Friends With Benefits
A Glee Fan Fiction
Chapter 37

"What's up with the secret rendezvous?" Puck asked, raising his eyebrows as he walked towards the stage, where Rachel Berry was sitting, her legs dangling over the edge, cross at the ankles. She looked incredibly beautiful, in her sexy, tiny little outfit with the wedges that looked like torture devices. Her hair was glossy and shiny, falling down her back with bangs that probably needed a trim, with how close they were to her dark, deep brown eyes, covered by those thick eyelashes that could be used as weapons, making any boy fall under her spell. He propped himself up onto the stage and sat down besides her.

"Sam doesn't want me talking to you. He doesn't think its healthy for me to keep holding onto you," She explained. "Mike agrees-he says I should treat it like a bandage, and just tear it off with one quick rip," She went on. "Even Artie doesn't think I should waste anymore time and energy, focusing on you and what we had once," She concluded.

He nodded, listening to her. He supposed that those jerks were right, despite what he'd rather believe. When somebody took a glance at Rachel and his relationship, it would seem like he was the jerk-provoking little fights, getting jealous easily, moving fast for such an innocent girl. He'd gone back to his old self after they'd broken up, but it was a bit like My Sister's Keeper in the sense that nobody but the two of them knew that Rachel had insisted that it be that way once again.

Still, it bothered him that Rachel was agreeing to meet him, but only in secret because it would please Sam. It made him upset that she was worried about what Mike thought was good for and that she was taking Artie's thoughts into consideration.

Wasn't she worried about what she thought would make her happy? DIdn't she have any thoughts on the matter for herself? Or was she going to change from that confident girl he'd fallen for the year before and turn into the person who would surrender their own happiness just to please the people around her?

"And what about you? What's going to make you happy?" He wondered, angling his eyes towards her, his head still lowered towards the ground as he spoke. He didn't want to have to look at her if she was going to say that she agreed. He didn't want to have eye contact with her if she was only going to break his heart. It would hurt him too much, especially since she would then get to see just how much power she held over him. She'd be able to know how much her chose could kill him on the inside, and he didn't want her to know that. People might know he was in love, but that didn't mean he had to let everybody know he was turning into a pussy about it.

"I want...I want to be with you, but I don't want to worry them or make them upset," She whispered, lifting her head to stare at him, waiting and wishing that he'd look at her.

It was killing her that he wouldn't look at her, because she wanted to see his reaction to her words. Because she knew her words were cruel, cold, and heartless. She was willing to give up her own happiness to make others happy, but in doing so, she was also acting as if she didn't care about the boy she loved, just to please her friends. And she knew that was wrong, but she wanted to know what he thought of it, because she knew that he most likely wouldn't agree that she was wrong.

"Then...we'll keep it a secret, until you're ready to tell everybody," He nodded, turning and looking at her, that half smile he was so famous for filling his face as he looked at her, loving the way her eyes brightened up almost immediately as soon as her milk chocolate ones mixed with his hazel ones. Together, they were like Nutella.

"I don't want to have to hide you," She whispered. It was wrong of her to do that to him. To cast him aside as if he wasn't good enough for her, only to meet up with him in secretive hiding places where they'd never be discovered by other people for their make-out sessions. She didn't want to have some sort of Romeo and Juliet romance. She wanted to have a relationship in which she could walk down the halls, holding his hand so everybody knew they were together. She wanted to be able to kiss him whenever, and go out on dates. She didn't want to hide him.

"Rachel, I know that you wouldn't be hiding me because you don't think I'm good enough. You'd be hiding me so you didn't have to listen to your friends. And, honestly? I'd rather be with you, even for a small amount of time in some stupid hiding place, than not be allowed to hold you in my arms again. I just want to be with you-I don't care if its literally or figuratively. I want to be your boyfriend again, even if I can't tell anybody, because when I'm with you, I'm a better person. I don't want to be Puck anymore, but you are the only person out there who gives me the courage to be Noah again. So, if it means we have to hide for awhile, so be it. I want to be happy again, and I want you to be happy again-and high school will be over soon, and then it doesn't matter," He said, the intensity in his eyes showing only brutally honest words and emotion that couldn't be faked.

"Alright...but I'm going to tell people-slowly, but eventually, we'll be able to go public again. I'm going to slowly prepare them for it, alright?" She offered.

He didn't answer her. He just leaned in and kissed her, his hands locked on her shoulders, waiting for her response, which came almost immediately. Her arms locked around his neck, pulling him closer to her as his hands slid down her arms and settled on her waist, tugging at her hips for a moment until she was on his lap. Their tongues met and danced together for a few seconds before Rachel pulled away, still holding his neck and smiling at him.

"God, I've missed that," She muttered, leaning in to kiss him again.

"Wait-Rach, I've gotta...I had another song ready for you, if the last one didn't work," He said, jumping to his feet, holding her bridal style before setting her on her own feet. He grabbed his guitar from the case he'd brought with him and wrapped the strand around his neck, smiling at her as he started to play.

"But I wanna-"

"We've got all the time in the world for that, no shush and let me sing to you!" He told her, loving the irony of how their roles seemed to have reversed, turning her into the sex-starved one, and himself into the one with a love of performances. "Oh, by the way," He said, pausing his playing for a second. "I picked this song when I thought you were either with Finn or Sam," He told her as he resumed the notes and started to sing, loving her shocked and angry reaction.

"I was dreaming of the past/And my heart was beating fast/I began to lose control/I began to lose control/I didn't mean to hurt you/I'm sorry that I made you cry/Oh no, I didn't want to hurt you/I'm just a jealous guy/I was feeling insecure/You might not love me anymore/ I was shivering inside/I was shivering inside/Oh, I didn't mean to hurt you/I'm sorry that I made you cry/Oh, no, I didn't want to hurt you/I'm just a jealous guy/I didn't mean to hurt you/I'm sorry that I made you cry/Oh, no, I didn't want to hurt you/I'm just a jealous guy/I was trying to catch your eyes/Thought that you was trying to hide/I was swallowing my pain/I was swallowing my pain/I didn't mean to hurt you/I'm sorry that I made you cry/Oh, no, I didn't want to hurt you/I'm just a jealous guy-watch out/I'm just a jealous guy, look out, babe/I'm just a jealous guy," He finished the song smoothly, abononding his guitar so it swung around to hand from his back.

"And now you may feel free to attack me like the rock star that I just so happen to-"He never got to finish, because she raced into his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck as she kissed him. He met her with his arms around her waist, lifting her off the ground just enough as he kissed her back.

"By the way-was that song some kind of hint that I'm supposed to marry you?" He asked her, pulling away for a second and raising his eyebrows. She rolled her eyes and kissed him again.

If dating Rachel secretively meant he'd get a reaction like this from her all the time, he'd have to make it last a while. Or, maybe it was just from his incredible singing-maybe he could sing her more solos...