"Heavenless"
37. This Shit Will Fuck You Up
After her bath, she returned to the room, got dressed and started to prepare her usual kit. She jotted down the incision time. Then, on the next page, she scribbled, 100% dosage.
Sam's ghost was there. He was pacing the room, going in a circle, fretting.
No, no, no, think about this. Think about this, Brigitte. How does this make sense? Let's find another way, there has to be another way.
"I appreciate the sentiment, Sam, but there is no other way." Brigitte said. She took a vial out of the fridge and took a new syringe. She loaded up the entire dose.
That's going to fuck you up, you know it will.
"I can take it."
Why don't you listen to me for once?
Brigitte turned her back to him and went to the dresser. Behind her, Sam's ghost sighed. She could almost see him running a hand through his hair in frustration.
Just think about this. You know what even the fifty percent does to you. What makes you think the whole dose is gonna be a walk in the fucking park?
"I never said it would be." Brigitte said as she wrapped the bra strap around her arm, "It's gonna hurt. It may even kill me."
His hands on her shoulders made her shiver.
It will kill you.
"That's what I said."
Silence. Then, he, reluctantly, asked; Do you think it might work?
"It's all I have."
There it was. The vein. She checked to see if she had the toothbrush near. She did.
What's the point of it all, if you die here and now?
"I'd rather die than to become a monster."
Brigitte pushed the needle in and injected the cure.