Entry 63

It took hours for Magash to return to the ship and when she did it was to tell me Sacha was now definitely in labor.

"We can't enter the delivery area until the baby is born and the midwives are done with their work, but it shouldn't be long." She motioned for me to follow her. "Sacha was told it was time to push."

We quickly walked to the village in silence. I hoped Magash would broach the subject of her visit to her clan mother, but she obviously was not in a talkative mood. In fact her facial expression and body posture indicated she was troubled by something. Perhaps she is anxious about the impending birth or maybe Augwynne Djo predicted something distressing in Magash's future.

I decided to break the silence. "Is there anything wrong?"

She gave me a dismissive wave of her hand. "It is nothing. We can talk about it later."

I wanted to talk about it now, but the time was not right. Sacha and Jax were going to be parents and I didn't need to start a conversation that would mar their happy occasion…especially when I suspect Magash was given bad news by the elderly clan leader.

I followed my friend down the long winding tunnels deep within their holy mountain. When we came to the birthing room she put a hand up signally me to stop. She poked her head into the room before waving for me to enter. Inside I found Sacha laying in bed, covered with clean linens and looking exhausted. Jax was grinning widely as he gazed down to his swaddled son in his arms. I have never seen Jax so happy; his expression was one of pure love.

He motioned for me to come closer. "Come here and meet your nephew, Erec Pavan." I approached the baby and marveled at his tiny statue. I have had contact with children over the years but none this young. The boy had wisps of dark brown hair and dark eyes and was currently crying. Magash came up behind me and peered down at the boy.

"I am so happy for you two," Magash whispered with a noticeable hitch to her voice. Jax smiled and passed the baby over to her to hold. Magash rocked the baby gently in her arms, her dark green eyes brimming with tears. "He's beautiful."

I am not sure what standard of beauty is used when determining the attractiveness of a baby, but it must be different than from toddlers or adults. Jax and Sacha's baby was red, wrinkly and now was crying furiously.

Sacha motioned to Magash. "He's probably hungry." Magash smiled softly as she transferred the baby to his mother. When Sacha started to reposition her sheet I realized she intended to breast feed the child.

I quickly turned to give her privacy. "I will return later when you are not so busy."

I left the birthing room and wandered down the cave tunnels until I exited into the bright sunlight. There I found women milling around the open area outside the caves laughing, talking or tending to the ferocious rancors corralled at the edge of the compound. Some women were instructing young girls in the use a fighting staff, bow or knife. Everybody looked so happy. I can understand Magash's mixed feelings about whether to stay or go. I saw some men on the periphery of the community and walked over to see what they were doing.

The Singing Mountain Clan village was built on a flat expanse near the base of the mountain. At the border of the village there was a gradual dip downhill into a wide valley lined with various crops and groves of fruit trees. Toiling under the hot sun were dozens of men picking vegetables, tanning hides and caring for a small herd of meter-high horned animals with large utters. Young boys worked along side the men, carrying baskets of produce or cutting some variety of wheat crop with oversized sickles.

I turned when I heard footsteps and spied Magash walking towards me. She tried to produce a convincing smile, but I could see the tension tightening the delicate features of her face.

"Sacha is done feeding the baby, if you would like to return."

"Maybe later." I reached out and took her hand in mine. "Can we talk?"

A guarded expression clouded her face but she followed me to the side of the hill where we took a seat on the green grass. I glanced over to her. "You were crying earlier."

She looked away. "I was happy."

"You don't look happy now. Do you miss home?"

She looked at me suspiciously. "You were listening to my conversation with Kryssa, weren't you?"

Now it was my turn to avert my eyes. "Yes." I looked back to her. "Did you talk to your clan mother? Did she foretell your future?"

Her head drooped as she ran her fingers through the grass. "Yes. She saw me with child."

Although I have mixed feelings about the news I couldn't help but grin. "That's great. That is what you wanted, isn't it?"

Magash didn't return my smile. "She said a local breeding male would father my child."

"Oh," I said cautiously. "Does that mean you are staying here?"

"No," she whispered hoarsely, her voice full of despair.

"Magash, why not? You want a family. You could have it here."

She shook her head. "The clan mother said I would have a boy." Her voiced cracked when she said the words. "I cannot stay here and condemn a son to slavery."

'Ohh," I said slowly, completely understanding her reluctance. "What will you do?"

She blew out a breath. "I will return to Myrkr and help Sacha raise her son."

I scooted closer to her so I could speak in low tones. "I thought you wanted a child of your own."

She took a long pause before speaking. "I did, but I cannot see myself finding a mate and settling down like Jax and Sacha. I also can't envision myself living here and taking the chance on having a son."

I was greatly disturbed by my friend's sadness. Her dream was dying and the heartbreak I saw etched on her face produced in me great emotional distress. I feverishly contemplated the situation, trying to envision a viable solution to this problem. After a minute I came to a decision. I nervously reached over and took Magash's hand in mine. "Magash, we make a great team and we are good companions to each other. Return to Myrkr with me and we can raise a family together."

She looked at me skeptically. "You cannot father a child."

"I know, but one of those men can." I pointed down to the slaves planting and harvesting vegetables. "Take a breeding male, conceive a child, and return to Myrkr with me. I will help raise the baby."

She shook her head. "I can't allow you to make such a commitment."

"Why not?"

"You are giving up your chance at happiness to help raise a child that is not yours."

"First of all, I am already raising a boy that is not mine." I smiled at her warmly. "Magash, I'm not giving up my chance at happiness. I'm happiest when I am with you. Bereft of your company I will…I will no longer find joy in my existence. We are friends and I do not wish to lose you from my life."

She shook her head. "You are proposing too great of a sacrifice."

"What sacrifice?" I was somewhat baffled by this conversation. She always hinted that she could sense my feelings through the Force. Didn't she realize I cared for her deeply? I shifted so I was on my knees facing her. "Magash, we are already married according to the Imperial records. I want to continue being a family—you, Norro, a baby and me."

I waited for a response, but none came. Instead she turned her head, avoiding my eyes. After a while the moment became awkward. I slowly rose to my feet and turned away. "I am sorry if I made things uncomfortable between us. That was never my intent."

I heard movement behind me before slim, muscular arms circled my waist and her head rested on my back. When I sensed moisture on my tunic I realized she was crying. I turned and pulled her into my embrace. "Magash. I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry."

She snuffled, trying to suppress a sob. "These are not tears of sadness. I am happy." She hugged me tightly as she fought to keep her voice steady. "I would love to remain a family."

I leaned into her embrace and broke into a broad smile. "I would love that too."

Entry 64

After almost three weeks, we are on our way back to Myrkr. Sacha, Jax and baby Erec are well. I talked to Den on the subspace transceiver and he is planning a welcome home party for the couple. I then told him my good news, "I am going to be a father. Magash is pregnant."

After answering a barrage of questions concerning how I managed that amazing feat, Den let out a shout of excitement. Norro was also thrilled about being a big brother.

After I ended my transmission I went to galley where Magash sat sipping juice. I slid onto the bench seat next to her and placed a hand on her abdomen. "Can you sense him in the Force."

She smiled. "I sense a life. I cannot tell the sex of the child yet."

"I don't care if it is a boy or girl." I paused. "Do you think I'll be a good father?"

She gave a soft laugh before she leaned in and rested her head on my shoulder. "I am sure you will be the perfect father. You are already the ideal companion."

I felt my autonomic HRD systems kick in as a blush crossed my face. "Thank you. I can't wait to see what the future brings."

She flashed a warm smile. "What ever the future holds. We will face it together."

I grinned. "Yes, together…as a family."