Thunder & Lightning
Chapter 35: Shopping
If he could have Freed would have blamed Bickslow for their current predicament but, sadly, the seith mage was only partly responsible. He had only himself to blame for the rest of it. Currently, Freed was standing in the middle of Magnolia's biggest mall with a pounding headache and the irresistible urge to skewer someone, namely himself.
"Wow," Mira gasped from beside him as she leaned over the railing to look at the floor below them. "Your brother's really good at causing chaos, isn't he?"
Freed gave her a look that could have melted steel. "So is your sister," he pointed at Lisanna who was in bird form and chasing after Bickslow who cackled like a maniac as the babies carried him.
"Oh, dear," Mira winced.
"Sadly enough they are nowhere near as bad as those two," Freed jabbed an accusing finger to the food court where a feminine voice could be heard shrieking in outrage.
"Aww, I was hoping that they'd finally started getting along since they're actually dating now," Mira pouted.
Freed just looked at her and shook his head. "Haven't you learned anything by now? Our siblings are incapable of acting like normal human beings which includes getting along and not destroying anything!"
"You make a good point," Mira admitted sadly.
Freed sighed and buried his face in his hands, wondering where exactly he had gone wrong in his life.
The day had started out well enough; after breakfast they had gotten dressed then journeyed to the mall. The trouble had actually started when they spotted the cotton candy machine.
"Cotton candy!" Bickslow yelled gleefully as he took off.
"Bickslow, behave yourself," Freed snapped as he followed his brother, albeit at a more sedate pace.
"Cotton candy?" Lisanna brightened.
"Not to you, sis," Elfman groaned.
"I like cotton candy," the youngest Strauss sibling frowned.
"Elfman," Mira gave her brother a warning look. "If she wants cotton candy then she can have it."
"Thank you," Lisanna kissed her sister on the cheek then ran after Bickslow and Freed.
"Morons, the whole lot of them," Evergreen groaned as she fanned herself.
"Like you can talk," Elfman snorted. "What's with the fan anyways? It's not hot."
"So I can do this," Evergreen whacked him on the head then stalked off.
"A real man doesn't hit people with a fan!" Elfman shouted as he went after her.
"Well the last time I checked I wasn't a man!" came Evergreen's retort as she ducked inside of a lingerie store.
And that was the quietest part of the day. After Bickslow and Lisanna had eaten a lot of cotton candy they then discovered the toy store which was Bickslow's absolute favorite store. It wasn't Lisanna's but she was happy when she found out that they had a huge selection of stuffed animals. Of course she dragged Bickslow to the music store afterwards so she could get the latest music lacrimas and he happily obliged.
Elfman and Evergreen went through the entire mall, shouting at each other at the top of their lungs along with the occasional fan smacks.
Freed and Mira located the coffee shop on the second floor and hid there, content in the knowledge that none of their siblings would go there.
Meanwhile Bickslow's babies had gotten bored and had decided to play pranks on everyone. Soon screams could be heard all over the store as the merchandise began flying around and chasing the customers around. Of course once the food started flying then things got even more interesting.
Lisanna, however, was a bit miffed when her stuffed animals that she had bought got covered in hot sauce so she started chasing Bickslow around the mall.
Elfman made the tragic mistake of trying to defend Evergreen's honor when some random guy tried to hit on her and was immediately subjected to a verbal and physical attack by the woman in question.
"Freed, there's some guy coming towards us," Mira said as she took another sip of her coffee.
"No doubt it's the manager," Freed sighed, putting down his cup.
It was indeed the manager who was beyond irate as he impolitely asked them to leave and never return. Freed didn't feel too bad when Bickslow stole some more cotton candy on their way out the door.
Despite getting kicked out of the mall and later the furniture store (people really needed to learn to appreciate flying furniture more) they did actually manage to buy a few things. The Strauss's had gotten some more clothes and a comfortable futon for poor Elfman to sleep on.
"I'm never going anywhere with you lot again," Freed declared as they walked back inside the house.
"It wasn't that bad," Mira said weakly.
"You obviously weren't on the same shopping trip as the rest of us," Evergreen said airily as she gracefully sat down on the couch.
"Like you can talk," Elfman snorted.
"At least she wasn't screaming about being manly every five seconds," Bickslow grumbled.
"Or making clothes chase the customers," Lisanna giggled.
"Or turning into a bird and trying to kill someone," Freed glowered.
"Hey you're the one who pulled a sword on the guy at the furniture store," Bickslow protested.
"He deserved it," Freed protested.
"He does have a point though, Freed," Mira pointed out. "You can't really yell at them for doing the exact same things that you did."
"Says the one person who didn't cause any trouble," Elfman crossed his arms.
"Well," Mira hesitated. "There was this one pair of shoes that I may have started a tug of war over," she smiled sheepishly.
"You're the one who started the riot in the shoe store? I thought that was Bickslow," Freed frowned.
"I did help a little," Bickslow admitted.
"So in other words every single one of us is responsible for causing mayhem and destruction," Freed sighed. "Wonderful. I'm going to go lie down now and see if I can get rid of this headache."
"I'll get the paper," Bickslow said cheerfully.
"Paper?" Mira questioned.
"Freed loves origami," Evergreen explained.
"The Thunder Legion and the Strauss's destroyed what?!" Makarov's yell could be heard throughout the guild hall.
A/N: Hope you guys liked! Sorry that it's not better. Thanks for all the reviews! Please read and review!