Warnings: no warnings, per se, only a note that Harry is not nearly as confident in Severus' affection for him as Severus is in Harry's. Considering Severus recently rejected him, it seems understandable to me. Also if that Latin bit is wrong, blame Google! XD I don't speak it, except for a few terms I learned from choral music. Feel free to correct it in the comments if necessary.

CHAPTER 37

Two Bodies, One Soul

Five minutes after Harry sent his letter via Fawkes, the phoenix returned alone. Hurt and betrayal lanced through Harry. Neville didn't want to come, even for this? Then he saw the letter attached to the bird's leg and hoped there was more to it than simple abandonment.

~...Letter...~

Bonding! Merlin, are you serious? It's the only way? Damn. Are you okay? Is he okay? Shite. Why am I writing this? I'll ask you in a minute.

Okay, so two minutes after Professor Snape left, Luna showed up here and let me know you would be all right. She also said she'd be needed. She wants to come to the ceremony, if that's all right with you and your friend. She's already dressed for it, so I'm guessing the Feathersprites told her it would be.

Anyway, I'm just trying to find something less… pyjama-ish for us to wear and I'll be right up. Should I get Dean? And does S. want me to bring something for him too?

Neville

~.~

Harry let out a shaky sigh and laid the letter on Dumbledore's desk. "Nev is coming. He's just looking for an outfit for us that's… well, more appropriate."

"We will transfigure something, Harry," said Severus. "Tell him not to risk waking the other boys."

"Ah. So that means Dean can't come."

Severus winced. "If he did not sleep in the same room as the beast who murdered your familiar and the one who turned on you, I would not deny him. But should the other two hear them, if they should even suspect…."

Harry nodded sadly. "I understand. I think he will too, once I talk to him about it."

"I hope so. I do not wish to exclude him. Only to protect you."

"I know."

Harry rubbed Severus' fingers and took strength from the gentle touch of his hand. Gods, he could hardly believe this. Severus cared for him too, or at least he was willing to try. They were going to be bonded in a few moments, and nothing would ever separate them after that. It was Harry's dream, and yet… he couldn't stop feeling that something would go terribly wrong.

No. Harry steeled himself against his fears and laced his fingers with Severus'. He wouldn't go into this doubting their chances. He had to have faith in his bondmate or they were doomed from the start.

With a hesitant smile, he eased Severus' hand to his heart and caressed his knuckles. "Sev, Luna is with Neville and she wants to come, if it's all right."

Severus gaped. "How did she—oh." He murmured into Harry's mind, [She foresaw the bonding?]

[Neville said she showed up dressed for one.]

Severus gave a wry chuckle. "That girl. Odd as she is, I cannot deny she is entertaining." He rubbed a thumb over Harry's hand. "And loyal. She has been as much of a support as Mister Longbottom has. Yes, she may come, as long as she is discreet. Albus?"

Dumbledore beamed. "With two witnesses who care about you both, your bond will be stronger. Of course she may come. Miss Lovegood is quite an expert at hiding secrets in plain sight."

Severus frowned. "In plain sight?"

"He means that Luna could tell the entire school flat out that we're bonded and no one would understand a word of it besides Neville and myself. And maybe Ginny." Harry shook his head wryly. "We really do need a Luna-speak dictionary. But don't worry, Sev. She's not barmy though she's certainly eccentric, and she cares about you far too much to risk your life for a bit of gossip."

Severus smoothed a bit of Harry's hair down. "If you believe she is trustworthy, then so do I. I trust your judgment."

Harry gasped and swayed into his future husband. Gods, did Severus know how much his trust meant to him? "Sev…."

Severus gave him a light kiss. "Write your reply, Harry."

"Y-yeah."

Harry stroked Severus' cheek once, but didn't push for more. Even that gentle touch had Severus quivering. Merlin, the man truly needed to have control.

With a sad smile, Harry let his hand drop and hoped that one day, Severus would be able to let go of his fears. He needed to focus on his reply anyway, preferably before Neville returned to the dorm.

~...Letter...~

Neville,

Yeah, we're okay. He's… scared, but he's trying. It'll be okay, I think, so long as I remember not to push him too hard before he's ready.

My fiancé—fiancé! Merlin, I can't believe it! Anyway, he said he'll just transfigure our kits and not to risk getting nicer clothes. This has to be secret, for everyone's sake. Which means we can't bring Dean, unfortunately. I wish he could be here, but with Seamus and Ron in the same room, it's just too risky.

Luna, though, is welcome. Just grab hold of Fawkes' tail when he comes again and he'll bring you here in a flash.

Harry

~.~

Fawkes took the note when Harry offered it and disappeared in a burst of flames.

~SSHP~

Harry stood in Dumbledore's spare room with Neville. Thanks to Dumbledore's transfiguration skills, Neville sported black and white robes in a style of classical elegance. The red rose at his lapel was a nice touch. Harry bet Luna would love him like this.

As for himself, Harry wore crimson robes with black and white accents. Black satin trim decorated with white runes and Japanese ink wash-style designs lined his hem and sleeves, and a white satin band with black designs belted his waist. He carried a white rose in his lapel, and, before he went to help Severus dress, Dumbledore had somehow managed to style Harry's hair in soft curls rather than his typical wild bird's nest.

It would take someone of Dumbledore's power to get Harry's hair to behave.

One curl in the back refused to cooperate no matter what the old man did, but Neville said to leave it. Severus knew Harry with his messy hair and all. He'd probably prefer a reminder that it was still Harry under all the fancy clothing.

Fawkes appeared in the room with a trill, giving them the sign that the others were ready.

Harry's heart hammered and his breath lodged in his throat. By gods, was he really going to do this? Would Severus back out? Merlin, he wasn't sure he could take it if Severus rejected him after kissing him so passionately. Gods. Gods. Were they making a mistake? Would Sev—

Neville laid a hand on Harry's shoulder. "Breathe, mate. He said yes, didn't he? You know, whatever other flaws he might have, Professor Snape is always good on his word."

Harry took in a shuddering breath and tried to quell the butterflies in his stomach. "Okay. I don't want him to get scared, so let's do this."

Dumbledore knocked and poked his head in the door. The man had transfigured his kit into crimson robes with golden stars and silver crescent moons—tame for his typical style. "Are you ready, Harry?"

Harry swallowed his nervousness and gave Dumbledore a firm nod. "As I'll ever be. Is he…?"

"Quite as nervous as you are, my boy, but he has not changed his mind."

Harry gave a sigh of relief. At least he wasn't the only one suffering from bonding-day jitters. "O-okay. Take me to him then."

Dumbledore smiled and waved them out of the room. "Follow me, gentlemen."

Harry took a place behind Neville on instinct and followed both men out. He saw Luna first, standing beside the entrance to Dumbledore's quarters in a pale golden Grecian-style gown. White and red roses and baby's breath cascaded down the side of her hair and golden stars graced her ears. She had even put on a bit of makeup, just enough to enhance her natural beauty without overpowering her features. Her ever-present bottlecap necklace remained of her usual eccentric style. He gave her a brief smile.

"You look beautiful, Luna. But where's—"

And then, Harry saw him.

Severus stood by Albus' hearth dressed in black and white like Neville. A red waistcoat under his black robes and the crimson rose at his lapel gave him a bit more colour than usual, and the firelight made the satin shine. Severus' throat bobbed at the sight of Harry and desire filled those beautiful ebony eyes. Harry sailed to him, love and wonder washing his fears away.

"Merlin, Severus," Harry murmured as he reached his bondmate's side. "You look… gods, you're gorgeous."

Severus' cheeks flushed. "I… I am not…."

"You are to me," Harry reminded him, and cupped one of those hot cheeks in his hand.

Severus closed his eyes and, though he trembled, dropped a kiss on Harry's palm. "I am nothing to you. You are beautiful." He opened his eyes and continued in his mental voice. [I must confess, the first time I saw you in red like this, you took my breath away.]

Harry blushed and stroked Severus' cheek. [When?]

[The first night, Harry. I changed you into red pyjamas and… you are so lovely.]

Harry couldn't resist giving the man a soft kiss. Tentatively, Severus returned it.

"Now there, boys," Dumbledore said with a chuckle. "We haven't reached that part of the ceremony yet."

Harry pulled back with a shy smile and linked his hands with Severus'. Severus rubbed Harry's knuckles once and went rigid, eyes widening with alarm.

"Albus, we forgot the bloody rings."

Albus winced. "Dear Merlin. So we have."

Harry froze, terrified. It was true that having rings made bonding easier—it gave the magic something to anchor to besides the participants themselves—but it was possible to bond without them. Perhaps in their situation, with an uneven amount of love between them, a horcrux in Harry's scar, and a soul bond on the horizon, they needed the rings—anything to make the bonding easier could only help it take—but what if Severus had only mentioned it to avoid bonding with him?

Harry stood frozen, trembling and trying to quell his fears. He had no reason to doubt the man. He knew it, and yet, he couldn't help the pit of cold dread in his belly or the fear that Severus would finally see him for the little freak he was and leave him all alone. Maybe he didn't want the risk of fighting for Harry's soul. Maybe he had decided it was simpler just to let go before he got too attat—

Severus cupped Harry's chin and brought him into a soft, soothing kiss. "Peace, little one. I will not leave you."

Harry winced. Damn it. He had promised himself he wouldn't go into this doubting his bondmate, and he had already broken it. With a sigh, he laid his head against Severus' chest and murmured an apology under his breath. Severus tucked Harry into his arms and held him close, rubbing his hand in slow circles across Harry's back.

"I am with you, Harry," Severus whispered in his ear. "Will you trust me?"

Harry sniffled and nuzzled Severus' neck. "M'sorry. I shouldn't have—just got scared."

"It's all right." Severus smoothed Harry's hair and raised his voice so the others might hear. "Harry, do you believe that free elf of yours will keep our secrets?"

"Dobby?" Harry leaned against Severus' chest and nodded. "He would die for me, not that I would ever ask that of him. And by extension, he would also do anything for you. He'll protect our secret—and us—with his life."

Severus nodded. "Dobby!"

The little elf appeared in his usual array of mismatched clothing and gasped. "Oh! Master Snapey, sir, what's being happening here?"

Harry extricated himself from his fiancé and gave Dobby a pat on his shoulder. "Severus and I are going to soul bond tonight, but you can't tell anyone that, okay? We have to keep it secret. We'll both die if it gets out."

Dobby wailed and threw his arms around Harry's neck. "Dobby will be keeping it secret, great master Harry Potter sir. Oh, I is so happy for you."

Harry hugged the little elf. "Er, do you maybe want to stay for the ceremony?"

The elf gaped, wide-eyed and teary. "You is… is asking me to witness your bond?"

"Yes, Dobby," said Severus with a wry smile. "You have earned our trust and respect. Your loyalty to Harry would help us seal the bond."

Dobby moved as if he wanted to hug Severus' legs, but he remembered Harry's warning against touching the man at the last second and threw himself around Harry's legs instead. "You is too good to Dobby, kind masters."

Harry petted the elf's head. "Ssh. That's just what friends do."

Severus nodded and gently eased Dobby back from his groom. "Dobby, before we begin, we do need your help, if you are amenable?"

Dobby nodded hard. "Dobby is glad to helps! What does you be needing?"

"The Prince family bonding rings. They…." Severus winced. "Oh. I forgot that they are warded. Only a Prince family elf could pass by…."

Dobby's ears drooped. "I's bond with you if you needs it."

Harry knelt by his side. "But you like being free, don't you, Dobby?"

Dobby nodded. "I do, Great Master Harry Potter sir. But I's give it up for you."

"I know you would, but I can think of someone else who doesn't like their freedom and needs a home." Harry gave Dumbledore a questioning look.

"Winky?" Dumbledore clapped his hands. "I believe that is an excellent idea, my boy. She has been most unhappy here, and only showed signs of life again when you gave her extra work to do."

"Yeah." Harry called, "Winky!"

~SSHP~

A few moments later, the Prince family had an ecstatic—and sober—new house elf, and Harry and Severus had their bonding rings. Harry slipped his hands into his future bondmate's and watched Severus' eyes. The man's fear showed in every feature of his face, but his eyes revealed more. Hope, wonder, and the beginnings of what Harry prayed with all his might would become love, one day.

And yet, even if Severus' emotions never developed beyond this, Harry swore to himself he would always love the man. Whatever happened, Severus would always hold his heart.

Dumbledore moved to stand before them, eyes awash with genuine affection for 'his boys.' The man was a ruthless bastard at times, but he did care for them. And Harry had meant it when he said Dumbledore had brought them together. For that, he could forgive the man's constant meddling. Probably.

Severus gave Harry a nervous smile. His hands trembled. Harry tried to soothe him with gentle sweeps of his thumbs and let devotion show clearly in his eyes. Severus wasn't ready for declarations, but he needed to know Harry would stand by his side no matter what. And Harry would. Gods help him, he would, even when it hurt.

Dumbledore cleared his throat and held their rings against his chest, wand clasped in his other hand. "Are you ready, boys?"

Severus answered in a tremulous affirmative. Merlin, his fear nearly choked Harry.

Harry held the man's cheek and whispered, "Severus, it's going to be okay." He closed his eyes and let his hand fall. "I-if you would rather not, if you don't want to do this, then you don't have to. I'll… I'll manage."

He always had, no matter how many times he wished he could just… give up. Without Severus, especially after feeling the man's kiss, it would be so much harder. He wasn't sure he'd survive. Maybe he wouldn't either way, but without Severus… Harry wouldn't want to hold on.

With a Horcrux in his head, maybe he wouldn't have a choice about it either.

Warm breath and a raspy jaw rubbed against his forehead. Severus brushed Harry's fringe out of the way and kissed him above his scar.

"I gave you my vow already," Severus whispered, lips brushing Harry's skin. "Yes, I am afraid, but I will not give you up, and you… you are my one hope…." His thoughts continued in Harry's mind. [For love, and for a normal life.]

Harry leaned into him and took a shaky breath. "Okay. Then, if… if you really want me, I'm yours."

Severus' fingers clenched around Harry's and his breath caught. "Harry…." It came out in a breathless whisper, one Harry felt Severus' strong emotion and desire behind, as well as crippling fear.

Merlin, Harry wished he knew why Severus was so damn afraid. He had no hope of helping him through something he didn't understand.

Even so, he would try.

"Yes," Severus murmured. "I want you."

Harry's blood thrummed and a thrill raced through his chest. His pulse quickened and his breath hitched.

"O-okay." He kissed Severus' cheek and leaned back. "All right, Headmaster. We're ready."

Dumbledore smiled. "Harry, after today, if you like, you have permission to refer to me as Albus in private. I consider Severus as—well, he is as close to a son as I am likely to have. You are both family now."

Harry suppressed an urge to lash out against the man. Some family he had been.

"I'll keep it in mind, sir."

'Albus' looked a bit depressed at this, but Harry wasn't about to relent. Forgiveness and acceptance did not go hand-in-hand.

"Well, let us begin." With a heavy sigh, Dumbledore began a long-winded Latin chant. Harry tried to translate for a while, but soon found more interest in studying Severus' face. The expression in his eyes alternated between alarm and hope, and Harry wished he knew how to take his fear away. He wished a simple declaration of love would do it, but Severus would only run.

"Severus," Dumbledore said, bringing Harry's attention back to the present, "are you ready for the vows?"

Severus took a deep breath and nodded.

"Repeat after me then. I, Severus Tobias Snape, hereby take you, Harry James Potter…."

Severus repeated the words and continued with his vows. Harry watched, apprehensive and praying Severus would make it through this without balking or breaking his heart.

"T-take you, Harry James Potter, as my… soul-bonded mate, from this moment on, eternally. I give to you my… m-mind, my body, my soul, and…."

He paused, eyes wide and shimmering with tears. The next words were 'my love,' but Harry knew without a doubt, Severus couldn't say them. Still, it fractured something inside him when Severus continued with, "My trust, until the end of time."

Harry dropped his head and stared at their hands, willing himself not to show his pain. It was the best Severus could do, and better than he had expected.

Even so, it took everything in him not to cry.

Severus finished his vows, then tipped Harry's face up and ran his hand over his fiancé's cheek, as if he expected to find tears. "I am so sorry."

Harry gave him a broken smile. "It's okay." But gods, it wasn't. It really wasn't.

"Harry…." Neville's voice echoed with deep concern. "A-are you…?"

"I'm fine."

Everyone in the room winced. Damn. He really needed to think of a new word.

With a shuddering sigh, he turned his face away and stared at his feet. Fawkes gave a soft trill, and light and healing eased some of the crushing agony on Harry's heart. It at least enabled him to look at his future husband without breaking into tears.

Dumbledore watched Harry with pain in his eyes. "Harry, do you wish to continue?"

Harry nodded. "I can't remember all the words, though."

"That is quite all right. Simply follow after me, as Severus did."

Harry barely suppressed a flinch. Severus certainly hadn't followed him entirely.

But Harry would. Even if their bond was unequal in the end, he wouldn't hide. He loved Severus, and this moment might be the only opportunity he ever had to show it without terrifying his skittish bondmate. He would be strong. He would prove to Severus this moment, his trust was warranted.

Besides that, only absolute love and commitment would seal a soul bond now, with so much working against it. Harry would have to make up the difference for Severus' indecision. And his love would keep the Horcrux from interfering too. Or so he hoped, at least.

He stood tall and gave Dumbledore a firm nod. Dumbledore gave him the vows, and Harry repeated them in a soft, steady voice echoing with resolution and determination. He would not let Severus down, even if his own heart was bleeding.

"I, Harry James Potter, take you, Severus Tobias Snape, as my soul-bonded mate, from this moment on and into eternity. I give to you my mind, my body, my soul, and my love, until the end of time. I vow to support you and protect you, to honour your commitment to me and to be faithful to you. I vow to cherish your gift to me—" He added on to the vows, "—however much or little that may be—and to honour you always."

Tears slipped down Severus' face. Harry brushed them away and continued in a voice soft with love and forgiveness. "Whatever may come, be it sorrow or joy, I offer everything I am to you, Severus, now and forever." He wasn't even close to the vows by this point, but the words spilled out of him, poured directly from his heart. "I take you as you are, accept you and cherish you, without condition, until the end of time. As long as I breathe, I am yours, Severus."

"H-Harry," Severus whispered, a plea in his tone.

Harry recognised he had said enough and went back to the traditional vows. "I commit myself to you as your soul-bonded mate now and forever, and will honour our bond always. So mote it be."

He held his breath and prayed his devotion would be enough to seal their bond.

Dumbledore placed his palms atop and below Severus' and Harry's left hands, pressing them together. "Jungo haec animarium in amore et fides, aeternum."

Golden light flashed over Harry's heart and linked his to Severus'. Warmth and peace flooded him, taking away the sharp edge of broken hope and his fears, and the ever-present ache in his forehead eased. Thank Merlin, it had worked. And the warmth inside him… perhaps Severus couldn't say the words—or even hear them outside of their vows—but he did care. The reflection of his affection in Harry's heart was proof of it.

Severus reeled and swayed into Harry, head coming to rest on the younger man's shoulder. "I c-can't. Can't—so… so much."

"Ssh." Harry stroked Severus' hair and kissed his cheek. "It's not a threat, Sev. I know your limits. I won't push you beyond them."

"I'm sorry," Severus whispered against Harry's neck. "Gods, I'm so sorry."

"Sev, it's okay. I said I accept you without condition. I meant it."

Severus kissed Harry's neck and withdrew, tears streaking his face, shaking with the force of Harry's love. Fawkes trilled again, and slowly, Severus regained his usual composure.

"Forgive me," he murmured.

"Nothing to forgive," Harry said, and meant it. Severus had given him everything he could. That was enough.

Dumbledore gave Harry a look full of pain and pride. "My boy, if ever we need learn how to love, I think we must only look at you."

Harry blushed and turned away. "M-might we just go on with the ceremony?"

"Of course." Dumbledore held the rings out, one in each palm. "Severus, take this ring and repeat after me as you place it on Harry's bonding finger."

Severus took a deep breath and gathered the nearest ring in his hands. "With this ring, I take you, Harry, to be my bonded mate for all eternity."

The ring, a simple gold band with a design similar to his Prince family pocketwatch, slipped over Harry's knuckles—too big, but as it reached the base of his finger, magic resized it to fit neatly against his skin. He closed and opened his hand a few times, trying to get used to the strange sensation.

"And now you, Harry," Dumbledore said.

With trembling hands, Harry picked up the other ring and slipped it over Severus' finger. "With this ring, I take you, Severus, to be my bonded mate for all eternity."

The ring resized for Severus, and the older man stared at it, his breath unsteady. His fear, wonder, and deep affection bled into Harry's heart in equal measure. Harry simply held the man's hand, hoping it would soothe him somehow.

Dumbledore chanted in Latin again. The light between the couple's hearts intensified, and Harry trembled under the onslaught of Severus' soul-deep terror. He could almost—a flash of silvery-blonde hair and cold eyes flickered into his mind, but faded before Harry could determine much beyond that.

Lucius Malfoy? Was he the one who had broken Severus? That would explain Severus' strong reaction the night Nagini had snuck into the school.

Merlin, but the world would be better off without that scum.

Severus gave Harry a frightened look, and Harry realised his anger must be bleeding through to the man. With a shake of his head and a reassuring smile, he slipped a hand into Severus' hair and caressed him, leaning his head against the older man's shoulder.

"Severus, Harry," said Dumbledore after finishing his chant, "now it is time to seal your bond with a kiss."

With a shaky sigh, Severus slipped a hand under Harry's chin and tipped up his face. "Is it enough?"

Harry answered by leaning up on his toes and kissing Severus with as much love as he could show. Severus froze, then sighed into Harry's kiss and slid his hand into the younger man's hair, easing him closer. Harry forced back tears and the fear that Severus might never truly trust him, and simply let his love spill over the only way he could.

After a long, emotional kiss, Severus moved back and pressed his lips to Harry's forehead, lingering against him.

"I pronounce you bonded mates under the family Prince," said Dumbledore with a half-smile. "I hope it brings you joy… and healing."

Severus trembled and held Harry closer. "So do I."

Harry nodded against Severus' chest and prayed for exactly that.