Song Choice: Passive- A Perfect Circle

Chapter Thirty-Six: Fulangachd Ruigeachd A-mach (Passively Reaching Out)

It had been five days since Abhaya had been given a skin graft by Mukuro and still, the mage slept soundly underneath thick pelts. Why Mukuro had decided to help the Slayer Mage, none of Demon world could figure it out. Still, the fierce demoness commanded those under her rule to nurse the mage back to health. Her whole territory was baffled at Hiei's display towards the mage as well, noticing that he hardly left her side as she slept. Elias had barely left her either. Most of the time, he curled up against her, sleeping in the same bed with the woman who raised him as if he was blood.

He laid next to her, breathing in her scent and realizing that she no longer smelled of infection and death. Elias gently stroked his mother's hair, staring up at her sleeping face. "Hey… Hiei?" Elias murmured, not taking his eyes off his mother.

"Hm?"

"Who was the demon who gave her their skin?"

Hiei hesitated, causing Elias to peer over at him. He sat in the corner of the room, his sword and Abhaya's resting gently on his left shoulder. He closed his eyes, and simply replied, "They wished to remain anonymous."

Elias titled his head to the side. "You won't tell me?"

Hiei scoffed, his lips twitching as he repressed a smile. "There is no point."

Elias nodded, curling up against Abhaya once more. "I want to thank them, to express how much it means to me that they gave so selflessly. Even though she's an idiot… I don't know how I could cope without her."

Hiei gently opened his eyes to peer at the small hound, a smirk crooking the right side of his mouth. "I'm sure they already know that."

"You think so?"

"Yes."

Silence came over the two, causing the room to be swallowed by the lack of sound. Hiei closed his eyes once more, letting his smile fade. "Hiei?"

"Hm?"

"Thank you."

Elias had drifted off to sleep when Hiei decided to check how her wounds were doing. He peered over Abhaya's sleeping form, watching how her chest rose and fell. Her brow was lightly furrowed, her breathing heavy. Tentatively, he removed the pressurized gauze from her shoulder, his nose wrinkling from the splotches of dried blood and salve. His patch of skin was sown into hers, becoming a harsh pale patch against her warm terra cotta skin. The parts of her skin that weren't bad were starting to grow back and mesh into his, though he knew that when she was fully healed; her scars would be very grotesque. 'It's not like her scars matter. They are just another part of her. Besides…it is almost comforting to see that scar. I was able to make up for all that I have caused her…' Hiei wrinkled his nose. 'No. I still haven't made up for anything.'

He rebadged her wounds, reapplying the salve that Kurama had made with his bare hands. His fingers gently ran over the stitches, his mind racing back to five days ago.

Mukuro walked into the room where Abhaya rested with two surgeons, Hiei's slabs of skin wrapped in cloth and put on ice. Abhaya was growing weaker, her face pale and clammy from fever. She struggled to push herself up from the bed, her hair sticking to her face as she turned and looked at Mukuro. "It seems we have come just in time," She said stoically.

Abhaya nodded, feeling the two surgeons peel off her bandages and cringe. She nearly vomited at the mere smell of her flesh beginning to rot. "Lady Mukuro, we need to clean out her wounds before we do anything," said one of the surgeons.

"So be it," Mukuro said, watching as Abhaya struggled to stay still.

Mukuro turned to Hiei, who had came in behind her and said, "Keep her still."

Hiei wrinkled his nose, about to tell her to do it herself, when Abhaya rose her eyes up to meet Hiei's. He froze, watching as she wearily attempted to smile at him. He kept his eyes on hers as he walked over to her, sitting down on the bed with her and steadying her. Her breathing was rigid, her eyes drooped half closed as she placed her head on his shoulder. "I've never felt this way," She murmured as they removed the bandages on her chest.

Hiei kept his eyes on her face, trying to keep his mind off the fact that she was half naked in his arms. "What do you mean?"

"The fever, the infection. Mages only get sick if their environment is sick. I have never had the flu or a cold. I've never had an infection thanks to Elias either."

"Demon world's air is what made the infection settle in so quickly," Mukuro pipped in.

Abhaya smirked, giving a small nod. "I guess all and all, I really am just a stupid human."

Hiei smirked, "Cheh, at least you're coming to terms with that, woman."

Abhaya gently nudged him in the ribs. "Arse," She murmured with her eyes closed.

"Lord Hiei, would you tilt her a little to the left so we can clean them out?" One of the surgeons said.

Hiei did as he was asked, feeling Abhaya's weak head slide against his shoulder and nestle into the crook of his neck. They washed out her scars, making Abhaya grunt a few times against Hiei. Her hair was in the way however, so Hiei decided to make it easier on everyone and help her pull it up. He took some bandages from his pocket and cut off a strip. Delving his hand into her hair, he scooped up the unruly mass and tied it back. The two surgeons gave Hiei a look of thanks and finished washing out the wounds.

Hiei helped them put her on her back, his eyes widening a fraction as he looked at her angry red burns. He rose one of his pelts up over her breasts, covering them from prying eyes. "Lady Abhaya, we are going to give you some anesthetic. It will let you sleep for a few days to help ease your pain and help you heal. Is it alright if we administer it now?" One surgeon said.

Abhaya turned her head to look at him. Her lips quirked up into a small smile as she met his eyes. "Of course. Go right ahead."

The surgeon nodded, dumbstruck. The other surgeon prepped the needle and placed it on the crook of her right arm. Clear liquid emptied into Abhaya's veins, blood lightly oozing from the prick. Slowly she turned her head to look Hiei in the eyes. "Hiei."

Hiei rose an eyebrow in question at his mage, his hand never leaving her upper arm. "I'm sorry… I wish that I… was good."

"You're speaking nonsense."

"Chan. Tiomnach mi daonnan fath dolam ge air bith caite mi saltair. (I will always cause misery where ever I tread.)"

Abhaya then closed her eyes and fell asleep. Hiei watched as they sewed his skin to hers, wondering why she had said that to him as she had fallen asleep.

Hiei still wondered why. It had been five days, and she still slept. 'Her body will be weak when she awakens as well. They said that she might not be able to walk for a day after she wakes up.'

He took his spot in the corner of the room, beating his urge to kick Elias out of the room and lay beside her. 'These feelings are pointless…she's nothing more than a child.'

Hiei closed his eyes, his brow furrowing as he tried to pry himself into Abhaya's mind. It was no use however, she was not dreaming. He leaned back against the wall, making himself comfy as he watched her behind weary eyes. Slowly, his eyes slid closed and he drifted off into a deep sleep.

Fog flitted against muddy grass as Hiei walked through a dark field. The gold grass wetted his clothes as he tried to take in his surroundings. The night was ink black, the wind crisp, threatening icy rain. He climbed up a hill, noticing that the field was surrounded by a dense forest. The trees were barren, damp leaves skitting over the soggy ground. Hiei pressed forward, noticing that neither his nor Abhaya's sword were on him. Lightening crackled in the distance, illuminating two figures that had been otherwise invisible to him in the darkness. They stood at the top of the hill, one towering over the other smaller figure. Slowly he grew closer, only to notice that the tall figure was dressed in an almost smoke like cloak and that it held the other figure by its throat.

Lightening illuminated the pair once more, making Hiei's blood run cold. A loud snap seemed to echo in his mind as he watched horrified as the neck of his mage was bent awkward. Her body slipped from the grasp of the cloaked figure, tumbling roughly down the hill to his feet. Dead frosty blue eyes stared at him from the ground, dark chocolate curls fanned out behind her in muddy heaps.

Gently he lifted her from the sodden ground, cradling her limb body in his arms. "I'm sorry I dropped her. Do you mind bringing her to me?" The figure rasped.

Hiei shivered at the sound of its voice. It was so distorted that it even made him nervous. He peered up at it with hard eyes, baring his teeth at his enemy. Acid green slits peered curiously down at him from behind the dark cloak. "You will not touch her," Hiei spat, growling furiously.

The figure gave out a small string of laughter, it reminding him of a banshee or nails on a chalkboard. "My, my. Are you angry because I hurt your precious mate?"

"She's not my mate."

"Oh but she is precious to you. You've barely left her side since she came out of that arena. Why don't you just take her? She's not going to last much longer."

"You touch her and I will kill you."

"I already have her in my clutches Hiei. She is a corpse walking. Take my advice, make the most of your time with her. It won't be too long now."

Hiei snarled as Abhaya's body disappeared from his arms. He charged after the figure only to just hit air. "Better wake up Hiei. Maybe I'll take her while she sleeps."

Hiei's eyes snapped open, his legs instantly lengthening underneath him as he reached for his sword. His teeth were bared as his eyes settled on a small frame. Two doe blue eyes stared back at him in bewilderment, thick eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Hiei's eyes grew wide as he processed what he was seeing. "Hiei? What's… wrong?" Abhaya murmured tentatively.

Hiei's brow furrowed as he examined the small mage, checking her for any more damage that could have been inflicted upon her while he slept. He repressed a sigh and sheathed his sword. Prying his eyes from hers, he looked down at his sword as he looped it onto his belt. "You're awake," He said, ignoring her question.

"How perceptive of you," She deadpanned. "Why did you~"

"It's nothing."

Abhaya's furrowed her nose in irritation, the curves of her lips curling down. She turned to get up from the bed, only for her knees to buckle as soon as she tried to use her legs. Hiei caught her the moment she started to tumble, pressing the mage to his chest. "You need to rest~"

Abhaya cut him off just has he had done to her moments ago. "I have to pee."

Hiei blinked once and then twice. "Can't you hold it?"

"I've been asleep for god knows how long, what do you think?"

Hiei gave a small grunt of irritation, swooping the mage into his arms and carrying her to the nearest bathroom. He plopped her down onto the toilet and waited outside, frustrated with how he was acting. He wondered why he couldn't get her out of his mind, or why he ached for her touch or the feeling of her lips pressed firmly against his.

Hiei leaned against the wall, smacking the back of his head against it in irritation. He reimagined the way her lips had felt against his and the way her aura meshed with his during the ritual.

"Hiei."

Abhaya's soft voice cut through Hiei's thoughts, causing him to jump slightly. "What?"

"I can't stand…"

Hiei pressed his lips together and gently pressed the door open. Abhaya had pulled up her pants, but sat weakly on the toilet. Her eyes were pointed down towards the ground in shame as he came closer to her.

He placed her hands around his neck, lifting her up into his arms. Silence came between the two as Hiei started to walk back. "I'm sorry."

Hiei kept walking as she mumbled that against his chest, only for his brow to crease. "Why?" He said, keeping his eyes ahead.

"I'm weak. You keep helping me and I'm not sure why. Do you feel regret? Or are you pitying me?"

Hiei kept his face stoic as they walked past Abhaya's recovery room, earning a look of surprise from his mage. "What do you think?"

"I'm not sure, that's why I asked."

Hiei paused as he felt other demon's coming closer to them. He cursed under his breath, feeling Abhaya stare up at him innocently. He could not handle her self-torture and other demons at the same time. He pressed her head into his chest, causing the mage to stop breathing for a moment. "Stay quiet," He growled, feeling her nod against him.

Hiei sauntered past his lieutenants, feeling their eyes and hearing their jeers. He ground his teeth together, kicking himself for such a disgusting display towards the woman who was quivering in his arms. "Put me down. I can try to walk."

"Don't be a fool."

"I don't want your reputation to be ruined by me, Hiei. Let me struggle on my own."

Hiei wrinkled his nose, his brow furrowing as his lips became a firm line. "Didn't I tell you to be silent?"

Hiei watched behind a soft glare as Abhaya's eyes narrowed and she frowned. He slapped a hand over her mouth as she tried to speak, causing his mage to produce a growl of irritation. "Do I have to make you?" He said halfheartedly, his hand slipping from her lips and lingering on her chin a little too long.

Abhaya was oblivious, she stared at him with irritation and gave a small sigh of defeat. Hiei watched as she stared anywhere but at him as he gently kicked open the door to his room. Instantly, the tense fire demon started to relax in his own environment. He pushed the door closed with his foot and gently placed Abhaya on his nest like bed. She glared up at him with puckered lips, her arms folded over her chest. Suddenly, she sighed, averting her eyes to her hands in her lap. "Why are we here?"

"I can keep a better eye on you here."

Abhaya hunched her shoulders, her eye twitching as her stitches tightened over her shoulder blades. She felt so weak and defenseless. Hiei instantly smelled blood, his nose wrinkling in irritation. "You're bleeding again, woman."

Abhaya sat there emotionless, her eyes pointed down to the floor. Her lips were downturned into a pathetic frown. Hiei examined her, noticing how solemn she looked. He took some bandages from his pocket and sighed. "Turn around."

Abhaya's nose twitched slightly as her brow creased. She gently complied, turning her body as much as she could with her numb legs. Hiei watched her struggle, until he decided to pick her up and situate her to where he needed her to be. He unraveled the bandages around her two sutured wounds. Blood oozed from the worst of the two and slowly slid down the crook of her spine. It seemed that the stitches were still intact but the wound was just bleeding a bit. 'I over reacted,' Hiei thought with relief. 'I worry for her far too much.'

Hiei dabbed the blood away with a clean cloth, looking over the scars over her broad back. He drank in her intoxicating scent, wanting nothing more than to touch her. He refrained himself from running his hand over her spine, wondering silently if it would arch from his caress. 'What do I feel? Is this lust? Or am I really…' Hiei's mind trailed off as two bright blue eyes peered over her shoulder. "What's wrong? Did I pop a stitch?"

Hiei didn't like the way Abhaya's lower lip quivered or the thick dark circles underneath her bright eyes. "No. There's nothing wrong," He said, feeling his chest grow tight.

Abhaya nodded, averting her eyes away from him again. She pressed her eyes closed, wishing that she wasn't so weak and pathetic. "Are you hungry?"

Abhaya sighed, shaking her head. "You should eat something," He said stoically, standing up and towering over her.

He watched as a smile twitched over her lips. "You aren't going to bring me more of that disgusting fruit are you?"

Hiei scoffed, noticing that she was trying to joke with him. "I might, only to see you suffer through it."

"Arse."

"Hn."

Kurama sat in Genkai's tea room, sipping tea as he filled in his friends on the events that had taken place in the last few days. Kuwabara sat across from him, his balled up fists quivering over his knees. His brow was furrowed as he thought of how his friend had almost died. "So… she's recovering? Has she woken up yet?"

Kurama shook his head. "Not that I last heard, however that could have changed since I left. Her wounds were stable when I left and her fever was gone as well."

Genkai, who was sitting next to Kuwabara, nodded in relief. Yukina listened in the door way, concern evident on her face. "I'm not gonna lie…it sounds like she's lucky to be alive," Shizuru said, taking a long drag of her cigarette.

"I am just happy she is alive," Keiko added, hanging her head in worry.

"It must've been awesome when she turned herself into fire though. I mean…It's just a crazy idea. How did she even do it?" Kuwabara murmured.

"You'll have to ask her once she's back, Kuwabara."

"How long will that take?" Genkai grumbled.

"It's hard to say. She still needs to regain her strength and her wounds need to seal before she makes the journey back here."

"How are they treating her?" Yukina said, her eyes still filled to the brim with worry.

"For now, pressurized bandages and keeping her propped up while she sleeps. Elias has been feeding her liquids and making sure that she takes the medicine I made. Hiei hasn't really left her side either."

Genkai scoffed. "Big surprise there."

Yukina gave a small relieved smile. "That makes me feel better. She's going to need something to keep the graft from drying out though. I will make her something for it."

Kurama smiled warmly at the ice maiden. "I'm sure she be happy to except it."

Keiko stood, "I'll pack some of her clothes."

The remaining four sat around the naked kotatsu, silently waiting for someone to speak. Kurama cleared his throat, folding his hands in his lap. "It would seem that the opinions of Abhaya are starting to shift a little in Mukuro's Territory."

"How so? I thought demons had a very definite opinion of her."

"I thought so as well, but Mukuro threatened her people. She protecting Abhaya from the harm of those who oppose her. She even went so far as to help nurse her back to health."

"Why? I thought Mukuro wanted her dead," Kuwabara said.

"I am not sure as of right now, but I speculate that it has to do with Hiei's attachment to Abhaya."

"So it's come to her attention as well," Genkai said, lifting a long pipe to her lips and lighting it with a match.

"Indeed. Hiei has made his intentions obvious to Mukuro. Though, I don't believe he is close to fully showing it to Abhaya."

"Cheh. They're both idiots. She really is as oblivious as her father was."

"So it really is true… Hiei likes Abhaya-san?"

Both Kurama and Genkai nodded in unison. "He has only left her side for a few minutes since she had surgery."

"I am curious to see how they interact after all of this."

"Indeed. It has been interesting to see Hiei in such a state of disarray."

All three nodded in agreement.

Abhaya stared numbly at the ceiling, her back gently propped up with a small mountain of pillows. Gently she sighed, feeling her stitches tighten against her healing skin. Even though Hiei's bed was comfy, discomfort resonated throughout her whole body. She hated sitting still, left alone with just her thoughts. They always betrayed her, doing more harm than good. It felt like a boulder was tied to her chest, making it hard to breathe, hard to live. It was times like this when her depression was at its worst. It liked to eat at her when she was alone. "The spiral down the rabbit hole is slow and paved with jabs of self-loathing," She murmured pathetically.

Having thought that she was alone, Abhaya had spoken aloud. Mukuro stood in the doorway, watching the small mage with curious eyes. "How are you feeling?" Mukuro said, watching with amusement as Abhaya noticeably flinched.

"Okay."

Mukuro sat down on the chair beside Hiei's bed. "Do you always lie so blatantly about yourself?"

"It doesn't matter how I feel."

"Perhaps to you, but I did ask you in earnest how you are feeling."

Abhaya turned her head to look the demon in her eyes. "You honestly want the truth on how I feel right now?"

Mukuro tilted her head and narrowed her eyes slightly. "Of course."

"I hate laying here doing nothing but wallow. I hate that I can't move or working on something. I haven't sat still this long in years, it is not a feeling that I enjoy."
"Then why don't you get up."

"My legs won't work."

Mukuro stood with a small smirk lining her lips. "That sounds like a cop-out."

"You sound like Hiei."

"When you can stand, come find me," Mukuro said with a small laugh.

Abhaya pushed herself up to watch Mukuro go. Mukuro stopped in the doorway to say one last thing. "Unless you don't feel like you can ever stand again."

Abhaya glared at her as she closed the door, grinding her teeth together. 'She's fecking mocking me! What the bloody hell!?'

Abhaya growled, resisting the urge to flip the demon off. She rested her head on the mountain of pillows on her back, glaring at the ceiling once more. She was uncomfortable in that large room, yet the fact that it smelled of Hiei gave her some comfort. 'I don't understand him… I thought he hated me. He should. I'm nothing but a bloody nuisance.'

Abhaya's frown twitched into a small smile. Despite all that had transpired, she could not bring herself to fully mistrust him. A small sharp knock jolted Abhaya, causing her to jump a little in Hiei's bed. She pushed herself up on her forearms and stared at the door. "Yes?"

"May I come in?"

Abhaya's nervousness skyrocketed as she realized who was at the door. "Go ahead."

Kirin slowly opened the door, having to slightly duck under the small frame. 'Is this a high traffic area or something? Or do I just attract them?' She thought, feeling a lump form in her throat. "How are you feeling?" He asked, catching the small mage off guard.

"I've been better."

He gave a nod, his eyes never leaving her as she pressed herself deeper into the mountain of pillows. She searched his form for injuries, noticing that he had fully healed in the days she had slept. A scoff rolled from the depths of her throat. 'Jesus, he even healed faster than me.'

"Why didn't you finish me?"

Abhaya sighed, her hooded eyes drooping from fatigue and irritation. "I told you, I don't kill anymore. Unless it is to protect."

"But you were protecting yourself."

Abhaya shook her head in protest. "I am not important."

"I thought mages had more pride."

"I have pride but not when it comes to myself."

"Then who?"

"My son," She smiled fondly. "I am very proud of him."

Kirin's eyes narrowed at her, his lips curling slightly from behind his mask. "You mean that Pup?"

"Yes. I would be dead if not for him."

"He's saved your life?"

"Every day he saves my life."

"Are you in that much peril?"

Abhaya chuckled, "From myself, yes."

Kirin's eyes grew wide as he realized exactly what she meant. "You wish you~" He trailed off.

"I am already dead. But I live because I made a promise that I want to keep. If I had been given the chance, I would have taken my life years ago. However, we are past that point. I have a son to raise and people to heal."

"You are no warrior then."

Abhaya smiled. "No, I'm not."

Silence came over the two, hanging thickly in the air. A chuckle rolled out from Kirin's chest, overwhelming him to the point where he threw his head back and grinned. Abhaya watched him, confused by his action. "How bizarre."

"What do you mean?" Abhaya said, tilting her head to the side.

Kirin sobered up, stepping closer to her until he towered over her relaxed form. "Hiei has a claim upon you, does he not? It's amusing that he would want a women like you who has no intent to kill any longer."

Abhaya frowned, not understanding what he meant. "A claim? I don't understand."

"You don't know that he is courting you?"

Abhaya's brow furrowed even further. "Hiei doesn't like me like that."

"Are you so certain? After all, he is taking care to see that you heal properly."

Abhaya shook her head in disbelief. "He finds me disgusting and he should. Besides, he needs a strong demon to court, not an unstable mage who can't even control her own emotions. I am a nuisance to him, nothing worth fighting for."

Kirin scoffed. "Then what are you to him?"

Abhaya shook her head and shrugged uncomfortably. "I don't know…A friend? A comrade? We haven't talked about that. Why are you asking about this?"

"His name is being slandered by your presence. I suggest you make your own intentions clear before he is exiled because of you."

"Why would Hiei be exiled?"

"He is siding with you. He is seen as a traitor to his own people."

Abhaya let his words sink in, wishing that she could just crawl into herself and disappear. She pressed her lips together, her shoulders hunching in hopelessness. "I understand."

Kirin straightened himself, watching the mage before him. "It's better that you do, for both your sakes."

A/N: Well hello there! I am sorry this took me so long. These last few months have been very crazy and to be honest, this wasn't my favorite chapter to write. But it was necessary. I am not going to do the segment this time around because I only got one question (thank you Backoff22). I'll just answer your question below for today.

So, Abhaya is only twenty. She is a fetus compared to the other mages (I'll get more into that when the time comes). She spent from birth till she was 8 in Scotland and then left after her sister practically threw her out. She then moved to England near the Isle of Wight (Which I will also talk about in later chapters.) She lived there with Elias for seven years, so till she was about fourteen/fifteen. That was when they moved to Japan. The cabin is in Hokkaido (The northern island) near a small village. They've only lived there for five years. I hope that explained a bit. Thank you for commenting so often and I am happy to hear that you plan to reread this fanfiction.

Thank you to all who have been reading this fanfiction. I am glad that you all have taken such a fancy to it. Please be sure to review/ follow/ favorite if you did enjoy it. I love hearing what you all think. If you have a question that you're dying for me to answer than please be sure to leave it. If I get more questions I will do the segment at the end. Thank you again and have a wonderful evening. ~Ela