Chapter 37
Id Est Mihi, Id Non Est Tibi
"The Personality of Godhead said: Many, many births both you and I have passed. I can remember all of them, but you cannot, O subduer of the enemy!"
- B.G., 4.5
Had anything been real?
Isaac failed to hear the Counselor's morbid invitation as the many incomprehensible realities he was forced to face overwhelmed him.
Could he have ever trusted his own eyes? His own ears? His own mind?
His mind reeled, the muscles of his neck burned, his head felt so heavy. It slumped to his chest.
The Ishimura, her crew... the breathtaking evolution of the virus, even the very human perception of himself... was it all illusion? Had he completely lost his mind on his way to hell?
Isaac had reached an impass. He was no longer able to tolerate the Hive Mind's presence, and his sickness only intensified the more he resisted. Still, even so, he forced her back with everything he had.
No... no! I won't do it. I'm not gonna kill these people! This has gone far enough... I can't keep doing this...
The Hive Mind was not at all sympathetic with him; driven solely by the Marker's fate hanging in the balance, fueled to see to its proper realignment. However, Isaac's despair had by this point rendered him all but completely unresponsive to her, and she sneered at him.
You will help me one way or another, if not by your own free will.
Before Isaac could respond, the Hive Mind reached forth to seize control of his brain. Everything for him went completely black, and he suddenly found himself severed from his outer consciousness, trapped within an airless coffin of rotting filth just barely large enough to contain him. Frightened and becoming highly claustrophobic, Isaac slammed his fists all around and cried out.
"Hey! HEY! Let me the FUCK OUT OF HERE!"
He frantically tore at the walls to get out as long, snakelike tentacles emerged from all around to bind him tightly like ropes. Though he screamed for the Hive Mind to free him, he could hear absolutely nothing of his own voice as the vacuous space made sound all but impossible; but he continued to scream in vain until he was finally gagged into silence by slick, oily tendrils as they wrapped themselves around his face, slipped in between his lips and filled his mouth, throat and lungs with the virility of unchecked vines. Yet, despite his inability to see, hear or even feel anything outside of himself, the Hive Mind's voice grazed the back of his mind with crystalline clarity.
Now, we are going to do things my way. Now, this is the end.
With Isaac's consciousness blocked she proceeded to seize control of his outer body entirely, diverting all of her energy towards total physical operation of it. As she filled the void within his consciousness and surfaced to the outside world, the necromorph's psychotic behavior sobered almost instantly. His delirium waned, and he straightened his back to stare at the Overseer and his group through inhuman eyes that glowed more fiercely than before. Desiring now to speak to the unwitting group of humans, the Hive Mind tightened herself around Isaac's brain stem, cutting him off from everything save for the poison of her influence.
She raised one of his hands to his neck and wrapped the gnarled, fused mass of fingers around his throat, effectively sealing the holes of decayed flesh that had been preventing him from speaking properly. His chest cavity resonated deeply, and retracting the distorted chunks of his jaw to form the majority of a working mouth, she manipulated Isaac's vocal chords to vent heinous threats at the Overseer and his company.
"Do you think you have the right to control what you do not understand?"
Though the voice they heard was dehumanized beyond recognition, the necromorph's speech was perfectly translated, enunciated to project a contempt that was unmistakably perceived by everyone. They all froze in place with shock, including the Counselor, who had never before heard such frighteningly vocal eloquence out of a necromorph.
"Do you think you can take what is rightfully ours? To turn against us, who have served as the heralds of creation for thousands of eons before you, as you stand now, ever even existed? As the blood of our divine roots flows through even your own degenerate veins? You are the tools, you are not the Makers."
The Hive Mind paused, glaring at the group through Isaac's burning, diaphanous pupils. She then drove his body forward, ignoring the high pitched screeches of the necromorph larvae still writhing at his feet as they became crushed beneath the heavy weight of his boots. She raised his arm to point at the Overseer with the long, acicular barbs of his left hand, still dripping with blood from his fingertips.
"And yet you dare have the enterprise to adorn yourself with blasphemous idols, imagining that you have power over us! Human heretic, your imperious sense of entitlement fascinates me."
The Overseer just stared speechlessly at the fearsome beast as it spoke to him, until he felt a burning sensation upon the side of his neck - and he was startled to discover that the silver Unitology broach clasped to his collar had somehow ignited into flames. He panicked and quickly reached for the burning article, tore it frantically from his collar and tossed it to the ground. All eyes turned to it as it bounced down the bridge, rolling and tumbling like a miniature fireball until the flames' intensity finally liquefied the metal and it extinguished into a pool of melted silver. As they stared at the smoldering remnants of the broach upon the bridge, the Hive Mind leaned in and with Isaac's eyes burned deep into the Overseer's soul.
"The Marker does not belong to you. You belong to the Marker."
The soldiers closed in defensively around the Overseer, fearful that the creature might attack. But the flexing of their military prowess did nothing to check the Hive Mind, who relished the taste of their poorly subdued fear, and parting Isaac's lips she extended the black tendril of his tongue to lick at the infectious blood clinging to his fangs. The Overseer, who was at his wit's end with fear, reached wildly for his divet and aimed it directly at the necromorph in an act of pure desperation.
"You... stay back, or I'll shoot you right in the fucking head, you, you demon!"
In direct response to the Overseer's rather meaningless threat, the Hive Mind penetrated him with a burning glare that tore all confidence from the old man. Knowing he could not confront the necromorph with such an inefficient weapon, the Overseer slowly lowered it; however, rather than submitting to complete surrender, his desire to exact his anger upon some responsible party instead drove him to seek out a more desirable target – and he coldly turned his divet on the Counselor.
The woman was unfazed by his actions; with a tight, vehement grin she completely disregarded the divet in his hands and scoffed at him.
"This... demon speaks the truth, all right. You certainly are a degenerate."
The Overseer glared at her, all the more astonished by her defiant behavior, but she paid him no mind.
"Even now, as you stand in the presence of that which you seek as a so-called Unitologist... you fail to recognize the majesty of your Enigma before you."
The Overseer was stunned by her words, and the Counselor motioned to the squad leader. The soldier stepped forward, hesitantly taking aim with the steel tipped barrel of his pulse rifle at the Overseer and meeting the old man's eyes with a look of futility.
"Believe me, Sir... we're outnumbered. Just do what she says."
The Overseer's eyes jumped frantically between them, shocked to learn that the soldiers' commitment to the Counselor ran much deeper than he initially thought, and he could do nothing else but glare incredulously at them both. The squad leader gently pried the divet from the Overseer's nerveless fingers, who in the face of his own defeat resorted to harsh, bitter chides.
"You're traitors! I'll see to it that the Church burns you all for this!"
The Counselor erupted with dark laughter that made her sound almost as inhuman and frightening as the necromorph standing behind her.
"Overseer, you ought to be more concerned with atoning for your own sins. Now is your chance."
The Overseer, thoroughly incensed by her arrogance, furrowed his thick, silver brows.
"Well, Madam... If you deem me as having acted from a platform of -"
Suddenly and without warning, the Hive Mind lashed out viciously with the razor sharp barbs of Isaac's hand, cutting the Overseer's voice untimely short as the blades effortlessly sliced through the flesh and bone of the man's collar. The Overseer wobbled in shock upon his feet as his brain struggled to process the fatal strike, and as gravity took its hold, dark blood slowly began to languish forth from the deep incision across his chest. A moment later, the completely severed upper portion of his torso then slid from the rest of his frame to the ground with a sickening thud.
The soldiers, startled by the murderous assault, all shouted and readied their weapons in preparation to fire upon Isaac, but the Counselor frantically yanked off her oxygen mask and leapt in front of them, blocking their sights with her own body and grabbing at their guns with wild hands.
"No! NO! Hold your fire! Hold your motherfucking fire!"
The squad leader at first attempted to wrestle the woman off of his company, but the moment he put his hands upon her the necromorph's hostility increased a tenfold. Isaac lurched aggressively towards their group as if about to strike, and out of fear the squad leader released his hold upon the Counselor. He nervously ordered his troops to stand down.
Still imprisoned within his own mind by the Hive Mind's cruel bondage, Isaac was all but oblivious to the sudden chaos that had broken out around him; having no access to his own outer bodily senses, he was not even aware of his being responsible for the death of the Overseer, nor for the subsequent frenzy. He was completely unable to see the old man now massacred at his feet, sliced in half, even as the Hive Mind ran Isaac's eyes hungrily over the corpse with a taste for his blood.
The Counselor, who was watching the necromorph's inquisitive expression, turned to face him as the soldiers stood behind her, and she waved her hand towards them. None of the soldiers could hear her telepathic whisper as she continued to offer them up like sacrificial articles.
They are all yours. I know that you have been here a long time, without any souls to save.
The Hive Mind darted the pitch black bullets of his eyes at her. Obviously the Counselor was not aware of Isaac's psychological confinement, and while the old woman was confident it was he on the outside she was talking to, she did not understand that she was not actually reaching him at all. Without the ability to perceive the Hive Mind's presence for herself and thinking she was alone with Isaac, the Counselor now liberally conveyed a deeply ingrained sense of adoration that the Hive Mind suspected would never have been expressed, had the Counselor been aware of the actual situation.
I've waited so long to see you again, I almost can't believe it. But enough. Please, Isaac. Take them. Regain your strength, so that you may rise.
Despite knowing the Counselor's words were not meant for her, still the Hive Mind embraced her suggestion wholeheartedly. She raised Isaac's eyes to the field of fresh bodies before him, the soldiers all of whom were unable to anticipate their impending death and Convergence with the Marker which was now just moments away, and she parted Isaac's blackened lips to bear a weary, lifeless smile.
"Your time to Converge is now. Come, embrace your fate."
The soldiers, even the most devout among them, all felt cornered like terrorized mice as the monster spewed blood and vomit throughout the ghastly, guttural choking of his invitation. The necromorph raised his arms, raining threads of filth and blood in a wet, sickening curtain, and upon this intimidating display a cacophonous roar of hundreds of outcries rose from the rocks all around them. The squad leader and his soldiers waved their weapons about nervously at the sound, having never heard such malevolent chattering before, and as they continued to look about they suddenly saw the rock formations all around begin to shift and morph before their very eyes. The squad leader stumbled backwards upon the sight.
"Huh? What the, what in all hell..."
The longer the team watched what was happening, the more they realized that the rocks were not actually rocks – they were in fact very large, vicious creatures, covered in thick, stony hide and barbed thorns that served to perfectly camouflage them among the rocky terrain until now. They manifested before the group to reveal their true forms - swift, powerful alien beasts sporting long appendages laced by delicate membranes like the wings of bats, and they were formidable enough to seriously confront the entire squadron. Their craniums were tipped with long, shaft-like protrusions that the Counselor immediately recognized as the needle sharp proboscis of the Infector species, but right away it was obvious that these infectors were much more advanced than what she had known of their kind. Their astoundingly flawless camouflage adaptation was an evolutionary bound that she was surprised to see, and these strange, new features of an otherwise familiar creature only attracted her to connect with the necromorphs, and their leader, all the more.
The squad leader and his troops came to learn very quickly, however, that these hordelike parasites did not pose the only danger to them - within seconds of their appearance, the infectors were joined by a vast army of twisted, distorted creatures emerging from the desert all around them; all of countless shapes, sizes and varieties, and heart-stopping to look at as they viciously wielded claws, talons, fangs and many other dangerous organic weaponry. Clearly outnumbered and outmatched, the soldiers came closer together to form a tightly-knit circle, surrounded by a sea of teeth and bodily blades that glimmered like daggers in the twilight. As the spitting, growling monsters drew closer, the squad leader was shocked to see the Counselor calmly leave her place next to him to take shelter at Isaac's side, deftly avoiding the onslaught of necromorphs who paid her no heed.
"Wha... Counselor!"
He stepped forward to stop her, but the surrounding horde quickly cut him off. The squad leader turned to stare vehemently at the Counselor and her necrotic companion, but he only quivered as the beast roared at them.
"Embrace us."
The horde closed in upon the soldiers, determined to destroy them. The squad leader, though suspecting the effort to be meaningless, still raised his rifle with a sense of militant duty and ordered his company to do the same. He squeezed his eyes shut, reveling in the purifying sting of his own sweat in his eyes.
"Open fire... Open fire!"
The next several minutes were filled with waves of weapons fire, mixed with the reviling, inhuman screams of the necromorphs and the agonized outcries of the squad leader and his men as death descended upon them like a hellish plague. Their symphony of widespread panic and last-moment prayers murmured from behind shuddering helmets carried loud and far across Aegis7, and as the cataclysmic bloodbath submerged them all in its wake, theirs would surely prove to be the last of any human voices to be heard on this desolate planet.
Please. I'm... I'm afraid.
He can see nothing, hear nothing. She waits until he is frantic to think that she has left him all alone.
... Don't be.
No! I'm begging you, I can't do this.
Just a little while longer.
He is shaking uncontrollably with fear and repudiation for what he has done. For what he has been forced to do. He tries to fight her.
I can... I can taste... their suffering.
What's this... are you crying, Isaac?
Fuck... Please, please stop... I can't take it... I can't... have this on my hands...
It's too late now.
Though he knows the inefficacy of it, he begs. He knows nothing else.
... Please, please, let me go...
The Hive Mind opened Isaac's eyes upon a desert field now covered in a veil of bodies and bathed in blood, gradually emptying as the necromorph horde retreated back into the shadows. As she scanned the field the Hive Mind saw the only one who remained standing – Isaac's elderly acquaintance, who was stiff as a metal rod and staring over the bloody battlefield in shock.
The Counselor's heart began to pound with trepidation as she now saw the bodies of the fallen soldiers rising up from the ground, spurred to life by the infection of the Marker. They rose calmly to their feet one by one, all with undisturbed, tranquil mien to straighten their armor and reload their weapons. They appeared to be completely unaffected by their very recent demise and transformation, and as the last soldier came to full attention the sea of eyes converged upon Isaac. Their multitude of chanting voices cascaded one after another in an unbroken ribbon of repetitive sound upon the air that even the Counselor could now hear.
Less than zero, we are reborn as one.
Upon concluding their somber hymn, the soldiers began to enter into the darkness along with the other necromorphs, emptying the field until the only ones remaining in plain sight were the Counselor and Isaac. Before they had managed to completely vanish from sight, however, it had not escaped her the eerie familiarity she was seeing in their unearthly crimson stares, the same gravity and depth in their every solid yet gracefully precise movement that she had come to unmistakably identify in the rather uncanny character of Isaac Clarke. Upon seeing this she glanced back at the last standing necromorph, and recalled now the countless hours she had spent in heated debate over the Marker's mysteries with her colleagues back on the Sprawl.
'Drawn from his image'. Just like the codex's messages had said. So, Mercer had been right.
The Hive Mind, able to hear every thought that traversed the Counselor's enfeebled brain, glanced down at her upon hearing the heartfelt amazement in her deliberations. She scanned the Counselor's inner thoughts, understanding as she listened to them that there was much this woman had to say - but not to her. Sensing her inner desire to connect with the one she had come so very far to find, the Hive Mind closed her eyes, turned inward, and released Isaac from his bondage.
Desperately awaiting release, Isaac forced his eyelids open the very moment he felt control of his body had been returned to him. He could breathe again, and through deep gasping breaths he was barely able to see through bloodshot eyes that he had apparently fallen over. He could tell by the angle of his vision that his neck had completely given out on him and his head was hanging limply to the side. Isaac darted his eyes around in search of those whom he remembered being in the presence of before falling unconscious, until they fell upon the Counselor standing before him with a look of shock. He saw no one else.
Where did everyone go?
Isaac raised his head with his hands until it was properly oriented, straining the muscles of neck to hold it upright. He then looked over the open area surrounding the Marker, and saw the remnants of bloody battle everywhere; the red oxide sand was tainted even redder by the puddles of blood and drag marks where many men had fallen, but the savage imagery was strangely offset by the fact that so much blood was somehow not accompanied by any bodies. This suggested to Isaac that enough time had elapsed in his confined state for all of the soldiers to have been killed, reanimated by the virus and withdrawn from the entire scene – a span of time that was long enough to concern him. He knew nothing of what the Hive Mind might have been doing without his awareness or consent, and such a dramatic change of events that he could not remember anything of only made him realize all the more how out of control he was. Still, as he looked around in his Marker-induced madness, he was on some distant level inexplicably relieved to see that the Counselor herself had survived.
His eyes met the matched ferocity of her own, and they both stood silently for a long moment, glaring at each other while listening to the chanting of the Marker echoing throughout both of their heads. He was still puzzled by the familiarity about this woman he couldn't seem to place, but by now he had become too exhausted to debate it any further; way too many souls had passed through his fingers to keep track of.
Isaac looked up at the Marker, tracing its harsh, blackened edges out against the dark sky, then back to the Counselor with a sense of expectancy.
...Well?
The Counselor tilted her head at him.
'Well' what?
The necromorph's milky white pupils sharpened to pinpoints.
If you're going to help me, then do it. Otherwise, please. Leave me the fuck alone.
He turned away and started to head back towards the Marker.
Isaac, stop.
He slowed upon hearing her cold, authoritative voice, and he turned around to see the old Counselor, now staring him down with a sense of rivalry burning within the scenescent spheres of her eyes. She clenched her fists and stepped toward him, intent to show that she was not afraid.
After so many years, after so much effort, you still won't spare me even a moment of your time, will you? I came all this way, for you.
Isaac eyed her tight, pretentious grin, and seeing the uncertainty in him the Counselor straightened her back and smiled.
I know what's happening to you. I understand why you're suffering.
She paused, open mouthed and about to continue, but the sorrow she could see behind his stare upon her simply robbed her of every word she had left. She could see the fire raging within his retinas - two very distinct flames, conflicting wildly with each other in a struggle for control of the same blaze - and the vision made her shiver with both fear and exhilaration to understand that along with Isaac, she was in the presence of the Marker's most divine secret. She had seen that very same energy just one other time in her life, emanating brightly from the yellow ocular masses clinging to the underside of that unspeakable monster that had emerged from the bowels of Aegis7.
The Hive Mind.
The Counselor, having known all along that Isaac was in fact carrying the Marker's precious cargo inside him, was still amazed by the reality of recognizing it. Though she had been prepared to some degree to be met with it's work upon Isaac given what she had learned about the Marker in her studies alongside Challus Mercer, still, the drastic change Isaac had been forced to undertake, and just how far his departure from humanity had taken him, was overwhelming to her in person. She could only remain silent and roll her tongue within her mouth, watching the necromorph's spastic bodily twitching with a nervous eye.
She had seen a thousand necromorphs, all at their worst, but not a single one of them had suffered anything like this.
Wanting to say something, she finally raised her voice to speak; but as she did so, it cracked like glass, and her eyebrows fell with remorse.
I'm so sorry, Isaac. I'm sorry that you had to go through all of this.
Isaac looked her over curiously, stirred by the familiarity he tasted of her on the tip of his tongue. Behind the erosion caused by her advanced age, behind the veil of haggard lines marking her face, her silver streaked hair and the declination of her physical stature, behind all of it he could see the poignant strength and defiance that only one person he knew could postulate so gracefully and with total, unforgiving perfection. She raised her chin to project a hostile smile filled with arrogance and ire at him, and in that moment, as he recognized the woman hidden beneath all of those wrinkles, it dawned upon him that he was face to face with the one piece of this enigmatic puzzle that he had been missing all along; the one he had up until now been unable to account for.
… Kendra... Kendra, please.
The Counselor's heart stopped; while this was a moment that she had anticipated for what seemed to be eons to her, still it shocked and robbed her of all breath nonetheless to hear him call her by her real name.
The name that no one had called her by for over half of a century.
Isaac's sense to reach out was inhibited only by confusion of her bewildering circumstances; he couldn't explain how she had managed to survive Aegis7, let alone age so extensively since he had last seen her. But there was no doubt in his mind that this old woman was Kendra Daniels – the same he had once known, had once loved, and had once upon a time sadly failed to come to closure with, even up to their very last moments together. Heartbroken as he was to witness the passage of time having taken such a toll upon her, he was also deeply elated to see her again. It was a priceless opportunity to perhaps set things right between them.
It's not your fault, Kendra. You did some bad things. But so did I. In the end, I guess we kinda both got what we had coming to us.
Secretly enlivened by his having remembered her so vividly after such a long time, the lines of Kendra's aged face softened and her eyes glimmered, becoming very reminiscent of the dark, captivating beauty she once flaunted in her youth. But the smile that graced her features vanished just as quickly as she was reminded of the endless, bitter tragedy that she had come to share with Isaac.
Oh... how I've always adored you. I don't even know if you ever really knew, or cared, but you always meant so much to me.
She stepped towards him, glancing sadly over the trails of blood and vile matter clinging to his degenerating skin.
That's why I have done everything I can to help you. I have done my best to give you every opportunity you've needed to finish things, to tie up the loose ends that you just couldn't seem to do on your own.
She paused, reached into her vest pocket and withdrew one of her slender, dark leaved cigarettes as a means to check herself.
You owe me, Isaac. I know you didn't really love me... I was just your emotional crutch when she didn't do, and I accept that. I can be at peace with that if you just give me what is mine, and we call it even.
As she pressed the cigarette between her pale, withered lips, her eyes shot towards Isaac to see him staring at her, examining every aspect of her. Still unable to comprehend how she could be alive, he had hardly heard anything she said; all he could think about was whether this old woman might somehow be another dire, manipulative hallucination of the Marker.
But you were dead. I saw you myself. You were definitely dead.
Kendra replied through a thick, undulating puff of smoke clinging to her lips.
Does it really matter what you think you saw, Isaac? We've played this game so many times, I don't even know what the truth is anymore.
She glanced down.
There's a lot that I don't know, a lot I cannot remember after all this time. But, there is one thing that I most definitely do remember. It is the one thing that has stood out in my mind for decades, the one thing that totally changed my entire perspective on the Marker, and on you.
He stared at her.
What did you see, Kendra? Tell me, what?
She paused in contemplation, as if becoming lost in the monumental task of assembling her wonder into words.
It was right after you killed that monster, in the crater. I was still alive... barely... and right before you ran up the ramp to the shuttle, you stopped to check me. I'm sure you thought that I was already dead, or maybe you already knew that it was all inconsequential. But I saw when you looked at me, with those eyes of yours...
Her glossy, anciently framed eyes briefly fell upon the vibrance of her memory.
Well, I really don't know if I've ever seen a god, but I am absolutely sure that I did see something very godlike in you that day.
Kendra pointed her bony fingers at him, the burning cinder of her cigarette dangling between her knuckles.
Then you went away... and that's when you started all of this. I remember lying there. I knew I was going to die, and I felt the sleep overtake me. But when I opened my eyes again, I saw that I was not dead – instead, I was very much alive, and far away from Aegis7. I was back on Earth.
As amazed to listen to her as he was superficially, Isaac already knew every detail of her journey, somewhere deep inside.
Of course, it wasn't the first time you've done this. And it was always because you couldn't let go of what had happened here. But this time, Isaac... this time, things were different. Everything went back so far... A few weeks, a few months, even a few years... that, we've done before. But this time, it was a whole fifty years that had separated us.
Isaac looked up.
Fifty years?
Did you not know what you had even done, Isaac?
Isaac's head angled slightly to the side in thought, just far enough to spill forth from the gaping holes in his exposed, rotting skull tiny, dark streams of the blood contained within it.
Yes, sort of. I mean, I should have known there was a reason you kept haunting me.
Kendra blinked.
Haunting you?
Yes. The Hive Mind... there had to be a reason she...
Isaac suddenly paused, and Kendra noticed that even through his impassive, necrotic covering he appeared to be emotionally struggling with himself. It was as if he were trapped in the cage of this decrepit, malformed body that stood pitifully before her like a rotting wooden structure about to collapse, fighting with every last ounce of life he had to break free and surface as the man he once was. As much as she felt for him, her compassion was checked by the outstanding debt she knew stood between them.
Well, it doesn't really matter. Whatever your circumstances were, I was lost. Fifty years ago, I had no way of getting back to Aegis7. The Red Marker had not even been discovered yet. No one could help me, because no one knew what had happened. Only you and I did. And without you, I was completely alone.
Seeking relief from Isaac's glaring red eyes upon her, she looked away to toss the butt of her cigarette to the ground.
There – rather, then, I was. And as it was apparently your desire, it was then I remained. At first, I thought you had done it just to spite me. I dwelled upon it. Hell, I certainly had the time to.
Even through the protective veil of her bitterness, the true, underlying hurt she was feeling was becoming obvious.
But the more I thought about it, the more I knew that there had to be some purpose behind it. I've always known you to be a very meticulous man, Isaac. The kind who leaves no detail astray.
She grinned, even as he could do little more than stare mournfully upon her.
That's when I began really examining my situation, what I could actually do to find my way back... I had to figure out what you were trying to tell me. And the most obvious choice at the time was to join the Church. Their foothold was a bit softer back then, and eagerly recruiting as they sought to expand; they were my only chance to become associated with the Marker, considering what I already knew about it that they did not. It was the perfect opportunity to find my way back to you, somehow.
Isaac caught the darkened expression spread across her wrinkled features, recognizing in her the same, all-too familiar madness that seemed to follow everyone who stood in the Marker's shadow, projecting shards of its malevolence and wonder.
At first, I was hoping that there was something they could do to help, to find you right away. But I quickly learned that they had not even established the localized division of the Marker project yet, what to speak of interplanetary travel to that location. I certainly had not anticipated having to wait out the entire fifty years to confront you again, but ironically it took me that long to truly understand my position in all of this.
She pressed a hand to her hip and looked down, slightly shaking her head.
For so long, I suffered from the same problem as you, Isaac. I couldn't let go, either. I could not let go of you... of the fact that it had chosen you.
The necromorph shifted on his feet.
It... didn't choose me, Kendra. I just happened to be there.
She narrowed her eyes.
Do you think it was an accident that you just 'happened to be there'? You think that it was some serendipitous event? Stop running from the truth, stop pretending that you're in the dark... that you're some kind of victim.
A deep resonance thundered from the creature's rotting ribcage.
Stop it, Kendra. I don't know what... what you're talking about.
You were meant to be there. Just like me. You, Isaac, are a product of the Church. Just like me.
Dammit... no.
She chuckled darkly.
We were always so much alike. I think that's what we had always liked about each other, wouldn't you agree?
This is bullshit, Kendra. There's no such thing...
I always wanted to share my special gift with you, but I should have known it would have never worked out. Ultimately, what happened here between you, me and the Hive Mind showed me that. It was always going to be only one of us, and apparently, it ended up being you.
She sighed in a vain attempt to conceal her sense of rejection.
You know, Isaac... when we first started all of this, I remember how much I hated you for that. No matter what actually happened here, you always knew deep down in your heart that I was the better choice. We all did.
I don't believe that... That can't be. That's not who I am.
The old woman scoffed at him.
It sounds like you and your mother have much to discuss. Perhaps you should go speak with her. Or maybe, you already have. Maybe that's why you've chosen to take on this totally blind attitude towards your situation.
Kendra immediately paused, realizing that her words might have been a bit insulting, if not heavy for him to take in all at one time. However, the layers of necrotic flesh encasing his twisted body made him appear so glacial and impassive that deciphering anything out of his countenance was a nearly impossible task.
But, I have to admit... it seems that sending me back so far might have been the best thing for me. It gave me all the time that I needed to really come to terms with my position, and yours. Though for a long time I was so angry with you, I knew that I, just like you, had made a mistake, too. A mistake that I would have to rectify before we could move on. I would have to let go of everything, and help you finish this.
Isaac shook his head.
You... can't help me. No one can, it seems.
Kendra smiled.
That's not true, Isaac. I can help you. You knew that from the start.
She gently curtained her grin behind the wrinkles of her face and turned away, taking a few steps towards the Marker and gazing upon it with her eyes. She continued to revisit the memories she carried of her past, the many decades that had led up to her reunion with the majestic yet wholly malevolent artifact that had come to consume as much of her as it had of Isaac.
I knew that both you and the Marker needed my help, and I had to do whatever I could to see to that. So, I right away established connections with what would become the two most important factors in the Red Marker extraction project – the Church of Unitology, and the Concordance Extraction Corporation. However, doing so was a little tricky.
She finally looked away from the Marker to retrieve another of her clove-wrapped cigarettes, lighting the tip of it with a match and tossing it carelessly to the ground, all with a fluent arrogance in her posture.
After all, it was fifty years ago... I had not even been born yet. Not by far. So I was completely untraceable. I managed to register a fictitious name with Planetside Immigration, and once all of my paperwork was in order, I doctored up my training credentials and joined the CEC. It was all 'first steps'.
She smirked darkly.
Once I was in, I also realized that I had a great advantage that no one else did. I utilized what I knew about our technology now that didn't exist then, and over the course of my early employment I, 'jumped the gun'... knowing already how they were built, I presented my superiors with the blueprints for many of the tools and systems that we use today. And I didn't stop there - I made a fortune selling all kinds of patent ideas to the CEC. Seriously, just about every piece of computer and security technology that's used aboard all these ships has got my name on it.
Though is wasn't discernible to Kendra through the thick trails of blood lining his face, Isaac could not hold back a small smile at this clever woman, whose own resourcefulness and ability to turn her situation into everything she needed to succeed definitely rivaled that of his own, if not surpassing it in many ways. It then dawned upon him that he had never really been presented with the old Counselor's name, even during his extended stay aboard the Sprawl. It had been standard practice for security purposes within the circles closest to the Marker Extraction project that Vested Counselors were never referred to by their personal monikers - only by their titles or RIG IDs. He now turned to look at her, scanning her RIG through his psychic capacity in order to see to whom it was registered.
[G. Schofield _ Senior Administrative Counsel_3A]
Isaac blinked.
Schofield?
He suddenly had a thought, turned to the plasma cutter still attached to his side and pulled it from his belt with one of his mangled limbs. The deformed fingers at the tip of it were incapable of holding the tool properly and it dropped to the ground, skidding a couple of feet across the sand at Isaac's feet. He craned his neck to look down upon it, examining the steel plated manufacturer's label that was bolted to the handle.
[SCHOFIELD TOOLS]
[The Extra-Terrestrial Mining Tool Leader]
Isaac's eyes widened in shock. He looked up to Kendra, and lifted his chin to project a devilish grin through his split jaws.
Heh... What a... smart girl you are. I am... impressed, my dear.
Kendra smirked to the side, her ruthlessly alluring nature toning her fossilized features as she replied with secretive infatuation.
I learned from the best, Isaac.
They stared upon one another for a long moment before Kendra's smile finally faded, and she hardened once again as she turned away.
Through my talent, my affiliation with the Church became inevitable.
Your talent?
My memories... which, in my situation, was instead perceived as an ability to predict the future. That was the only way I could get close enough to impart unto them what I knew about the Marker. With this 'talent', as they saw it, I was able to rise through the ranks quickly. Since I had no other purpose than to get back to Aegis7 and to you, I gave everything that I had, and everything that I made working for the CEC, directly to the Church.
Kendra grinned sardonically as she stared upon the Marker's chiseled edges.
As my 'premonitions' started coming to pass one by one, those devout worms quickly started seeing me as something of a soothsayer. Of course, that's not what I was... I was merely a victim of your circumstances, but no one back then knew anything about that. I was the only one with a secret, and I rode that secret all the way to the top. Eventually, I was promoted to Senior Administrative Counselor right beneath the Overseers, especially those who were tied at the hip to EarthGov, and in time I had the eyes and ears of every influential force within the Church and the USO at the Council's back.
She began to pace back and forth, and Isaac's blood red eyes followed her eager movements.
You... you didn't have anything to do with what happened to... to me... being meant to be there, you say... did you?
Kendra's pacing stopped and she looked at him.
No, Isaac. Everything that happened with you throughout the years, I remained a silent observer of, and nothing more. I knew it was so important not to interfere with your life as much as possible, except in rare circumstances where I was forced into it.
So, you... you did see me, all those years ago?
Kendra nodded and held her ground as he started toward her. His forward stride seemed almost like the predatory approach of a massive kodiak bear at his size.
Yes. I was a Counselor to your mother during the period of her later pregnancy, through your birth, and into early childhood. After that, I severed my direct contact with you, leaving to serve abroad for many years. Though I kept tabs on your progress throughout the time, I did not see or speak with you again until decades later - after you were recovered from the Ishimura.
Isaac looked down, trying so hard to recall having seen this woman in his younger life. Kendra appeared to be suddenly taken over by a sense of grief that became obvious as she glanced down.
I... I know what happened, Isaac. I was there. I know what those people did to you, when you were just a little boy... what your mother let them do. I know.
Isaac raised his monstrous hands before him, looking down into them as he sadly remembered some of the most dismal moments of his past.
Why... why didn't you do something? Did you... really hate me that much?
There was nothing I could do, Isaac. It was very clear that your fate was established well before any of us. I had no access or control to any of those... 'experiments'. Your mother, as much as she trusted me, saw to that. I'm sorry.
Kendra's face fell as she watched tears of blood slide from his eyes.
I was severely limited by her authority. I could only watch you grow from a distance, even as your father disappeared and your crazy mother pissed everything she had away to buy her Ascension to something 'better'. Even after your childhood, even well into your maturity, your mother always made sure that no one had access to you without her direct watch. Sometimes I think she was a bit wary of me.
She turned away, not wanting to continue to bear witness to the painful sight that was her old friend as he fell apart before her. She crossed her arms over her chest as a stiff desert wind suddenly swept across the field.
But I tried to learn everything I could about what it was that was so special about you, what it was that your mother was so hellbent on exploiting. I had no idea that it had anything to do with what had made me so special. That was when I really began to understand the secret that you and I share. But it would take me almost an entire lifetime, studying you - and studying my own younger iteration, after I was born - to really understand what was going on.
She slightly glanced back over her shoulder as the wind tossed the silk, charcoal toned sleeves of her uniform about like ocean waves down her arms.
Turns out that you and I are just two small pieces in a very large puzzle. The man who opened my eyes to a lot about the Marker was Challus Mercer, who, at the time I first met him, was quite an ambitious young man with grandiose ideas of serving the Church. I met him early on in my career, and even then he was already well immersed in his studies on what was then the theoretical Red Marker. With what I knew about it, we naturally became friends, and we engaged in in-depth study of both the Black and Red Markers.
Kendra shrugged her shoulders.
All those early years exposed me to a great deal about the Marker's history that I was not aware of... things that a lot of people, including most Unitologists, are not aware of. And one of the things that I learned is that you and I are two of their keys, Isaac.
Isaac tilted his head.
'Keys'? What do you mean 'keys'?
Those who were molded for a specific purpose, by those who raised us, to serve as future Makers. This knowledge was based entirely on the research findings of the Originals.
Originals?
Kendra nodded with a small, excited smile.
Yes – the first scientists who had studied the Black Marker, over 200 years ago. Their founding research came to be considered sacred by the Church after Altman's death, and it became the foundation for the entire faith. This research was handed down through the generations in secrecy, all to one day find what was theorized to be the Red Marker - the artifact that had been rumored to have been reverse-engineered from the Black Marker.
Isaac looked down, as he began to recall small fractions of the knowledge that he himself had at one point in his early life been exposed to, by the nature of his arrangement. Though he had spent many years and great effort into trying to forget the unpleasant memories of his childhood spent in the hands of his mother's ever tightening bond with Unitology, he had to give them credit for their highly effective, if not questionably radical teaching methods. Even now, the extensive knowledge of the Markers they had imprinted upon him so long ago through their exploitative ways was as fresh as the day he had first been forced to memorize it.
But, the Red Marker was built by them... It's not a divine artifact. It's manmade.
Yes, but it was built using the instructions and pieces of the Black Marker, which was not of human origin. To the Church, that was all they needed to latch on to.
He shook his head.
But, what did any of that have to do with me, or with you? I don't see the relevance.
Those Original scientists knew many things about the Hive Mind. They knew things about its transmigratory nature, and most importantly, they understood the effects of the Marker's broadcast signal upon those who intercepted it. They discovered that a person's intelligence was directly related to how they perceived the signal; while most subjects were unable to understand it and succumbed to the garbled, maddening dementia, there were others who were able to not only block the dementia, but to extract the actual code that was muxed into that signal. That was when they realized that the better the human host, the more cognizant and stable the Hive Mind within it could be. This led them to conclude that the transmigratory process could be controlled, provided they were able to control the host. Seeing the need for a living being with the ability to not only withstand the Marker signal but to properly translate it, this led to the Church's deeply integrated marriage with genetic research and experimentation... which formulated the roots of our current Extraction project.
Isaac was startled by her words.
What, you mean they were tweaking with people?
Kendra glanced down thoughtfully, then nodded.
Their goal was to create the most compatible human host for the Hive Mind, and the most natural solution was to develop a hybrid – someone who was already, at least to some degree, endowed with the Marker's energy... human DNA was augmented with the DNA patterns they had originally decoded from the Black Marker. The most heavily protected data, from what little Challus and I were able to get our hands on, seemed to suggest that exploiting the Hive Mind's ability to transmigrate from one body to another, as well as that of extracting the virus in order to be introduced arbitrarily into a specific subject, was known even back in the days of the Marker's most intensive research, led by Altman himself. This was how they were able to create the human samples from which to work from. These experimental bloodlines - these human sacrifices, as it were - are in actuality the ancestors of people like you and me, and we have our Unitology connections to thank for that.
Again, Isaac could only shake his head in disbelief as he briefly thought about his crazed, Church-obsessed mother.
No. I don't believe it. That's impossible. If that were true, then wouldn't that already make us... necromorphs in a way?
I'm not sure. It was never directly suggested in the archives we found, but it could be true. Especially knowing that the Black Marker, at least at one point, housed a Hive Mind, too.
She fell silent for a moment and her brow furrowed into an almost troubled expression as she thought over what she had just said.
Maybe we really are nothing more than evolved monsters ourselves. Perhaps the Red Marker really was meant to be another step in our evolution.
Her words were strangely haunting to Isaac, and he stared upon her until she finally cleared her throat.
However, something happened with the Red Marker. Something went wrong when it was built. Mercer and I came to understand this, and that everything that happened here – rather, what was going to happen here - the outbreak, the violent necromorph breed, the Hive Mind's erratic behavior, all of it was due to this anomaly... this mistake... that was originally introduced into the Red Marker when the Black Marker's messages were somehow incorrectly decoded by the scientists. The Red Marker was, for lack of a better word, 'defective'.
Hmm. 'Defective' is too kind of a word, Kendra.
There were never any reported outbreaks in any of the studies we found on the Black Marker, not like what happened on Aegis7 and the Ishimura. This could only mean that the Black Marker's Hive Mind did not have the same effect upon the people then that the Red Marker did now. The Black Marker somehow integrated itself seamlessly among the humans who were involved with it, including Altman... but the Red Marker is slowly destroying itself, and everything it touches.
Her tone was solemn, grave.
However, despite the warnings I gave them, the Church didn't care. They went forth with the plan, anyway.
The plan?
Yes. The plan to capture the Red Marker's Hive Mind into an augmented body of their choosing, someone under their control. Based on my direction they set out to find the Red Marker first, and when they did, they sacrificed the Ishimura and the Colony in order to pave the path for us. Hence, what eventually manifested in the Kellion repair mission. You were chosen, Isaac. Along with me.
They, they knew what was going to happen? But, I volunteered for that mission!
She nodded.
Yes, and that was just a stroke of luck. If you wouldn't have, they were ready to put you under mandatory transfer. I too, in my younger iteration, was chosen for the same purpose. It was their desire to send us both, to see who would first become the alpha vessel - the Architect, the Maker... the Red Ascendant.
Her expression pulled back into a small, contentious sneer.
And, as we all have seen, it turned out that the Hive Mind chose you.
As he sensed the snakelike envy in her voice Isaac couldn't help but feel saddened by it. He now knew that her animosity toward him came not just from the bitter rejection she had to accept from their connection as failed love interests, but also the fact that she had come to feel cheated out of what could have been an opportunity of a lifetime - to serve as the host to something as otherworldly as the Red Marker, despite its flaws. Isaac growled.
So... even knowing there was something wrong with it, they still... sent us out there.
Risk is a part of every decision, Isaac.
Isaac pounded his large, bloody fists into the ground at his feet in anger.
No! Fuck that. They sent us out here to die! They had no idea what this goddamn thing was capable of... but they did it anyway...
He breathed heavily, sending trails of saliva and blood vibrating through the gaps in his throat, and he looked back at Kendra. For the first time, he saw the crack in her solid veneer, underneath to the crazed, obsessive drive to abscond with the Marker's power that had all the potential to cloud her sense of judgment, and he knew that this might put him into a very compromising position. He was about to question her when she cut him off.
Isaac... I know you think that I am your enemy. But, you must believe me when I say that I am not.
She was delving into a most sensitive subject, one he had been neglecting to take into account.
You knew that the Marker was too much for you, Isaac. Despite the assurances of the scientists to your mother and the Council that you were ready for this, in fact you were emotionally defective, incapable of controlling it properly - and somehow, you knew this. You didn't want anything to do with it. And ironically enough, as a defective creation, the Red Marker seemed to share your same fate. As you couldn't handle it, so it couldn't handle you. How tragically poetic that the two of you came together.
Kendra smiled, holding back tears through a front of ice.
And that is why I came here. To end this, to set things right. I am ready to fulfill my obligation to you, to resolve my mistake... I don't want to fight with you anymore. I just want to help you. To serve you. To set you free.
She finally stopped and stared at him, shifting her weight upon her hip with a sense of anticipation. She slowly reached to the ground near Isaac's feet, grabbed his plasma cutter and raised it, aiming it directly at him.
I promise you that this won't hurt... very much.
She stepped forward fearlessly towards Isaac, who did not make any move to stop her. He understood her true motive for coming to Aegis7 to find him – that she was in fact intent on killing him, in order to absorb the Hive Mind and take his place as the alpha vessel. And he didn't care. As tired as he was, he finally welcomed the idea that he might actually be able to rest... to sleep, for a change.
That's it. Just relax.
Kendra stopped in front of him and Isaac slowly sank to his knees, conceding to her desire and he closed his eyes. As he landed with a heavy thump upon the ground he rained drops of his blood all over her in a display that seemed eerily enchanting, as if she were being showered in a providential downpour by the Red Marker itself towering high above them both.
Let me take away your burden. Let me show you how much I really love you.
His exhausted neck muscles finally gave way and his head tumbled over, opening a perfect opportunity to sever it clean off with a well aimed blast of the cutter.
Whether you leave me brokenhearted or crush me in your embrace, I will always love you, Isaac Clarke.
The old woman finally fell silent as the gravity between them became too great to bear; her voice fell short of choking with tears and her chest rolled like a turbulent ocean tide as she continued to aim the plasma cutter with a shaking hand. Isaac glanced up at her, completely forgetting all of his misgivings with her in that moment, and as he looked deep into her eyes he saw not the old, haggard woman who stood before him. Instead, he saw the beautiful, sweetly alluring, almost celestially youthful image of the girl he once knew; he raised one of his grossly malformed hands and gently braced the side of her face, spattering her cheek with his rancid, black blood.
I always knew that, Kendra. And I really do love you, too. I'm so sorry I never showed it.
Kendra was completely taken by his act, finding the warm, congealing sensation of his blood upon her skin to speak a million words of clemency. She briefly lowered the plasma cutter, reached up and cradled her hand atop his.
You did in your own way. That's why no matter what happened, I always had faith in you.
Isaac was overwhelmed with compassion, and forgetting the barring effects of his transformation in the moment he could only see himself as he once was, back in those days when he shared the most intimate depths of himself with this woman. Continuing to stare into her eyes, he slowly leaned in and attempted to kiss her. Kendra could not resist; equally as lost upon the Marker's illusory playing field as Isaac was, she responded with perfectly unabated compliance. Seeing only the man she loved in her eyes, she embraced the necrotic beast as he leaned in over her, and they both relived a most beautiful memory they shared inside their heads.
isaac
All the while, the Hive Mind inside Isaac's head was growing ripe with fury. She understood Kendra's intent to take her on as a host, but having become so attached to Isaac, whom she had come to consider quite superior among his species, the prospect of now being forced into another body other than him was highly unpalatable. Up to now, the tragic little stage play between these two souls had been somewhat amusing to watch; but the Hive Mind had no plans on giving up her precious host any time soon.
Kendra's eyes suddenly widened in shock as she felt something slip into her throat, choking her.
i chose you
Kendra had absolutely no time to respond before the sensation she felt began to burn like hot iron, and thousands of tiny barbs from an infectious shaft that extended from Isaac's mouth embedded themselves into the skin of her throat like tiny blades.
not her
She began to shake involuntarily as the barbs injected her with necrotic venom, filling her insides with corrosive acid that began to eat her alive from the inside out. She tried to scream but her mouth was entirely filled by his shaft and the burning mixture had already dissolved her vocal chords; she could only spew froth and blood, staring at Isaac in complete terror. He gripped her head in his hands, withdrew his needle-tipped shaft from her throat and unable to stop himself he proceeded to vomit all over her.
What? No! No, stop!
Isaac was frantic within to see as once again the Hive Mind coerced him with her influence, forcing him into rendering Kendra's body completely useless and uninhabitable. He went on to devour her entire upper body, her rapidly disintegrating flesh turning to slush in his talons as he chewed upon it. He cried panicked, grieving tears, forced to watch until nothing recognizable of Kendra's' body remained to be seen. Once the Hive Mind released him, Isaac collapsed to the ground.
No... you can't... you can't do this to me... She was my only chance! Why, why can't you let me go?
He stared at the bloodied, dissolved stump of Kendra's body, unable to accept what he had just done. Becoming violently ill, he suddenly disgorged what he had just consumed of her corroded flesh and bone upon the ground in front of him. He was overcome with great sorrow and shame for his unspeakable act upon her body; though in the face of all her deception and betrayal he had so many times wished that she meet with tragic circumstances, to actually see her suffer from such a fate as this, especially at his own hands, impacted him harder than he had been prepared for. No matter how much anger and hatred he may have harbored against her in the past, he realized as he stared at the gory mess at his feet that she did not deserve to suffer like this - no one did. He turned away, unable to look at her any longer.
Because I don't want her, Isaac. I want you.
He was suddenly started by the sound of the Hive Mind's voice coming from behind him. He turned quickly about to see as she approached him, stepping over Kendra's bloody remains without the slightest regard for them, and as she came close enough she ran a sharp fingernail up the length of his rotting, malformed skull, catching trails of his blood and drool along the way.
We all have to make choices. I made mine. And I say that no one else will have you... or me.
She walked past him, noting the furious, heartbroken look upon his face with sadistic delight as she came closer to the pulsating Red Marker.
I always said that I was going to be the one who would stop you in the end. To stop you from yourself. I hope you're beginning to understand that we really do belong together.
A/N
Chapters 38 and 39 have been deleted, due to complete rewrite. Revised chapters will be posted soon.