clothes from rotting? That'd be pretty handy. If we figure out how to apply it to stuff we could open a business and make a lot of money. We'd have to work on stains though. Our clothes can get stained by things like blood and—"
Jack spoke faster and faster, voice heightening in pitch as he rambled, only to cut himself off when North pulled him into a hug. The Winter Spirit leaned his head against the Cossack's chest, staring at the mirror like it was the most fascinating thing in the world. He took in North's solemn reflection, and his own confused, hoodie-less image… and watched tears well up in his eyes.
"Why?" he asked, voice cracking. "Why did Ace do that?"
North's embrace tightened. "I do not know. You will have to ask him once he wakes up."
"If he wakes up. He was hurt badly and Pitch has him now." Jack said. He instantly regretted the words. The tears burned his eyes but did not fall, even when he closed them. "This is my fault. I should have noticed something was wrong."
North released him, putting his hands on the Winter Spirit's shoulders. "Lamenting about 'what ifs' is pointless. You should focus on the now, and what can be done in the future."
Shock and grief were engulfed by a simmering rage, and Jack shoved the Cossack away. "How can I not focus on 'what ifs'? I was so busy being caught up in my own little world that I didn't notice when my brother was freaking out right next to me!"
He could feel ice forming over his skin and hair like armor, cold but oddly welcome. Jack found himself wishing for the cool detachment and apathy of his element, preferring emotionlessness to the pain that still lingered in his chest, and the ice covering him seemed to thicken. Something close to alarm flashed through North's expression, vanishing quickly.
"Such thoughts will only hurt you, Jack." The Cossack warned softly.
"Stop that! This isn't about me!" Jack snapped, voice rising. "Just— Just stop trying to console me! Ace is the one who's hurt. He's the one who needs help, and advice, and— and who tried to—"
An uncomfortable cough interrupted him. Thatch stood awkwardly in the doorway, eyes darting between the two Guardians. His eyes settled on Jack though his irises flicked towards North on occasion. It was almost like the chef was trying not to stare at the Cossack.
"Bay's finally letting people within twenty feet of the med bay door." The Fourth Division Commander said. "How about we go wait?"
The cheer in his voice was blatantly forced, but Jack did not have the heart to call him out on it. He and North silently follow the chef to the area outside the infirmary. Chairs had been set up along the hall, turning it into an impromptu waiting room. Luffy and Sabo were already there, along with the other Guardians, a couple more Commanders, Garp, and an exhausted-looking Marco. Jack sat heavily in the empty seat between his brothers.
Two pieces of paper were shoved into his hands and the Winter Spirit stared at them uncomprehendingly, looking up and meeting the Phoenix's tired green-tinted eyes. It must be the lighting, but they looked more yellow than usual. Marco held his gaze, arm twitching slightly like he wanted to say something or place a comforting hand on Jack's shoulder, only to change his mind.
"Tooth told me about you almost getting lost." Marco said shortly. "Sabo was about to go after you both. Those are mine and Thatch's so you can get back here in case you need to leave again." His eyes grew shadowed. "I'm not going anywhere."
The explanation was disjointed and stilted but Jack appreciated the sentiment. He was not currently in the mood for niceties as well so he understood and accepted the Phoenix's distant delivery of his reasons. He nodded in thanks and gripped the new Vivre Cards tightly. Seeing his dilemma, North handed him a small pouch that he could clip to his waistband. Again, Jack nodded his thanks and put the papers in the bag, trying not to think about his hoodie.
He noticed Marco was still staring at him intently, but the Phoenix broke eye contact when he saw Jack looking. The Winter Spirit mentally shrugged and settled back for a long wait. Naturally, Luffy could not remain quiet for long.
"What happened?" the Straw Hat Captain asked Jack directly. "Ace left and got hurt, but Tooth won't tell me how or who did it."
The Winter Spirit glanced at the Guardian of Memories, who avoided his eyes. Her skin was ashen and her hands were entwined tightly in her lap. Jack's eyes moved to Sabo and he immediately saw the shock, hollowness, and anger in the Revolutionary's expression. He wondered if Sabo had seen Ace's wounds before he was whisked away or if he had made an educated guess.
"So do you know who did this?" Luffy pressed, growing impatient. "Who attacked Ace?"
Jack could not find the words or strength to tell him.
Sabo had no such qualms. "No one attacked him, Luffy." The Revolutionary said tonelessly. "Ace tried to kill himself."
The rubber pirate's expression went unnervingly blank, mouth falling open in a way that reminded Jack horribly of Marineford. A few seats down, Garp's fists clenched and began to shake.
"We don't know that." The Winter Spirit said instantly.
Sabo looked him with turbulent blue eyes. "I saw Ace's injuries. He slashed his wrists again."
Again? Jack thought, confused. "He's never—"
The Revolutionary raised a hand to stop him. "Don't. Don't make excuses for him." "He— He's so stupid!" Sabo's voice lowered and began to shake but remained eerily calm. He sounded tired rather than angry, and that apathy just made his words worse. "Ace has always seen his life as worthless. His entire purpose for living was to see if he should have been born. After everything he went through— which ground the last of his pitiful self-worth into dust— are you really surprised he decided to leave us all and off himse—?"
Jack spun in his seat and punched the Revolutionary in the face. Koala caught Sabo as he fell backwards into her arms, and Bunny lunged for the Winter Spirit, holding him back so he did not attack the blond-haired Logia again. Jack's fists shook with rage, the anger and iciness returning full force. The Pooka's grip on him tightened and he spoke before the enraged Guardian of Fun could.
"Let's all just calm down here." Bunny said levelly. "There's no reason to fight. None of us really know what happened to Ace. Things might not be as they seem, and we should keep from speculating until he wakes up to give us some answers." He pinned the two brothers with a fierce glare. "He'd be upset if he heard about you two coming to blows over him."
Sabo straightened in his seat, cradling his cheek where Jack decked him. His blue eyes were still rather hollow but the emptiness was not enough to hide the hurt and sadness lingering underneath.
"I think he's too busy being unconscious to be upset about that." He said, not sounding the slightest bit angry or bitter.
Jack felt the urge to slug Sabo again, even as his brotherly side acknowledged that the Revolutionary was just lashing out due to distress. He settled for turning away from Sabo and leaning back in his chair, focused completely on the door. As an uneasy silence fell over them all, his thoughts finally cleared and he shuddered.
Bunny was right. They did not know the whole story, and they might be jumping to conclusions. They had to wait for Ace to wake up and explain himself. But that did not mean Jack was completely ignorant.
Ace had gotten upset and run away. He had been found alone on a rocky island in the middle of nowhere and was injured. He was now unconscious, which meant he was currently having nightmares even as the doctors tried to save him. Jack's anger dwindled and he put his head in his hands, his fear about what Ace had possibly done and what it could mean being replaced by fear for his brother's mental safety.
What is Ace experiencing right now? Whatever it is, it can't be good. Pitch was pissed the last time we fought, and I have no doubt he's taking it out on Ace right now. The doctors are trying to save Ace from blood loss, but will it even matter? At best, the nightmares will make his mentality worse than before, at worst it could kill him. He's not only fighting his wounds, but the sand too. What if he isn't strong enough? What if he doesn't survive… Or what if he doesn't want to?
Jack aborted that line of thought, moving his hands upward to grip his hair. No. That won't happen. If Ace still wanted to die he would be dead already. I have to trust that he regretted what he did. I have to have faith that he still wants to live. If he had really given up, he would let the sand kill him, regardless of the doctor's efforts.
The thought gave Jack hope and he raised his head, continuing to stare at the closed door between himself and his struggling brother.
Despite what he might or might not have done, Ace is still fighting. He is still trying. His injuries may be a… complication but it's all up to Ace now. You can do this. You can survive, kiddo.
I believe in you.
ROTGOPROTGOP
Ace was four years old. At least, he thought he was four. The… child frowned at his small, pudgy hands in confusion, wiggling his tiny fingers, but was quickly distracted from his bewilderment by his surroundings. He stood in the forest on Dawn Island. The sun's light filtered through the treetops and the leaves rustled gently in the wind, making Ace look upon them with awe.
One leaf drifted down from its branch, emerald and gold in the sunlight, and the boy giggled, walking towards it and trying to catch it in his palms. He succeeded and beamed at his prize, holding it up to the light. The sunbeams made the fragile veins and lines in the leaf more prominent, showing off the fascinating, unique designs in its membrane. Ace wasted no time in showing it to his companion, a wide smile on his face.
"Jack! Look what I—"
The Winter Spirit was not there. Ace blinked and turned in a circle, smile fading when he failed to spot the Guardian. The child held his leaf to his chest and glanced around uncertainly before deciding Jack must be hiding. That was rude of him. People were supposed to say when they were playing hide and seek. He began to walk towards their treehouse, hopping over tree roots and leaves, and pouted to himself.
Jack's being a meanie again, he huffed. Why does he always have to play tricks?
"It's not a trick."
Ace jumped and backed up a step, eying his surroundings apprehensively. He thought he heard a voice but no one was there. The child quickly decided to ignore it and its words anyway because it was not real and he needed to find Jack. He kept walking through the forest, moving just a little faster than before. It was getting dark. The trees were turning from green and brown to black and grey, welcoming foliage becoming thin fingers and harsh shadows waiting to grab him.
One branch seemed to reach out, carving a gash in Ace's cheek as he passed, and he gasped, clapping a hand to the cut. His steps quickened and he started to run, yelping as the forest grabbed for him, pulling at his clothes and hair and cutting into his skin. The child flinched and ran faster, feeling uneasy even as he told himself that no, the trees were not out to get him.
"Jack?" he called, voice shaky and small. "Jack, where are you?"
No response came from the Winter Spirit. A gale started up, harsh and cold, and Ace winced as it struck his exposed skin. He shivered and rubbed at his upper arms in an attempt to warm himself, slowing down as the temperature plummeted.
"J-Jack!" he shouted. "Come out! This isn't funny anymore!"
His brother refused to show himself. Panic finally gripped Ace's limbs and he raced through the whipping branches and shadowy woods, the forest growing darker and more unfamiliar with every step. He shouted for Jack, again and again, but his voice was lost amongst the howling winds. But it would be fine. He would be fine. He just needed Jack—
With a horrible crack, a tree fell. Ace tried to get out of the way but was not quick enough. The trunk slammed into him, sending him to the ground, and his right leg was pinned beneath the wood, splinters and bark digging into his flesh. The child screamed as he felt the bones in his lower leg snap, pain shooting up the limb. Ace looked at it and wished he had not, shaking as he spotted the bloody mess that was his leg.
He tried to pull the limb out and wailed again as the splinters were driven deeper into his flesh. He could not move his leg an inch. Pushing at the tree trunk was useless as well, the wood too heavy for him to shift and free himself. Ace could feel tears brimming in his eyes.
"Jack, I'm stuck!" he called, a sob in his voice.
There was no sound except for the cold gale. There was no playful wind to announce the Winter Spirit's presence. The forest remained empty except for the child, helpless and alone.
"Pathetic." The wind seemed to hiss. "You can't even escape by yourself."
Ace pushed desperately at the fallen trunk again, not acknowledging the taunts. It still would not budge. As the forest grew darker and night fell around him, Ace slowly gave up, laying down and crying quietly from both frustration and pain. Why was he so weak? He was stronger than this. He had lifted things much heavier than the tree before with little effort.
"It's because you're helpless on your own." The wind and trees whispered. "You can do anything unassisted. Forced to rely on others for every little thing… and yet you call Luffy the baby."
Ace was starting to feel cold, and it was not the nice cold of Jack, his powers, and his hugs. He shivered and breathed shakily, consciousness flickering, but a bolt of pain shooting through his leg startled him back into wakefulness. He shoved at the trunk one more time, then let his arms fall to his sides. He couldn't do it. He couldn't free himself. He would have to wait for Jack to rescue him, for the Winter Spirit to help him like he always had to.
I'm so weak… Ace thought, his tears only adding to his assessment. I can't do anything alone.
Vague memories flashed through his mind, shadowy and disjointed, and along with his confusion about them came a bitter acceptance. He was not strong enough to defeat Teach or Akainu. He was not courageous enough to stand against Pitch's tortures. He was forced to rely on others from day to day, not trustworthy or capable enough to be by himself for even a second. He was just a burden, a weakling, and a load others had to bear. Even when he tried his best, it was not good enough.
Ace's puzzlement over his fractured memories was swept aside by an empty feeling in his gut. He tried to curl up, only for the movement to shift his leg, causing him to scream in agony. Once the pain lessened and he calmed down, the child realized that if Jack had not come running because of his shrieks, then the Winter Spirit was not coming at all.
That's okay. He shouldn't have to help me, Ace thought. His grey eyes widened, then narrowed. He shouldn't have to help me. Not with this.
Other memories were coming back, showing him fighting beside an orange-haired woman, assisting a pompadour-sporting man, and protecting a familiar straw hat-wearing teen.
No. I'm not weak. Not all the time. When it matters, I can be competent. I can help people. I can still do things by myself. I'm not weak, or useless, or helpless.
More recent memories rushed back into his mind. Even after being tortured, I still fought Pitch. I won't say I went toe to toe with him, but I did manage to survive every time. I've battled Garp and Teach, defended my brothers, practically raised Luffy, helped Thatch recover from the news of Teach's death, and made Haruta realize his guilt was uncalled-for. Some things aren't that important, but I still did them.
I am Hiken D. Ace, Summer Spirit and former Commander of Whitebeard. I will not be defeated by a bloody tree.
The trunk vanished in white flames.
ROTGOPROTGOP
"…Is it because of us?"
Jack and a few others turned to look at Tooth, who did not appear to notice their gazes or that she had spoken aloud. The Fairy's feathers were duller than normal, droopy and pressed close to her body like she was trying to keep herself warm. Even her eyes seemed to have lost some of their color, staring vaguely at the wall in front of her.
The Guardian of Memories modified her question. "Did Ace do this because of us?"
Jack opened his mouth to say 'Of course not' but could not voice the words.
"It wasn't just you." Thatch said quietly, not looking at the Guardians. "Ace has been struggling for… quite a while, and problems just kept piling up. He hasn't slept for weeks, Pitch attacked, people died, Marco got hurt—" The Phoenix looked away. "— Ace's room was vandalized, there was the stress of you guys showing up… that new bounty of his that requests he be captured alive—" North and Bunny's eyes widened before narrowing suspiciously. "—and more." The chef gave a watery chuckle that held no amusement. "We really should have seen this coming. We should have known Ace wasn't nearly as okay as he pretended to be."
"What more could we have done, though?" Izo asked rhetorically. "We're not mind-readers and pestering him would only make him even more tight-lipped. Ace wouldn't tell us what was bothering him in order to 'protect' us." The okama sighed deeply, rubbing at his eyes. "He always was the type to hide things and try to deal with them on his own."
"He should have known better." Sabo said.
Jack could not identify if his tone was bitter or just tired, so he did not comment.
"He didn't— doesn't." Thatch replied. His shoulders slumped. "I just—"
Almost everyone jumped when Bay burst from the infirmary with enough force to make the door slam into the wall with a crash. Her eyes scanned the tense, pale faces in the halls, resting on the Winter Spirit.
"Jack, get in here."
The Winter Spirit leapt on his seat and rushed to follow the command. Luffy and Sabo rose as well but Bay froze them with a glare.
"You two, stay here."
Even Luffy did not dare to argue, paralyzed by the warning in her tone. As soon as Jack entered the infirmary, she slammed the door shut in their faces.
ROTGOPROTGOP
Ace woke in water.
He yelped and stumbled to his feet, causing the liquid that had nearly covered his face to splash around his ankles. His pants clung to his legs, dripping water down his calves, and as he watched the water quickly reached his knees. The fire-user barely took time to recognize that he was in the Moby Dick's med bay before he took off running, ripping the door open on his way out.
The ship was sinking. Water flooded the empty halls, filling the vessel room by room as it was slowly submerged. Ace did not question how the Moby Dick had been damaged or attempt to seek out anyone else.
I need to get out.
The floor tilted and he slammed into the wall, pressing his opposite hand against the wood in an attempt to remain upright. He continued racing through the lower decks, breathing heavily, and yelped as water broke through the wood in front of him, spraying him in the face. He inhaled some and coughed, wincing as it burned his lungs, but pushed onward, making it onto the deck. He had just enough time to see that the blue sky before the wood groaned beneath his feet.
Ace tried to take to the air but was not quick enough. The boat snapped in half below him and he fell plunging into the water. The impact drove the breath from his lungs and he opened his mouth on instinct, breathing in liquid instead of air.
The fire-user's body jerked and writhed in pain and he clamped his mouth shut, fighting against the black spots swaying in front of his eyes. The water was icy cold and hungrily soaked his shorts, drenching them until they seemed to be a thousand times heavier than before. It sapped the strength from his limbs, making them feel like lead, and Ace slowly began to sink. He was an idiot. Of course he could not swim. Devil Fruit users were deadweights in the water.
The pressure was starting to get to Ace, squeezing his head and chest, and he fought to keep the last bits of air inside his aching lungs. He wanted to think that someone would rescue him, but he was alone. The thought scared him a little, but at the moment loneliness was overcome by a fear of death. No, not death exactly. Dying like this. The fire-user was drowning in icy water, just like Jack did. At least the Winter Spirit had drowned saving someone. Ace was just drowning.
All those stories I heard about his death… and yet this is how I go out… Ace thought faintly. Not in battle… or saving my family. Just… like this…
He almost felt indignant and cheated. Ace was not the most prideful guy, but he admitted that he wanted to go out in a blaze of glory, not slip away, alone and unnoticed, because he fell into the sea. Jack had always been so terrified of the fire-user drowning that he had taught Ace to swim as soon as he had enough motion control.
The pirate could easily recall the agitated, nervous look the Winter Spirit always got whenever Ace was in the water, watching him like a hawk and ready to dive to his rescue the moment he thought something was wrong. Ace had always been an adequate swimmer though, and had easily learned how to maneuver through the water by the time he was four. That training had become useless once he got a Devil Fruit.
…But I don't have the Mera Mera No Mi anymore. I'm a Spirit now.
Ace forced his eyes open. He remembered now. He was no longer an anchor, doomed to be a frozen hammer in the sea. He knew how to swim, and could if he wanted to. There was no reason to fear the water. It could no longer trap him.
Fire raced through Ace's limbs and he pushed at the water, heading towards the distant light he could see far above him. His arms and legs wanted to protest, but their cramps and heaviness were pushed aside and ignored in favor of pure determination. The surface was far away, but it was not out of reach. The water was an obstacle, not a prison.
He could escape it.
Ace's lungs and limbs burned but he kept treading water, slowly making his way out of the depths of the sea. He kept his eyes on his goal, which drew closer with every stroke, close enough that he swore he could reach out and touch the light that looked like a shimmering sun.
He broke the surface of the water, breathing in wonderful, clean air and white fire burned around him, consuming the ocean.
ROTGOPROTGOP
If Jack was not walking so quickly, he was certain Bay would be dragging him to Ace's side by his shirt. Instead he kept pace with the doctor, who threw gloves, a smock, and a hair net at him as they went. The Winter Spirit put on the gear without question or complaint, even as his stomach twisted. He was not certain how well he would be able to handle it if he was being taken into his brother's operation. The Guardian was not one to flee when Ace needed him, however, so he did not hesitate for a second when Bay held the door to the room open for him, ushering him inside.
The place was so sterile Jack had to resist the desire to cringe in distaste. He knew hospitals had to be like this, he did, but that did not mean he had to like it. After his initial disgust, the Winters Spirit's eyes were drawn to the single bed in the room, which had two nurses beside it. His breath caught in his throat.
If not for the heart monitor at his side and the slight movement of his chest, Jack was certain Ace would look dead. His skin was paler than the white sheet he lay on, made worse by the contrast against his sweaty black hair. Although he had not lost any more weight— that Jack was aware of— the Summer Spirit looked thinner and smaller than he actually was, his cheekbones and ribs sticking out more than before.
His arms were already stitched and heavily bandages, the white strips almost blending into his sickly skin. A bag of red liquid— the Winter Spirit carefully did not think about what it was even though he definitely knew— was set in a stand near the fire-user and another bag— filled with a much friendlier clear liquid—was currently attached to an IV stuck in Ace's arm.
Jack had to release a relieved sigh as he took it all in, the setup making him understand that Ace was out of danger at this time— or at least in less danger than he was before. The Winter Spirit approached slowly, eyes never leaving his unconscious brother's face, and listened to the steady beating of the heart monitor. Bay gave him a moment before speaking.
"The only reason I brought you in here is because I have no idea what the hell is happening."
Jack shot her an alarmed glance but she continued before he could ask.
"Look at this." Bay said, striding forward and gently picking up Ace's right arm.
It took Jack a minute, but he slowly identified the source of her confusion. Ace's arm was thickly bandaged, with only the skin of his upper arm currently visible. The clear skin of his upper arm.
"The sand there is gone?" Jack gasped.
Bay frowned and carefully set Ace's arm down. "So I was right that there used to be sand there. I wasn't certain so I wanted to ask you. Which reminds me… Do you have an idea of how the hell this happened?"
Jack's thoughts jumped to a possible solution and an unbidden grin crossed his face. "He actually can do it." He hurried to explain when Bay shot him a look that promised a brutal demise if he didn't. "We think the white flames Ace used in battle have the ability to free things. That would include freeing himself of the black sand."
As if it had decided to support the Guardian of Fun's statement, a flicker of white appeared at Ace's left leg. Before their stunned— and in Jack's case, joyful— eyes, the flames seemed to devour part of the sand on the Summer Spirit's calf, leaving smooth, unblemished skin behind.
Jack's grin grew so big his cheeks began to hurt. "He's doing it." He repeated. "He's fighting his fears and winning."
ROTGOPROTGOP
Ace woke on an operation table.
The fire-user barely had his eyes open for a second before he closed them, unwilling to look at what lay before him any longer. Positioned above him was a large mirror, an object that was noticeably out of place in the medical setting. Then again, the Summer Spirit was most definitely not in a legal and ethical facility. How did he know?
If Ace's single second of sight was accurate, he was currently split open like a gutted fish, his insides clearly on display.
The fire-user's fragile state of denial failed him and agony ripped through his body. The cloth in his mouth stopped him from voicing a scream, but for all he knew he might not be able to make a sound regardless. He didn't have a voice. Or did he?
Ace tried to ignore the pain by getting a feel for his situation, which was rather counterproductive in hindsight. The only sensation the Summer Spirit could comprehend was the exposed condition of his organs. He managed to refrain from retching and forced his eyes open again, trying to take in his surroundings without looking directly at himself in the mirror.
A few quick glances revealed that he was cuffed to the table by his wrists and ankles by thick metal manacles, and his head was stuck in its current position due to straps over his forehead. He caught sight of something pulsing at the edge of his vision and— were those his ribs?—closed his eyes again, struggling not to gag.
The sound of an opening door made him tense, but he could do little else to move as the newcomer approached. The tapping footsteps halted beside him and there was a soft click. Ace cringed, expecting something to be driven into his skin, but nothing touched him.
"Day four hundred eighty-three. Subject has shown no adverse effects to dissection except for enhanced stimulation of the A delta and C nerve fibers." The man spoke dispassionately, feeling no empathy for the fire-user.
Ace realized he must be recording his words on something, and relaxed the slightest bit. A second later, pain lanced through the Spirit's body but he did not have the ability to flinch. His eyes snapped open on instinct and he saw a man in a lab coat prodding a strange empty area in his abdomen with a—
Ace shut his eyes again.
"The retrieved kidney and liver have not regenerated as expected, but the subject's body has not shown signs of shutting down."
A small hint of emotion entered the scientist's voice, but it did not give Ace hope. The man sounded intrigued, almost excited, like he had been given a precious gift. The Summer Spirit's body tried to lurch when the scientist began cutting something but could do little more than twitch pathetically. Tears trickled down his temples and the man stopped what he was doing. A gloved hand touched Ace's face and he desperately wished he could shrink away.
"I truly am sorry about hurting you like this." The scientist said, not sounding sorry at all. "But I'm afraid it must be done. You have something we want, something so many people would kill for. Immortality." He spoke the last word almost lustfully, making a shiver go up Ace's spine. "I can see that you do not want your gift. You wanted to die even before I acquired you." He laughed, the sound so human it was eerie. "It's so ironic. Many wish to live for eternity, and yet the one who doesn't is doomed to roam this world forever."
The man continued to stroke his cheek, making the Summer Spirit's skin crawl with every touch. Ace refused to even look at him.
The scientist sighed and pulled away. "But that's all right. I'm sure I've almost found your secret. I won't be able to kill you, but I just might be able to use you to create something beautiful. Isn't that wonderful?"
Ace could not respond, even if he wanted to.
There was another click. "Day four hundred eighty-three, continued. Subject is conscious. Proceeding with scheduled heart removal."
Ace wanted to panic. He wanted to flail and fight and scream. But the ability to move seemed to have abandoned him, leaving him trapped in his body as there was the soft clink of shifting metal. He tried to delude himself into thinking he would die but the facts told him that would not be the case. Forget his previous fear of drowning. He would prefer that death— any death— to being forced to live forever.
When he was human, he lived with the full expectancy that every day would be his last. He was lucky to be born— and maybe should not have been born at all— and was perfectly happy— and a little surprised— when he lasted another day. Then Marineford happened, and he died, but then he was brought back as a Spirit. An Immortal.
Ace did not have a human lifespan anymore. He would not age anymore. He would never die.
A single day had become an eternity, and that terrified Ace. He accepted that he would die someday. He was supposed to die someday. But that certainty had been torn away from him, and now he was paying the price for it.
Ace tried to focus on anything else as the scientist literally cut his heart out, but his other sources of pain could not compare to the sheer agony the operation wrought. He did not want to live like this. He did not want to live forever. Not when there was absolutely no way for his suffering to end. Except…
This isn't possible. Spirits can die. They're not invincible.
Vague tales about vanishing and slain Immortals trickled back to Ace. Spirits could be injured. They could fade away, through unlucky disbelief or choice. Even powerful Spirits like Sandy and Mother Nature could fall if they were damaged enough. That meant Ace was not completely immortal. He could die.
The pain was growing distant, almost muffled now. Ace could no longer feel his heart being ripped from his chest, or any of his other wounds for that matter. The realization was strangely comforting. He did not want to die, exactly, but he was not cursed to live through unspeakable torture that no body could endure, not even his own.
How odd. This fear did not require force or determination to overcome, merely understanding. He hoped the next nightmare would also be so merciful.
Ace let himself fall into gentle white flames, and peacefully slipped away.
ROTGOPROTGOP
The sound of a footstep broke through the darkness, and in an instant Jack snapped from sleeping to wakefulness. He leaped up and forwards, staff held high and crackling with power, only to let it dissipate when he saw who had woken him. Luffy had the forethought to keep his distance, hands up, falling back until he saw the Winter Spirit recognized he was not a threat.
Jack took a moment to scan the room, briefly checking on Ace. The fire-user was still unconscious, still breathing, but appeared to have less black marks then he did before. The Winter Spirit let his defensive stance fall, wiping a hand across his forehead and rolling his shoulders in an attempt to get the crick out of his neck.
"Sorry." He grunted at his youngest brother.
Luffy shrugged, not the least bit concerned about the fact that he had nearly been turned into a human ice sculpture. As usual. "No worries. I just came to check on Ace. Bay finally said I could come in again."
Jack hummed vaguely in acknowledgement to his words. It had been over a day since the Winter Spirit found Ace. According to Bay, the fire-user was in stable condition medically speaking. In other words, his injuries were no longer a threat to his life, with only the sand keeping him from waking. The news helped alleviate Jack's fear for his brother a little but did not fully vanquish it. It was true that the sand was slowly disappearing from Ace's skin but one bad nightmare could cause it to respawn even worse than it was before. Apparently that worry had not been enough to keep the Winter Spirit up, however.
Jack sighed, transferring his hand from his forehead to his eyes. "How long was I asleep?"
Luffy tipped his head. "A few hours. It's morning now."
The Winter Spirit frowned. "If you just came back, who was watching Ace when I was asleep?"
The rubber pirate rubbed at his nose. "Gramps was here for a bit. He left when I came in." Luffy twitched violently, skin blanching. "He expects me and Sabo to train with him later today."
"How terrible." Jack said blandly.
Luffy sat in the empty chair next beside him, shoulders hunched. "I'd face a thousand Fists of Love if it meant Ace would wake up."
Jack grimaced and ruffled his littlest brother's hair, making him pout. "There's no need for that. Ace is going to be fine."
The expected 'I know that!' or 'Of course he is!' didn't come.
Luffy stretched his neck to stare Jack in the face, looking subdued. "Ace is beating the sand, but the sand isn't the only problem he has. Everyone is so sure that Ace hurt himself. I didn't really understand why he would do that so I asked Chopper, Sabo, and Traffy some questions."
Something seemed to wrap around Jack's throat, making it harder to breathe.
"Sabo was still mad and said he didn't want to explain it. Chopper didn't want to tell me either. But Traffy did." Luffy's voice lowered. "He told me a lot of reasons why Ace might have done that. Ace might have rather dealt with physical pain instead of mental or emotional pain, or was really tired of living or… or thought he was doing us a favor by dying so we wouldn't have to care for him anymore." The rubber pirate's voice became a soft whisper as he spoke. "Traffy said those are sometimes the reasons, but might not be for Ace. I think they're all stupid and Ace should know better but… what if, when he wakes up, he doesn't?"
Jack knew what the kid was asking. What if— even after the sand was gone— Ace's mind had not been changed about harming himself? What if he had not intended to kill himself, instead mutilating his flesh for other reasons, and still thought those reasons were valid? All three of Law's explanations sounded terribly plausible and if Ace had indeed harmed himself because of them, the problem might not just go away.
"We'll just have to watch Ace and try to convince him otherwise, then." Jack said firmly.
It was not much of a plan, but it was enough for Luffy. The rubber pirate laid his head on Jack's shoulder, and the two brothers sank into their own thoughts, continuing to wait.
ROTGOPROTGOP
Ace woke in a bed. The fire-user opened his eyes slowly, taking in the familiar— and unwanted— sight of the white ceiling of the infirmary. He let his eyes roam and studied his surroundings, his gaze falling on the occupants of the three chairs set around his bed. They were certainly not the people he expected to see— making dread creep over him like an icy chill— and considered pretending to still be out cold.
Tooth spotted him before he could think to try. "You're awake."
Ace's stomach locked up tight at her tone. She spoke softly and robotically, like she was trying to keep her voice under control. When the fire-user attempted to meet her eyes, she avoided his gaze, staring at her hands. Ace turned to the other Guardians and instantly regretted his decision, caught off guard by the coldness in Bunny's emerald stare, and the sadness in North's. The iciness sank into his flesh and bones, chilling his very core, and his mind jumped to the one explanation why the Guardians were here and upset, and Jack was noticeably absent.
Something happened to him. Not again…
Ace looked for his notebook but it was nowhere in sight, leaving him unable to ask the question he so desperately needed answered.
North sensed his dilemma. "Jack is fine. He will return soon. We just wished to speak with you."
The Summer Spirit uselessly looked for his notebook again, sighed, and raised his eyebrow questioningly.
Bunny growled. "Don't give us that look, ya dero."
Ace did not know what that word meant, but the Pooka's tone implied that it was not a term of endearment. Tooth took a deep breath, leaning forward so the fire-user had no choice but to look her in the eyes.
"Is it true?" she asked shakily. "Did you kill all those people?"
Remorse settled heavily in Ace's chest, accompanied by feelings of shame and horror. He forced himself not to drop his gaze because doing so was just as revealing as voicing his guilt. He saw Bunny's paw tighten around his forearm, while North looked anywhere except at the Summer Spirit.
"…Okay." Tooth said eventually, taking his small reaction as confirmation. "I know that you're a Nature Spirit and that makes you a bit… wild, but that doesn't mean you can go around incinerating humans that anger you." As she continued, her voice remained gentle and distant— though slightly strained.
Ace could tell she was struggling, choosing each word carefully before she voiced it. It was like she was speaking to a sociopathic child or a madman waving around a gun. One wrong word would cause an explosion, and take the lives of dozens of innocents. The comprehension that Tooth thought Ace was that type of person— that he was capable of such wanton destruction and murder— hurt deeply. He was not some immoral demon who flew around killing humans for fun. He only killed to protect, or when he was attacked first.
The Summer Spirit blinked and spotted his notebook on the bedside table. Brushing aside his confusion about how he had missed it before, he picked it up. "It's true. I did kill some humans. They were Marines that threatened to kill Marco. They had a gun to his head." He shuddered as he recalled the ordeal.
The Guardians did not sympathize with his distress. Tooth looked ready to cry, one hand pressed to her cheek like she was trying not to put it over her mouth. Bunny's eyes blazed with anger. And North still refused to even look at Ace, barely glancing at the notebook long enough to read the words.
"And now you're making excuses." Bunny sneered. "Looks like we've got ourselves a real mongrel, don't we?"
Ace lost his internal battle and looked down, unable to meet their upset and furious eyes any longer.
"Don't call him that, Bunny." Surprisingly, Tooth came to his defense. "We just need to make him understand—"
"Understand what?" the Pooka demanded. "That killing is wrong? Don't even bother, Tooth. He already knows that but he doesn't care." Emerald orbs turned to Ace, filled with disgust and anger, and the Guardian of Hope sneered. "He massacred a whole ship even though it wasn't necessary. He's rotten inside. A murderer. Just like his father—"
"Enough, Bunny." North said.
The Cossack sounded exhausted. He sat beside Ace's bed, each movement slow and showing his great age, and leaned forward, putting a hand on the Summer Spirit's shoulder. Naturally, Ace stiffened, but quickly decided that the disappointment in North's eyes was far worse than the unwanted contact.
"Jack told us so much about you, you know." The Guardian of Wonder said quietly. "I know that flaws are often unnoticed by those we love, but I never thought your flaws would involve something like this. You murdered innocent people, Ace. And you do not feel bad about your actions. You only feel bad that we found out about it."
There was genuine pain in his tone and Ace could feel his guilt smothering him. North's other hand settled on his free shoulder, squeezing just a little too tightly to be comfortable.
"Spirits are granted great power and are expected to use that power responsibly. There is a reason rules are set in place on Earth to keep us from taking our anger out on humans. And yet you think you can just sink a ship with no consequences? With no remorse?" North's hands fell from Ace's shoulders and he shook his head. "How could Manny ever think a monster like you could be one of us? You're no better than Pitch!"
Ace felt lower than dirt. His thoughts scrambled for explanations and reasons for his actions, but he suspected that he was just making excuses again. The realization did nothing to strengthen the fire-user's resolve and he shut stinging eyes.
North exhaled audibly. "I know that you are young, and we have no power over you, but I encourage you to never do this again. Such vile actions will not be permitted on Earth and if you do choose to murder humans again, you will face the consequences. My only request is that you do not drag Jack down with you."
Ace's eyes snapped open and he stared at the Cossack.
North's visage was stern. "Jack is already seen as a troublemaker on Earth. Of the Guardians, he is the least trusted and respected. Some Spirits are jealous of his appointment, while others believe he is unworthy of being one of us. Association with someone like you could hurt him." Blue eyes grew earnest. "Surely you do not want that?"
Ace was nodding before he fully registered what he was agreeing with. His mind momentarily blanked before going into overdrive. It was pretty obvious the Guardians despised him for what he had done. He had broken their cardinal rule and it was understandable that they could not forgive him for that. But he had never thought Jack would be affected by his mistake. He did not want the Winter Spirit to be ostracized because of him, especially not within his first group of friends.
When the Summer Spirit continued to refrain from giving a response, North pressed onward.
"It would be best for you to cut off ties with Jack as well. You have to understand that Jack is one of us first. There is little way for the Guardians and Manny to be associated with you, but He is one of ours, and he deserves better than to be disgraced because of you. If Spirits found out that he is friends with a monster, he will be hated and shunned right after he gained the respect of those that thought he was little more than a nuisance. You don't want to hurt him like that, do you?"
Ace instinctively shook his head.
North smiled sadly. "Then let him return to where he belongs. You're only holding him back."
The desire to keep Jack in his life was instantaneous and strong, and it took a moment for Ace to see past it. In hindsight, Manny's assurances that he was not doomed to become a Guardian were too good to be true. Of course the Man in the Moon would not want a monstrous, selfish murderer on his team. The Guardians were idols, the elite of the elite, and having the twitchy Summer Spirit in their group would be the equivalent of having Pitch there. Spirits would be disgusted, and lose faith in them, and everyone's reputations would drop because they would be linked to him. Including Jack.
Jack was a Guardian. He was important and special and brought joy to so many kids. No one had believed in him though, before he had become the Guardian of Fun. He had been scorned, shunned, and rejected like an unwanted stray. Jack's tales of being chased by the Spirit of Spring, pushed into a lack by condescending sprites, and looked down upon by countless other Spirits raced through Ace's mind.
Ace wondered how he could be so idiotically self-centered. He had only cared about what others would think about him, not even considering what they might think of Jack because of him. It was almost funny to think about his earlier hissy fit now. He had freaked out about being forced to become a Guardian, when they did not even want him in the first place. Why would any of them hold the desire to bond with a stupid, arrogant, selfish Seasonal Spirit, when they had not even bothered to befriend lovable, playful, kind-hearted Jack?
"I see that you are beginning to understand." North said gently. "You know what you have to do. Break off ties with Jack and be alone. You are a Season and you do not need anyone. You'll be fine by yourself."
Ace tried to take the claims about his supposed independence to heart, but knew they were not for his sake. North only cared about Jack. He did not care about the damaged fire-user who had proven to be a monster. The Summer Spirit picked up his notebook, ignoring his trembling hands, and went to write that he agreed, and would talk to the Winter Spirit later… only to pause as a memory came to the front of his mind.
"…Why are you hugging me?" seven year-old Ace asked with a sigh, a vein twitching on his forehead. He was currently trapped in a cold embrace, long arms locked around him and keeping him from breaking free.
Jack put his chin on top of the child's head, and Ace could practically feel him smirking. "Oh, no reason."
Ace wiggled, trying to escape the grip the Winter Spirit had on him, but swiftly resigned himself to his fate. He slumped in Jack's arms and scowled— not pouted. He did not pout.
"You aren't planning a prank, are you?" he asked suspiciously.
"Nope." Jack claimed.
"Going to put ice down my shirt?"
"Nuh uh."
Ace's grey eyes narrowed. "I'm watching you."
Jack chuckled. "So suspicious. Can't a big bro just give his adorable little brother a hug?" His voice cracked at the end and Ace felt his breathing stutter.
The child twisted in the Winter Spirit's arms, peering up at him worriedly. "…Jack? Are you crying?"
"No." the Guardian said huffily. "…Not yet." he amended. "Just… let me hold you for a sec, okay kiddo?"
"If you tell me why you're sad." Ace bargained.
Jack ruffled his hair. "I'm fine."
Ace glowered. "Tell me or I won't play in your snowball fight later."
The Winter Spirit looked torn between laughing and biting his lip. "Oh no. Anything but that." He laid his hand on the child's head. "Don't worry about it, kiddo. I'm just glad you're here."
His shaky tone stopped Ace from protesting again, and the child lifted his arms to encircle the Winter Spirit's waist. Jack's grip tightened a little, almost like he was clinging to his little brother, and as Ace watched, it began to snow.
It had taken years for Ace to understand why Jack would become clingier than usual at random. When he was seven, he thought little of it. When he was ten, he thought it was because of Sabo's apparent demise. It was only when he started to gather his first crew that he gained clarity.
Jack was alone for three hundred years. Jack's existence was that of a lonely, isolated Winter Spirit. Then Jack joined the Guardians. During his journey to become one of Manny's chosen, he had saved the world and gained friends on the way. But those friends could not be around whenever the Winter Spirit needed company. Tooth and Sandy worked every day and night, Bunny and North were too busy around their holidays to pay much attention to Jack, and during those years even Jamie was usually at school or work.
So even after he became a Guardian, Jack was still lonely. He did not have a constant companion like Tooth had her Fairies and North had his Yetis and Elves. Once Ace had come to his realization, he asked the Winter Spirit about it, and Jack admitted that having someone around almost all the time was a novel experience for him and he was not used to it. Sometimes, he could not believe he was so lucky. Sometimes, he needed to make sure Ace was really there.
The revelation had been startling but expected, and little more had needed to be said. It was not brought up again, but it did not need to be. Ace had Jack and Jack had Ace and neither would ever be alone when they needed company. Logically, the Summer Spirit knew that would likely change once they got to Earth and they had to herd their opposing seasons, but the Guardians wanted more than separation due to duties. They wanted Ace to cut all ties with his brother for the sake of reputation and potential backlash.
"No."
The Summer Spirit did not remember writing the word. There it was, on the page, and what it was responding to was clear. Tooth gasped worriedly, Bunny growled, and North's expression grew solemn. Ace did not care. His thoughts appeared on the page as if he had scribed them, and he felt no need to take them back.
"I will not discard Jack like that, especially not because of 'maybes' and your bloody image. I killed to save the life of my brother and I will never regret that decision. That does not make me a monster, nor does it make me a pariah. It isn't up to you to decide if I am a bad person for Jack to be around, and it is not mine either. It's Jack's. If he decides to ditch me some day, so be it but until then I will stay with him because I promised to never leave him alone."
His expression hardened. "You may be Jack's friends, but you are not yet mine. You don't get a say on how I live my life. And as far as I'm concerned, Jack is a part of that life. Either accept that and accept me for who I am, or stay the hell away."
The Guardians and infirmary vanished, and Ace fell into white flames.
ROTGOPROTGOP
A/N: You guys don't understand how great it feels to finally write this. After so long with Ace suffering, he is finally making real progress. He is finally facing his fears. Yes!
I didn't have time to look this over after uploading it (again) so please tell me if you see any spelling mistakes, missing words, or switched words. Thanks!
Thanks to everyone who read, reviewed, favorited, and followed this story!
Responses to guest reviews:
To Guest(1): Thank you for commenting! I didn't get a guest review before yours so I don't think the other one sent. Technology can be mean like that. (pats shoulder consolingly) There, there.
To whoo: Thank you! I have a feeling you didn't appreciate the cliffhanger I left you with lol. That's why I made the chapter title 'Broken Ace'. You should never underestimate my evilness. :)
To Q: Thanks! Nice summary and reactions. Sorry, no early updates. Er, you can keep it. (backs away casually) XD
To Guest(2): Thanks for reviewing! Here's more. Please stop screaming! XD
To Guest(3): Thanks!
To ALapisNamedBob: Thank you! Yeah, a lot of stuff happened last chapter. Like I said, originally it was two chapters but I put them together. I'm glad you liked the part with Ace and the Guardians. You'll have to wait and see if there's more to that bounty. ;) A lot of people thought there would merely be a misunderstanding. I guess I subverted your expectations, which is always a good thing in my book. I like to surprise people.
Please review!