Now, this chapter describes Ernie getting hexed. If you think that Fred and George are too light-hearted and easy-going to give someone hell, you're wrong..becasue in OoTP, they do exactly that, and they even force a Slytherin boy into a vanishing cabinet if you remember! Fred and George rock! :D
They waited near the stairs leading down to the basement, which led to both the kitchen as well as the Hufflepuff common room.
Hufflepuff students were lumbering up the stairs for the breakfast. They scanned the horde of students for a blond, stupidly-portentous looking boy who was on the brink of receiving some spectacular hexes from three seemingly innocent third year girls.
Then they saw Ernie MacMillan flouncing in with a goofy-looking, shaggy brown haired guy, talking at the top of his voice with him.
When they came near enough, Fred, George and Lee accosted them.
"Ooh! Er..MacMillan?" Fred adopted the most vivacious, tacky, stupid look he could put on, grinning tawdrily at MacMillan.
MacMillan raised his brows a bit, looking ostentatiously surprised, "Do I know you?" he asked, eyes roving over their faces in succession. The goofy guy looked on goofily.
"Erm..no.." George said sweetly, batting the blonde girl's eyelids up at MacMillan, "But..we know quite a lot about you.."
"Er..we actually wanted to talk to you about a certain matter..can we, um, move somewhere out-of-the-way..? If you don't mind..." Lee asked, grinning.
MacMillan creased his brows a bit in slight uncertainty as he jerked his head once and said, "Er, fine.. See you in a bit, Gary.." he told the shaggy-haired guy.
"No no! Um, he can accompany..its fine.." Fred said, now bestowing his tacky smile on Gary, who grinned back at Fred hesitantly.
They made their way down the stairs, against the upward current of the Hufflepuff students making their way up toward the Great Hall, rounded a dark corner, moved along a passageway with tapestries, turned right, and pushed open a crumbling wooden door, which creaked open into an empty, cellar-like room with a cool, dank air.
"So..er..we wanted to discuss something really important.." Fred piped cheerily, smiling pleasantly at Ernie.
"You are the captain of the gobstone's team, aren't you?" Lee asked admiringly.
Hmm..nice tactic...Fred thought, his brain working at top speed, rustling up what to say after Ernie gives his reply.
"Yes," Ernie nodded once, narrowing his eyes as though appraising them.
"Well..we've heard how nicely you handle your captaincy, you know..and we were wondering if.." Fred was cooking up wildly, all the while a fake, cheap smile plastered on his face.
"If we could enter the team.." the blonde girl looked at him with puppy-dog eyes, and suddenly, in that inapt moment, Fred was cruelly reminded of something by that look on the girl's face..
The scene playing before his mind's eye in a dreamy slow-motion...
The look on George's face when he pleaded with their mum to not burn the order forms for their joke stuff last summer. It was the only time he felt incalculable resentment toward their mum for making George cry and belittling their ambitions..the only time he roared in wild rage at his mother...
They had lied twined in a tight embrace on their bed that night, moonlight swathing them compassionately as Fred stroked George's red hair, whispered encouraging words, told him not to cry..
And Fred, standing there about to hex an arsehole who messed with him and his twin, felt a powerful something rise in him...
Something, which simmered slowly in him until then, now started burning with a renewed vigour, the flames leaping up powerfully...
They would prove their mum and Percy wrong one day...
He was broken from his reverie when he saw the blonde girl reaching out and lightly touching Ernie's arm, a beseeching look, George's beseeching look, upon her pewter-grey eyes.
And Ernie MacMillan melted right then and there as he saw the pleading, wide-eyed, cute expression on the blonde girl's face. His high and mighty features softened to that of gentleness as he flushed and fumbled and tripped over his tongue, "Oh..um..of course you can..er..you can enter your games to nomestone..er..I mean..names to gobstone list of ..er.."
"Ooooh! Thank you so much!" George gushed, "I can't believe my luck! Oh thank you!" George beamed at him, then fumbled in his girl's robes for the toffees, "I..er.." he looked at MacMillan sheepishly, "Er..here are a few toffees as my expression of gratitude.." he looked at him, smiling cutely, as he extended his arm and held out his thin, dainty hand clutching the brightly wrapped toffees.
MacMillan looked uncertain as he reached a hand and took them from George, and muttered, "Er..thanks.."
The guy named Gary had a particularly goofy grin when Fred moved closer to Ernie and said, "Now why don't you eat that, cutie pie?" and gave him an enticing wink.
Ernie, looking perplexed and amused, said, "Er.."
"C'mon," Fred nodded encouragingly, "Or we'd be really let down..." he pouted in the sexiest way he could act out.
Ernie blinked his eyes, an amused smile on his face as he looked at Fred cheaply, deeming him as a trashy slut.
"Er, fine, then.." Ernie said, amused smile still on his face as he started unwrapping the toffee.
Ha! Gotcha fooled you stupid, womanizing, moronic, shitty, skank-loving-
Ernie put the toffee into his mouth...
Chewed only once..
And...
His lips had erupted to the size of baby elephants within the blink of an eye, looking like large, red-coloured, flabby, rafflesia petals, drooping down to his knees.
It – looked – grossly – disgusting!
"AAAAAAA!" his friend Gary yelled, aghast.
Fred, George and Lee looked disgusted and appalled only for a few seconds before they burst into fits of laughter, tittering and screaming shrilly with raucous laughter.
"Look at him! Oh God!" Fred wheezed in between bouts of laughter, not even able to speak.
They could see Ernie's horror-struck eyes peering down at his own lips hanging like huge fleshy bags down to his knees, unable to make even a single sound, and then he turned around to look frantically at Gary, who let out a horrified, disgusted noise which sounded something like 'Aaaa! Uhwewurrgh!" as he did a strange juddering jig, his lower lip stretched and jutting out and his head pulled back as though trying to distance himself from Ernie...and then he turned and broke into a sprint, fleeing the cellar-like room.
"Oooh! You look so handsome, Ernie!" Lee cooed.
"Mmm look at his luscious red lips..so juicy.." Fred cruelly mocked in a sweet girly voice, smirking maliciously.
"I feel like hexing his hands too, Fr- Friend Fanny..." George corrected at the last moment, an identical smirk on his face, "The hands with which he accomplishes his extraordinary extra-curricular activities..apart from being a 'nomestone' captain.." George took out his wand slowly.
"Alright then, sweet blondie babe.." Fred said, taking out his wand from his girl's-robes, "And skanky babe," he turned to Lee, "take out your wand too..we're gonna aim a splend- Expelliarmus!" he yelled as MacMillan took out his wand hastily, who was horrified when he was disarmed splendidly by Fred and his wand flew away from his hand and fell a twenty feet away from him.
"Tut tut tut.." Fred chided, "Baddie Ernie...yeah, so I was saying, we're gonna aim a thick skin-hex which'll give his unworthy hands sea urchin-like spines..ready?" he asked George and Lee.
"Hell yeah," Lee said, looking thrilled, and George nodded enthusiastically.
"Alright, its gonna be a combo, babes..stretch out your arms and point your wands straight at his ham-like fists..now, follow my instructions," Fred said coolly as he pointed his wand at a scared stiff Ernie's clenched right fist, "Fire the hex at his right fist when I say now," he looked at the blonde girl and olive-skinned girl standing ready with their wands, then back at Ernie's fist, who started running in panic, "Now!"
Three neon blue jets of light followed him as he ran helplessly and jointly hit his right hand, which immediately turned into a spiky ball.
Fred gave a lazy flick of his wand and cast a trip jinx, and Ernie fell down on the floor in a heap as he reached a few feet away from the door.
"You can't escape now, big baddie boy.." Fred whispered dangerously, "His left hand on the count of three, one..two..three!"
And his left hand met the same fate.
Fred and George smirked triumphantly, while Lee laughed his head off.
"Now, those hexes were first-rate, and being combos, even Madam Pomfrey's treatments wont diminish their effects much...Enjoy your gorgeousness, arsehole.." Fred said nastily, threw Ernie, who now resembled a bizarre alien creature, one last glare before stepping over his sprawled form and walking out of the room with Lee and George.
Like I say everytime...please review! :D