Eli: Men are a strange breed, they get embarrassed by the silliest things.

Phoenix: I'll have to watch that... is Wicked a movie? I'm guessing?

Viskii: No, Ed knows Roy is going alone. They discussed it together some chapters way back.

anmb: I get crab? Yay! But yes... I think only Havoc could handle having his session on the toilet presided over by Riza.

.bunny: Ooops, do I do that? -tries to appear innocent- Thank you, I'm really very glad to hear you like my stories. I really am.

Anime-Luver: Dignity sometimes does have to take a back burner.

Night-Childe: I guess I should start providing tissues for tears of laughter.

SecretSnow: I see you feel pity for Havoc.

GreedxEd: I am still planning on trying to get that idea incorporated somewhere, yeah.

Paon: I'm on copy and paste status? Hehe... as long as it's a good thing.

Lamia: Write yourself a schedule? So you have this many hours to do homework, this many to read, and so on.

Shikon: I just do... not really an easy way to kill a scorpion. It implies work.

Well, I'm back. I was gone for how many days? Three I think... since Sunday I believe. I was having a really bad day on Sunday, and only today am I starting to feel better about things. I was at the point though on Sunday where I didn't want to even look at my fics, much less do anything with them. I knew if I did I'd probably end up deleting things... and that wouldn't have been good. So I took some mental time off to gather myself back into something resembling control and confidence. I'm back now though, I'm feeling better about everything.

I hope you all enjoy.

Chapter Thirty Seven

It was barely dawn when Roy stumbled out of his bed and to the shower. Stifling a wide yawn behind one hand he set about getting ready for the day. Next to his closet door a small suitcase stood already packed and ready for his departure. He gave it a brief glance as he combed his hair while walking around his bedroom to be sure he hadn't forgotten to pack anything that he might need. He knew he wouldn't need much, he didn't plan to stay for very long, but it was an internal mental fear of all humans that they would forget something essential before leaving on a trip, no matter how short. Sure, he wasn't exactly a human, but he had enough of a human mind left to him that he still fell prey to the psychological tricks of the human conscious.

Deciding that he had in fact packed accordingly with everything he'd need, Roy slipped the comb down into a side pocket for safe keeping. He would need it later.

Walking over to the side table next to his bed which was still mussed from his sleep, Roy picked up his gloves and pulled them on one by one taking extra care that they were as pristine white as always and were fitting correctly along his fingers. Snapping wasn't so quick if bunches of fabric got in your way. In fact it rather made one feel a bit foolish. Turning away he walked over to the suitcase again and picked it up smoothly before heading out of his bedroom.

He took the short flight of stairs in pairs, and reached the landing where he set the suitcase down to the floor. Leaving it there for the moment he went into his kitchen to start brewing a cup of morning coffee. He'd gone to the market last night with Edward before they'd both gone their separate ways home, so he'd restocked on his supplies. Pulling out several slices of bread he set them on a plate while turning to find some butter. He gave a light snap of his fingers as he did so, instantly crisping them to a perfect golden brown color. Butter was spread onto them in a thin smear, he couldn't stand the taste of too much butter anymore. It was like eating oil if there was too much, and he didn't have a particular inclination to eat a lot of oil. No matter what kind it was.

Taking a bite out of one of the slices Roy wandered from his kitchen and back out to the sitting room where he stood for a moment looking out the window where the curtains had been thrown open.

The snow was falling again on a world recently just cleared by the hard work of children being given snow shovels by their parents. The yards were piling up with the stuff now, and Roy suspected that once the roads and sidewalks were cleared again by free child labor that the houses and shops would be encased in snow. Which was actually not a bad thing. The snow provided insulation, and would help keep everything warmer inside. Idly Roy wondered who had bothered clearing his own sidewalk and path, he didn't exactly have neighbors. He supposed though that should he find out he should thank them, it certainly had made his own time of it easier.

The coffee maker in the kitchen gave a loud beep that could be heard clearly by Roy. He'd actually transmuted the coffee maker to give it some soundproof qualities so the noise wouldn't be so loud to his sensitive ears. He thought though that perhaps he might make it even quieter. Which would surely drive Edward crazy once all of Roy's appliances were so quiet that only the latter could hear them. But Roy could handle informing Edward of things every time in order to preserve his hearing and keep himself from getting a migraine. There were just priorities sometimes.

Roy finished his current slice of toast and wandered back towards the kitchen while brushing the crumbs fastidiously off his gloves to make them immaculate once again. The aroma of coffee was a heavenly scent, now that he had grown used to it again. It no longer overwhelmed him and made him feel slightly nauseous. His stomach vocally agreed with the notion as he pulled down a heavy ceramic coffee mug and began to pour the steaming black liquid.

He took his other slice of toast and dipped a corner into the coffee, darkening the bread thoroughly before eating off that section. He'd never done that before, and curiosity killed cats, not chimeras. It actually wasn't that bad, he had to admit. Giving a shrug of his shoulders he dunked the bread again before finishing the rest of the toast and coffee normally.

After Roy made doubly sure that everything in his house was in order, he grabbed his suitcase again as well as the train ticket which was laying on the table just inside the door. He took his heavy black coat over one arm. He'd not need it yet, he was still in possession of one of the company cars to get him to the station. He could have returned it by now, but it wasn't as if anyone was harassing him about returning it anytime soon. Not if they wanted their paycheck at the end of the two week cycle.

So he locked the door and ran out through the lightly falling snow to the car while the light wind tugged at his still damp hair. Opening the car he tossed his suitcase and coat onto the passenger's seat before getting into the car himself and shutting the door to block out the wind. Dragging one hand back through his icy hair, and actually finding crystals of ice in the wetter sections, he started the engine. It sputtered to life, whining about the temperature, and he focused the heater vents on his hair.

Pulling out of his driveway he headed the car towards the train station. He had an early departure at seven a.m., and he didn't want to be late. It was the best time to leave to give him the maximum amount of time today to spend talking with Alphonse. He wasn't sure how much time he'd need to try and work out something with the mourning younger brother of his mate, but he was planning for the long haul.

The roads were fairly empty this early in the day. Only the bundled individuals on their bikes carting around the days newspapers clogged the roads. And those were few and far between. The more he drove towards the train station, which caused him to pass through the business district of the flourishing city, the more people he saw appearing as they made their way to work. The cars too became more on the roads. However Roy reached the train station and found parking before the larger amounts of pedestrians and vehicles took to the road.

Before he got out of the car he tugged on his heavy jacket, and pocketed the ticket in one of the front pockets. Seizing his suitcase he got out of the car and shut the door. Taking a deep breath, he looked around as if burning the image of the city into his mind one last time before he headed towards the station. Passing under the large metallic roof that scooped up and over the tracks to shade the people he brushed the snow off him with one hand as best he could. At least Central had cover over the many train tracks and platforms here, Risembool had none.

"Now let's see here…" Roy murmured to himself as he looked around for the proper train.

Spotting it, he made his way over to the corresponding platform to wait. They weren't boarding yet, but he was in no hurry to get on it anyway. Instead he went and sat on a nearby bench to avoid the queue that had started pointing and whispering at him. He could only imagine how this looked, their new Fuhrer with a packed suitcase and about to get on a train somewhere so soon after his induction into the position he'd claimed. He didn't feel like answering any questions though, his reason for going to Risembool was rather personal in nature.

Settling in to wait Roy let his thoughts drift for a moment, and he found himself staring a hole into the train as he contemplated his future. It was hardly a simple or easy path he'd chosen for himself. But what in his life ever had been anyway? Why stop now.

Roy only pulled his far off gaze from the train when a body sat itself down beside him on the bench. He quickly looked over, his face relaxing into an easy smile. "Yes?"

"I thought I should at least see you off." Edward said as he stared at the train as well.

"No wishes for good luck in coming back in one piece?" Roy teased, letting his gaze go back to the train as well and resume staring at it.

"I know you will." Edward replied quietly, and released a breath that sounded as if he'd been holding it for quite some time. "Remember the first time we were here together?"

Roy gave a short chuckle, "yes, I believe you despised me back then."

"At least that." Edward agreed lightly. "We've changed a lot since then, everything has changed a lot since then."

"A lot happened in not even ten years." Roy replied, "but people change, things change over time. It's inevitable. Those that hold onto the way things were are only setting themselves up for bitterness. The world will continue to advance, with or without them."

"Do you wish some things hadn't changed?" Edward asked now, clasping his gloved hands together stoically.

Roy gave that a moment of thought, now watching the smoke curl from the train as the fires were stoked. "A few things, but then some of the fondest parts of our past we wish we could have held onto forever."

"Such as?" Edward prodded.

"Friends… the ones who died. I can live with all the other changes, but losing people that were close to you makes a void nothing can fill easily."

"Maes?"

"Yeah."

"You don't wish sometimes that you could go back, redo that day and avoid that circle?" Edward asked, looking over at Roy now.

"It would depend." Roy finally answered, "if I could still have you, then yes. But if I would have gone on never knowing what could be between us, then I wouldn't want such a life."

Edward looked away again. "It just seems strange to me that for once I'm the one seeing you off on the train to Risembool. Not that you ever graced me with your presence much here anyway."

"You would have tried to bash my head in." Roy gave a faint smile.

"True." Edward smiled as well, "are you going to try and bash my head in for acting sentimental and seeing you off?"

"Yep." Roy answered in a matter of fact, and gave the blond a sidelong wink.

Edward chuckled to himself.

"What is it you would want to change?"

Edward let a small, somewhat amused smile come onto his face. "You promise not to think I'm crazy?"

"No."

Edward's smile did not fade, "I wish not all the Homunculi had died. Some of them… some of them weren't bad in the end. To be honest, the Homunculi and I were rather alike in that we wanted the Stone for something precious to our hearts. They wanted to become human, and who was I to try to deny them that when I wanted Al to become a human again too. Besides, the evil ones would have been easier to kill if they were humans. It would have saved us all a lot of trouble to get rid of the bad ones."

"That's not as crazy as you probably believe it is." Roy said after he thought about it. "Anyway," he stood up as the passengers began to board the train, "stay out of trouble while I'm gone, Fullmetal."

"Make sure you write a report, Flame." Edward smiled up at Roy as he slowly stood.

Roy smiled back at him, and extended his free hand to take on of Edward's in his own and squeeze it gently. "Goodbye."

"Bye." Edward returned the squeeze before their hands slipped apart.

Roy gave his mate one last look before turning and heading towards the train. He was nearly there when he heard Edward call after him: "And good luck!" He turned with a smile, one hand on the railing to help him onto the train. His eyes rested easily on the blond who still stood by the bench, his red jacket wrapped around him tightly to ward off the chill. With a slight chuckle, he mouthed the words 'I love you', before boarding the train.

Edward looked after him with a shadow of a smile, feeling warmer already. "I love you too." He whispered to himself before turning on his heel to begin striding away.

On the train Roy went to one of the private compartments reserved for military staff and slid the door shut behind him for privacy before taking a seat. He set his suitcase next to him, and gazed out the window to watch Edward walking away until he could no longer see the blond as the frame of the train around him obscured his view.

Pulling his ticket out of his pocket, Roy slid off his coat and laid it over his suitcase before relaxing back into the seat to wait.

The train soon started off from the platform with a great deal of noise that made Roy growl to himself in discomfort, and rub at his ears with a scowl which he directed at the empty seat across from him. Luckily the sounds soon died down to only the normal mechanical hums and grinds and the clacking of the wheels over the tracks.

It took nearly four hours, including other stops along the way before the train reached Risembool.

Roy rose from his seat with a stretch to ease the stiffness from his joints and muscles. He had gotten off at every other stop beforehand just to walk around a bit before the train was ready to leave again. However after having spent a good deal of time astride a horse and needing to use his balance to keep him upright, his body was unused to being able to just sit around anymore. Roy rolled his head around on his neck a few times before picking up his coat again as well as the suitcase.

As he descended from the train sunlight greeted him along with a faint warmth. It had snowed here, but it was melting currently and dropping from awnings. Compared to Central, right now this weather was positively heavenly.

Roy readjusted his hold on his suitcase before heading off towards the small town and to the road that would lead him towards the Rockbell residence. It had been a long time since he'd traveled this way. The most memorable of which had been during the middle of a storm nearly ten years ago. He remembered that night clearly, it had been a night that would forever end up changing so many lives, including his own. He'd laid eyes on Edward that night, never realizing just how much he'd grow to care for the blond alchemist. He couldn't have known that night that he'd walked into the presence of the one person who he'd treasure above all.

Smiling a faint smile Roy continued on walking up the dirt road. He wasn't really sure what his welcome would be from Alphonse. He suspected that Pinako would welcome him amiably enough. Like with Winry, he'd repaired things with the old woman concerning the death of her daughter, Winry's mother. As well as the father. He was less sure about how Alphonse would receive his presence.

Anger seemed to be the most likely. Or indifference. Either way, Roy was determined to go and speak to the young man. He needed to know that Alphonse wouldn't begrudge his brother the chance to be happy. Edward had a thick skin, but the select people he was close to could bring him up or tear him down far easier than could someone else. He didn't want Edward to become unhappy because Alphonse was still jaded by the death of his would-be-wife.

As Roy walked he took in the sights, sounds, and smells of the countryside. It really was a wonderful place. He could see how Edward enjoyed growing up out here. He was also fairly certain he could smell wolves in the far off mountains. Perhaps, should he have time, he would go find them. He doubted they would come near a human's house which was guarded over by a dog. Even if said dog had an automail limb.

The walk overall took almost an hour for Roy to get there. Most of the way was still fairly muddy from melted snow, and torn up by wheel ruts. Make it he did, to the initial greeting of Den, the Rockbell's dog, dashing over to him.

"Hey." He said simply and patted the dog's head. Unlike Hayate, Den didn't appear to have any issues with Roy's scent. Then, Den had always seemed to be a wise and smart dog. The animal had seen nothing wrong with a walking suit of armor, so it seemed Roy was to receive the same treatment and acceptance.

Roy ruffled the dog's ears and clucked to him as he resumed walking. The dog fell into step with him, panting cheerfully enough. He hadn't had much interaction with this dog before, but he was growing to become very fond of the animal. At least he wouldn't have to worry about the dog making a scene about his scent. He wasn't sure how he'd explain it to Alphonse or Pinako. They were slightly more suspicious at times than Hawkeye.

He climbed the stairs, Den still beside him, and walked over to the door. He set his suitcase down by his feet, and his coat over it before straightening again. He stared at the door for a moment, and took a deep breath before raising his hand. He rapped on it twice and stood to wait while Den twined about his legs like a cat.

Sounds of footsteps came from inside, and the lock in the door clicked before it was opened. In the doorway now stood Alphonse who had definitely seen better times. His clothes seemed to hang on him, and his hair looked dull and barely brushed. "Colonel." He greeted quietly, and frowned at Roy. "Is something wrong with brother?"

Roy shook his head, deciding to ignore the improper title. It didn't matter to him around someone like Al. "No, Ed's fine."

Al's gaze drifted down towards the suitcase. "Why are you here?" He asked, reverting his eyes back to Roy's face.

"Can we talk?" Roy proposed instead.

Al seemed to think it over for a minute before stepping back out of the doorway and holding the door from swinging closed again. "Come in."