Alright well I know I said I'd update yesterday but I got caught up with watching the Lord of the Rings Marathon for two days with my friend who ended up getting the flu so I was taking care of her too:P I'm here now and that's faster than my last update hahaa! I've been reading your reviews and I see LOTS AND LOTS of different opinions and mixed feeling about this story. Right now I'm pretty much writing from bystanders perspective, the fact that Chloe and everyone else doesn't know what goes on between Lois and CL when they're alone so they don't exactly understand if their connection is real, and reminding everyone deep down the reason why Lois activated that mirror box at the same time. I hope you all are satisfied by the end of this story I want everyone to be happy and I really really really hope I can accomplish that;)

In the meantime enjoy this long chapter, we got a couple more chapters to go!

Thank you all again for your reviews and Tj don't worry I wasn't offended or anything I enjoy reading your honest opinion on the story. I mean it is a conflicting storyline with many points of view so don't worry I totally get where your coming from and I wish I could answer your questions buuutttt you're going to have to read it cause I don't spoil nothing;)

I would love to answer everyone's reviews but I'm so busy nowadays so I answer all of your questions and concerns through my story;)

ENJOY AGAIN I swear I'm done talking now:P!

Chapter 37: The Weight of Us- Sanders Bohlke

There's a cold heart, buried beneath, and warm blood, running. Secrets, are mine to keep, protected by silent sleep. I'm not ready, I'm not ready for the weight of us. The time has come, let us be brave. Shake off all your sins, the time has come, let us be brave, let us be brave.

Previously...

She shook her head, "We've been searching everywhere for him... we have no idea where he is Lois. But we're guessing that wherever the mirror box has disappeared to... then that's where our Clark is... but he's missing." There was a long, utter silence, as Lois stood frozen in place, staring at nothing in particular as Chloe looked back at J'onn and then to her cousin, "Say something please..."

Lois stared back at Chloe for what seemed like an eternity of silence, she simply stared back and forth from her to J'onn as she smirked and gave a humorless chuckle which turned into a laugh as she closed her eyes, "You're a real piece of work Chloe. Cruel enough to keep me away from Clark Luthor by giving me some kind of hope... some kind of bullshit wishful thinking that my husband's missing and possibly alive..." She continued to laugh, "You're seriously deranged to do this to me... after everything I've been through you expect me to believe you kidnapped my husband without telling anyone, and apparently LOST his body and have no idea where the Man of Steel has gone..." She laughed even harder, "You think you'd have a better story that's actually BELIEVABLE!" She held her stomach as her laughter began to get painful while she fought back the tears.

She opened her eyes as she felt two hands on her shoulder and saw J'onn standing in front of her, holding her arms in place he spoke in a gentle tone, "Chloe's not lying Lois... we're telling you the truth. Kal-El is missing... and it might be connected to the mirror box..." Lois' laughter slowly began to fade, "We're guessing if we bring back the mirror box then... Clark will come back as well. Your Clark."

Lois looked back at Chloe standing behind J'onn, voicing a look full of concern as she stared back at J'onn, who tightened his grip on her as she tried to pull away, "You're telling me that you've been trying to revive my husband, AND lost his body for MONTHS and didn't tell me until now..." She said in a quiet, shaky tone. J'onn sighed as he nodded.

Chloe stepped up, "It wasn't J'onn Lois, it was me. I was the one who didn't want to tell anyone... I didn't want to give you false hope in case we couldn't bring him back... you were grieving enough and we didn't want to add to that."

Lois huffed, "And what about all these months when he was MISSING. You didn't think to tell me before?! You didn't think this was important enough for me to know about yet?!"

"Lois-"

"So you're telling me... Clark might still be alive..." She whispered the last part.

"We don't know that Lois..." J'onn said with a sigh, "Maybe..."

Lois started trembling in J'onn's arms, "Oh god..." She shook her head as she stared back at J'onn, "How could you..." Her eyes went to Chloe as her bottom lip trembled, "HOW COULD YOU?!"

"Lois listen to me!" J'onn pleaded as she began to hyperventilate, all three unaware of a fourth party walking in at that moment, "You were right... " He explained as she continued to struggle breathing as the tears fell down her cheek, "I should've protected him... I failed you. I failed you and your son the day Kal-El left this world... I let you down, and I promised myself I'd watch over you and Christopher and protect you both with all I had, even if it meant protecting you from heartbreak if we could not revive Kal-El. We did not want to put you through the same grief of losing him all over again after giving you hope."

Lois clenched her teeth and wrenched away from J'onn's grasp, glaring at both of them "Then why didn't you tell me he was missing?! You had ALL this time! I had a right to know! I'm his wife!" She covered her face with her hands, "Oh god... I... Luthor and I... we... Oh god..." Her heart started racing as she tried to pace her breathing, "Clark's gone... because of me..."

Chloe's lips parted as she walked towards Lois, "No Lois none of this was your fault-"

"But it is!" She exclaimed, "If I had never found that mirror box, Clark's body would still be here... and maybe even... he could be..." She ran her trembling fingers through her dark hair, "I did this..." She whispered, "It's because of me he's gone and you..." She looks directly at Chloe, "You chose to keep it from me this whole time... making me think he was tucked away in that stupid mausoleum! That there was no possibility of bringing him back!" Chloe tried to take a step towards her as Lois took a step back and held her hand towards her, "Stay the hell away from me... both of you." With that, she ran out of Watchtower.

Chloe brought her hand up to her chest, taking a deep breath. She furrowed her brows as she felt a presence behind her, her face tightened as she turned around and saw Oliver staring back at her with a dark look. He blinked once at her as Chloe's breath got caught in her throat, "Oliver... how long have you been standing there-"

"I've heard enough!" he exclaimed, "I mean I could wrap my head around the reason why you couldn't tell Lois... but why couldn't you tell me? Your husband." He said in a stern tone.

Chloe swallowed hard, "It wasn't your burden to bear Ollie... I wasn't even sure if there was a way and then-"

"It went too far to a point you'd be screwed no matter when you'd tell us... is that it?" Chloe stayed silent at that, while Oliver wiped his mouth with his hand, "Now let me get this straight, the mirror box is missing, and on top of that Clark Kent's body disappeared at the same time, so they're basically somewhere together is that right?"

J'onn sighed, "As far as we know... yes."

Oliver gave a humorless chuckle, "And we have NO idea how to get the mirror box back, therefore there's NO possible way for us to get him back either is there." No one spoke which confirmed his theory, "Perfect. I mean for all we know he could've been swapped with Luthor and is in Earth-2" He turned back to Chloe, taking a step towards her while she kept her eyes on him, "How could you keep this from me Chloe... I thought we were all done with secrets... we work as a team, and instead you decided to go rogue on this. You couldn't trust the League to help... you couldn't trust me."

"It's not like that Oliver... you were already working hard enough to retrieve the mirror box and... I thought I could handle it-"

"Well it came out either way didn't it?!" He exclaimed, "What was the plan Chloe? See if we found a way to find the box and you just sit back and wait if Clark's body would magically appear with it. What if we did find a way to get the mirror box... and Clark still didn't return... what was the plan then? Were you planning on keeping this 'burden' all to yourself?" She bit her bottom lip as Oliver huffed, "Who else knows about this?!"

J'onn cleared his throat, "Just me, Chloe... and Kara."

Oliver raised his brows, "Kara knows about this and didn't say anything considering this is her family we're talking about?!" He huffed in disbelief, "I expected more from you J'onn."

Chloe shook her head at him, "Don't blame J'onn. If you want to take it out on someone take it out on me. This whole thing was my idea, my plan, and I was the one who convinced J'onn and Kara not to say anything to spare you all from having to deal with my mistake."

"Yeah well you did a stand up job of it." Chloe tilted her head sadly at Oliver, dropping her hands to her sides, "You know what... I can't even look at you right now. You've both gone too far. We have to find that mirror box now more than ever." He shook his head as he walked away from them. Chloe fought back tears as she watched her husband leave without another word.

"What have I done..." She whispered under her breath.

Lois' Home

"You know you're gonna have to give me a piece of your cookie right?" He said playfully as he watched Chris munch on his chocolate chip cookie.

With a toothy grin, Chris extended his cookie towards Clark, "Coookee?"

He chuckled at the boy, "I'm just kidding bud you seem to be enjoying it more." Chris giggled to that and continued munching on his cookie while watching cartoons. The corner of Clark's mouth twitched as he watched the little boy in bliss, "I wonder how long it'd be before you get your powers... I first got mine at six. I tried running towards the Luthor mansion and instead ended up in Missouri." He chuckled, "I've never been so freaked out in my life. After that, came super strength when I was nine... and that's when Lionel started paying... closer attention to me." He shook away those memories. He was turning a new leaf, a new chapter in his life, where his past was nothing more than a distant memory... he had a new future to look forward to... with her. And with her he'd never have to look back. A smile unconsciously formed on his lips as he felt Chris try and climb on his lap. Clark helped him on, "You know I always thought having these powers were a curse. That I was just... an unlucky soul who just had to be different." He smirked, "I guess I thought I'd be better off in someone else's shoes..." He turned his head and stared back at the framed photo of Martha and Jonathan Kent on top of the fireplace and let out a long sigh, "Your dad was a lucky guy... he got the better end of the deal." He looked back down at his baby blues staring back at him, "One day, I'll take you to the stars Chris. When I learned to fly... I would always go up to the edge of the Earth and be able to see the world clearly from up there. It's my solitude whenever I wanted some time to myself..." he swallowed back the lump in his throat, "I know I'm... not him... but if you ever want to... I'll take you up to the stars... so you could feel a little closer to your dad..." He swallowed hard once again, tightening his hold on the little boy in his arms who was playing with his shirt, "I'd do anything for you, you know that?" The corner of his mouth curved up, "I love you Chris... so much." He was interrupted by a knock on the door. Furrowing his brows, Clark stood up, placing Chris in his playpen and went to go open the door. He let out a quiet groan as Bruce stood before him, rolling his eyes he put his hand in his pocket, "Lois isn't here." He said bluntly.

Bruce raised his brow as he walked inside past him, "Where is she?" He asked as he went towards the living room and saw Chris banging his trucks together. When he saw his uncle Bruce, Chris jumped, holding his hands up and giggled as Bruce picked him up, "Heya kiddo, I haven't seen you in a while..." He smiled back at the little boy who had his palm against his face.

Clark stared back at Bruce with Chris in his arms and felt an urge to tear them apart, and keep the boy to himself. Clearing his throat he stepped towards them, "There's no use in you staying here, Lois went to work and since that's the only reason you ever come here... I'll give her the message so..." Get the hell out, he thought.

Bruce turned to Clark, "I don't just come to see Lois, I came to check on Chris since I'm back in Metropolis."

"How long you staying till you go back to Gotham..." He asked.

With a smirk, Bruce replied, "Why you wanna get rid of me that badly so you can have Lois all to yourself?"

Rolling his eyes, Clark said, "What's between me and Lois is none of your business"

Bruce slowly raised his brow and turned to look back at Chris, "So there is a 'you and Lois'... I should've known." He gave a humorless chuckle as he put Chris down while he ran towards his room. Looking back at Chris' retreating form, he turned back to Clark, "What the hell do you think you're doing?" Clark narrowed his eyes at him and remained silent, "You thinking taking advantage of Lois while she's at her most vulnerable makes this all real?"

"You don't know anything about it" He huffed with a shake of his head, "I'm not taking advantage of anything Wayne. Lois isn't vulnerable like you see her. She's the strongest woman I know and she wasn't forced into anything, she makes her own choices." He huffed, "You don't think I know what this is all about? That your egos bruised that you got rejected and now that you finally see her moving with someone other than you it's all of a sudden 'taking advantage of her'" He shook his head as he stepped towards him, "You're pathetic."

Bruce was about to say something when he heard Chris running back to them, "Hey buddy, where'd you go?" He said with a grin while Clark kept his eyes on him.

Chris held out his toy figure out to Bruce with a smile, "Batman!" He squealed out.

Bruce chuckled as he took the toy Batman from his hands, "You still have my gift..." He laughed to himself, "And used it as a chew toy huh?" He said, remarking the bite marks all over the Batman. Kissing his forehead, and handing the toy back to him, Bruce ruffled his hair, "I got to go now buddy but I'll see you very soon okay? We'll have ice cream with mommy"

"YA!" Chris exclaimed while clapping his hands together.

Bruce stood up and straightened out his suit, turning to Clark with a nod, "Luthor." He remarked coldly as he walked past him towards the door.

Clark clenched his teeth as Bruce walked past him, turning around, he called out to Bruce, "It stings doesn't it?" Bruce stopped with his hand on the door handle as he turned back to face him with narrowed eyes, "Being in love with someone who will never love you back. It must be painful knowing you were never enough for her that she wanted ME here to be happy." He smirked back at him, "I gave her the kind of happiness you were never able to give her."

Bruce kept a cool face, staring back at him for a long moment, and Clark noticed a twinge of pity in his eyes, "And how does it feel? How does it feel knowing you're just an alternate version of who she truly loves? That when she looks into your eyes, she wishes you were someone else? Sees you as someone else." Clark's face tightened as he glared back at him, "You may have his face... but you're nothing like Clark Kent." Clark flinched at his name, while Bruce smirked back at him, "See that's the difference between you and me Luthor... I don't need to be someone else for her. You think it's Clark Luthor she loves?" He huffed as he opened the door and left without another word, leaving Clark Luthor to quench in the painful truth. He turned back and spotted her wedding photo above the fireplace, swallowing hard, he unconsciously clenched his fists. He furrowed his brow as he stared at nothing, staying in silence, until he felt a tug on his pants. Looking down he saw those baby blues staring back at him. As much as he felt like he's been hit with a million bricks, seeing that face made the pain fade just a bit... just a bit. Swallowing hard, Clark bent down to pick up the boy, and held him in his arms for as long as possible.

The leaves bristled around her as the wind brushed through her face as she walked through the field, the sun was about to set as she looked back at the horizon of the lake. Chloe continued to walk through the field and stopped in front of a tombstone. Burying her hands in her pockets, she kicked a small pebble with her feet as she stood before the stone. A small smile spread on her lips as fast as it disappeared, "Hi..." She said in a quiet, gentle tone, with a fear of being heard, of getting a response, but knew she wouldn't, "It's been a while since I came by... sorry about that." She licked her lips as she leaned forward, and brushed the leaves off of the tombstone, as she carefully sat herself down on the grass in front of the stone, crossing her legs. She stared back at his grave for a long while before looking up at the clear blue sky, "I've made a huge mess Jimmy..." She shook her head to herself, "You know Lois brought Clark Luthor here from Earth-2? I knew this was a disaster waiting to happen... and get this, they've fallen in love." She huffed as the corner of her mouth curved up, "I guess you were right, Lois and Clark are meant to be, no matter what universe they're from they always seem to be... drawn to each other." She smirked, "At first couldn't understand it. I couldn't understand how she could be as naive as to cheating destiny and bringing a different version of Clark. I mean this isn't even Clark right? He's from a parallel universe. I thought... she needed to move on, she shouldn't be held up in the past... I mean am I not seeing it clearly? Is this actually something real going on between them?" Taking a deep breath, Chloe continued, "Well I can't be a hypocrite now can I? I do know one thing for sure..." Tears pooled in her eyes as the tips of her fingers lightly brushed against the stone, "If I had the power to be with you again I'd probably have done the same. I tried once... I remember I tried to convince Clark to use the Legion ring to go back in time and save you from Davis... I mean that's no different than what Lois did right? Except you still would've been the same Jimmy..." She sighed, dropping her hands to her lap, "I love Oliver... I love him so much, and I can't imagine my life without him... but I've never forgotten you Jimmy... I've never forgotten us. You've made me so happy, and you've supported me through the hard times... and I could really use your help in figuring out how to fix this mess I've created." She wiped a tear that escaped her eye, "Please Jimmy... give me a sign... help me figure out how to help Lois. I know Clark Luthor was never meant to come to our world... but Clark Kent wasn't supposed to die either. He had so much going for him... he was going to be a father... and I tried to bring him back for that sole purpose..." She shook her head, "If Clark had actually gone back in time and saved you... I would've been forever grateful to be able to continue our lives together but... that wasn't our destiny... and now I have to give Clark back his destiny... and Clark Luthor... and Lois, and Chris... but how... How do I do that Jimmy?" She chewed on her bottom lip as she suddenly thought of something, lifting herself up, Chloe placed her hand top of the tombstone, "I have to make things right... and as far as we know there's only one way to do that... even if it means making a sacrifice." Taking a deep shaky breath, she spoke softly, "I love you..."

TBC:)