Hey, guys! Sorry for the delay in updating - I've been so busy lately, phew! :O

But here it is, a new chapter. It's after time skip now, so five years have passed since L died.

As always, I do appreciate all feedback, so please, please take the time to leave a review. It'll only take one minute of your time.

January 1st, 2010, Tokyo.

Fay sat at the bar, stirring her whisky soda.

It was a small place, not two blocks from her hotel, and she came there often, almost every night lately, just to have a drink by herself.

A hotel room, no matter how nice, was nothing but an empty room, and being alone was… being alone.

It gave too much room to think. And she hated it, when she remembered.

Oh, Lily. I miss you so much. I wish I was with you.

With Lily she never had time to think.

It had been five years since she'd left Japan - or not left, more like fled - panic in her blood and Kira on her heels. She had swore never to come back, but here she was. In this shady, dark bar that made her feel like she was back in the 1950's. The men in their dark business suits, having a drink, trying to postpone going home for another hour or so. The cigarette smoke in the air, the girl behind the counter, wearing a kimono and real flowers in her hair. It was a place from another world, another era - something that suited well with Fay. It was an escape of the reality, for reality sucked.

She was the only gaijjin in the bar, and the only girl too. All the other customers were men in their suits, as usual. From time to time someone approached her, but they were easily dismissed - either by pretending that she didn't speak Japanese, or by speaking it too well.

It wasn't like she was here for the company. She was here to get drunk. To numb the pain, to soothe the beast that had been eating her alive for the past five years. The one she did her best to keep dormant, whenever she was with Lily, but that was always present nevertheless. The ache in her bones, the taste of steel on her lips, the arrowhead buried deep in the muscle of her heart.

The absence of Lawl-

No, no, no, no, no!

She pushed his name off her mind. It would bring nothing but tears, and with tears came no good.

She had wept enough. The time for that was over.

"27 days." she said to her drink. "27 days of this shit hole, and then-"

And then what?

Then you'll see Light pay for what he did.

But after that? She couldn't think that far.

He had asked that of her once, a lifetime ago.

"What would you want to do, Fay?"

"I don't know. But I do know, I want there to be a lot of you, and a lot of Cava."

But he was no more. And cava tasted like tears nowadays, not like high skies, endless possibilities and stars. She never drank it anymore, only whisky, for it had a different taste - of revenge and oblivion - the only things she really needed, to get through these 27 days.

Fay stirred her drink again, and the ice cubes rattled. A sip, and another one. She wasn't nearly drunk enough. She needed a lot more whisky to sleep like the dead, to not dream.

She couldn't take the dreams.

Deep in her thoughts, Fay didn't even notice as the door of the bar opened, and two men stepped inside.

"I'm telling you! It's over between Light and Misa-Misa. I'm sure he's going to ditch her and go for Takada-"

"Matsuda, you idiot!"

That made Fay gasp, and look up. Her face went numb. Christ! It really was them - Matsuda and Aizawa.

Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

This could ruin everything!

And yet, her heart skipped a beat at the sight of Matsuda - his boyish charm still got to her. The truth was, she had missed him. It had been one of the hardest things she had ever done, to send the fake news of her suicide to him, thinking she'd never see him again.

But it had been the only option. she knew. To fake her death, so well that no matter how deeply Light dug, he would only find out the information they had made up. That Fay had actually been a french girl named Fleur la Liberté, and that she had taken her life by overdosing on benzos and painkillers, a week after leaving Japan, 2004.

It had probably saved her life. Her and Lily's.

But now, looking how all blood left Matsuda's cheeks, Fay felt like a liar - and worse. Like a traitor.

She stood up, her legs feeling like jello. Her heart was trying to escape by climbing up to her throat.

Matsuda didn't look a day older than five years ago. His dark eyes were huge, hair fell to his forehead on a way that still invited Fay to brush it to the side, and she remembered how soft it had felt on her fingers, when-

How can you think about something like that, on a moment like this? What are you, fifteen? Besides, he probably hates your guts.

Matsuda walked slowly towards her, apparently forgetting all about taking off his coat.

"F...Fay?" He stammered. "But you… you died! I got a letter-"

"That I had taken my own life?" Fay replied. "Yeah, I died."

"But-"

"I died - as much as you did, when you fell off the skyscraper. Really, Matsu… of all people I thought you'd see through it."

A silence followed her words. Matsuda kept staring at her as if she was a ghost, and that was exactly how she felt too.

"I mourned for you." he said then, his voice breaking. "I cried for you. You knew I… I cared for you, a lot. Why would you put me through something like that?"

"Idiot." muttered Aizawa. "You know why."

Fay glanced at Aizawa. She knew, he suspected Light now, that he was beginning to support Near. But Fay had made sure he had no idea she was on the case too - and she was about to keep it that way.

She turned her eyes back at Matsuda, his pale face, his burning cheeks.

"I wouldn't be alive now, if I hadn't done that." she stated. "I'm sorry that I hurt you, I really am… but it was necessary."

"You're still going on about that?" Matsuda seemed incredulous. "That nonsense about Light being Kira-"

"Keep your voice down!" Aizawa interrupted, but it seemed like no one had overheard them.

"- and you use that, to justify lying to me about your death?" Matsuda finished.

"Wow, you seem awfully disappointed that I'm not dead after all." Fay snapped, rolling her eyes. "You know, I almost killed myself for real. Maybe I should've."

"That's not what I-"

"Yeah, whatever." Suddenly Fay felt miserable, and very tired. She knew she had to get out of here, the sooner, the better.

"Fay." That was Aizawa, speaking directly to her for the first time. "Why are you in Japan? Are you with… Near?"

Fay felt her heart skipping a few beats.

Watch your words! You can't trust him, at least not around Matsuda.

"Near? I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm sure you know him. After all you two are both from Wammy's house."

"True." Fay said. "I know him, but I have no knowledge of his current whereabouts. I send him a postcard now and then, that's how close we are. So… he's on the Kira case then?"

"Yeah." Aizawa gave a nod. "I thought maybe you were with him."

Fay turned her eyes away, shrugged as if indifferent.

"I don't do that stuff anymore, not after Ryuzaki-"

-Ryuzaki died.

It had been five years. Why was it so damn hard to get those words out of her mouth?! Why did it still feel like broken glass on her lips, like a dagger in her heart?

Damn it, if you're gonna cry! Not in front of these guys!

"Anyhow," Fay managed to continue. "I'm here for a University Exchange program, I'm a guest lecturer at To-Oh. You can check it if you want to."

"Under what name?" Aizawa asked. "Fleur wasn't your real name, was it?"

"No, it wasn't." Fay shrugged. "I use the name Fiona Aswany. Doctor Aswany, if you wish."

Fay had dug out her fake ID, and gave it to Aizawa, who in turn passed it to Matsuda. But Matsuda hardly glanced at it, his eyes were fixated on hers.

"Who are you, really?" he asked. "I know nothing about you."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." Fay said, even if it hurt. "You don't."

A moment of silence, that lingered on for a rather long time.

"I am sorry." Fay said finally. "I am sorry that I had to lie to you. I only did it, to stay alive. Maybe you'll find it in your heart to forgive me one day, when this is all over. And if we are still alive, let us finally have that whisky together, shall we?"

Matsuda's eyes were like broken glass, like ice over dark water.

"I have already forgiven you." he said. "And I could have that whisky right now."

Fay's heart jumped.

Suddenly he remembered the night five years ago. When Matsuda had almost died, and she had invited him to her rooms, to have a drink. She remembered how the kiss had tasted of whisky, salt and passion, how he had pushed her against the fridge and his tongue had opened her lips.

That memory sent a gush of hot need through her core, made her cheeks blush.

Really, what are you thinking? Sleeping with the enemy? Just get the fuck out of here!

"I'm sorry, I… I can't."

"Really, Fay-"

"I can't stay okay?! I need to go!"

Fay didn't look at him, as she brushed past him in the doorway.

She got out, feeling like suffocating. Gasping for cold January air to fill her lungs.

And then the door opened behind her.

"Hey, wait! Fay! Don't go!"

"Don't go."

Those words made her heart twist. She remembered the rain, and the wind that had taken her umbrella, she remembered how water had dripped from L's hair to his neck, how he had stuffed his hands deep into his pockets, and said those words to her.

"Don't go."

And she had left nevertheless, walked through the rain to the car, walked away from him - a decision she had regretted every day these past, unbearable years.

Fay stopped, didn't turn around, but Matsuda caught up with her, and grabbed her shoulder. And then, just like that he pulled her into his arms, and kissed her.

Fay made a surprised gasp, but didn't resist. His lips were so soft, he pulled her close to his strong, lean chest, his hand finding the small of her back. Fay felt like falling, her knees went weak.

Finally he broke the kiss, his pupils dilated, his chest heaving.

"You need to stop walking away from me." he stated, slowly, very clearly.

Fay felt like she was floating in the air, like her feet didn't even touch the pavement.

"Okay." she breathed. "Yeah, okay, I can-"

But he kissed her again, stealing the rest of her sentence.

Tadaa! Here we are! So, what do you say, who should die next, haha? :D