Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns the Twilight universe. The title of this chapter and opening quote belong to Stew (Passing Strange).

Synopsis: Jasper has a serious question early in his relationship with Alice.

"So come down now, remove your mask. See, all you gotta do is ask me, I'll give you all the love life allows." - Come Down Now from Passing Strange

Come Down Now

The question was nagging at him, itching at the back of his throat so that every time he opened his mouth he had to swallow it down.

The first weeks with her were a unique kind of bliss, something he could have never imagined, could have never foreseen. His personal experiences left no room for the kind of relationship he'd stumbled into.

And therein lay the crux of it.

He could feel himself needing her, could feel himself moving clear past love and into the deeper realm of breathless necessity. Alice was becoming his reason for living; she was becoming the most basic of his needs. Humans needed to breathe and fish needed to swim but Jasper only needed Alice.

Jasper could handle love. He didn't understand it still, but he could handle it. Loving Alice was simple, an easy truth. He accepted it because it required no trust to love her. It required nothing but Alice being Alice and Jasper being Jasper. But to trust anyone enough to need them was a luxury, a lowering of his defenses, a slippery slope with no way back up.

He could walk away from love. He would be forever changed by it, forever haunted by it, but he could leave it be, could turn his back. But he could never walk away from the need, from the realization that loving Alice was his entire purpose, his entire reason for being.

It was already settling in, the bone-deep ache for her that was at first so foreign to him was becoming a familiar friend. Every piece of him longed to touch her, to taste, to claim. But he had to know, had to ask.

"Ask me," she said quietly from the passenger side of the car.

His hands tightened on the steering wheel, a white-knuckled grip that would leave permanent indentations. His throat ached as the words tried to fight their way out, as he tried, once more to swallow them down. And then they were out, laid before them in one breathless gasp, "Did you ever resent this fate?"

He watched the way her eyes widened and then narrowed. He caught her off guard and his own brow furrowed as he wondered what question she saw, as he wondered what decision he'd made and discarded.

Alice shook her head once, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear. "What?"

Jasper swallowed again, wishing he hadn't asked, wishing he didn't have to clarify. Don't ask questions if you don't want the answers, he reminded himself.

"Your first vision was of me. Didn't – didn't you ever try to – to make your own path?" His stammered words hung between them as her fingers brushed through her hair again, a clear sign of her nerves, of her discomfort.

"You want to know," she said slowly, "if I ever wanted to change this? If I ever wanted something else?"

He nodded once, glancing over at her and meeting her confused eyes with an awkward jerk of his head. "It just seems that...whatever gave you your vision of me made the decision for you."

Her hands settled on her lap, her back ramrod straight as she stared out the windshield, as she watched the countryside race by in a moonlit stream. "It didn't really work that way," she said quietly. She bit her lip lightly, clearly searching for the words to make him understand. "I know it's hard to imagine but when I woke, there was nothing there, just a void in my mind. And then your face appeared." She shrugged. "I guess – I guess I never considered not finding you because you were everything."

Jasper loosened his grip on the steering wheel and kept his eyes trained on the road. "But then you got other visions of me. You knew – you knew what I was like, what I'd done."

She breathed deeply and then did something that stunned him, that had him whipping his head around to stare at her wide-eyed.

She laughed.

"Where is this coming from, Jazz?" She leaned over and trailed her fingers across his forearm, beckoning him to let go of the wheel and give her his attention.

He pulled the car off the road and sat there, his fingers still wrapped around the wheel, his eyes still staring out at the night. "I'm in love with you."

She shook her head, her smile still stretched across her face. "I know that."

He was still, his eyes trained on nothing. "I think – I think I need you."

Her smile turned into a tight line, her face a mask of gentle understanding. Her hand trailed from his forearm down over his wrist. She touched scar after scar on her path to his knuckles. He released his grip and let her thread her fingers through his. "I never resented having my fate decided, Jasper. I never wanted anything but you."

"What about the Cullens?"

"I want a family. But if the argument is ever them or you, well...I choose you every time."

"Why?" he whispered.

She tightened her grip on his hand. "Look at me, Jazz," she murmured. He complied, his still heart lurching as he took in the determination written across her perfect face. "I would not have survived without those visions. You might just be coming around to needing me but...from that first vision, that first look at your face, I needed you." Her brow furrowed and her grip loosened just a bit. "Do you – do you resent having your fate tied up with mine?"

He flinched just a little, recoiling from the punch of her words so soon on the heels of everything he'd needed to hear. "This has been the best time of my life, the – the biggest blessing of my life. I just had to know."

Alice tilted her head. Why? the gesture asked.

Jasper felt the corners of his mouth lift in a small smile. Because I already need you. Because if you break my heart I'll never recover. Because my life has never allowed for hope to take root. "Because I'm past the point of no return."

Her smile matched his. "Good," she said clearly. "Then you're all caught up."

Note: I know, I know. I disappeared for a spell. Real life kept me insanely busy since I last posted. I have a couple more chapters ready to go for this story that I will post in the coming days.

If you are a fan of Some Rise by Sin, I'll be posting on that one probably in a week or so. Just hang in there, life if getting more normal and less stressful.

Thanks for the reviews and messages and emails and faves. I got hundreds and hundreds of fanfic related emails while I was away and that was really what tugged me back. So thanks. I'll try to wade through them and answer any questions that were asked or reply to those that asked for a reply but if it's pressing, feel free to PM me again.

Thanks also for all of your patience and kind, encouraging words. You're the best bunch of readers a gal could ask for.

Please review!

- Brynna