The three of them had left Daryl and Merle's dad's house and Merle had insisted on being dropped off at the bar. Carol couldn't help but notice the sad, blank stare in his eyes and the monotonous tone in his voice. He'd stared out the window the entire ride, not bothering to look over at her or Daryl. She was worried about him, she'd never heard him be so quiet before. She had decided to text Andrea and see if she'd ride to the bar and check on him in a bit. She told her about lunch with their dad and how horrible it had ended up. Andrea had promised to go check on him as soon as she got off work.

Daryl hadn't seemed much better than Merle. He'd been just as silent, although that wasn't as unusual for him. However, his hand was gripped so tightly around the steering wheel that his knuckles were turning white and he hadn't let his eyes move from the road. She felt terribly guilty for going off on their dad. Maybe she shouldn't have and maybe it over stepped some boundaries, but she couldn't help it. Hearing him talk like that about them had made her blood boiling. She couldn't just sit there and listen to it anymore. When he tried to take credit for how well they turned out that was her breaking point because that was the biggest fucking joke ever. He'd done a number on both of them, just in completely different ways. But in the end, she knew he was still their dad, the only parent that they had left. She was worried they were upset with her about it and she felt like she ruined their Christmas Eve.

She moved closer to Daryl in the truck after he dropped Merle off. She was about to ask him if he was okay when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. It was a text from Jacquie.

"I need you to come in for a little while. Jan got sick at work and we need someone to cover her shift. We're really short-handed and I know you said you weren't doing Christmas with your family until tomorrow."

She looked up at Daryl before responding. She knew he was upset. Merle was at the bar. She didn't want to leave him alone. "Is there anyone else who can come in? I'm with Daryl right now and he's dealing with some family stuff."

"Sorry sweetie, everyone else I texted was in the middle of a family thing or out of town. I hate to ask, but I really need your help."

She let out a sad sighed. "Give me twenty minutes. I've got to get home and change into my scrubs."

"Thanks, you're the best."

He glanced down when he heard her sigh and saw her typing away at her phone. "Everything okay?" He asked, quietly.

"Jacquie said one of the girls at work got sick and she needs me to come in and cover for her….I told her I was with you and asked if there was anyone else that could come in….she said there isn't."

He nodded, sweeping his gaze back up on the road. "I'll take you home to get changed." He replied, solemnly.

She kept her eyes trained on him. He looked so sad, so defeated. The thought of leaving him right now was making her feel sick. "Are you okay? I don't wanna leave you alone. If you need me to stay with you, I'll text her back and tell her that I can't come."

"You ain't been working there that long…..you better just go on since they asked you….I'll be fine." He said, gruffly.

"Daryl.."

"I'll be fine…I'm just gonna go home and go out in the woods for a while…If I don't see nothing there I'll go get a jump start on stuff at the shop for next week. Ain't no big deal."

He was being short with her and there was a harshness to his voice as he spoke. She felt like he was upset with her about what happened back at his dad's. "Are you mad at me for what I said?" She asked, carefully.

He looked down at her and shook his head. He was mad, but he wasn't mad at her. He realized the way his voice must sound to her and how agitated he must seem. He didn't mean for any of that to be directed at her, but everything that happened had him in a mood. "Ain't mad at you." He told her, softly. "Everything you said was the truth….asshole needed to hear it."

"Do you think Merle is? Is that why he wanted to go to the bar?"

He shook his head. "Merle's been drinking since before we left the house. Don't got nothing to do with what you said…..He knows it's the damn truth too."

She nodded and linked her arms around his and rested her head on his shoulder. "I love you and I'm here for you if you wanna talk about it."

He nodded. "I know you are….you always have been…I love you too."

()()()

She'd just gotten off work and was more than ready to get home. She'd been worried about Daryl ever since she had to leave earlier. She hated that he had spent the afternoon alone and all she wanted to do was get home and put her phone on charge so she could call him. She was worried about Merle too. She really hoped Andrea had gone and checked on him. When she made her way over the top of the hill on her way back home she saw a man walking. She quickly realized it was Daryl. She pulled up beside him and stopped the car. "You okay?" She asked, not hiding the concern on her face.

He met her eyes then looked back down at the ground and shook his head. "Can I stay with you?"

"Get in." She told him, and nodded towards the passenger side door. "My phone died at work. Did you try to call?"

"Yeah…..I figured. It kept going to voicemail….Knew you would be getting off soon and I was just gonna wait for you on the porch….didn't wanna drive the bike and wake your folks up."

"Did Merle ever come home?"

He shook his head again. "Haven't heard nothing from him since dropping him off….he prolly met some girl and went home with her." He shrugged. "Kinda how he deals with shit. You know?"

Carol grimaced. That would have been horrible if he had been chatting up some other girl and Andrea walked in the bar to find him.

()()()

The two of them made their way inside and headed back to her room. All the lights were off and her parents had long since been asleep. The smell of baked ham and pecan pies lingered in the kitchen from what her mother had been preparing earlier. Once they reached her room she shut her door and quickly pulled her scrubs off. She threw on some night clothes and looked at Daryl who'd been sitting on the bed watching her. He was nervously chewing his thumb. "Do you want pajama's or do you wanna sleep in your boxers?" She asked.

"Don't matter." He mumbled and pulled his shirt off. He looked over at the door and then back to her. "What if one of them opens the door in the morning?"

She walked over to the door and turned the lock. "Better?"

He shrugged and went to undo his pants. After he was down to just his boxers he fell back on the bed and placed his hands over his face.

She moved in bed beside him and wrapped her arms around him and laid her head on his chest.

When he felt her move beside him and put his arms around his body and he shifted on his side and pulled her into him as close as he could. He needed to be near her right now. He needed to be as close as he could to her right now. Not in a sexual way, but he just physically needed her next to him at the moment. He'd needed her for as long as he could remember, far before he knew he was in love with her, before he was even old enough to know what love was, he'd needed her. She was the first person, other than Merle, who'd made him feel like he'd mattered since his mom died. Made him feel like he was safe. Hell, probably even more so than Merle had back then, because Merle was dealing with their mom's loss too. And while Daryl' way of dealing with it had been shutting down and shutting everyone out, his way of dealing with it had been by acting out and staying in trouble. That didn't leave much time for consoling his baby brother. He rested his head against hers and tightened his grip around her. He thought back to all those years ago on the bus when he was just getting to know her. When she'd kept trying to talk to him after he'd tried so damn hard to ignore her or be rude to her.

****Flashback****

He was gazing out of the bus window, just like he did every morning, trying his best to ignore every fucking kid on this bus. He hated the bus. It was loud and there were too many people on it. He'd had a seat by himself since he started school. Of course that all changed at the beginning of school last week when that new girl, Carol, had been assigned to sit with him. She bugged the hell out of him. He had just wanted to mind his own business and look out of his window, but she'd tried to talk to him anyway. Then after he got rude with her she pulled out that stupid pop tart and ate it in front of him. He hadn't talked to her since and she hadn't talked to him, but each day she'd gotten on the bus, she'd chunked a pop tart in his lap. He'd look up and meet her eyes questioningly. She'd never respond, she'd just let her eyes linger for a moment and then looked away. He'd eat the pop tart in silence on the way to school, while she sat there eating the one she brought for herself. It drove him crazy, wondering why she kept doing that, despite the fact that he'd been mean to her. She was in almost all of his classes and she'd even given him a pencil when he didn't have one the other day and the teacher asked if anyone had one he could use. He didn't understand her in the least. Most people just ignored him after he treated them like that, and although she was being silent with him, not speaking to him, she was far from ignoring him. In fact, he'd noticed her eyes on him a few times at school. This particular morning when she tossed the pop tart in his lap and he looked up at her, without thinking, he spoke. "Thanks." He mumbled.

She looked back over at him, almost in shock he'd said something and that the thing he said was nice. "You're welcome." She replied, cooly.

He looked back over at her. Thinking about saying something else, but not knowing what to say. He didn't exactly have friends. Hell, he'd barely spoken to anyone all summer. Not even his dad or his brother. What few people that did talk to him just muttered shit about being sorry for his loss. Offering hollow condolences. Ones that probably made them feel like good people, but just made him relieve his loss. This girl probably didn't know about any of that though, seeing as how she just moved here, but he still decided talking to her wasn't worth the trouble. He was pissed off at the world right now. He had no room for friends. So, he placed his head back against the window and peeled his pop tart wrapper back and started breaking it apart and shoving bits and pieces into his mouth. He ignored her for the rest of the ride.

"What's your favorite kind?" She asked him, as the bus pulled to a stop in front of the elementary school.

He looked back over at her and cocked his brows. "What?"

"Your favorite kind of pop tart….my mom's going shopping today and she wants to know what kind I want."

"Why?" He asked, scrunching his face.

"Figured you're getting tired of blueberry….I know I am." She mumbled. "Might as well bring you some kind you like if you're going to be eating them too…If you don't want me to bring you anymore just say so." She rolled her eyes.

He really didn't understand this girl at all, but he liked pop tarts and actually having something to eat in the morning. He just shrugged. "Smore's are good." He muttered

()()()

"I need you." He whispered, as he buried his head between her neck and her shoulder blades.

She rolled over to face him and ran a hand through his hair. She moved her lips on his and let them linger. "I'm right here." She assured him.

He pulled apart from her and met her eyes. "I wouldn't be who I am….not without you….I was fucked up….I'm still fucked up." He confessed. "But if I hadn't met you….."

"You're not fucked up." She interrupted. "Don't let what your dad said get inside your head. He's the one who's fucked up…not you…not Merle…..him."

"Yeah, but…"

"No. No buts." She told him, sternly. She hated seeing him hurting, seeing him so vulnerable. "I meant everything I said earlier. I'm proud of you….You're smart and kind and talented. You're passionate and loyal. You'd do anything for the people you love…If he can't see what an amazing person you are, then he doesn't deserve to be in your life….I know he's your dad…but he's not good for you."

He laid his head on hers. "I just…..I wanted him….to be proud of me….to be proud of Merle. I thought we could tell him how good business was…Show him how hard we'd been working….and that he was wrong when he'd said we'd never be shit…never have shit. It's fucking stupid…I know."

"It's not stupid." She told him softly, as she gripped her hands around his waist. "Some people just don't ever change."

"That's not always a bad thing." He replied, as he held her gaze.