In which a hysterical moment might just actually be a good thing.

oooOOOooo

Warrior

You want a textbook definition for "stupid"? Just look at Venemo and Nahaher and you'll get it. They were merely lumbering fools, nothing more. Heck, they didn't even have magical powers. Unfortunately however, their sheer size seemed to be a perfect compensator for the lack of brains. Cleo's first encounter with these guys involved her, Tut and Luxor chasing after a frozen mammoth drifting in an Underworld river to a Neverending Waterfall (yeah, it's a long story, and as always, it was the fault of Tutenstein). Back then the pharaoh was basically trashed by the demons and it was only due to his quick thinking that they escaped: he turned the two brothers on each other which earned them enough time to retrieve the knocked-aside Scepter of Was and open a portal big enough to transport themselves and the mammoth back to the museum. Even still, they barely made it, Nahaher almost caught them.

Cleo had thought that they were merely unlucky that day, that's why Tut could not pull off some tricky light show magic that would have sent the demons spiraling over the edge of the hovering cliffs of the Underworld.

She hated to realize how wrong she was.

The immense size of their bodies meant a ridiculous amount of defense. Even that first fire ball from Ra was more like a surprise than actual damage. With two giant slaps on his own shoulder, Venemo had put out the small fires in his fur and turned to the much small sun god.

- Bug! – he bellowed.

- Shiny bug – grunted Nahaher in agreement.

This obviously pissed Ra off whose crown shone brighter and spat embers. Bastet and Tut quickly arrived to the scene and the three of them began unleashing an array of magical beams and orbs, bombarding the demons with them. With a deafening roar the monsters retaliated and charged straight at their attackers. Ra dodged to the right, while Bastet dragged the slow Tut out of the way to the left. Nahaher skidded to a halt, while his even more dimwitted brother zoomed by, literally turned around on his heels and slammed his giant palm down, aiming at the sun god. Ra staggered back but the surprising maneuver was too fast and the next second he found himself lying on his stomach with an unbearably huge weight crushing him into the pavement. His battle Ankh skidded far away and he himself had to struggle to somehow withstand the force, at least for a time.

- Ra! – cried out Bastet and tried to jump there, Tut still held in her arms, but a huge green-furred foot appeared out of nowhere.

Venemo tried to kick them away like a football but he could not compete with the agility of a cat. Bastet twisted her whole body across the air, masterfully avoiding the giant limb, then landed on her feet and with a loud hiss snatched her knives out of her belt while Tut raised his staff. Venemo stood between them and his brother holding the sun god captive.

The body of a god is very durable, it can withstand far worse things than a human physique, especially at full health. However, it does have its own limits and Ra felt like he was about to cross that limit. Nahaher noticed his foe struggling against his strength so he shifted his weight and put as much of it onto his arm as possible. This made the sun god gasp from pain. He would rather have emitted a bird-screech but his body was already in too much strain and he couldn't muster the strength. His arms providing the counterforce to the demon's shook but held. In the meantime Ra began to raise his own body heat as fast as he possibly could under these conditions. It has been a while since he last used this tactic, but it did work against Apep once.

Nahaher was distracted by Venemo's struggle with the cat goddess and the pharaoh (furry small bug and even smaller bug). Bastet was admittedly not the best at ranged battles, her magical projectiles were rather underwhelming. So she decided to turn the monster's size against him and began scaling the huge thing, elegantly avoiding the hands grabbing after her, using every opportunity to plunge her daggers into the essence. Tutenstein was the diversion in this case. He ran around, firing lasers from his Scepter, shouting insults and generally being the annoying little punk he usually was. However, Chaos also had something to say in the matter as most beams simply missed their target. Tut had always been a good marksman, there was no denying that. The fact that he missed something so huge so often could only mean that Isfet returned to its "spell-altering" tactics from earlier.

It took a while for Nahaher's miniscule brain to finally get the memo that something was burning a hole into his palm. With an earsplitting roar he snatched his hand away, revealing a blazing and quite dazed Ra, half-crushed into the asphalt. The sun god shook his head and tried to catch his breath.

Just a second, he thought to himself as he fought for total control over his body once more.

Unfortunately a second for his clouded mind was a minute in real time, long enough for Nahaher to gather himself together and decide to exact his revenge on the shiny (and really hot) bug.

- ME SQUISH YOU! – he bellowed and lifted his foot up.

By that time, Ra had barely begun to drag himself away. His body heat started to melt the asphalt around him, slowly turning it into a lake of tar that stuck to him and further hindered his already sluggish movements.

And if there was one thing Nahaher and Venemo were good at, it was stepping on things. Only this time, a huge bang and a ray of light knocked the leg aside and also shot through it at the ankle. Nahaher reared back, almost fell over, roaring from pain. Ra, struggling in his self-made prison, noted with a gradually clearing mind that the blast did NOT come from him. With some difficulty he raised his head, only to meet a most peculiar scene. Not far from them, the mortal girl Cleo Carter was standing with shaky legs, holding up the smoking battle Ankh of the sun god, its end aimed right at the giant demon.

- You stay away from them! – shrieked the girl, voice distorted and high-pitched.

oooOOOooo

What was good about Egyptian magic? A great many things, truly.

Egyptian magic is actually pretty easy to call upon, all you need is the smallest of affinity for it. Of course closed-minded tunnel-visioned idiots like Dr. Horace Bedhety would never be able to cast a spell, no matter how many they would chant. But Cleo Carter? She was a natural. Although still quite inexperienced, she always managed to find unconsciously the power within every magical item and set it free. From scrolls to amulets and even the Scepter of Was, she could always get at least some magic out of them. It may have been due to her great interest and knowledge of Egyptian mythology, or maybe to some gift she was born with.

Regardless of the answer, once Cleo saw Ra pinned down by Nahaher, she panicked.

- Luxor, Gramps, stay with Thoth! – she shouted and without a backward glance leaped out from behind the remains of the wall and dashed right in the middle of the battlefield.

She had no idea what she could do, all she knew was that she had to help somehow! Maybe she could get Nahaher's attention, or… or…

She saw the Ankh of the sun god lying on the road. The golden symbol of Life was made to banish the demons and monsters and it could even hurt Apep, the Serpent of Chaos itself. Cleo grabbed it and, with some difficulty, lifted it up. It must have been made of pure gold. Still struggling with it, she looked at Nahaher who was distracted by Venemo's battle with Tut and Bastet. The demon's hand began smoking all of a sudden, but he only reacted after a couple of seconds, snatching it away with a howl. Cleo expected Ra to spring to his feet and began bombarding the monster with fire balls once more and she almost let out a relieved sigh. What she saw instead made her blood freeze. The sun god was basically flattened into the road, his blazing body melting the asphalt around him which in return got stuck to him, effectively trapping him. He was also completely dazed, unable to get out of the way in time.

Roaring in fury, Nahaher raised his foot to squish Ra. There was no way the sun god would survive that in this condition. With a defiant shout, Cleo raised the suddenly feather-light Ankh and let her emotions do the rest.

Another interesting thing about Egyptian magic was that most of its artifacts were almost or most definitely self-aware. The Scepter of Was surely had a mind of its own for instance, and most other weapons did as well. Shabtis worked this way too: they were little sculptures with dormant consciousness, only activated with the right spell. Some relics needed to be talked to, others wanted you to prove your worth to them before lending their power to you, and others merely reacted to your state of mind. Ra's Ankh fell into the latter category: it used emotions to cast spells, and it was no secret why. Ra was a temperamental one, not only because he was a fire god basically, but also because back in the really old days, when only he, Thoth, Atum and Apep were alive from the pantheon, Ra had another task next to being the sun god: he represented the emotional side of humanity, the raw potential of their willpower. His immense strength came from his unwavering sense of duty, his persistence, his emotions. The stronger the feeling, the better. It was no surprise then that his weapon of choice reflected this.

All feelings held different level of potential. Indifference was the bottom of everything, while blazing rage or unconditional love were like ten nuclear bombs launched straight at your face. Upon seeing Nahaher attack, Cleo involuntarily poured everything into the Ankh, charging it up with power. She was scared beyond belief, for her family, for her friends, for the world, for herself; desperate that the world was on the verge of complete destruction and there was nothing she could do to help; enraged at Seth, at Chaos, at the demons, at her own weakness; yet determined to do everything, possible and impossible, to somehow win this war, to survive, to make sure her beloved ones and the world live on…

The best thing about emotions was that gods and mortals had it the same. Their love and hate, joy and sadness, hopes and fears were equal. Thus, as Cleo charged up the Ankh and let loose a devastating beam of magic at Nahaher, it had the same power as if it had been launched by Ra himself in the same state of mind. The attack tore right through the ankle of the demon, making him rear back in pain.

- You stay away from them! – screamed Cleo from the top of her lungs, on the verge of total hysteria due to the sudden rush of adrenalin (which only raised the Ankh's powers). – You will not hurt anybody else ever again!

Nahaher sneered, showing his horrible fangs. He stomped with his feet but forgot about his injury, thus his blasted leg gave in under the weight and he fell to one knee with a loud thud. Ra somehow dragged himself out of the instant tar lake and quickly scrambled into a safe distance, bits of asphalt still clung to his skin.

The demon swung his arm at Cleo but he was too slow.

- I SAID BEGONE! - she shouted and fired another beam from the Ankh.

This time she hit the face of the monster dead on, causing him to burst into desert sand and scatter to the wind.

Cleo let the Ankh fell down and tug at her arms again as she exhaled loudly.

oooOOOooo

To call Ra "old" was the understatement of the year. He wasn't old, he was ancient. The member of the Original Four, Father of Gods, First Pharaoh of Egypt, Ruler of the Golden Age, Lord of the Sun, Vanquisher of Chaos, The Brilliant One, He Who Brings Light, He Who Sees All…

Well, for the life of him, he could not recall seeing something like this before: a mortal girl wielding his weapon, killing one of the largest demons ever to live with it. Of course Nahaher was not erased completely, his remains would return to the River of Night to reform once more after a century or so, just like every dead demons did. Still, it was a most impressive achievement, one that not even the stern God of the Sun could deny. He slowly pushed himself up from the ground and walked up to the girl who was breathing loudly, holding onto the Ankh with some difficulty, knees slightly buckled under the weight.

- That was… - he began, but Cleo visibly flinched and snapped her head in his direction.

- Oh I'm so sorry, Your Majesty! – she stammered and tried to lift up the Ankh again. – I did not mean to defile your weapon—I mean, symbol—I mean—

Ra shushed her with a tired wave of his hand.

- Relax, girl, you did well – he said, before turning his attention to the other big fight on the field.

Venemo didn't get the memo that his brother just died, probably because he was busy with a dagger stuck in one of his eyes. He was roaring loudly, desert sand pouring from the wound. He shook his entire body madly, trying to get rid of a very persistent Bastet clinging to his fur. The goddess tried to stab her other dagger into the neck, but being thrown around so madly, she had little success in it. Tut was also getting really frustrated for not being able to hit his obvious target.

For a long second, Ra merely followed the epic battle with great interest, making Cleo hold her breath back (for what, she could not tell). Then the god's bright green eyes flashed back to her.

- Would you do the honors, Cleo Carter? – he theatrically gestured to the demon's trashing form, a small smile appearing on his beak.

As expected, the mortal girl froze up again from sheer surprise.

- Wha—Who—me? Me? – she stammered.

- Cleo Carter, Vanquisher of Demons. Sounds good, no? – Ra went on, gathering energy into his hands to finish the fight for good.

-… Y—yeah, I guess it do—does – Cleo looked back at Venemo uncertainly.

Then she scowled darkly and once again raised the charged Ankh without any difficulty, aiming it at the monster.

Ra was not really a god interested in humans all that much. He had been a king since time began and even after he lost his throne to the treacherous Isis (and the even more treacherous Thoth, while we're at it…), he still retained his high position and the general respect that surrounded him. He never truly had to deal with mortals, to be frank. He sailed the Boat of Millions of Years down the River of Night to bring in the new day every dawn, his crown shared its warmth and light with the world, enabled life to flourish, but he himself had always been a distant god, even if he was the embodiment of emotions and willpower. Thoth also had been distant, he however taught the humans to write and to learn, to ask the right questions, so eventually he grew closer to them. Ra had no such business with the mortals. Therefore, their achievements more often than not sailed right over his head, he could not really care less about them.

But besides all this, Ra was a warrior, and he admired strength, bravery, even recklessness if it had any merit. In the many wars he had witnessed over the eons, he saw many soldiers and military leaders come up with incredibly stupid and/or reckless tactics, to save comrades, to win a battle, to surprise the hell out of their opponents. He liked those, he might have even learnt from them, had his daily battles were the same as those of the mortals (alas, they weren't). He also remunerated the efforts of those who faced their fears and desperation and went into battle anyway, even if they fell in the end. Therefore, Cleo Carter's reckless charge right into the middle of the battlefield and effective sweeping with magic did not leave the usually stoic god without impression.

The girl was a brave one. Maybe a bit crazy, too. But honestly, spending so much time with a pharaoh, being his baby-sitter basically… Ra could understand it, if that was truly the case. Also, it was well-due time that the sun god did something out of the ordinary, just for the heck of it. Why not charge into battle alongside a 15 year-old mortal girl?

Yeah, he could do that.

With a clear and proud bird-screech and blazing hands, Ra launched himself at the demon, while Cleo began circling around, trying to find the right spot from which she could fire the beams.

- Cleo! What are you doing here? – shouted Tut when the two of them met. – Didn't Bastet tell you to—?

- Yeah, change in plans! – Cleo interrupted, swinging the way-too-large Ankh, trying to find the best hold on it. – How about we just kill this guy now?

- Alright, I'm in! – the pharaoh laughed and together they let loose their destructive array of blasts.

Venemo stood no chance against the overwhelming force and was quickly reduced to a big heap of sand, with Gramps and Luxor cheering from the background. The four warriors, two gods, one mortal, one undead stood above the small hill, panting hard but victoriously.

- Thank Atum it is over – huffed Bastet. – I thought they would never die!

- We all did well – Ra smiled slightly. – Now let us—

A horrible, all-consuming, omnipotent roar suddenly erupted from everywhere, shaking the world itself, forcing everyone, mortal or immortal, onto the ground, clutching their heads, shouting for mercy.