Chapter 37
I don't own Lucian
You guys... These reviews are crazy! Thank you so much! And everyone hates me from the last chapter... will you love me again soon? Over 60 reviews on the last chapter again.
Lucy's POV
Since I had glanced at Ian's call sheet the day prior I knew when his call time today is. I make sure to get up much earlier than he probably will, granting me the time to get around for the morning without having to face him. After last night I am not ready to. I'm terrified he will just confirm with words what I have already figured out on my own last night. His actions are heart breaking enough, if I were to hear him actually verbalize the words than I don't know what I would do. I'd shatter, that's much I know for sure.
I have already gotten dressed in a simple pair of denim shorts and a random shirt I grabbed out of the closet in my rush to limit the amount of time I was in the bedroom. Brea is in one of her adorable floral onesies with black socks on her feet to keep her little toes warm.
Brea and I are already in my car driving through Los Angeles before eight in the morning. I know exactly where I'm going. I'm too numb to think about where I am headed. My body knows the drive well; I don't even have to think about which directions to take. By the time I arrive to my desired location it is just shy of nine. Though traffic was heavy, it wasn't too terrible of a commute. Parking the car I unbuckle Brea's car seat and lift it out of the car in my left hand with my purse and her diaper bag in my right.
"Come on baby girl, we've got someone to see." I say softly prior to noticing the long car ride has made her drift back to sleep.
I walk into the sky high building, my flats making a faint tapping sound as I make my way across the marble floor to the elevator. Once inside I press the button for the third floor from the top. The little ding signifying my floor comes far too slow for my liking leaving me to stand silently in the elevator alone to dwell over my own thoughts. When it finally does ring softly and the doors open I walk a mere five feet from the elevator to the door of my destination. Taking a deep breath I lift my hand up to knock softly on the door.
"Hey, what are you doing here?" A surprised Troian asks.
"Can I come in?" I reply softly, barely even above a whisper.
"Of course! Is everything alright?" Troian steps back and opens the door wider for me to enter her shared apartment with Patrick. Even after they had gotten married they opted for remaining in their apartment since they didn't need the extra amount of space a house offers just yet.
I shake my head and struggle to keep the tears at bay. "No, no nothing is okay actually."
"Goose what happened?" Troian takes Brea's car seat from my hand to sit it down on the ground and pulls me into a tight hug. I cling onto her and let the tears fall. Loud sobs rake through my body.
"He doesn't want me anymore Troian! He came home from work and I had made us dinner. He loved it, everything was going perfectly and then…" I drift off recalling the events from the previous night.
"And then what? What happened?"
I try to clear my throat and wipe my tears but it is simply no use. "I sat down on his lap and we started kissing. I thought he was really getting into it. I know I was. But as soon as my hand slid down to try and pull his shirt off, he recoiled."
"What? Are you sure he recoiled? I mean this is Ian we are talking about." Troian looks at me in disbelief.
"He recoiled Troian! He fucking recoiled from me. He brushed me aside like some clingy teenager or something! He pushed me off of his lap and jumped up so quickly he was literally stumbling to get away from me." I shout with tears streaming down my cheeks.
Troian's face is covered in shock and she is stunned for a minute. We are broken from our intense gaze when Brea's shrill cries sound in the apartment. I sigh in frustration.
Squatting down to Brea's car seat I unbuckle the straps restraining her squirming body. "I'm sorry baby girl. Mommy didn't mean to yell."
I cradle Brea against my chest patting her back soothingly with a soft bounce to my sway. It only takes about half a second until she is calmed and snuggling into my chest. I press a lingering kiss to the side of her head and close my eyes.
"Why don't we go sit down?" Troian offers after watching the scene in front of her for a moment. I nod my head briefly and sniffle back my emotions. When I'm upset Brea always picks up on it.
She carries Brea's car seat for me into the open living room with floor to ceiling windows that look out on all of LA. You can even see the ocean from their apartment. The view is truly spectacular. I take a seat on the plush white couch with Troian instantly taking a seat next to me.
"Is Patrick here?" I wonder aloud whilst my eyes roam the quiet apartment.
"No," she shakes her head in denial. "He actually left just before you got here. Today is his last day at the show he is guest starring on and they needed him bright and early today."
"What do I do Troian? When Ian pushed me away last night I tried to talk to him about it because I can't let it go any longer but he just made up another excuse and ran up the stairs." I glance down at Brea in my lap in order to avoid her gaze. "Am I just not enough for him?"
"Lucy you know that isn't true. Ian loves you so, so much!" She reaches her hand out to clasp it over mine. "I know he's acting weird but maybe it's just something wrong with him. You two need to just sit down and talk without any temptations."
I reluctantly nod my head. "I know, I just am afraid of what he's going to say whenever we do finally talk."
"I'm sure it will turn out just fine. You know you are more than welcome to hang out here if you need to or if you just want some time to breathe and think everything over."
"Thank you Troian, you're the best!" I lean over to hug her, well hug her as best as I can with Brea in my lap.
"Now let me see my little niece!" Troian takes Brea from me eagerly.
Brea and I spend the entire day at Troian's just hanging out and enjoying the time together. We ended up getting hungry around seven so we found ourselves in the kitchen cooking up whatever we could find. We are digging into the delicious meal when Patrick walks through the front door. He smiles politely and greets me upon seeing me sitting at the table.
"How's your day been, honey?" Patrick asks coming over to kiss Troian.
"It was good, Lucy spent the day here so we got to have some girl time and I got to play with my little niece over there." Troian nods her head over to Brea lying happily on her blanket with her toys around her that I had made sure to put in her bag this morning.
Patrick walks over to Brea, smiles brightly and waves at her. He is coming around to the whole baby thing so he's been trying to become less awkward around babies and is using Brea to do so. However, the second Brea's bright blue eyes land on him standing above her she starts crying. Her cries turn into ear splitting shrills and I hop up from the table.
"I didn't do it!" He puts his hands up and backs away from Brea causing Troian and I to giggle. "See, I told you Troian. She doesn't like me!"
"It isn't that she doesn't like you babe, she simply doesn't know you all that much." Troian tries to explain after suppressing her giggles.
"I'm sorry Lucy," he apologizes when I lean down to pick her up.
"Don't worry about it, Patrick. You didn't do anything. Once she is more acquainted with you she will want you to be the one to hold her and play with her."
He gives me a weary look. "If you say so."
After calming Brea back down and return her to her gleeful state I sit her back down on her blanket and return to the table where Patrick has joined us. The three of us enjoy eating together and carry on light conversation. I offer to clean up dinner but they both deny the offer. Patrick says he'll do it and sends us off to the living room where we turn on whatever random movie we stumble across on TV while lounging on the couch. Brea is getting tired because I have her stretched out along my torso and her eyes keep drooping. My fingers trace her tiny spine continuously which is also lulling her to sleep.
I feel my phone vibrate in my back pocket. Carefully, I shift on the couch to pull the phone out of my pocket and glance at the screen. I frown when I see Ian's name light up across the screen. I ignore the call and tuck it back in my pocket not missing Troian's glance over at me when I do so.
A few minutes later I notice Patrick, who is sitting in the leather arm chair adjacent to me, pulls out his phone when it starts ringing. He glances at the screen then over to me, then back to the screen again. I furrow my brow for a minute at his action.
"Hey Ian." Patrick greets into the phone and I instantly freeze in place.
"Yeah, she's right here actually."
My lips draw into a straight line when he gets up to bring me the phone. "Ian wants to talk to you. He said he couldn't get ahold of you and wasn't sure where you were."
I don't make any move to take the phone from his hand. Troian nudges me and indicates for me to take it. I scowl back at her and purse my lips. Reluctantly I take the phone from a very confused Patrick.
"Yes?"
"Where are you?" Ian's smooth voice asks through the phone. God just hearing his voice shifts my emotions.
"At Troian and Patrick's apartment clearly. What do you need?" I respond shortly. He didn't want to talk to me last night and I don't want to talk to him now.
"When will you be home? It's already eleven; I've been waiting for you."
"I don't know. It's not like you want anything to do with me right now so I don't see why you're waiting." I can't help but having bitterness to my tone.
"Lucy—"
I cut him off not wanting to hear what he has to say. "I have to go. Goodbye Ian."
I hand up the phone and hand it back to Patrick who looks at me completely confused. He shifts his gaze over to Troian who subtly shakes her head as if telling him not to ask. Patrick puts the phone back in his pocket and returns to his chair.
By the time the movie has ended it is just after midnight. Troian offers for me to stay in the guest room since she knows I have no desire to go home right now. I ponder the option for a minute before agreeing to take her up on it.
I change Brea's diaper before I rearrange the pillows on the bed. Since I don't have anything for Brea to sleep in I safely lay her down on the center of the bed up at the top. She is already asleep when I place her on the bed. I've never slept with her in the bed before. All these thoughts and worries race through my mind about what could happen. I know some parents share a bed with their babies but I am extremely hesitant about it.
With Brea all situated in bed I lie down on my side and watch her. I decide to stay up to ensure nothing happens overnight. I'm used to pulling all-nighters so it should be just fine. Hopefully.
"Lucy," a soft voice murmurs from behind me as a hand gently shakes my arm.
I jump up, startled by the person and the fact I had fallen asleep. I frantically look down at Brea who is fast asleep two feet away from me. A huge sigh of relief washes over me when I see she is okay. How did I fall asleep? I remember looking at the clock at three am and I remained awake after Brea's late night feeding.
"Lucy?" The voice calls again.
I shake my head of my thoughts and glance over to where the voice is coming from. My eyes land on Troian who is standing next to the bed with a sympathetic look.
"Uh sorry. I was just startled." I clear my throat and rub the tiredness out of my eyes. "What's up?"
"Sorry for waking you but I figured it was best I be the one to do it. Ian's here. He says he wants to talk to you."
"Well I don't want to talk to him right now so he's out of luck." I shrug simply and turn to lay back down on the bed.
Troian hesitates before speaking up. "He won't leave, I already tried to get him to when he was at the door."
I groan disgruntled. Knowing Ian, he won't leave until we talk. I ask Troian to stay in here and keep an eye on Brea as I step out into the living room to find Ian looking out the wall of windows.
"You have no reason to come here." I cross my arms over my chest and glare at him.
Ian jumps at the sound of my voice and instantly turns to focus on me. "Lucy," he smiles brightly at me and moves to shuffle closer to me. "We need to talk."
"Don't. I tried talking last night and you ran upstairs after lying to me, do you remember that? I don't want to talk right now so just go."
Ian tries to redeem his actions of last night but I simply tell him now is not the time, not here.
"You have to be at work in half an hour that isn't near the amount of time we need for talking." Turning on my heel I walk across the apartment with the intention of returning to the guest room.
"Lucy come on!"
I don't even bother turning around to voice my reply to him. "I said no Ian, now go to work."
Entering the bedroom I ask Troian if she'll make sure he actually leaves. She does as I asked and left me alone with Brea. I lie down on my back starring up at the ceiling for a few minutes debating how I am going to face this. We need to talk but on my terms. He doesn't get to decide after constantly finding reasons to ignore me.
After much debate I decide to talk to him today when he has a break between filming. If I remember his call sheet correctly, he has a chunk of free time today. The only problem is I cannot remember when it is exactly. Troian returns to the room shortly after exiting to tell me Ian has left. I thank her for letting me spend the night and for always being there for me.
I gather my stuff while Troian has to bid her goodbyes to Brea. Troian walks me down to my car, giving me a hug before I leave and making me promise to keep her updated on what happens. She also offers up her guest room for whenever I need it.
Yet again I find myself parking in the WB parking lot with Brea's car seat on my arm headed to Ian's trailer. After leaving Troian's I had driven back to the house to change into a fresh pair of clothes for myself as well as for Brea. Climbing up the steps to the trailer I open the door and enter the trailer. I lay a blanket down for Brea to play with her while I wait for Ian to return to his trailer on break.
Hours have passed and still no Ian. It's time for Brea's afternoon feeding and nap. After I feed her I burp her, change her diaper, and take her back to where her basinet has stayed for situations like this. I turn on some soft music for her on my iPad and sit it down on the bed next to her basinet to help drown out the sound of the people walking through the trailers. Pressing a kiss to her forehead I step away from her basinet and return to the couch.
I'm sitting on the couch engrossed in my phone when the door to the trailer opens. Taking a deep breath I lift my head up ready to face Ian only to come face to face with a crew member, Ari to be specific.
"Oh hi Lucy! Sorry I just needed to drop off Ian's call sheet for next week since I didn't catch him before he left the set just now. Is he here yet?" Ari glances over to the little nook for the bedroom where she hears the music softly playing.
"Hi Ari. No he isn't here yet. Actually, he doesn't even know I'm here. I had laid Brea down for her nap; she likes soft music as she sleeps sometimes." I explain the noise to her.
"Oh I'm sorry," she lowers her voice. "Here is his call sheet. If I see him I'll let him know you're here. It was great seeing you again." Ari hands me the paper with a faint smile and leaves quietly.
My eyes roam over the call sheet interested in his call times for next week. I place the paper down on the couch then turn my attention back to my phone. It isn't long until the trailer door opens once more.
This time it is Ian.
"What are you doing here?" Ian asks taken back by my presence.
I push up from the couch to stand on my feet bringing me closer to his height. Taking a deep breath I look him in the eye.
"We need to talk."
It seems some of you guys are losing your minds not knowing what is going on with Ian! The ideas have been very interesting and I have enjoyed seeing what you all are coming up with! So, do you think they will finally talk this time? Thoughts on Lucy being the one to push Ian away this time?
All of your reviews are amazing. I am still taken back by how many there are. I cannot thank you all enough. We're slowly creeping closer to the end of the story; I can't believe it!
Any more thoughts and ideas you guys have? I've loved reading what you've come up with so far!
If it gets to 1,200 reviews I will update on Wednesday. If it exceeds that, then I will post on Tuesday! :)